The Natural History of Us (28 page)

“I know.” She steps out of his arms and folds hers tight across her chest. “But if you or Faith or Mama saw me fail again… I couldn't deal with that. Too much is riding on this. I had to do it on my own.”

“But you didn't.” He presses his lips together, then lifts his hand as he accuses, “You turned to him.”

Peyton's eyes blow wide. “No, I didn't!” She moves like she's gonna take his hand, then thinks better of it, and rubs her palms down her thighs. “I swear, Cade, it wasn't like that at all. Justin asked how the barrel riding was going, and when I told him about my epic fail the other day, he…”

“He volunteered,” I finish for her, my jaw aching from clenching. He's doing it again. Taking a moment that should be awesome, about
her
, and making it about himself. “I'd think
you'd be happy for her. What she did today was incredible and, I don't know, maybe I'm wrong, but I think that's what's important. Not who was here to watch.”

I shrug, innocent as can be, knowing as I do that I'm driving him bat-shit crazy.

Peyton bites out a warning, “
Justin
…”

“No,” Cade says, “he's right.”

Releasing a sigh, he removes his glasses and pinches the bridge of his nose. I almost feel for the guy. When he replaces them, a heavy look of defeat coats his expression, and a hum of victory buzzes beneath my skin.

“I'm sorry, CC. I'm being a jealous ass,” he admits, reaching out and taking her hand. “But that's on me, not you. It doesn't matter who was here to help, just that you did it, and I'm proud of you. Really.”

Damn. This is
not
how I saw this going.

“I guess I just don't understand why he's here,” Cade continues, offering her an “aww, shucks” grin. “Shouldn't he be out on a diamond somewhere?”

“
He
can hear you,” I grit out, “and I'm benched for a week.” I wave my slung elbow like a stupid flag and go for the joke. “Apparently, my head's not as hard as we thought.”

The truth is, my head was in a fog the first two days, and my sleep has been shit. Concussions suck and it's made my life miserable. But today… today made it all worth it. If it brings Peyton back to life, I'll gladly get knocked on my ass every game.

Peyton frowns at my sling. “He stopped by to go over our project, and when we were done, he suggested I try a different approach on the course. It ended up working.”

We both know it was more than a new outlook. Peyton succeeded because she was born to ride, her instincts are strong, and because we worked together, just like we used to. But I won't push it. I've already gotten my win for the day.

Cade huffs a laugh under his breath. Then, shaking his head like what he's about to do is against his own better judgement, he holds out a hand. “Well, then I guess I should say thanks. Peyton belongs in that ring. I'm grateful you helped her find her way back there.”

Like an idiot, I stare at his extended appendage for a few more beats before accepting it.

Our handshake is awkward as hell, not only because I'm forced to use the wrong hand, and as we lock eyes, we hold an entire conversation in a glance.

Thanks for helping… but she's still my girlfriend
.

You're welcome… and not for long
.

Cade drops the act and shoves his hand back into his jeans pocket. “So, when does this assignment end anyway? Isn't graduation in a week?”

“Uh, this is the last week,” Peyton says, staring at the patch of air where we shook hands. A strange squiggle forms between her eyebrows. “Today wrapped up the marriage unit—”

“And tomorrow we become parents,” I finish for her, wanting to get a rise out of Cade.

But, as soon as the words leave my mouth, I realize my mistake.

Instead of Cade flushing in a jealous rage, Peyton's fair skin turns ghost white. Her shoulders bow like she's been hit, and a strangled sound emits from her throat.

I bite back a curse as memories assault me. How can I be so stupid? Cade narrows his eyes, like he's not sure why he should lay into me, but he's ready to do it anyway—and he should. He damn well should. Because while I don't know what he knows, or even
if
he knows, what I just said was heartless.

I want to drop to my knees. I want to curse my stupid mouth and tell her I didn't mean it. But if Peyton hasn't told Cade anything, I can't. I can't make this worse than it already is.

When Peyton speaks again, her voice is small. “Coach Stasi gave us a budget spreadsheet.” She forces a smile, pretending like I haven't gutted her, and I stare a hole in the side of her cheek. “Tomorrow we have to meet at Walmart and price out baby items, then extrapolate that over a year.” She makes a face and laughs a little. “Your math nerd brain would be in hog heaven.”

Cade laughs at that, a real laugh this time, and I watch as they share a small smile. It's worse than yelling at me or showing me how much I hurt her. She's ignoring me. Desperate to turn the tide and interrupt their bonding moment, I stupidly say:

“Nothing says romance like a date at Walmart.”

Are you shitting me? That's what you come up with?

It's amazing I've gotten any women at all.

Shockingly, my dumbass comment does the trick. The goo-goo eyes stop and Cade shoots me a look like he'd forgotten I was even here. Fat chance. Peyton scratches her elbow. “We pick up our electronic baby Friday morning and have to keep it for the weekend.”

And that reminds me of the other reason I stopped by.

Grateful for the shift in subject, I go for my best panty-melting grin and say, “Oh, hey, I almost forgot. A bunch of us are going out to the beach house this weekend. A weekend-long baby-shower–slash-misery-loves-company kind of deal.” I glance at Cade, including him in the invite with strong,
strong
reluctance. “You're both welcome to come along.”

