Authors: Dianne Blacklock
Later, after they'd had sex, and Andrew had left, Liz lay awake staring at the ceiling for a long time. She knew she was important to him; she knew his life was hard and that she made it easier. She gave him something he couldn't get anywhere else. It was selfish to think about herself, her needs, when his needs were so much greater, when he needed her so very much. That's what love was all about, wasn't it?
But there was a voice inside her that had been murmuring away in the background for a while now. Lately it had started to grow louder and more insistent.
What's in it for me?
By the time Ellen and Liz arrived at the bridal
salon
, as Emma insisted on referring to it, Cara had already been and gone and Tayla was standing on a podium while a seamstress knelt at her feet, pinning up the hem.
âHi,' Evie greeted them with a forced smile.
âYou look great,' said Ellen, kissing her on the cheek.
âHow much weight have you lost?' Liz added as she kissed her on the other cheek.
âI'm not sure,' she shrugged. âI haven't really been keeping track.'
âOkay Tayla, I think you're done,' Emma was saying. âYou can take her back to get changed now, Evie.'
âWow,' Ellen turned to Tayla, âdon't you look gorgeous.'
Tayla was clearly chuffed.
âThat's a beautiful shade,' Liz remarked. âWhat do you call that, Em?'
âChampagne,' she said briskly.
âSo is that just for Tayla?' Ellen asked. âOr are you thinking about it for everyone?'
âI'm not thinking about it â I've decided. This is the colour.
Kate's already in the dressing room getting changed, so hurry along, Liz, and we'll get this over and done with as quickly as possible.'
As they ducked behind the curtains, Ellen whispered to Liz, âWhat's her hurry?'
âI don't know. She must have to
dash
off somewhere.'
âYoo-hoo, Kate, I'm here,' Ellen called.
A moment later Kate stepped out of one of the cubicles. She looked lovely; the dress was simple but beautifully cut, and the colour was perfect. âYou look stunning. Come on, let's go show Aunty Em, I think she's going to be very pleased with the effect.'
She was, though still oddly businesslike about it all. Kate was up on the podium having her hem adjusted when Liz, Evie and Tayla rejoined them.
âI really do like this colour,' said Liz, doing a twirl in front of the mirror.
âI'm glad you approve,' said Emma, âbut I was having it anyway.'
Liz and Ellen glanced at each other. What was she so tetchy about?
âWhy are we just standing here, Mother?' Tayla whined, tugging on Evie's arm. âWe have to go, it's four o'clock already.'
Evie sighed. âIt's a sleepover, Tayla, you'll be there all night. Another half an hour is not going to make a difference.'
âBut everyone else was getting there at four!' she carped.
âHey Tayla,' Kate said, âyou know it's so not cool to be the first at a party. The coolest people arrive after everyone's there and make an entrance. And how many of your friends will be able to say they've been to get fitted for their bridesmaid dress?'
That got her thinking, and shut her up in the bargain. Evie mouthed a silent âThank you' to Kate. âStill, we better be on our way. Sorry we don't have more time. Haven't seen you all in a while.'
âHmm,' Liz agreed. âEverything okay?'
âYeah, busy, as always.'
âMo
therrr
!'
âOkay, bye everyone.'
âSo am I done now, too, Aunty Em?' Kate asked after they left in a flurry of hugs and kisses.
âYes, sure, you can go and get changed again.'
âGreat, thanks, I need to get going as well.'
âOh, okay,' said Ellen. âThe thing is, I drove Aunty Liz here, so if you can just wait till she's finished â'
âIt's all right, Mum. I'm meeting some friends in the city,' she said, stepping down off the podium.
âOh, you're not going back to your father's?'
âNo. Dad's got something on tonight anyway.'
Ellen felt a ripple of irritation down her spine. So Tim couldn't even rearrange his hectic new social life around one weekend a fortnight?
âWhat about Sam? What's he going to do?' she asked Kate.
âI don't know,' she shrugged.
As she disappeared behind the curtains, Ellen took out her phone and flipped it open. âI should ring and find out what's happening with Sam.'
