The Mammoth Book of Threesomes and Moresomes (33 page)

Bill was in a bad mood. Work was frustrating. The coffee shop had been out of croissants. He had forgotten his cell phone in his desk. Nothing was going right today. He knew that on days like today Katie always found some way to provoke him further. He hoped today would be different. He didn’t feel like a fight right now. Except that he did love the passion of the post-fight sex.

What he found when he came home was certainly different than what he had been expecting but no less provocative. Katie was in the kitchen, her shorts around her ankles, and some girl was kneeling with her head between Katie’s thighs. Katie’s face was buried in the cleavage of another girl who was on the table on all fours. Her skirt was flipped up to her waist and some guy was behind her, sticking his fingers deep inside.

Bill was stunned for a minute and for that minute no one noticed him at all. They just went on licking and sucking and probing each other. Then Bill got angry.

“Katie, you fucking slut!” he roared. “What the hell are you doing? Who are these whores?”

Katie lifted her head from between Marlene’s tits. “Oh honey,” she said, confused, “you know how you said we should try new things in bed . . .?”

“In bed with each other, not in the goddamn kitchen with a crew of mangy perverts!” he yelled, his voice becoming more constricted. His arm flung out threateningly, knocking the spice rack to the floor. “I’ll show you to fuck around on me!” He moved forwards with malevolence. Before he could take a single step, however, Dan was on top of him. They crashed down to the kitchen floor in a flurry of violence.

Katie screamed. Jenny held her tight. “It’s OK,” she said. “Dan’s very good at this.” Marlene adjusted her position on the kitchen table to watch.

Dan was a master wrestler. He had been a wrestling champion in university and he kept it up, practising multiple times a week in various ways. Every time Bill tried to go for Dan’s throat, Dan ducked underneath and bent Bill’s arm backwards. Every time Bill tried to get up, Dan would knock his legs out from under him. Bill was angry, bent on inflicting pain. Dan was enjoying himself, bent only on his own amusement. Dan flung himself on Bill’s back and they crashed to the floor again. Bill hit the linoleum face first, smashing his nose, which began to bleed. Dan snuck his arm quickly under Bill’s chin and secured it.

“This,” he announced, “is a rear naked chokehold.” Then he said, lower, into Bill’s ear, “Too bad we’re not actually naked.” Dan knew Bill must be able to feel Dan’s hard cock resting between his butt cheeks.

“It’s OK, Katie,” Marlene soothed the distraught woman. “Now we can talk to him.”

Jenny got down on the floor, face to face with the immobilized Bill. “I’m Jenny,” she said. “That’s Marlene and Dan. We’re not dangerous.” Dan sniggered. “Well, not
very
dangerous,” amended Jenny. “We just want to make Katie feel good. And you too if you want to. Do you want to?” Bill’s eyes were watering. His jaw worked but no words came out. “Your girlfriend’s very lovely, it’s a shame for you to keep her for yourself.”

Katie blurted out, “How come you never call me lovely?” in Bill’s direction. She looked startled to have spoken.

“You never tell her she’s lovely, Bill. How is a woman supposed to feel good if you don’t tell her that she’s lovely?” Jenny stroked Katie’s breasts through her shirt. “I want to make your girlfriend feel good. Don’t you want me to?”

Marlene, perched far above on the table, asked, “Katie, does Bill have any porn?”

“Yes . . . it’s behind the James Bond movies,” Katie admitted. Marlene hopped down and exited into the living room, coming back with an armful of movies.

“Chicks Licking Chicks, Booty Babe Bacchanal,
yep, he’s certainly got some girl-on-girl stuff in here.”

“Well then,” cooed Jenny. “He must like to watch that sort of thing.” Her hand reached for Katie’s exposed cunt. Bill’s eyes widened. Jenny stroked Katie with one hand and removed her own shirt and pants with the other. She was wearing a black and red lacy set of matching bra and panties. She removed Katie’s shirt and bra, leaving her completely naked. She rolled Katie back up on to her shoulders, her cunt arching towards the sky, and she began to eat it in earnest. She spit huge wads of saliva into Katie’s open hole and put two fingers in, then three, then four. She teased Katie’s clit with her tongue until Katie begged for more, then took it away to plunge her whole hand deep inside. Katie moaned and wailed.

Bill watched, transfixed. Dan still didn’t want to let his guard down, though, so he caught Marlene’s eye. Marlene knew just what to do. She left the table to get down on the ground beside Bill. She stroked his face. Bill’s breath caught and he forced his eyes away from Jenny and Katie to look at Marlene.

