The Prince of Neither Here Nor There (16 page)

“You seem pretty happy for a guy who’s lost his glasses and run into a tree,” Kim said, arms crossed.

Brendan realized he had a goofy expression on his face. He tried to settle down. “I dunno. Maybe I’m delirious.”

She looked at him critically. She changed the subject. “You were acting really strange last night.”

Brendan shrugged.
Wait a minute,
he thought.
Isn’t this convenient? She just happens to be here every time something weird goes down.
Aloud he said, “Yeah, I’m fine. Lucky you just happened to be there, huh. And you just happened to find me here. I guess I’m just lucky, huh?”

“Yeah, you’re lucky. You’re lucky I hang around you at all, dude.” She softened the words with a laugh. “Hop on.” Kim jerked a thumb over her shoulder. “We better motor if we want to be on time. Let’s find your goggles and get outta here.”

“Never mind,” Brendan said. When he saw her puzzled expression, he quickly said, “I’ve got a spare set at home and we’re late already.” He moved to the scooter before she could protest and swung his leg over it. He wrapped his arms around Kim’s waist. She throttled the scooter up and they sped away.

Brendan clung on for dear life as Kim swerved through the trees, the grip of the tires precarious on the dew-slicked grass. He tried to concentrate on the newfound acuity of his sight rather than her breakneck driving. He thrilled at the detail in the trees and leaves, the intricate patterns in the clouds. When they came to the road, Kim didn’t slow down, timing their arrival at the intersection perfectly with the changing of the lights. She shot through a crosswalk, weaving deftly among pedestrians and cyclists and skidding to a stop at the front steps of the school.

Brendan dismounted, his knees wobbling. “Thanks for not doing any wheelies.”

“No problem,” Kim said with a wink. “Next time!”

“Ooooo! Look at Brendan and his girlfriend.” The mocking voice of Chester Dallaire assaulted Brendan’s ears. “Or is it boyfriend? I can’t tell! She’s more like a guy than a girl!”

Chester sat on the steps with a pair of his cronies, Dean Spitz and Abdul Khun. They all shared an appreciation for the finer things in life: bullying, vandalism, and body odour.

“Like you’d know a real girl if she bit you on the butt, Chester.” Kim dismounted and rolled the scooter to the bike rack.

“Nice helmet, chrome dome.” Another round of guffaws. This was truly choice bully comedy.

“It takes so little to delight a tiny mind. C’mon, Brendan.” She walked straight up the steps past Brendan.

“Hey.” He pointed at the scooter. “Aren’t you gonna lock it?”

“I say it again: who would dare steal from me?” She glared pointedly at the three boys in front of her. They reluctantly slid out of her way and she climbed the steps. Brendan went after her. He reached the top step when he felt his foot catch on something. He sprawled on his hands and knees in front of the open doors of the school.

The laughter of Chester and his buddies swelled. Brendan angrily pushed himself to his feet and picked up his bag. He smouldered with anger. Chester did things like this to him every day. Today, he wasn’t in the mood. He’d really had enough of falling down and tripping and running into things. He turned around to glare at Chester. When Chester looked into Brendan’s face, the laughter died on his lips. Brendan felt as if Chester could see a darkness in his eyes, as if he didn’t look helpless or scared. He was furious and Chester was uneasy.

“Brendan,” Kim said, pulling at her friend’s arm. “Don’t bother with them.”

Brendan jerked free of her grasp. He stared Chester down. “That’s the last time I let you get away with anything, Chester.” He pointed at the bigger boy and spoke in a voice that he scarcely recognized himself. “Get lost!”

The instant the words were out of Brendan’s mouth Chester’s face went slack and his eyes became blank. His voice was totally flat as he said, “Right away.” He then turned and set off at a dead run. Abdul and Dean stared after him as he sped across the parking lot, turned up Avenue Road, and disappeared behind the Museum of Ceramic Arts. Abdul and Dean looked at Brendan, their faces filled with confusion and dread. Robbed of their leader, they shuffled up the stairs, keeping well away from Brendan as they hurried into the school.

Brendan was oblivious to their reaction. He shivered. He felt as though he’d just run a marathon. He reached out to grab Kim’s shoulder, slumping against her. “Wha …? What just happened?” Brendan felt a wave of exhaustion wash over him. He gripped Kim’s arm to stop himself from falling. “Whoa.”

“Just take a deep breath, Brendan. You’ll be okay.”

