The Name of This Book Is Secret (28 page)

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Authors: Pseudonymous Bosch

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Clem
—A fight with the locals.

Jump
—The jump is the distance a circus or carnival travels between performances.

Mark
—An audience member—i.e., a sucker.

Mentalist act
—A mind-reading routine like the Bergamo Brothers’.

Midway
—The area between—midway, get it?— the circus exit and the entrance to the Big Top. This is where the sideshow stalls and concessions are lined up.

Roustabout
—A laborer in the circus. Also a fun word to say.

Rube
—A rube is exactly what you are if you don’t know the word
rube
. In other words, a dupe. A townie or other circus newbie.

Shill
—Shills work for the circus but they pretend to be ordinary customers impressed by the sideshow acts—so that other customers get excited enough to cough up their money. Think of parents at a school performance. You know how they always clap really loudly, even when their kids sing out of key or flub their lines? Parents are terrible shills.

Slum
—The useless stuff you buy from a circus vendor, like teddy bears and plaster statuettes. Otherwise known as toys and prizes.

Swag
—See slum.

Tip
—Audience or crowd. “
Turning the tip
” means getting the crowd to pay to enter a show.

With it
—Hip to the carnival scene. A carny. You’re either with it—or you’re not.

Keyword Codes

The secret letter Cass and Max-Ernest received from the Terces Society was encrypted with a keyword code. If you want to try encrypting or decrypting a letter with a keyword code yourself, here’s how:

In a keyword code, the first letters of the alphabet are replaced by a secret word. For instance, if TERCES is your keyword, A is replaced by T, B by E, C by R, D by C, and E by S. (You skip the second E in TERCES because you can’t repeat letters.) After the letters of the keyword, the alphabet proceeds normally—minus the letters that have already been established. Therefore, in this case, F is replaced by A, and G by B. H, however, is not replaced by C, because you’ve already used C for D; instead, H is replaced by D.

In the end, your code looks like this...Or rather,
YLUO RLCS ILLHP IFHS QDFP:

A Personal Recommendation

Those readers whose knowledge of Egyptology is as shamefully deficient as Cassandra’s could do worse than to pick up a copy of
The Egyptian Book of the Dead,
also known as
The Papyrus of Ani.
A guide to the next world, it includes many important spells and instructions for success in the afterlife—a useful introduction to ancient Egyptian life aboveground as well!

The Bergamo Brothers’ Card Trick

This is one of the card tricks that the Bergamo Brothers performed when they were first learning magic. Of course, they performed it on the deck of a ship, and with a real deck of cards, but you’ll get the idea.

Choose one of the six cards below and think about it really hard.

Now, keep thinking about it as you flip to the next page. All the cards will appear again—except the one you’re thinking about.

Your card isn’t here, is it?

Think it was just a coincidence? Try again. Go back to the last page, choose a different card, and think about that card. Then return to this page and see if it’s here....

Want to try the trick on someone else? Hand this book to them and make them choose a card. Better yet, forget the book. Grab a deck of cards and put on a show.

If you haven’t yet figured out the secret, I’ll tell you how the trick is done. But remember, the first rule of being a magician is not to give away your tricks. So don’t let anyone else in on it, no matter how much they beg or plead or threaten you.

What you’ll need: a deck of cards and a top hat. (A cowboy hat also works. A baseball hat?—not so much. Think
style.
)

Before your audience arrives:

Separate all the face cards from the deck.

Then divide the face cards into two groups of six cards each.

Each group of six should include: one black king and one red king, one black queen and one red queen, one red jack and one black jack.

Remove a card from one of the groups and return it to the original deck. You now have one group of five cards and one group of six cards.

Hide the group of five cards in your hat. If there is a ribbon around the inside of the hat, try sticking them under the ribbon. That way you can wear the hat without disturbing the cards.

Spread the other six cards faceup on a table.

You’re now ready to begin.

Tell someone in your audience, preferably a sibling whom you want to annoy, to choose one of the cards on the table. Tell this person not to say the name of the card aloud. Instead, he or she should simply think about the card—really hard.

If you’re wearing your hat, take it off—being very careful not to let the hidden cards fall out. Then pick up the cards off the table and put them in your hat, too. Be sure to keep the two sets of cards separate.

After a suitable magical interlude in which you pretend to concentrate on the cards, and perhaps even put the hat back on, remove the hidden group of cards (the group with only five cards) and arrange them in front of you.

Ask your victim, that is, your audience member, if his or her card is on the table.

None of the original cards will be there—because they’re in your hat. But your audience will think that only the one card is missing.

Et voilà!

THE END

REALLY.