“No, no, don’t look at me, love,” said Marlene. “You watch the show. I’m just here to help you.” Dan rolled over on his side, pulling Bill with him, leaving his front exposed to Marlene. She unzipped his pants. “Hard already,” she announced. “Are we surprised?”

Dan chuckled. “That makes two of us,” he whispered into Bill’s ear as Bill’s cock disappeared into Marlene’s mouth.

Now that Bill was occupied and overstimulated, watching his girlfriend get fucked by a girl while his dick was getting sucked, Dan felt comfortable adjusting his hold. He pulled Bill’s arms behind Bill’s back so he could secure them with just one of his own hands. This left his other hand free to unzip his own pants and pull out his cock. He stroked it for a bit, waiting, watching.

Katie and Jenny were reaching a fevered pitch. Katie’s moans echoed all around them. Jenny’s fingers were moving fast and furious inside Katie . . . but her head was upright and her eyes were roaming around the kitchen floor. Jenny was looking for something. Triumphant, she reached out and grabbed the pepper grinder, left on the floor from Bill’s upset of the spice rack. She leered at Bill as she put the pepper grinder in her mouth. Then she turned back to put the circular knob at the top of the grinder into Katie’s pussy. Katie screamed but did not try to scramble away. She stayed on her shoulders, her cunt up in the air and the pepper grinder sunk deep inside her, the end sticking straight up. Jenny put her hand on it, pushed it away from her, forcing Katie’s body up further on to her shoulders, her pussy higher up into the air . . . her asshole now facing Jenny. Jenny flicked her tongue at it and Katie howled. Jenny pushed down hard on the pepper grinder at the same time as she stuck her whole tongue in Katie’s ass. Katie started shaking all over and making sounds both high and low at once, like two cats fighting.

Marlene chose this moment to use her impressive deep-throating talents. Bill’s moans joined Katie’s and his eyes bugged out in her direction. Dan decided this was the time to get his pleasure out of this twisted situation. He released Bill with his arms, trusting Marlene’s mouth to hold him in place. He pulled Bill’s pants down and slapped Bill’s ass with his cock. Bill arched up against it, reacting now to any touch. Dan reached back and happily found that he could reach the fridge, from which he extracted the margarine. He greased his cock up with it and placed its head against Bill’s virgin little anus. Bill bucked, startled, seemed to come back to himself. Dan wrestled him to the ground again, still on his side. Marlene’s amazing mouth never left Bill’s cock. Dan wrapped his legs around Bill’s, pulling them back and apart. He placed his cock back at Bill’s anal entrance.

Katie came, shivering and shrieking, the pepper grinder flying out of her with the force of her cunt muscles clenching.

“Did I tell you you could come?” yelled Jenny, slapping Katie’s ass.

Bill grunted, though whether it was a yes or a no and whether it was directed towards Dan’s oncoming attempt at sodomy or at the abuse of his girlfriend was unclear.

“Yes,” said Jenny, calm now, looking in his direction. “Your little slut is still coming.” It was true. Each blow that landed on her ass sent another paroxysm of pleasure through Katie’s body. “I think you’d better help me out with that.”

Jenny flattened Katie’s body down on the kitchen floor and slid her towards Bill, helped along by the slipperiness of the floor which was covered in Jenny’s saliva and Katie’s pussy juice. She pushed Katie till her cunt was right under Bill’s mouth, being sure not to dislodge Marlene down below. “Eat it!” she demanded. Bill complied. Katie whimpered. “You have been making altogether too much noise,” Jenny told her. “What will the neighbours think? I think I should keep your mouth busy.” Jenny pulled her panties to one side and sat on Katie’s face. She didn’t have to tell Katie to eat it – Katie knew what was expected of her and eagerly sucked and licked at Jenny’s swollen pussy.

Bill’s mouth was full of cunt and his cock was being sucked – he must be too busy to even notice, reasoned Dan, knowing full well that Bill would still likely notice a cock in his ass. He did. Still, the full head of Dan’s cock was wedged up in there before Bill pulled away from his girlfriend’s crotch in protest.

In reaction Marlene stopped. She slid up towards his face. “Don’t you fucking stop eating that pussy,” she growled at him. “I’m gonna keep sucking your cock and you’re gonna keep eating that pussy and that’s what’s going to happen.” She slapped his face once, hard, then slid down again.

