The Pull of Destiny (46 page)

Denise saw me first and a
derisive smile twisted her lips as she shook back her light brown hair.

“Oh my God, you actually made
it! We all thought you’d totally blow us off to go hang with Celsi Sawyer,” she
smirked, taking a sip from her Evian water bottle. Rolling my eyes, I sat down
next to her. She was Shane’s cousin, a member of our exclusive clique and as
such, one of the bitchiest students at Dalton. We usually got along just fine,
which says a lot about me, I guess.

Wendy glowered at me, her arms
wrapped around Ahmed’s neck. “He’s probably here to tell us he can’t come to
your birthday dinner tonight, Jake,” she said snidely. “He’s going to save the
AIDS orphans in Africa with Celsi Sawyer. For their Science project, you know.”

Ahmed snickered loudly,
clearly enjoying the roasting I was getting. “You know, for a guy who barely
shows up to class, you’re really dedicated to this “project” of yours,” he
said, making air quotes as he said ‘project’. “Sounds like Celsi must be
providing some private entertainment to keep you going back for more.”

I sighed, clenching my fists
in my hoodie pockets. If he said anything about CiCi and sex again, I would
straight deck him. And not because I wanted CiCi.

“If sex is all you think
about, you’re probably not getting any,” I told him coolly.

Denise giggled, glancing at a
red-faced Ahmed.

“What I want to know is how
you’re working on a Science project and I’m not. We
are
in the same
Science class, aren’t we?” Jake asked suddenly, tapping a finger against his
nose.

I shot Jake a wintry glare as
Wendy and Denise stared, eagerly awaiting my reply. Jake was a huge smartass,
always trying to prove me wrong! Dammit, I had completely forgotten he was in
my Science class. However, I had a quick answer for that. I’m an Astor. If
needed, I can lie at the drop of a hat.

“Extra credit, buddy. We
can’t all be geniuses.”

For some annoying reason,
everyone looked appeased by that, as if it was obvious that I needed extra
credit work to make it out of high school. I was glad they believed my lie, but
pretty pissed at the same time. Was that how everyone perceived me? It didn’t
feel that awesome.

“Okay, forget that for the
moment,” Denise said loudly, wiggling on the hard bench we were sharing. “So
you’re working on a project with Celsi. Why’d you bring her to the gala?”

“Because she’s helping me
with my project,” Ahmed said immediately in a sing-song voice. “I swear, the
girls got him whipped. She must have the good good.”

Wendy poked him in the
stomach and he let out a yelp of pain. “Shut up about her,” she growled
threateningly as Denise giggled harder.

Jake nodded. “That’s not a
valid reason. I’m sure there were plenty other girls more- fitting, shall we
say- to be your date. And you had to come up with Celsi Sawyer? I mean, she’s
cute, but she’s a nobody!”

I shrugged casually. “Why’d
you think I invited her, dumbass?” This was such a jerky thing to do, but I
felt like I had no choice. If these guys knew that CiCi and I were actually
friends…they wouldn’t like that at all. “You guys claim to be so smart, figure
it out.”

Wendy’s eyes widened as
understanding dawned on her heart shaped face. “You jerk!” She reached around
Denise, who flattened herself against me, and punched my shoulder hard. “You
took my advice without telling me?”

Jake looked from me to Wendy,
curiosity playing across his sharp features. “What advice?” he wanted to know,
as I prepared myself for the performance of a lifetime.

“I told him to take Celsi to
the gala as a mean joke but he was like ‘oh, you’re so evil, Wendy’! But you
actually did it?”

Clearly disbelieving, Denise
gave Wendy a rude head to toe look. “
You
suggested that idea?” she
asked.

Tossing her hair, Wendy said,
“Well, Joanna had
some
input. She wanted Luke to pull a Carrie on Celsi,
but he shot that idea down.”

“Do you expect us to believe
you invited Celsi to the gala as a mean joke?” Jake snorted.

“I didn’t invite her as a
joke,” I said scathingly. “I’m not 12 years old! Nope, it was purely
political.”

Ahmed was the first to get
it. I could almost feel the cogs turning in his head as his eyes lit up and I
grinned to myself. This was just too easy.

He snapped his fingers.
“Pissing off daddy dearest! Luke, you devious son of a bitch!”

Denise wrinkled her forehead
in thought. “I don’t get it.”

“What does Luke Astor Sr.
hate more than anything in the world?” Ahmed asked patiently.

Obvious question. Denise
seemed to think so too, as she pointed directly at me, a teasing grin on her
face. “You mean besides Luke Astor Jr.?”

Ahmed nodded. “Yeah, besides
Luke.”

“People with no money- oh!”

“It was pure genius, man.
Invite Celsi- you knew the grapevine was gonna talk about it. You are the man.”
Ahmed clapped slowly and deliberately.

“Yeah, well, it was a huge
mistake, inviting her.” Carelessly, I shrugged my shoulders. “I mean, she
thinks we’re tight now. She’s ben sticking to me like glue ever since I asked
her to the gala. God knows how I’m gonna get rid of her.”

“Doesn’t she realize you’ve
just been using her? Girls like that are so dumb. You flirt with her a little
bit, act real nice and they’ll do anything for you.” Ahmed sounded like he had
experience in that field and I didn’t press him. Keeping a straight face while
I spun the lies out was hard enough.

“So was your dad pissed when
he figured out she was broke?” Jake wanted to know.

I cringed, remembering the
tongue lashing I had received the day after the gala.

“Don’t ever pull a stunt like
that again! You knew how important that night was for my image! Why the hell
would you bring an unknown as your date? Do you know how many people were
talking about that, dumbass?”