 

*
F
OR
G
RANDPA
L
ARRY’S COMPASS RECIPE, TURN TO THE APPENDIX
. T
HAT’S AT THE END OF THE BOOK, BY THE WAY, NOT IN YOUR BODY
.
(back to text)

 

*
A
RT
N
OUVEAU MEANS

NEW ART

IN
F
RENCH, BUT AS YOU CAN SEE FROM THE BOX IT’S ACTUALLY A VERY OLD STYLE
. I
F YOU EVER GO TO
P
ARIS, AND
I
HOPE YOU DO, YOU WILL NOTICE THAT SOME OF THE METRO ENTRANCES ARE MADE TO LOOK LIKE VINES GROWING OUT OF THE SIDEWALK

AN
A
RT
N
OUVEAU JUNGLE
.
(back to text)

 

*
N
OBODY KNEW HOW THESE RATINGS HAD BEEN ESTABLISHED
;
THEY WERE SIMPLY FACTS, LIKE GRAVITY OR
M
RS
. J
OHNSON’S HATS
.
(back to text)

 

*
W
HY WAS THE
S
YMPHONY OF
S
MELLS IN HER BACKPACK AND NOT IN THE SHOP WHERE IT BELONGED
? I’
M AFRAID
I
CAN’T EXPLAIN WITHOUT PUTTING
C
ASS IN A RATHER NEGATIVE LIGHT
. B
UT

HYPOTHETICALLY

WOULD IT BE SUCH A BAD THING TO TAKE IT IF SHE REALLY THOUGHT SHE WAS SAVING LIVES
?
(back to text)

 

*
I
CAN’T SAY
I
AGREE WITH
C
ASS’S REASONING, MORALLY SPEAKING
. O
N THE OTHER HAND, MIXING SOME TRUTH INTO A LIE IS ALWAYS AN EFFECTIVE TECHNIQUE
.
(back to text)

 

*
W
HICH IS EXACTLY WHAT SHE SHOULD HAVE DONE
. A
ND WHAT YOU AND
I
SHOULD DO IF WE EVER FIND OURSELVES IN HER SITUATION
.
(back to text)

 

*
S
HOULD SHE HAVE CONFESSED ALL
? I
WILL LET YOU, READER, BE THE JUDGE

AS EXPERIENCED AS
I
KNOW YOU ARE AT PLOTTING AND SCHEMING AND GETTING IN AND OUT OF SCRAPES
. G
ROWN-UPS CAN BE USEFUL AT TIMES

MONEY AND CAR RIDES COME TO MIND
. B
UT THEY ALSO HAVE A HABIT OF GETTING IN THE WAY WHEN YOU WANT TO DO SOMETHING THEY DON’T APPROVE OF
.
(back to text)

 

*
T
HIS TERRIBLE MAN WAS THE
I
TALIAN DICTATOR
B
ENITO
M
USSOLINI
. A
S A CHILD
, M
USSOLINI WAS EXPELLED FROM SCHOOL FOR STABBING ANOTHER STUDENT AND FOR THROWING A POT OF INK AT HIS TEACHER
. H
IS PERSONALITY NEVER IMPROVED BUT HIS LUCK SURE DID
. H
E WENT ON TO RULE
I
TALY WITH AN

IRON FIST
,”
MAKING EVERYONE IN THE COUNTRY

INCLUDING ALL THE TEACHERS

SWEAR THEIR LOYALTY AND OBEY HIM WITHOUT QUESTION
. A
LITTLE-KNOWN FACT ABOUT
M
USSOLINI IS THAT HE WAS ALSO A NOVELIST
. T
O ME, THIS MAKES PERFECT SENSE
. T
HE WRITER OF A NOVEL IS LIKE THE DICTATOR OF THE NOVEL
;
HE MAKES ALL HIS CHARACTERS DO EXACTLY WHAT HE WANTS THEM TO DO, AND SAY EXACTLY WHAT HE WANTS THEM TO SAY
. B
UT PLEASE DON’T DRAW ANY CONCLUSIONS ABOUT THE KIND OF PEOPLE WHO WRITE NOVELS
. A
FTER ALL, NOT ALL NOVELISTS ARE POWER-HUNGRY MADMEN

SOME ARE POWER-HUNGRY MADWOMEN
.
(back to text)

 

**
C
IRCUS PEOPLE HAVE A LANGUAGE ALL THEIR OWN
. I’
VE COLLECTED A FEW WORDS IN THE APPENDIX

JUST IN CASE YOU DECIDE TO RUN AWAY AND JOIN THE CIRCUS YOURSELF
.
(back to text)

 

*
I
F YOU WANT TO KNOW HOW TO PRONOUNCE SYNESTHESIA, IT SOUNDS LIKE ANESTHESIA, BUT WITH SIN AT THE BEGINNING
.
(back to text)

 

*
S
EEING LETTERS IN COLOR IS SOMETIMES CALLED AUDITION COLOR
é
E

COLORED HEARING
.
(back to text)

 

*
I
SAY SEEM ALL THE MORE ANCIENT, BEAUTIFUL, AND SECRET, BECAUSE IN REALITY THE
M
IDNIGHT
S
UN WAS NOT ANCIENT BUT MERELY OLD
;
THE DOINGS INSIDE, AS YOU SHALL SOON SEE, WERE ANYTHING BUT BEAUTIFUL
;
AND, LASTLY, NOW THAT
I
AM WRITING ABOUT IT, THE
M
IDNIGHT
S
UN IS SOMEWHAT LESS OF A SECRET
.
(back to text)

 

*
A
S IT HAPPENS, SHE WAS RIGHT
;
IT WAS A SOLARIUM

ALBEIT A UNIQUE ONE
.
(back to text)

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