The Mechanical Messiah (43 page)

A tall man with a greying head knocked upon Cameron’s door.

Bolts were drawn, the door opened. ‘Good morning, Colonel,’ said Cameron Bell.

‘Impressive constitution,’ said the colonel, viewing the vigorous figure before him through somewhat bleary eyes. ‘You still intending to proceed with this dangerous farce?’

‘There is no other way for it.’ Cameron Bell viewed the rather tatty atmospheric suit the colonel was carrying. ‘Is that my size?’ he asked.

‘One size fits all,’ said the colonel. ‘Found this one in the ship’s stores. Best of a bad bunch. Seams are good enough. Tank’s three-quarters full of air. Gives you half an hour outside. Wish you’d reconsider, though.’

‘As a matter of interest,’ said Cameron Bell, taking the suit from the colonel, ‘what odds are the Jovians offering on who will win this duel?’

‘Well—’ puffed the colonel. ‘Well—’

‘Not good odds on me, then?’

‘Not as such, my dear fellow, no.

Cameron Bell struggled with the atmospheric suit. He was having trouble just getting his legs in. ‘As a betting man yourself,’ he said to the colonel, ‘who, might I ask, have you laid a bet upon?’

‘Well… my dear fellow,’ the colonel puffed.

‘I see,’ said Cameron Bell. ‘And upon what grounds,
precisely,
have the odds become so stacked against me?’

Colonel Katterfelto shrugged.

‘Tell me,’ said Cameron Bell.

‘Well. You know,’ the colonel blustered. ‘One thing and another. Chaps chat. Seems Larkspur has a bit of a reputation for this kind of thing.’

‘He does?’ said Cameron Bell.

‘Bit of a master of deception apparently. How should I put this? Gives off the wrong impressions, you might say.’

‘He does?’ said Cameron Bell once more. In a slightly higher-pitched voice.

‘Apparently so. Stumpy was telling me that Larkspur is noted for his bravery in such situations. Him being such a crack shot and all.’

retting somewhat, Cameron Bell was helped into the atmospheric suit. Colonel Katterfelto screwed on the helmet.

‘I’ll open up the little visor door so you can breathe the ship’s air for now,’ he said. ‘And I’ll link up the air bottle on your back. You can’t actually adjust the controls once it’s on, so I’ll wait until the last moment to switch the valve. Give you as long as possible with an air supply, eh? Not that you will be needing all of it.’

‘What was that last bit
again?’
asked Cameron Bell.

‘Nothing. Nothing. Now, do you have your ray gun?’

‘Trouser pocket,’ said Cameron, peeping out through the opening in the front of his space helmet. ‘The trousers I wore last night are on the floor, I’m afraid. I did consume a tad too much rum.’

‘Wouldn’t be in this fix if you hadn’t.’ The colonel rooted about in the rumpled-up trousers and produced the ray gun. ‘Really wish you’d reconsider,’ he said. And he looked the duelist up and down. ‘Not much room in there, eh? Somewhat tight beneath the armpits.’

‘Somewhat tight all over,’ said Cameron Bell, uncomfortably.

‘Well, best get it over with. Take your gun. ‘Cameron took his gun.

‘And follow me,’ said Colonel Katterfelto.

Corporal Larkspur looked rather splendid in his brand-new atmospheric suit. Rather dashing, quite a romantic figure. Cameron Bell had not been fully aware before as to just how tall and imposing Corporal Larkspur actually was. He had always slouched around with his head hung down in a subservient manner. He was certainly skilled in creating the
wrong
impression.

The corporal squared up before the private detective, looked down upon him and toyed with a ray gun so much bigger than Mr Cameron Bell’s.

‘Cargo area,’ he said, his voice muffled within his sealed space helmet.

Cameron Bell turned to Colonel Katterfelto.

‘Two of you wait in the cargo area,’ said the old soldier. ‘I’ll leave, close the airtight door to the rest of the ship. Once done you can open the outer door and step outside. I’ve roped you both up to this bulkhead so you won’t drift off into space. And this—’ he displayed a cable with a plug upon each end ‘—this goes here and here—’ He plugged one end into Cameron’s spacesuit and the other into that of Corporal Larkspur. ‘Now you can talk to one another outside. You won’t be able to hear me. Nor me you. So—’ he shook each man by the spacesuit-gloved hand ‘—may the best man win and all that how’s-your-father-up-in-Heaven kind of caper. Farewell.’

The colonel saluted and left the cargo hold, closing and locking the inner door securely behind him. He went off to join the Jovians who were thronged along the portholes of the ship’s starboard side awaiting the opening of the cargo bay’s outer door and for all the fun to begin.

In the cargo hold there stood two men who did not care for each other. Two men who would leave the ship in a moment or two, knowing that only one of them would return alive.

Within his snugly fitting atmospheric suit, Cameron Bell was perspiring freely. His fingers felt numb and his heart was beating much too fast. Corporal Larkspur applied himself to the outer door, spun the turn-screw, let it fall open. The air from the cargo hold rushed into space. And Cameron stared after it into the star-strewn nothingness.

‘After you.’ The voice of Corporal Larkspur boomed in Cameron’s ear. ‘Let us have this over and done. I have other things to be getting on with.’

Cameron Bell spoke softly. ‘Quietly now, I have a terrible hangover,’ he lied. ‘But at least no further pretence upon your part as to being a Jovian.’

‘Jovian?’ The corporal’s laugh banged about in Cameron’s helmet. ‘Buffoons to a man of them. Cannon fodder, they are, and nothing more.’