In a moment, Brendan was feeling better. He looked up to find Kim staring at him. “I can’t believe it,” she breathed.

“What can’t you believe?” Brendan asked.

“Do you know what you just did?” she hissed. “Do you have any idea?”

“I didn’t do anything,” Brendan said, confused. “All I did was tell him to get lost.”

“You really don’t understand.” Kim shook her head. “This is all happening too fast.”

Brendan was tired of the cryptic comments. He pointed an accusing finger at her. “That’s it. I’ve had it. I don’t get you. The more I think about you, the more I think you have some weird agenda.”

Kim didn’t say a word. She scanned the front of the school to see if anyone was watching.

“We’re going to have this out right now,” Brendan continued. “Either you tell me what’s going on or—”

“Or what?” She smirked at him.

Brendan couldn’t think of a good threat. He changed his tack. “I heard you talking to Greenleaf.”

Kim stiffened. “What are you talking about?”

“In the auditorium yesterday! I heard you talking about me.”

“Eavesdropping isn’t very polite,” Kim said quietly.

“Tell me what you were talking about,” Brendan demanded.

“I can’t do that,” Kim said.

The bell rang. Classes were starting. Neither of them moved. Class was forgotten.

“Well, maybe I should go and talk to Mr. Greenleaf.” Brendan started up the steps.

Kim stepped in front of him, blocking his way. “Oh, no you don’t!”

“Why not?” Brendan was secretly delighted that he’d hit a nerve. “What’s he going to tell me?”

Kim was about to respond when she was cut off by the harsh voice of Ms. Abernathy.

“What’s going on out here?” She stood in the open door of the school, glaring at the two truants. “The bell has rung. You are both late.”

Brendan froze. He had never been on the receiving end of a tongue-lashing by Ms. Abernathy. He had only watched others be dressed down by her. He tried to speak but all that came out was a strangled squeak.

“I asked you a question!” Ms. Abernathy barked. “What is going on out here?”

Brendan tried to clear his throat and make an excuse but Kim cut him off. “We’re having a private conversation.”

Brendan had never seen such an expression of complete shock on a human face before. Ms. Abernathy stared in disbelief. “No one speaks to me in that manner.”

“Well, I just did,” Kim said evenly. “Deal with it!”

Brendan thought the vice-principal was going to have a heart attack. Her face turned an interesting shade of puce. Her eyes bulged with outrage. “You … You … You …” the woman stammered.

“We’d like to finish our discussion so why don’t you run along,” Kim said. “Now!”

Ms. Abernathy quivered with rage. She reached out and grabbed Kim by the arm. “You are coming with me, young lady.”

Kim looked slowly down at the offending hand and then back into Ms. Abernathy’s eyes. “First of all, I am not young. Secondly, I am not a lady. Thirdly, take your hand off me if you ever plan on using it again.”

Ms. Abernathy’s mouth dropped open. She was about to speak but something in Kim’s eyes made her snap her mouth shut with a click. She let go of Kim.

“Better,” Kim said simply. A peal of thunder rolled across the sky. The three people on the steps looked up. The sky was clear. There was no imminent threat of rain, just a few white clouds drifting. The thunder rolled again.

“That’s odd,” Ms. Abernathy said softly.

“Uh-oh.” Kim’s voice was filled with dread. “This is gonna be bad.”

Brendan didn’t understand. He looked up into the sky again. Without any warning, a finger of lightning lashed downward from the empty sky, blasting into the middle of the sidewalk with a deafening bang. He was thrown from his feet, skidding along the steps and smacking into the metal railing. He tried to blink away purple spots from his eyes, the aftereffect of the lightning strike. When he could see again, he found himself staring at the most beautiful and terrifying woman he had ever seen.

She was tall and graceful, her long legs sheathed in black, tight-fitting leather trousers. She wore a bodice,
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brocaded with intricate lightning patterns. Her long, pale blond hair flowed over her shoulders in a wintry cascade. Her face … oh her face!

“So beautiful …” he breathed.

“Ah, nephew!” She smiled. Brendan’s heart shuddered. The sensation was like being smiled at by a hurricane. “At last we meet. They tried to hide you but I’ve found you at last.”

Kim had fallen on the steps beside Ms. Abernathy. She staggered to her feet. “He’s not for you, Orcadia.”

“Ki-Mata,” the woman said, chuckling. “You’re the best they could come up with? How sad.”

Brendan, still dazed, was trying to figure out what was happening. “Who are you?”

