The Perfect Mess (6 page)

Chapter 10

Landon sighed as he tossed his keys in the bowl on the counter and loosened his tie. He stopped by the fridge and grabbed a bottle of green tea on his way to his bedroom. He was pulling his undershirt over his head and he moaned as he took a deep breath. He leaned against the bathroom door and pressed his shirt to his face. He smelled like Ben. He’d used Ben’s soap, body wash and deodorant. And his clothes managed to absorb the warm citrus smell of Ben’s apartment.

Even if it wasn’t the worst idea ever, it would be too soon to call him,
Landon thought as he took one last whiff before tossing his shirt in the laundry basket. He quickly stripped off the rest of his clothes and went into his room and pulled a pair of gym shorts from the dresser. He stepped into them then cursed under his breath as he turned back to the bathroom. He snatched his undershirt from the basket and grumbled as he pulled it over his head as he went into his office. He squatted down and checked to make sure Keith had plenty of food and water. He scowled as Keith’s nose twitched inquisitively between the cage’s bars.

“No, you’re pathetic and might be planning to live in the same shirt for a week,” he said as he rose and went to his desk. He sighed heavily as he fell into his seat. He was tired but felt too anxious to take a nap. Landon grabbed a pencil and looked over the brief for his latest assignment and tried to clear his mind.

It didn’t work. Probably because he lifted the collar of his shirt above his nose and took a deep breath and could clearly see Ben naked and crawling over him. Which happened after Ben slowly stripped Landon naked and just before he covered every inch of Landon’s body with those incredible lips. Jesus Christ, those lips… Landon groaned as he bit the collar of his shirt. His eyes fell to the page and he dropped his pencil as he jumped to his feet. Landon pushed his hands through his hair as he stared at a far too lifelike pencil sketch of Ben’s lips.

“A drink,” he decided as he turned from the room. He nodded as he rushed through the living room and was reaching for a bottle of vodka on the kitchen counter when he paused. “No. You’ll get drunk and you’ll break down and call him. And he’ll think you’re an alcoholic because no one that isn’t drinks as much as they did last night and then gets drunk again at noon the next day.” Landon rubbed the back of his neck as he began to pace. “A movie. Watch a movie. You won’t be tempted to call him if you’re distracted by a movie,” he said as he walked into the living room.

A knock at the door made him jump. He frowned as he strode across the room. Landon pressed his eye to the hole then his head pulled back. He shook his head in disbelief then looked again. Ben was definitely on the other side of the door. Landon pressed his hands and forehead against the wood and chewed his lip as he debated. He really, really wanted to see and smell and hear Ben but he knew that he’d want to touch and taste Ben and that would lead to fucking Ben. Which would only make things more complicated. There was another knock and Landon lightly beat his head against the wood before he unlocked the door. He took a deep breath and pulled it open.

“Hey!” Landon acted surprised when Ben’s eyes met his and he smiled. Ben held up Landon’s coat.

“You left this,” he said and Landon rolled his eyes as he took it from Ben.

“My mom always said I’d lose my ass if it wasn’t attached to the top of my legs,” he said as he stepped aside and waved for Ben to come in. He
had
to let him in. He couldn’t just send him on his way. That would be rude. He shut the door and Ben’s soft chuckle spilled through Landon leaving warmth in its wake.

“It would be a shame to lose that,” Ben said as he walked into the living room. “This is a great building and I love what you’ve done in here,” he said as he turned and surveyed the room. Landon wasn’t sure why but his feet carried him to Ben and his hand reached out and slid around Ben’s neck.

“Thanks for bringing this,” he murmured as his lips brushed against Ben’s. Ben’s fingers trailed down Landon’s neck and he hummed softly as their lips clung.

“I was afraid it was too soon. I asked Jason but I think he’s going to be busy for the rest of the weekend,” Ben explained and Landon shrugged.

“It’s fine. I was thinking about calling you,” he said. It wasn’t a total lie. “I’m going to go hang this up, make yourself at home,” Landon said as he stepped back. His hand slid down Ben’s chest, prolonging their contact. He shook his head as he stepped out of reach.
You are completely fucking helpless,
he complained as he turned and went down the hall.

“Did you paint this?” Ben asked from the living room as Landon walked into his closet.

“The painting over the couch?” Landon asked.

“Yeah,” Ben said and Landon laughed as he grabbed a hanger.