âNo, you shouldn't,' said Liz, quickly snatching the phone from her.
Ellen blinked. âWhat are you doing?'
âSaving you from yourself,' she said. âSam is Tim's responsibility this weekend.'
âBut if he's not taking that responsibility seriously â'
ââ it's none of your concern,' Liz finished.
âShe's right,' Emma chimed in. She'd been circling Liz, pulling and tucking and adjusting the dress as she went.
Ellen regarded them both, crossing her arms. âYou know, they are my kids, I think I know what's best for them.'
âI'm sure you do,' Emma said, yanking Liz's straps in at the back so the bodice lifted. âBut they're Tim's kids too, so he gets to do what he thinks is best when they're with him.' She came around in front of Liz. âAh, there's your cleavage! I knew it had to be in there somewhere.'
Liz pulled a face.
âCan I have my phone back?' Ellen asked her.
âNot if you're going to call Tim,' said Liz.
âI'm not going to call Tim.'
âAre you going to call Sam?'
âAre you telling me now I can't call my own son?'
âI just don't think you should do it tonight, you'll only make yourself upset.'
âI'm already upset,' she returned. âNow I'll be worried about him all night as well.'
âHow about I buy you a drink when we're finished here?' said Liz. âTake your mind off it.'
Ellen gave a grudging shrug.
âWon't be much longer,' Emma said sharply. âWe just need to do your hem,' she added, helping Liz up onto the dais.
âThat's fine,' said Ellen. âNo hurry.'
âWell, I don't want to take up your time when you've obviously got other places to be.'
âWe're only going for a drink,' said Liz. âHave you got to be somewhere?'
âNo,' she said simply, glancing at her watch. âNot for hours anyway.'
âSo what's the big rush?' Liz persisted.
âI don't want to hold you up.'
âWould you stop saying that?' said Ellen. âWe only just decided to go and have a drink. It's not like we had big plans or anything.'
âWhy don't you come with us if you're not doing anything?' Liz suggested.
âThat's all right,' said Emma. âYou've already made your plans.'
âWhat plans? We just decided. Do you know any places we could go around here?'
âI know a few.'
âGood, then we can walk.'
âWill my car be all right? It's parked on the street,' said Ellen.
âOf course. Surry Hills isn't what it used to be,' said Emma.
âSo you'll come?' Liz asked her.
Emma hesitated for a moment, then the beginnings of a smile hovered around her lips. âOkay, then, I guess you talked me into it.'
âI think we should have champagne,' Liz announced, studying the wine list. âSeems appropriate â champagne to toast the champagne.'
Emma had led them up the street and around the corner into the next block, to quite a glam little bar that was decked out all retro style.
âSo you do like the colour?' said Emma, after Liz had ordered the champagne.
âI really do,' said Liz.
Ellen was nodding. âAnd it looks so good on everyone. How did you come up with it?'
âOh, it's all right,' she shrugged. âYou don't have to pretend to be interested.'
âBut I am interested.'
âI'm interested too,' said Liz. âYou haven't told us anything lately. You haven't sent any emails for a while either. Is everything okay?'
Emma glanced around, avoiding eye contact with either of them. âOh, well, I think I was a bit too concerned with pleasing everyone, and getting everyone's input. I needed to remember whose wedding it was and make a few decisions on my own.'
âWell, this one was a good one,' said Ellen. âI remember you said that once you had the colour, everything else would fall into place?'
âThat's right.'
âSo?' Liz prompted when she didn't elaborate. âTell us.'
âIt's okay, you don't have to act interested.'
âWould you stop saying that, Em?' said Liz. âYou've gone from the sublime to the ridiculous. Are we going to have to beg?'
That was all the encouragement she needed, and Emma launched into a lengthy description of her quest for the perfect bouquet. The waiter returned with the champagne and they toasted the bridesmaid dresses. Emma had moved on to menus by the time the waiter returned to top up their glasses.
âAnyway, that's enough about the wedding,' she said finally, sensing their interest flagging. âWhat's going on with you two?'