Bill lowered his face again. He moaned into Katie’s cunt as Marlene nibbled on his balls. He grunted into Katie’s cunt as Dan thrust deeper into his ass. Katie moaned into Jenny’s cunt and Jenny moaned into the air. They were all getting off now . . . except for diligent Marlene, still hard at work on Bill’s cock. Dan, always conscientious about other people’s pleasure, at least as much as he was about his own, grabbed the abandoned pepper grinder and stuck it into Marlene’s pussy. She thrust up into it even as she continued to swallow Bill’s dick. Dan shoved the pepper shaker down into her even as he thrust his cock into Bill. Now they really were all getting off.

Jenny was a squirter, a fact which neither Dan nor Marlene nor Jenny herself had felt the need to warn Katie. When Jenny came it filled Katie’s mouth and splashed down her naked torso, hitting the top of Bill’s head. She choked on it, coughed it up, came again herself. Jenny collapsed on the floor. Katie pushed herself away from Bill and slid back into Jenny. Jenny wrapped her arms around her, pinching her nipples, and they stayed like that watching Marlene and Dan and Bill.

Marlene’s head moved quickly then languidly, teasing Bill along, then even harder and faster than before. Bill’s body jerked from the force of Dan’s thrusts but Marlene still kept her expert mouth wrapped around his dick. As Dan’s movements became more urgent, so did hers. Suddenly Bill froze. His eyes rolled up into the back of his head and he went limp. Marlene crawled forwards, turned his face up, and spat a long stream of his jism into his face. She was just in time to get out of the way as Dan pulled out from Bill’s ass and pulled himself up to come all over Bill’s face, Dan’s jism mixing with Bill’s own.

Dan fell over Bill’s chest, finding enough energy in himself to slam the palm of his hand hard into the pepper grinder sticking out of Marlene’s pussy. It drove deep into her, almost disappearing. When she came she toppled forwards on to Bill’s sticky face.

Jenny, Marlene and Dan recovered more quickly than Katie and Bill, which was to be expected – they were well versed in debauchery and thus more used to the exertion involved. They dressed quickly and left, not wanting to find out if Bill would recover his anger along with his awareness.

Jenny came out on to the deck, stretching and tying her locks back, to do her daily morning yoga ritual. As she was saluting the sun she saw Katie in the window across the alley, staring straight at her. It was bound to happen, of course. Now that the couple knew the freaky threesome, how could they not notice them across the way? Jenny smiled her most guileless smile and waved. For a long moment Katie just stared at her, then, slowly, held her hand up in a still facsimile of a wave. Jenny smiled again and then continued with her salutation, gracefully folding over at the waist.

Now Katie and Bill must know where they live. Perhaps they’ll be over to exact their revenge, thought Jenny. We can only hope.

The Twelve Fucking Princesses

Kendra Wayne

Once upon a time there were twelve princesses, and every night . . .

What? Did I
ask
you to stop me if you’d heard this before? Because you might
think
you’ve heard it, but you don’t know the real story. You know the watered-down, sanitized, safe-for-children version.

The truth isn’t really appropriate for children, trust me.

You really think it’s about twelve princesses dancing their shoes to tatters? Have you never heard of euphemisms?

C’m ’ere. Let me tell you what really happened.

Yes, there were twelve princesses, but they weren’t sisters, because if they were some of them would be too young for this story. They were at a finishing school, and they were supposed to be sweet virginal things, and the headmaster couldn’t figure out where they were sneaking off to every night and half-destroying their clothes.

And smelling suspiciously like certain bodily fluids – both women’s and men’s.

Not that the headmaster could admit that to their parents, oh no. How could he? He’d get flogged – and not in a way he’d enjoy it. He had to get to the bottom of this before anyone else found out.

He tried locking the door and sitting outside. No go. He tried hiring chaperones to stay in the young women’s communal dorm room (because he certainly couldn’t), but they all ended up refunding the money and wandering off looking, well, smug. Self-satisfied.

W.T.F., right?

So word got out about the headmaster’s problem – I’m not saying he was advertising, but you know how these things go. And one of the people who heard the word was . . . let’s call him John, shall we? John, not to put too fine a point on it, was an ass. Sure, he wanted the money (by this point, the headmaster was getting a little desperate), but he also figured if he played his cards right, he might get his hands on a little bit of princess treasure, and I’m not talking about gold and jewels.