“No. A man named Van Gogh painted that, it’s a reproduction,” Landon said as he hung his coat. He checked the pockets and pulled out the tin of mints and his sunglasses. He popped a mint in his mouth as he set them on the dresser.

“Is this Keith?” Ben asked and Landon grinned as he walked into the office. His grin faded as his eyes locked on Ben’s ass. He was bent over, staring into Keith’s cage. Landon shook his head to clear it.

“That’s Keith,” he said as he stood next to Ben. Ben stood and his eyes swept around the room.

“You work here?” He asked and Landon nodded. Ben’s eyes went to the desk. “Can I see some of your work?” He stepped toward the desk and Landon was about to show him his most recent brief when his eyes went to the last thing he’d drawn.

“Sure! Let me show you my portfolio,” Landon said as he rushed past Ben. He pulled it from the shelf and dropped it on top of his desk. Once the drawing of Ben’s lips was covered, Landon relaxed as he flipped open his portfolio. Ben grinned as he turned the pages.

“Obviously, I know absolutely nothing about art but I think your work is incredible, Landon,” Ben said. Landon felt a flutter of giddy joy. For a moment, Ben’s eyes clouded and the corner of his lips tilted down. Landon was about to ask if he was ok when Ben smiled and reached for Landon. “Did you have any plans? Or can I take you out for lunch?” Ben asked and Landon pulled his lips tight as he considered. He was really tired and now that Ben was close, he felt oddly calm and exhausted. He shook his head and Ben’s brows dropped.

“I’m drained and I was kind of looking forward to being lazy today,” he admitted. “I was about to watch a movie when you came,” Landon said and Ben nodded as he stepped back.

“Right. I’m sorry, I should have called first,” he took a step toward the door. “I’ll let you get back to your movie,” Ben mumbled and Landon grabbed his arm. He smiled as his eyes slid down Ben’s grey gingham shirt, jeans and loafers.

“You’re a little overdressed but I’d love it if you stayed,” Landon said and Ben nodded.

“Ok,” he said as he pulled Landon into his arms. “But if you’re suggesting I take off my clothes, I don’t think we’re going to get to the movie,” Ben warned and Landon’s lips twitched as he tried not laugh.

“Come with me,” he said as he towed Ben toward the door.

He pulled Ben into his bedroom and Ben’s brows rose. Landon rolled his eyes as he pushed Ben to the dresser. He found his largest pair of pajama pants and one of his larger t-shirts and presented them to Ben who blinked rapidly as he stared at the clothes before he looked at Landon.

“You want me to wear your clothes?” He asked and Landon nodded and pointed at the bathroom.

“Go change,” he commanded and Ben looked stunned as he turned toward the bathroom. Landon shook his head at Ben’s expression as he shut the door. Landon’s stomach growled and he pressed his hand to it. “I’m starving. Want to order some pizza?”

“Ok,” Ben mumbled distractedly from the other side of the door and Landon frowned.

“Do you like pizza?” He asked.

“I love pizza,” Ben said and it was almost robotic, it was so flat. Landon went to the door and leaned against the frame.

“Is something wrong?” Landon asked. The door swung open and Ben jumped when he found himself face to face with Landon. Landon raised a brow before he tilted his head and checked Ben’s ensemble.

“I’m wearing your pajamas,” Ben murmured and Landon nodded in agreement.

“Everything fits pretty good. You’re not that much taller or bigger than me,” he said and Ben leaned and his shoulder rested next to Landon’s.

“I’m wearing your pajamas,” Ben repeated and Landon nodded again.

“Yes, you are,” he said and Ben sighed.

“Maybe I’m a little old fashioned or I’m reading into it a bit too much but this is kind of intimate, if you think about it,” he said and Landon touched his forehead to Ben’s and pecked at his lips.

“We’ve actually been intimate, so this is ok,” he whispered and Ben snorted.

“Not like that. I mean, personal.
You
slept in these. They smell like you. And you want me to lounge around in them. It feels a little like…” He floundered for a minute and the breath caught in Landon’s throat.
Something a boyfriend would do,
he realized. Ben nodded. “The sort of thing we’d do if we were in a relationship,” Ben said and Landon exhaled loudly.

“Do you want to change?” He asked softly and Ben shook his head.

“No!” He said and Landon was both thrilled and a little panicked. Ben tipped his head back so that his lips rubbed against Landon’s. “I love how these feel but I don’t love how they make me feel, if that makes sense,” he said softly and Landon’s chest felt tight.

