Authors: Dianne Blacklock
âI blame your hairdresser,' Emma snorted. âYou've got good hair, Ellen, we all do actually â fortunately both the Becketts and the Turners helped us out there. But you need to get some shape into yours to suit your face.'
âNot too short!' she warned. âI like to put it up in a clip or a ponytail.'
Ellen curled her lip. âSo I've noticed. You're not going to want to do that after Rene finishes with it.'
Rene was a tall, slender, terribly attractive man, with some kind of South American lineage, Ellen guessed. But he looked at her hair with such disdain Ellen was embarrassed by it. He tuttutted and shook his head, despairing at the amateur colour job, the dreadful condition, the way it had been hacked, according to him.
âBut don't worry, I will fix,' he told Emma.
Ellen had never spent so long in a hairdresser's chair in all her life, she even nodded off a couple of times, till Rene would come along and yank her back to life, inspecting the foils, sending her off to the basins, and then back again for another application of colour and more foils. She couldn't watch when he started to cut; she couldn't tell what he was doing, but he seemed to be taking off an awful lot, and Ellen was too intimidated to tell him not too much. But when he began to blow-dry it, and it fell into perfect golden waves around her face, Ellen almost didn't recognise herself. She had to blink back tears.
âBeautiful,' Emma said proudly, as though she had done it herself.
The final step was makeup, and after that Ellen really didn't recognise herself. How did they make her eyes look so big, her skin so smooth? And where had her double chin gone? All that, but she didn't really look âmade up', she looked quite natural, and . . . well, damn it, she looked
attractive
. Ellen had never considered herself very attractive; maybe when she was young she
was all right, but as the saying went, her looks had faded. This was like they'd filled them all in again.
Emma snapped her out of her reverie. âCome on, we have to get you home and dressed. We're not going to waste all this by making you late for your interview.'
When she was finally dressed in the complete outfit, shoes and all, Ellen looked at the full effect in the mirror in her bedroom, and she was bowled over. Tears sprung into her eyes.
Emma came to stand behind her. âLook at you.'
âIt's unbelievable,' said Ellen. âYou know, if you took a photo of me right now, and I saw it, without having seen myself, in the flesh . . .'
Emma was frowning.
âJust go with me,' said Ellen. âWhat I'm trying to say is that if I saw a photo of myself looking like this, I wouldn't know it was me.'
Emma smiled then. âYou know what my philosophy is?'
âYeah, yeah, I know, I should be taking better care of myself.'
âNo, that's not what I was going to say. I realise most women can't go to this much trouble every day, or even every week.'
âOr even every month,' Ellen muttered.
Emma nodded. âIt's a huge commitment, and the problem is, once you get started, you can't stop.' She looked a little wistful. âSometimes I wonder what Blake would do if I let myself go. That's why I'm scared to have babies. I mean, I know I could bounce back, but it's hard to look like this when you're in labour.'
Ellen saw something in her eyes she hadn't seen before, vulnerability perhaps?
âI'm sure Blake would love you no matter how you looked.'
Emma gave a dismissive little laugh. âAnyway, I was saying, my philosophy â or maybe it's not so much a philosophy as a tip â but I believe that every woman should have a makeover, or a professional photo shoot, at least once in their lives. Because even if they don't want to go to the trouble every day of making themselves beautiful, at least they'll know that they can look as good as the women on the covers of magazines if they want to. And then they can feel better about themselves the rest of the time.'
Catching sight of herself in the mirror again, Ellen felt bad for
every time she'd ever dismissed Emma's work. She knew this was all only surface stuff and what was inside was more important, but today she didn't care, today she felt beautiful, and she hadn't felt beautiful in a very long time.
âWell I don't know how to thank you,' she said in a small voice, her lip trembling.
âUh-oh!' Emma scolded. âYou'll ruin your makeup. Okay, there's just one more thing. Where's your handbag?'
Ellen picked up the bag she'd been carting around all day.
âI thought as much,' said Emma, dashing out to the hall and coming back with a designer carrier bag.
