The Rocker That Savors Me (The Rocker...) (24 page)

“I’m the one that’s sorry, baby.” I caught her fingers and kissed each one. “I went a little crazy tonight. My only excuse is that I was jealous, and that’s a new emotion for me. I’ve never experienced anything like what I have with you. It’s terrifying at times.”

Her smile was all quivery, and I wanted to erase this night from both our minds. “It scares me too. The way I love you is more intense than anything I’ve ever felt before.”

“Can you forgive me for thinking the worst?” If she didn’t forgive me I didn’t know what I was going to do. Without her
, my future was a big, blank void.

“I forgave you as soon as I realized you were hurt.” She sighed. “I won’t lie. It hurt that you thought I would have been with Tommy
, but I understand your jealousy. If our places were reversed I would have gone over the top too. I’m crazy obsessed with you.”

I grinned.
“Me too, babe.”

Her fingers stroked over my head. If I hadn’t been in so much pain I was sure it would have made me hard, just as it always did when she touched me like this
, but for now I was dead in that department. Still, it made my heart race, and I tugged on her hair until she lowered her head and skimmed her lips over mine. “I love you, Layla.”

“I love you, too.”

Layla

We were at the hospital all night. Doctors came and
went, only to have more doctors come and go. After X-rays, CT scans, blood work, and a urine sample were collected, it was determined that Jesse had a severely bruised left kidney and would have to spend the night for observations. Thankfully, he didn’t have blood in his urine and it was only after the urologist on call had come in to explain the severity of what that possibility could mean did I understand that Jesse had been very lucky.

Drake left at dawn, but I stayed. I couldn’t leave him. I watched over him while he slept, thanks to the painkillers that they
fed into his IV. He looked peaceful even with his face all swollen and varying shades of blue, purple, and black.

I had been scared last night before he had come home.
Scared that he wasn’t going to want me anymore. Scared that Tommy was going to fill his head with all kinds of sick things that would make him hate me. That fear had only made the hurt worse last night. But when I had opened that door and seen my battered love standing on the other side everything else didn’t matter anymore.

I just wanted to kiss it all better and have him hold onto me forever…

Around nine, the doctor came in and told Jesse he could go home. He was ordered to rest. I was told to make sure Jesse was going to the bathroom regularly and what to watch for in case he needed to come back. I paid extra attention, afraid I would miss something important.

Shane
showed up to take us home. When we returned to the beach house Emmie met us at the door. She was pale and an emotional wreck. Nik hadn’t told her anything until Shane had left to pick us up. I tried to soothe her, but she was off the walls today. She went from crying, to sobbing, to pissed off in the blink of an eye and you never knew which was coming next.

Right now
, she was pacing in the living room, shooting Jesse glares from time to time as she muttered under her breath. I sat there, watching her while I stroked my fingers over the stubble on Jesse’s head as he laid there trying to relax. He was pale under the rainbow of bruises on his face. The pain killers they had prescribed for him were making him loopy but they were also making him nauseous too.

“I can’t believe you didn’t know that Tommy Kirkman was her father!”

My head snapped up at Emmie’s sudden outburst. She was pacing still—well waddling. Her feet were swollen and the baby was so low now that Emmie walked bowlegged most of the time. She was so cute to look at, but right now I was so stunned by my friend’s tirade that I didn’t see the cuteness.

Jesse frowned up at her. “You mean you did?”

“Of course I knew.” She stopped to glare down at him. “I’ve known since the first week she started working here.” Her eyes went to me, and I saw an apology in their green depths. “I had to do a background check on you, Layla. I know I should have told you, but I needed to know if there was anything that might hurt Jesse. Even then, I knew that he was crazy about you…”

I gave her a small smile. “It’s okay. I understand.” I would have done the same in her position. Jesse and the guys were her family
, and she wanted to protect them just as much as I wanted to protect Lana and Lucy.

“Why didn’t you tell me?” Jesse demanded, setting up.

“Because I didn’t think it mattered. So she’s Tommy’s daughter? Who the fuck cares? That doesn’t change who she is.” Emmie brushed the hair out of her eyes. “And I figured that if she wasn’t going to tell us then there was a good reason.”

“But…”

Emmie climbed onto his lap and wrapped her arms around his neck. “I love you. You know that you and Drake and Shane mean the world to me. But Layla has grabbed onto my heart too. The minute you said you loved her, she became partial owner of my heart too.”

I bit my lip as tears burn
ed the backs of my eyes.

“So when I got the report back on her
, my loyalties were split. I wasn’t going to betray her by telling you all her secrets. That was between you and her. If she told you, then fine. If she didn’t, that was fine too. But I couldn’t be the one to tell you. Still I’m surprised that you couldn’t see that she was Tommy’s daughter. Fuck, Jesse. She looks so much like him.”

I grimaced, not sure that was a complement or not. “I didn’t say anything because Tommy means nothing to me
,” I told them. “He rarely crosses my mind. To me, he isn’t my father.” I knew that legally I wasn’t supposed to say anything about Tommy to anyone, but these were my friends. If I couldn’t trust them to keep my secrets, then I couldn’t trust anyone. That had been my mistake to begin with. I should have told Jesse about my dad weeks ago when he told me about his own childhood.

“No, he isn’t
,” Emmie agreed. “He’s just a pile of shit taking up space. The first time I met him I was seventeen and he tried to seduce me.”

Three heads snapped up at that. Shane was sitting on the other end of the sectional with Nik. “The fuck you say!” Nik exploded. “You never told me that.”

She rolled her eyes. “He was your friend. You all had nothing but good things to say about the great Tommy Kirkman. I didn’t want to spoil your image of him.”

“I’m going to gut him
,” Nik muttered.