‘You are not wholly human,’ said Cameron Bell. ‘How shall I put this?’ He was trying most hard to stop his voice quavering. ‘Are you perhaps of
mixed race?
An English mother of— how shall I put this? — loose morals—’

Cameron heard the rush of air as the corporal drew in breath. ‘Outside,’ he shouted. ‘I’ll deal with you—’

‘You first,’ said Mr Bell. ‘I would hate for there to be an accident. Your ray gun accidentally discharging into my back, for instance.’

‘No need for that.’ Corporal Larkspur lunged at Cameron Bell, sought to fling the private detective into space. Mr Bell, however, had seen that coming. He stepped nimbly aside, tripped the corporal and sent him blundering forwards, through the open outer door, out into the universe beyond.

Cameron Bell watched him floundering weightlessly. He could of course just slam the outer door shut and leave the corporal hanging there. Slamming the outer door shut might well sever the rope that tethered him to the ship. That would be that.

Cameron Bell shook his head and followed the corporal into space. They were still linked together by the communication cable, although secured to the ship by separate ropes. Cameron Bell said, ‘Sorry, I tripped, far too much rum last night.’

Corporal Larkspur had steadied himself ‘Your next drink will be with the Devil,’ was what he had to say.

‘I am quietly confident,’ said Cameron Bell, in a way that sounded as if he must truly have meant it. ‘But before we perform the duel, might I ask you a question or two?’

Laughter rang in the detective’s ear. ‘Oh, please do, Mr Bell.’

‘Who employs you?’ asked Cameron Bell. ‘And what was your real reason for coming to Venus?’

Corporal Larkspur seemingly hovered before Mr Bell. And although the
Marie Lloyd
rushed on towards Earth, there was no sense of motion. Just two men floating in a blackness that appeared almost liquid. It was one of the most curious experiences Cameron Bell had ever had. If it were not for the prospect of imminent death it would also have been one of the most pleasurable.

‘I work for a great man,’ said Corporal Larkspur. ‘The greatest of this or any age. Soon his name will be known on all the inhabited worlds of the Solar System. Because he will rule them all.’

‘I feel the Governments of Earth, Jupiter and Venus might have something to say about that,’ said Mr Bell, who could see Mars quite clearly from where he drifted and very nice it looked, too.

‘All will soon be his.’

‘But you would not care to tell me how?’

‘No,’ said the corporal. ‘I would not. But I will tell you this. The reason for the journey to Venus was so that I could acquire a certain mineral.’

‘Magoniam,’
said Cameron Bell.

‘Correct. The Jovian hunters were just a means to an end. If there was any trouble with the natives they could shoot it out, like those cowboy fellows in America, whilst I absconded with the mineral prize.’

‘And the colonel?’

‘Expendable along with the rest. A brave man, I knew he would defend his employer. He actually thinks I will allow him to leave the ship alive with all that money.’

‘You intend to kill everyone on board, then?’

‘I have a rather splendid Treacle Sponge Bastard prepared. Laced with poison. I will be serving it tonight. Then I return to Earth alone.’

‘That is assuming that you are lucky enough to win this duel.’

‘Lucky enough?’ The laughter now hurt Cameron’s ear. ‘I do not think that luck will play any part in this.’

‘Events do not always go precisely as one might wish,’ said Cameron Bell. ‘One side believes that he has the advantage, when in fact it was the other side all along.’

‘On this occasion you will find that
I
have the advantage.’

‘How so?’ asked Cameron Bell.

‘Well, let me see.’ Within his helmet, Corporal Larkspur’s face took on a thoughtful expression. ‘I am younger, fitter, stronger, braver and more skilful with a ray gun than yourself.’

‘I am not as old as you might think,’ said Cameron Bell. ‘I suffered premature baldness. It runs in my family.’

‘It will run no longer, Mr Bell.’

‘And as to skills with a ray gun — I will have you know that I am a member of the Hurlingham Shooting Club. I won a gold cup two years ago for bagging eighteen pair of grouse on a single day at Lord Hartington’s estate in Sheen.’

Laughter fairly rattled Cameron’s head.

‘Perhaps you should have brought your shotgun along,’ the corporal suggested.

‘I have the trusty Educator.’ Cameron waggled his ray gun about.

‘Oh yes. Your dear little ray gun. The one you used to start the spaceship.’

‘That very one,’ said Cameron Bell.

‘The one on which you reversed the neutron flow to charge the battery of the ship’s engine.

‘Saved all our lives,’ said Cameron, proudly. ‘And you never acknowledged
that.’

‘No. You are right. I should.’ Corporal Larkspur could hardly speak at all now, he was laughing so hard. ‘So you are going to shoot
me
with
that?’
he managed to say.

‘That
is
my intention,’ said Cameron Bell.

‘But just tell me how, if you will?’ Corporal Larkspur was shaking now from head to floating foot.

‘I thought I might just point it at you and squeeze the trigger,’ the detective suggested.

‘Oh do. Please do.’

‘Do you not want us to count up to ten?’ asked Cameron Bell.

‘No.’ Corporal Larkspur was literally sobbing with laughter. ‘Just aim and pull the trigger. Go on, do.’

‘Splendid,’ said Cameron Bell and without further words on his part he aimed the ray gun at Corporal Larkspur and pulled the trigger.

Cameron Bell pulled the trigger again and again.

But nothing happened. Not a thing. Not one little thing. Cameron squinted through his helmet glass at the Educator. There was a little red light showing on the side. A little red light that meant the battery was flat.

‘In all the excitement,’ Corporal Larkspur laughed as he spoke, ‘you forgot to charge it again. I could see the red battery light as you floated out into space.

‘Oh,’ said Cameron Bell. ‘This is most inconvenient.’