âWhat's this?' said Ellen when she handed it to her.
âTake a look.'
Ellen lifted out a gorgeous red leather tote, the kind she'd only seen in magazines or in movies on the arms of actresses. âOh my God!' she exclaimed. âAre you lending me this for the interview?'
âNo, silly, I'm giving it to you. It's my good-luck gift.'
Now Ellen couldn't speak at all. The tears were choking her throat.
âI said no crying!' Emma ordered. âYou'll ruin your makeup!'
So instead Ellen stepped forward and put her arms around her sister.
âDon't crush your shirt! Careful!'
When she stepped back, she was pretty sure Emma had tears in her eyes as well.
âOkay, so go knock âem dead.'
Ellen slid carefully into the driver's seat now, smoothing out her skirt. She pulled the car door closed and took a deep breath, smiling happily. The interview had gone well. How could it not: she felt like she could do anything, the way she looked.
So what now? She didn't want to put all this to waste and just go home and watch a DVD on her own. The kids were at Tim's, so she couldn't even show off to them. She wanted to celebrate . . . She knew Emma was busy; she wondered if Liz was free for a drink. Ellen tapped her manicured nails on the steering wheel, thinking, and then she had a better idea. Her next
payment to Finn was due; she should have transferred it today but it had slipped her mind, not surprisingly. She could just drive over there and pay it in person. Her heart skipped a beat as she started up the engine. Her sisters said she had to put herself out there, but this wasn't that. She was just . . . broadening her social circle. Finn could be counted as a friend now, and Ellen had to develop new friendships . . . with other single people. That's all it was.
When she arrived at the garage, she pulled into her regular spot and cut the engine. She quickly checked herself in the rearview mirror. Boy, she didn't even need to touch up her lipstick, this makeup was so good. She smiled at herself, picked up the red handbag and stepped out of the car.
As she walked across the tarmac to the office, Ellen became conscious that she was even walking a little differently in these shoes, in this skirt. Perhaps it was the entire outfit, or perhaps it was just that she
was
conscious, but there was a slight sway to her hips. Now she just had to make sure she didn't trip and fall over, that would certainly ruin the effect.
She heard a wolf-whistle and looked across to see Finn standing in the entrance to the workshop, holding his regular Friday afternoon beer, gazing at her with obvious admiration.
âEllen,' he said in a quizzical tone, âis that you?'
She smiled and turned to walk towards him. âIt's a version of me,' she said. âNew and improved.'
âI liked the old Ellen well enough,' he said as she came closer. âBut this is not bad.'
âNot bad?' she said, raising an eyebrow as she stopped in front of him.
âNot bad at all.'
Ellen felt a frisson, like electricity passing between them. She hoped she wasn't blushing, but no matter, the makeup would hide it. Finn was staring at her, and she realised that she was staring back. Someone had to say something.
âSo I was just passing,' she began, âand I realised I hadn't paid my account today. I thought I might as well do it in person.'
âI'm glad you did,' he said. âWhere have you been? Doesn't look like it was a regular school day.'
âI had an interview this afternoon, at a private school.'
âAh,' he nodded. âThat explains it. How'd it go?'
âIt went pretty well, I think.'
âI'm not surprised, you look like you'd fit right in,' he said. âWell, I reckon this calls for a drink, to celebrate.'
She smiled. âMaybe I could stomach a beer, just this once.'
âNo way, we can't hang around here with you all dressed up like that,' said Finn. âI know a nice place up the road we can go.'
Ellen wasn't expecting that. âOh, are you sure?'
âYeah, Dave's still here, he's working on a mate's car. He can close up.' He looked at her. âYou don't have to be somewhere?'
âNo . . .' she said meekly.
He nodded. âGood. Give me a sec and I'll clean up, change out of this shirt. So I'm fit to be seen with you.'