“I’m wearing this shirt because it smells like you,” he admitted and Ben shut his eyes.

“What are we doing?” Ben groaned as he pulled Landon against him. Landon took a ragged breath as he fisted his hands in the back of Ben’s (his) t-shirt.

“I don’t know. One minute I’m the happiest I’ve been in as long as I can remember and I’m so turned on and fascinated by you. And the next, I’m scared that I’m making a terrible mistake and I’m going to hurt you. And myself.” Landon breathed the words into the corner of Ben’s neck. He felt Ben nod.

“I’m so happy for you. I know this job is your dream but I get the feeling that it’s going to turn out to be one of the greatest tragedies of my life,” he whispered as his hands roamed Landon’s back. “But I don’t want to stop. I want to keep being near you and I think I want every moment that I can get because I know I’m going to miss you and I’ll wish that I had just a few more moments,” Ben said and Landon’s stomach flipped anxiously and the tightness in his chest became painful.

“I know,” he rasped. Ben’s hand slid into Landon’s hair and he held him tighter.

“It’s not fair. If we take it slow, we’ll be wasting time and not making the most of it. If we go fast and get carried away, we’re going to get emotionally involved and it’s going to hurt like hell,” Ben complained. Landon raised his head and searched Ben’s face.

“We’re going to have regrets either way but what would you regret the most?” He asked and Ben’s eyes poured into Landon’s.

“Not making the most of it. Even if all of the memories break my heart, I’d rather have them than wonder what it would have been like,” Ben said firmly and the tightness in Landon’s chest started to ease. There might be more pain later but they’d have something to show for it. He pressed his lips to Ben’s and smiled when he leaned back and looked into Ben’s eyes.

“And we get to have a lot more sex if we don’t take it slow,” he added and Ben’s hand curved over Landon’s ass as he laughed.

“That’s actually why I came over,” Ben admitted and Landon pulled his head back in surprise.

“That was pretty cocky,” he said and Ben shook his head.

“It was Jason,” he said and Landon’s brows rose. Ben tightened his grip on Landon’s ass and pulled him against his groin. Landon’s eyes flared as their erections pressed against each other. “He told me that you’d want me to sweep you off your feet and do filthy things to you. And that you’ve had a dry spell and were due for something filthy,” Ben explained and Landon bit back a moan.

“Yeah. All of that,” Landon said hoarsely. “Remind me to send him a gift, to thank him,” he said and Ben nodded as his hand slid around Landon’s jaw.

“I’ll go in on it with you, what did you have in mind?” Ben asked and Landon hummed thoughtfully as he tugged at Ben’s lower lip.

“I’m feeling really, really grateful at the moment. Maybe a car,” he said and Ben laughed.

“That’s really flattering,” Ben decided and Landon smiled.

“You should be flattered, the sex was amazing,” Landon said and Ben’s cheeks were tinted pink.

“It was,” Ben murmured as his lips pecked at Landon’s. “Do you want to…” His head jerked toward the bed. “Before we eat and watch movies?” He asked and Landon was about to say yes when his stomach growled loudly. Ben’s eyes went to the source of the noise and Landon cringed.

“I’m so tempted to say yes but I haven’t eaten all day and we should probably try to rest a little before we wear each other out again,” he said and Ben grinned as he stepped back and turned Landon toward the hall. Landon sighed happily as he reached behind him for Ben’s hand. “As awesome as your bed was, I don’t sleep well when I’m not in my bed. Between the sex and the tossing and turning, I only got a few hours,” Landon announced as they went into the living room. Ben made a sympathetic sound as Landon reached for his phone.

“I’m sorry, I didn’t notice,” he said. “I can fall asleep almost instantly just about anywhere,” Ben said as he watched Landon swipe through the contacts on his phone. He stopped and smiled at Ben.

“So, sleepovers at my place?” He asked and Ben nodded. “Yes!” Landon cheered and pressed a quick kiss to Ben’s lips. “Are you ok with Ginelli’s?” He asked and Ben snorted.

“Umm… Where else would you order pizza from?” He asked incredulously and Landon pressed his hand against his heart.

“You have no idea how much that means to me,” he said dramatically and Ben covered Landon’s hand with his and looked at him with mock tenderness and made his lip tremble.

“Pepperoni and mushrooms?” He whispered and Landon’s eyes grew wide.

“And extra cheese?” He made his voice waver and Ben pulled him close and rocked from side to side.