Friday's a school holiday, a teacher in-service or some bullshit, so we have a three-day weekend once we pick up our babies from Coach Stasi. Which means I'll have close to sixty hours with Peyton if she agrees. Anything can happen with that much time. This is my last shot, so I'm holding out for a miracle here, even if Cade
does
tag along.

Besides, I have a few tricks up my sleeve.

“What do you say?”

Peyton hesitates. “Well… it
would
be easier if we're both there with the baby.” She turns to Cade and explains. “We're supposed to share responsibility. The babies will be programmed to shut down sometime Sunday, which leaves us just enough time to get over sleep deprivation before exams on Wednesday.” She sighs, like she's already exhausted thinking of it, and adds, “If a bunch of us go through it together, it might suck less.”

I try not to show how much this means to me, but it's so damn hard.

Then she says, “While we're in Galveston, we can also stop by Pleasure Pier.”

This is directed at Cade, and an underlying tone in her voice tempers my excitement. From the way he's smiling, I know I'll regret asking... but I do it anyway. “Pleasure Pier?”

“It's our spot,” he replies, tucking Peyton against his side. “It's where I took her for our first official date.”

Well fuck my life.

Why can't anything ever be easy? Just one small thing? I'm working my ass off here, trying to win back the girl I'm in love with and atone for my horrible mistakes of the past, and just when I think I'm finally catching a break, shit like this happens.

Cade brushes a lock of Peyton's golden hair aside and whispers something in her ear, looking like he thinks he's won. But I hold tight to what I know:

Cade Donovan may be a good guy, but he doesn't know Peyton like I do. He doesn't challenge her. He doesn't see through the mask she shows the world that hides the scared yet resilient heart beneath. He couldn't, or she wouldn't be doubting herself so much. She'd know how amazing she is. That she can do anything because she's strong, stronger than
anyone I've ever met. And because she'd be hearing it every damn day.

Everyone knows I'm not good for much, but I was made to love this girl. I'm good for her and I'm good
with
her. It may've taken me three years to fully realize that, but I know it now.

Soon, she will, too.

“I'll have to rearrange some things back home,” Cade says, his cocky grin implying that this is over. That the weekend will be some kind of romantic weekend escape for two. He should know better than to doubt me by now. “But, sure. We're in.”

Peyton smiles, although it doesn't quite reach her eyes. Those beautiful peepers are swirling with curiosity and a dash of apprehension. And rightly so.

Horse boy has no clue what he's up against.

When
we get to the Carters' beach house, Cade makes a scoffing sound in his throat. It grates on my nerves, but I can't really blame him. It's the biggest one on the block, not that I expected any less, and of course it's smack dab in the middle of the ritziest section of Galveston.

But see, Cade is only looking at the surface.

Sure, colorful flowers line the drive, providing the perfect contrast to the mansion's stereotypical all-white façade. A wraparound terrace and fancy gazebo add that touch of southern sweetness and sophistication. The whole shebang screams money and entitlement and everything I've come to associate with Mitch and Annabeth Carter.

But I've peeked behind their oh-so-perfect curtain. I know the danger of judging a book by its cover. So as I set my sandal on the flawless, paved driveway, and stare up, up,
up
to the top of the house, all I can think is that it feels lonely.

How sad must it have been to vacation here as a kid? My parents never had a lot of money, even before my insane
medical bills, but they always filled my summers with sticky treats and pure silliness. Justin's beach house is the
opposite
of silly. It's pristine, enormous, and lacking any trace of true comfort. It makes me hurt for the little boy he once was.

“Nice place,” Cade says. Sea gulls squawk overhead and waves crash against the shore behind the house, but his sarcasm is unmistakable. “Think it's big enough?”

Somehow, I withhold my groan.
Is it Sunday yet
?

The trip only just began, yet it already seems to be dragging. The ride down felt like it took days instead of a couple hours. Cade's constant snide little digs at Justin made my molars ache.

News flash? I don't need reminders of how badly he hurt me in the past. Every second I spent with Justin, every up and down, is seared into my memory.
Cade's
the one that doesn't know all the details.

But, I understand.

Even before my ex steamrolled his way into my relationship, Cade and I hadn't clicked in a while. Not like we did in the beginning. The very things I loved and found refreshing in the beginning now started to irk. His response to the honeymoon question was a perfect example of that. But, that's Cade. It's not fair to suddenly change the rules on him when he's been consistent and loyal the whole time.

That's why we're here, or at least it's one of the reasons. My hope was that if we got away from the stress of the ranch, snuggled on the beach, and reconnected at the Pier, that we'd rekindle the feelings of last summer. Relive the incredible memories we made together.

Unfortunately, my stellar plan isn't turning out so stellar.

“It's gorgeous,” I agree with a tight smile, choosing to take his words at face value. New plan? Distract, distract, distract. Lowering my voice to a flirtatious level, I bump my shoulder against his and ask, “You know what the best part is?”

Cade shifts his gaze from the four-story home. “What's that?”