The woman smiled her ferocious smile. “I am your aunt Orcadia, my dear child. I’ve come to take you away from these weaklings. Together we have work to do. Together we are destined to do great things.” She took a step closer, and Brendan smelt ozone burning in the air around her. “Together we shall destroy the Humans and take our world back.”

Brendan cringed away from her outstretched hand. She pouted prettily. “Don’t be afraid. I don’t bite.”

“See here.” Ms. Abernathy stepped into Orcadia’s path. “You have no business being on the grounds of Robertson Davies Academy! You must leave at once.”

Brendan couldn’t believe his eyes. Ms. Abernathy was crotchety, mean, and annoying but he had to admit, she had guts. He felt he should warn the vice-principal that she was out of her depth but he was having enough trouble trying to stand up.

Orcadia looked at the vice-principal with a disdainful smile on her perfect face. “I’m not going to leave the grounds. But I’m afraid you are.” She lazily pointed a finger at Ms. Abernathy, and a jagged string of blue energy lanced out from her pale fingertip to engulf the hapless VP. Then, with a negligent flick of the wrist, Orcadia sent Ms. Abernathy cart-wheeling through the air to disappear over the edge of the roof.

Satisfied, Orcadia turned her attention to Brendan and Kim on the steps. “That was fun but I’m losing my patience. Brendan, come along.”

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Astigmatism
is a visual defect caused by the unequal curving of the refractive surfaces of the eye— usually the cornea, or lens of the eye. Astigmatism therefore makes wearing contact lenses impossible. Astigmatism is also difficult to spell. I like saying astigmatism. Astigmatism. Astigmatism. Astigmatism. Okay, I’m done ... astigmatism.

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 A
bodice
is a close-fitting, often laced-up top worn over a blouse. Very few people wear bodices any more: vampires, people who want to look like vampires, and the odd evil Faerie.

PURSUIT

Brendan looked into Orcadia’s face. Her eyes were icy blue. In fact, her skin had a tinge of azure underlying its pale chalk surface.

“I’m waiting,” Orcadia snapped.

“Orcadia, give it up,” Kim said.
“You
have no place here. Your actions threaten us all.”

“Shut up, you little fool,” Orcadia hissed. “You have no place here. He’s my nephew, son of my brother Briach Morn. Do not presume to tell me what to do, dung beetle!”

“Hey!” Brendan had suddenly found his tongue. “You tossed the vice-principal onto the roof!”

“Yes, I did.” Orcadia smiled. “Wasn’t it hilarious?”

“Hilarious?” Brendan was incredulous. “She might be dead!”

“Why should I care? Humans are like cockroaches, Breandan, they breed and breed. When you step on one, a hundred spring up to take its place,” Orcadia said. “Now, come with me. You needn’t live in this filthy world of Humans any more. There is a whole new world for you to explore.” She smiled again and held out an elegant hand to him.

In spite of his horror, Brendan found himself compelled to take that hand. There was something mesmerizing about her voice, something intoxicating about her beauty.

Still, something in his mind was repulsed by her.

“Cockroaches?” he said. “We aren’t cockroaches. Who do you think you are?” he managed to croak. “I don’t want to come with you. Why don’t you leave us alone?” He stepped away from her, taking his place beside Kim.

The woman laughed, a sound like the peal of bells in a dark cathedral. The sound pounded against Brendan’s skull, threatening to upset his precarious balance. He steeled himself not to act on the urge to fall to his knees. “It’s not polite to laugh at people,” he said, annoyed.

“Oh my.” The woman grinned, a fierce expression that held no mirth. Her teeth were a deep, startling blue. “That is so sweet! He thinks he has the right to comment on my manners. I, who was old with power at the quickening of the world, who was old when the People of Metal first cringed in their caves at the sound of the thunder. How dare you question my manners, whelp?”
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“Whelp?” Brendan said angrily. “I don’t even know what a whelp is but it doesn’t sound good to me. If you’re going to insult me, use words I can understand.”

The woman narrowed her eyes. “Ignorant little child! You dare to question me?” she thundered. She gnashed her teeth and bright blue sparks flared between them. She seemed to expand, to tower above Brendan. Her pale face twisted with rage. Even as his heart shrivelled in fear, Brendan felt a yearning. She was cold and beautiful like the glaciers he’d seen in Alaska on a cruise with his parents. She was poised above him, ready to crush him, grind him underfoot. He raised his eyes to the chips of flaring ice that were hers and waited to be destroyed.