âWell, since you asked,' said Liz, âI'm toying with the idea of going back into surgery.'
âYou're kidding?' said Ellen.
âCan you do that?' asked Emma. âIs it possible?'
âProbably not,' she shrugged. âI'm probably having myself on.
I'm getting too old, I'd be competing for a place along with all the young guns straight out of medical school.'
âSo what's brought this on?' Ellen asked her.
âI always wanted to be a surgeon. The only thing I wanted to do more was have a family, so I took the safe option, a specialty with no emergencies, regular hours.'
âI didn't realise that,' Emma mused.
âSo much for being the brains of the family, eh?' said Liz with a lame smile.
âYou're still young enough to have a family,' said Ellen pointedly. âIf you put yourself out there.'
âAnd that's enough about me,' said Liz. âYour turn.'
Ellen glanced warily at them. âI'm thinking of applying for a job in a private school.'
Emma's eyes widened. âOoh, what will Mum and Dad have to say about that?'
âI know,' Ellen groaned. âThat's the only thing stopping me.'
âNonsense,' Liz declared. âThey coped when I went into private practice.'
âThat's because you can do no wrong,' returned Ellen. âYou're a
specialist
.' Emma chimed in on the word âspecialist'.
Liz stared at them. âOh that's crap. If anyone can do no wrong, it's you, Ellen.'
âWe'll see about that if I leave the public system.'
âSo you really are going for this job?' said Emma. âYou're not just thinking about it?'
âI don't know,' she sighed. âI don't know if I even want to go into the private system, but money's so tight at the moment, I have to do something. But it all feels too hard. You should see the application alone. And then if I actually get an interview, well, look at me. I just haven't had the time to fuss over myself lately. Look at my regrowth,' she said, dipping her head.
âI noticed,' said Emma.
âAnd I don't have anything decent to wear for an interview.'
âI can help you with all that,' said Emma.
âThanks Em, but I wouldn't fit into any of your clothes.'
âOf course not,' she dismissed, like it was a given. âI'm talking about taking you out shopping.'
âI can't afford it right now, Emma. That's why I need the job.'
âYou don't understand,' she persisted. âI have sources. I can take you direct to designers and probably find you samples. You'd be surprised how inexpensive they can be.'
âI'm sure I would be.' Surprised at what Emma would rate as inexpensive. âLook Emma, it's really nice of you, but I just can't be thinking of new clothes for myself now, with all the expenses for the wedding.'
Emma frowned. âWhat expenses do you have for the wedding?'
âKate's dress, and shoes, and well . . . everything.'
âBut you're not paying for any of that.'
âThat's really generous, Em, but I can't expect you to do that, and it isn't fair to everyone else â'
âWhat are you talking about?' said Emma. âI'm paying for every one else.'
âYou don't have to do that, I can afford it,' said Liz.
âThat's got nothing to do with it,' said Emma. âWhat planet are you girls from? The bride pays for her bridesmaids, that's basic etiquette.'
âI don't remember paying for yours,' Ellen mused.
âOf course you didn't â you were nineteen years old and we were all still living at home. Mum and Dad paid for everything.'
Ellen was frowning. âStill, I don't know . . .'
Emma waved her hand. âIt's already taken care of. You're not even going to know how much the dresses cost.'
âSeriously?'
âEnd of discussion,' Emma said firmly.
âWell, in that case, let's order another bottle of champagne,' Ellen declared happily. âOn me.'
âBetter make it on me,' said Liz, beckoning the waiter. âYou still have your car to pay for.'
âWhat happened to your car?' Emma asked.
âYou haven't heard?' said Ellen.
âNo one tells me anything.'
âSo that means you don't know about the hot mechanic, either,' Liz grinned.
âThere's a hot mechanic involved?' Emma exclaimed.
Ellen pulled a face. âOkay, exactly when did I ever say he was hot, Liz?'
âWell, is he?'
âI don't know,' she insisted. âI don't look at him that way, he's my mechanic.'