And so on and so forth. Oh,
yeah. He was pissed, alright.

I nodded. “Yeah, he was. She
served her purpose. It’s getting rid of her that’s gonna be the problem.”

“You don’t have to worry
about that,” Wendy said, a movement over her shoulder catching her eye. “Little
Miss Eavesdropper heard everything.”

My heart skipped a beat as I
slowly turned, willing it to be one of Wendy’s mean jokes.

Unfortunately, luck wasn’t on
my side. CiCi and Robyn stood there, books in their hands. Apparently they had
been heading across the quad and something had made them pass right behind us,
leaving me screwed. Robyn looked furious, but CiCi- she looked hurt. I could
see tears welling up in her hazel eyes and I realized that my star turn as an
actor had been too believable, since she had fallen for it too.

Her fists clenched, Robyn
glowered at me. “You jerk! I can’t believe you used my best friend to get back
at your dad!”

I opened my mouth to reply,
the look on CiCi’s face
needing
an explanation, but Wendy beat me to it.
“Save your indignation for someone who cares.”

“And next time, don’t listen
in on other peoples conversations,” Jake chimed in snootily. “Didn’t your
mother teach you any manners?”

Ahmed laughed. “No.” He
pointed at CiCi, who was staring at me, a mixture of hurt and fury on her
pretty face. “Her mom abandoned her years ago.” I stared at Ahmed. What? CiCi’s
mom abandoned her? “I don’t know what Robyn’s excuse is, though.”

A tear rolled down CiCi’s cheek
as she finally spoke, her voice shaking. “Don’t you ever talk about my mom
again,” she hissed, her jaw working as she turned to look me in the eye. “And
don’t
you
ever talk to me again, you bastard. After everything I’ve done
for you!”

I stood up, reaching for her
involuntarily.

“Celsi….” My voice trailed
off as I remembered that my friends were watching eagerly and I couldn’t say
what I wanted to say, which was a huge sorry.

 I didn’t want her to
continue talking and spill my secret, even though she was well within her
rights to do so. I had completely messed up just to save my own skin. But I
really had no idea that she would overhear me talking about her. The old me
wouldn’t have cared, but the new me that knew CiCi as a friend- I knew I had
hurt her badly. And I couldn’t retract anything, not here, in front of my
friends. I still had to save face. So I just gave her a cocky eating grin,
spread my hands and said, “You had to find out that I was just using you
eventually,” in classic jerk mode. Then I sat down and waited for the shit to
hit the fan.

But CiCi didn’t continue
talking. She just gave me a disgusted look which chilled me, largely due to the
tears running down her face, and turned away.

“Let’s go, Robyn,” she said,
walking away with her back straight. Wendy and Denise’s mean laughter echoed in
the quad as I watched CiCi go, feeling like the biggest lowlife to ever walk
the Earth.

CHAPTER 19

colors of the
wind.

Celsi's Point of View.

Wendy and Denise’s laughter
still rang shrill in my ears as a livid Robyn followed me away from the quad. I
felt stupid, small, and pathetic. But above all, I felt used. All this time,
stupid little me had assumed that I’d found common ground with Luke, but he’d
obviously been laughing at me behind my back.
He seemed like he cared when
you told him about Rhea…. Because you were a pawn in his stupid scheme, that’s
why. He had to act like he cared.
It was painful for me to admit it but I
made myself face the fact- Luke had had an ulterior motive from the get go.

We found Shazia in the
library and as Robyn (almost foaming from the mouth, she was so pissed) told
her what had gone down, I valiantly played the part of the victim, right down
to the tears. I didn’t want to cry over Luke and his jerky treatment of me, but
I couldn’t help it. I’d lost someone I valued as a friend, and it hurt. All I
wanted was to go home, curl up on the sofa and wonder how I had misjudged Luke
so badly.
Am I too trusting?
Maybe I was naïve, always thinking the best
of people and assuming they wouldn’t hurt me. Most people in my life tried to
hurt me, why did I think Luke Astor would be different?

When I finally got home, the
hurt was slowly being replaced with anger and I had to admit, it felt good.
Nate wasn’t home, which meant that I didn’t have to tiptoe around the apartment
while he slept off his latest hangover.

Another rarity was the fact
that Aunt Kelly had the evening off, giving her the chance to unwind. She
needed it. I sank down into the loveseat next to the couch she was sitting on,
resting my head on the armrest. My heart tightened when I saw her wince as she
stretched her legs out on the worn couch, premature lines of age etched around
her mouth.
She’s working too hard.

 
And for what? Just so I could be another
‘girl with promise’ who falls through the cracks and becomes another statistic?
That was going to be my life, I could see it. Hardly anyone made it out of our
neighborhood intact, why did I think I would? Just because I went to a private
school, had rich friends and wanted to do something with my life didn’t make me
better than the people in my hood. I was fortunate, but in the end, I didn’t
think it would matter.
You have to make it matter.

Aunt Kelly’s voice cut into
my negative introspective thoughts, making me jump slightly.

“What’s wrong, sweetie?” she
asked, her warm hand covering mine and squeezing. The simple, loving gesture
made my eye’s brim and I blinked away the tears. I didn’t want to tell her.
She
doesn’t need to know about a stupid teen story like this.
But I opened my
mouth and found myself spilling out the whole story, starting from the homework
incident up to what happened today.

“He’s the one who approached
me, it’s not like I forced him to hang with me like he told his friends,” I
said, my voice cracking with rage. 

It was a long time before
Aunt Kelly replied. “I wish I could give you some amazing advice that you could
use to get over this situation,” she said softly. “But all I can tell you is to
steer clear of him. People like that- they’re more harm than good.”