“Stab him a few times for me, babe.” Emmie winked at him.

After that the atmosphere in the house went back to normal. Emmie’s emotions evened out, and we spent the rest of the day watching television. Lucy came over and sat with Jesse after lunch. I hadn’t wanted her to see him all beaten up, but she was just as worried about him as I was. In the last few weeks, he had become special to her. He was something that she had never had before, a father figure that spoiled her rotten.

She sat on his lap and cuddled with him, kissing a boo-boo from time to time. Jesse held me close to his side
, and I was content. It felt like the three of us were a family.

The next week passed by in a blur. Saturday night was put behind us
, and I was happy to be moving forward. Jesse’s bruises started to fad, and his face got back to the same sinful sexiness I loved so much. The guys stayed home. Since Jesse couldn’t go into the studio, they took the week off.

I loved having him around during the day. It made work so much more interesting. But I also enjoyed having the other guys around too. Drake and I had gotten close over the last few weeks. I understood him better now and didn’t ever question his feelings toward my sister anymore. Drake was a good man
, and I would trust him with Lana’s life. I liked spending time with Shane and Nik too.

It felt like we were all just one big family
, and I loved every minute of it.

…Emmie…

I woke to an empty bed. That made me particularly sad
, and I snuggled Nik’s pillow close for a few minutes before forcing myself to get out of bed. I had gotten spoiled the week before. Having Nik home and all to myself—getting to sleep with him until noon—had been my own personal paradise.

T
his week he was back at the studio. He wanted to get as many songs recorded as possible before I went in to have my scheduled C-section next week. So far there was a list of songs a mile long that they had already gotten down, but I knew that only a fraction of them would make the new album. It just depended on how the label wanted to go. What direction they thought the new material should go in. Nik and the guys had the final say so on what they put on there, but the big guys in suits would have a bigger say in it all.

Missing Nik
, I got up and showered. I was feeling really good today. Better than I had in what felt like a long time. This last trimester had kicked my ass that was for sure!

Once I was clean I got out and wrapped a towel around myself. My stomach peeked through and I grinned at myself in the mirror. I kind of liked the pregnant belly I had gotten, despite the ugly stretch marks that I had
to go along with it.

After I was dressed
, I went around the bedroom straightening up the room. Tossing Nik’s underwear in the hamper in the bathroom, I found that I couldn’t stand the sight of my bathroom so disorganized. Before I knew what I was doing, I had the bathroom looking like new.

Standing up from having scrubbed the tub
, I felt a small pinch in my lower back. Grimacing, I put the cleaning supplies back under the sink, but I still felt restless. The urge to clean was almost overwhelming. After I washed my hands, I went downstairs to see if Layla needed help with anything.

My friend was a dream when it came to keeping my house clean. The place shined.
Especially the kitchen, which was where I found Layla. She was scrubbing the counters when I walked in. Seeing me, she grinned. “Hey, sleepy head. Enjoy your chance to sleep in?”

I smiled back. “It was nice
, but I missed Nik. You don’t have to do my bathroom today, by the way. I took care of that for you. “

The grin on Layla’s face dimmed. “You were cleaning?”

I shrugged. “Yeah. I just felt this need to clean… Why are you looking at me like that?” Layla was frowning at me with concern.

“Emmie, you’re nesting.”

“Oh.” I had read about that in all those books Nik and I had bought. The need to get the “nest” ready before the baby showed up. There was some old wives tale about it being a sign that the baby was on its way. “I guess I am nesting. I feel kind of restless. Is there anything left to clean?”

“No!” Layla tossed her rag in the sink and washed her hands. “I’m going to make you something to eat
, and you are going to go sit on the sectional. You’re going to watch television and not move unless you have to.”

Her concern touched me, but I actually had energy for the first time in weeks. I wasn’t wasting it sitting around. “Relax, Layla. I want to do something.”

She was already getting the bacon out of the fridge. “What would you like for breakfast?”

I glanced at the clock on the stove. “It’s too late for breakfast. How about a sandwich? Will you eat with me?” I loved getting to have a quiet meal with Layla. Even when we didn’t talk
, it was nice just to be around her.

“Will you promise to rest afterwards?”

I sighed. “I really don’t want to.”

Her chocolate brown eyes narrowed on me. “I’m not Jesse. That little pouty thing doesn’t work on me.”

I laughed. I hadn’t even realized that I was pouting. “Oh Layla. I’m so happy that you came into our lives.”

For the next half an hour
, we sat at the island and shared lunch. It was crazy how quickly I had included her in our family, it was even more so that I couldn’t imagine my family without her or her sisters. I was glad that Jesse was able to find happiness with someone as loving and full of life as Layla, someone who didn’t put up with his shit…Or mine.

“Okay, I’m going to go watch
television now.” I grinned as I stood up. “Want to join me?”

She grimaced. “I have a load of clothes in the drier. Shane has more clothes than Lana.”

I laughed. Shane was worse than any girl when it came to clothes. He was the only one of my guys that I didn’t have to shop for. “Good luck with that.”

Layla stuck her tongue out at me. “Thanks!”

Still laughing, I turned around and started out of the kitchen. Two steps and I stopped. There was a sudden pressure between my legs. Just as suddenly it was gone. I didn’t think anything of it until I felt my panties getting soaked. When I realized what was happening fear overtook me and I screamed.

“Oh. FUCK!” Layla exclaimed.

Jesse

“I can’t believe you just said that, dude!” I wiped my mouth with my napkin and tossed a fry at Shane. He had been telling crazy, funny jokes from the time we had sat down for lunch. Already, Nik had spit soda out his nose, and I was sure that Shane was determined to make us all do the same.