As soon as he turned away, Ellen began to feel twitchy. She started to pace. Was this
something
like a date? Because if it was, she should really slow down and think it out more. You don't just drop in on someone, casually, on a Friday afternoon and
start
something. No, it wasn't anything. He was her mechanic, for godsakes, and they had become friends, wasn't that nice? To have someone she could go out for a drink with, someone who wasn't one of her sisters. It definitely wasn't
something
.
She peered into the workshop. Finn was standing at a sink at the back wall, his shirt off, splashing water over himself. He straightened, reached for a towel on a hook on the wall, and turned around, drying himself while he spoke to Dave, who was bent over under the hood of a car. Ellen just stood there, staring, following the path of the towel, across his chest, his shoulders, his arms, his abs . . . Her mouth went dry . . . probably because it was hanging open, she realised, closing it quickly and looking away. But her heart was still fluttering erratically. What was that about? Couldn't she even look at a man with his shirt off without going weak at the knees? Clearly she had been deprived of sex for way too long. God, why did she have to go and think about sex?
âEllen?'
She swung around with a start.
âWow, where were you just then?' Finn was smiling at her as he buttoned up his shirt, from the bottom up, which meant his chest was exposed, smack in front of her. âEllen?'
âHuh?' She jerked her head back, making eye contact; keep making eye contact, look him in the eye, for godsakes.
âYou were a million miles away.'
Not nearly that far. Ellen swallowed. âOh, just . . . going over the interview in my head.'
âWell, you can tell me all about it over a drink,' he said. âYou want me to drive, or you can drive, whatever . . .'
âNo, you drive,' she said quickly. She was afraid her powers of concentration were not up to the task right now.
They drove all the way to the point at Abbotsford, and the Rowing Club.
âThis all right with you?' Finn asked when he pulled up in the parking lot.
âOh sure,' she remarked. âIt's a bit fancy.' Not really his style, she would have thought, but she kept that to herself.
âI think they'll let you in, you look pretty fancy,' he said with a grin.
They went inside and found a table out on the deck, overlooking the water. Finn went to the bar to get the drinks. When he returned, they toasted to her success and he asked her all about the interview. There was a panel of five, she told him, comprising the principal, the deputy responsible for curriculum, a parent representative, plus the head teachers from both the English and History departments. It had been thorough, but polite, she hadn't felt particularly put on the spot at any time. As far as interviews went, it had leaned more on the side of conversation than interrogation.
âThat's good, isn't it?' Finn asked.
âI think so,' she said, reflecting. âThat's as long as they were taking me seriously and not just filling in time. If they were really interested, maybe they would have been more rigorous, put me on the spot . . .'
âHey, is that your glass half-empty?'
Ellen glanced down at her wine. âNo, it's fine.' She looked up at him and he was grinning at her. âOh, okay, I get it. I will rephrase â it was a good interview, very positive.'
âIs this something you've always wanted?' he asked.
âNo way,' she shook her head. âI come from a family of public school teachers, I never dreamed I'd be doing this.'
âSo why are you?'
âI need the money,' she said simply. âThere's this standover mechanic I owe big-time.'
He grinned, shaking his head. âI really hope that's not the reason.'
âNo,' she assured him. âI'm just sick of only barely making ends meet. I'm on my own now, I have to find a way to earn more money.'
âGee,' he said, sitting back and holding his hands up as though he was weighing things on a scale. âMoney or principles? It's a tough one.'
âDon't be awful,' she protested. âIt's not like I'm going to work for the enemy, sell state secrets or anything.'
âNo, just your soul.'
Ellen was intrigued. âYou've really got something against private schools, haven't you? What, did the poncy kids on the bus tease you when you were a kid?'
He considered her for a moment. âLook, I'm just saying . . . what if there were no private schools?'
âWhat, and no religion too?' Ellen raised an eyebrow. âYou sound like a John Lennon song.'
âNothing wrong with that,' he returned. âI just think there should be a level playing field.'
âIt's never a level playing field, Finn,' she said. âI realise kids from private schools have an advantage, but so do kids in public schools from better areas. It's wealth that makes the difference.'