The Love Square (29 page)

Chapter 33

Clare

When Clare told Cindy what had happened with Dylan, Cindy hopped on the next flight to Los Angeles. “I’m your best friend, and you need me,” she said. “Besides, I’ve always wanted to see California.”

That night, they sat on Clare’s couch in their pajamas with a bowl of popcorn and a bottle of wine. Cindy’s strawberry-blonde hair sat in a ball directly on top of her head, and Clare’s hair was finally long enough for a ponytail. They weren’t beauties that night, but neither cared, happy to have each other.

Cindy dipped her popcorn in her wine and popped it in her mouth.

“Gross!” Clare giggled.

“You fancy Cali people don’t dip your popcorn? You don’t know what you’re missing.”

Clare fake barfed and smacked Cindy on the arm. “Us fancy people in California smother everything in avocado.”

“What’s an ay-voy-caydo?” she joked.

Clare laughed. “You can take the girl out of Omaha, dot, dot, dot…”

“So, are you going to show me the sites tomorrow, or do you want to wallow more?”

“I’m sorry I’m such a wallower. Everything feels different now.”

“Are you going to come back?” Cindy asked. “You could move to Omaha with me. I know it’s not a big city like LA, but we have cool stuff there too, like the art museum, Old Market…”

“I love Omaha, Cin, but I just took the GM job here. I’ve grown fond of the beach too.”

At the mention of the beach, Cindy’s eyes lit up. “The beach! Take me tomorrow?”

“But we were going to wallow,” Clare whined.

“We can wallow at the beach! It’s called multitasking, oh general manager.”

Clare huffed. “Okay. The beach it is. But you cannot wear your hair like that. And you can’t make fun of my slutty bikini.”

Cindy gasped. “I want a slutty bikini too!”

Clare looked her over. “You’re flat as a board, Cin. But we can get you a padded slutty bikini if you want.”

Cindy put her arm around Clare. “See, Clare Bear. Slutty-bikini shopping.
That’s
what friends are for.”

***

The next day, after slutty-bikini shopping, Clare and Cindy took the truck to the beach. Her beach. The beach she shared with Dylan. They marched through the sand to Clare’s usual spot and spread their blanket, stripped down to their bathing suits, and basked in the sun.

When Cindy decided to explore, Clare shut her eyes. She concentrated and almost sensed Dylan, hearing his breathing like she did when he’d fall asleep next to her and she’d feel the heat from his body. She had loved their afternoons together lying in that very spot, with the sound of the waves and the smell of the sea. She could feel his hands rubbing lotion on her back.
Oh, the lotion.
How she missed the lotion! She squirmed on the blanket as her body tingled with sensations conjured from her memory of the man she couldn’t have.

When she thought she heard his voice, she froze.
I can even hear him.
Gosh, she missed him.

“You’re getting red, Nebraska.”

There it is again!
Dylan’s voice sounded like a song. She willed herself to hear it again.

“I had a feeling you’d be here,” the voice said.

Her eyes tried to open, but she worked to keep them shut, not wanting to wake from the dream.
Keep talking to me
,
Lusty
,
she told herself.

When she felt the coldness on her arm, she jerked awake. “Ah!” she yelled. Someone was touching her hot skin with a cold water bottle. She followed the hand that held the bottle up the arm, over the fitted T-shirt, across the shoulder, to the flecky, gold eyes.

He grinned, and her heart skipped a beat.

“You’re really here?” she asked.

“What were you dreaming about? You were all fidgety.”

Clare searched the blanket for her T-shirt and held it to her chest. “I was not ‘fidgety.’ You don’t belong here.” Instantly annoyed, she rubbed her head to fluff her beach hair.
Of course I look like crap.
“Why are you here? Aren’t you supposed to be on a movie tour or having a baby or something?”

“I came for you.” Four words Clare would never forget.

She pulled her shirt over her head while Dylan lounged on the blanket watching, stretched out in jeans and bare feet, looking like another magazine ad. Clare caught a glimpse of bare skin over his waistband and sighed. “Don’t get comfortable. You’re not staying.”

“It’s a free country. I can stay.”

She huffed. “What do you want, Dylan?”

“You.”

They held each other’s stare, and then Cindy returned, breaking the tension. She dropped onto the blanket in front of Dylan.

“My God. Dylan fucking Barnes.” She looked from his head to his toes. “Maxwell Policastro. Gladiators. Billboards. You are one handsome son of a bitch.”

Clare tsked while Dylan smiled. “You must be Cindy,” he said. “Clare talks about you all the time.”

Clare glared at Dylan as he charmed her best friend. When he noticed Clare’s aggravation, he flashed even more of those white perfect teeth.
Bastard!

Cindy caught the exchange and crossed her arms over her chest. “Oh wait! I’m supposed to hate you,” she said. “I don’t know why, but I do. You…you’re a jerk! You hurt Clare, so you suck.” Cindy looked at Clare and nodded sternly.

Clare fake smiled at her. “Thanks, hon. I appreciate the effort, but go ahead and swoon. I’m used to it. Then maybe you can get rid of him.” Clare stood and pulled her shirt down over her hips, scanning the beach for her quickest escape route.

Cindy raised her eyebrows at Dylan. “Yikes.”

“Right?” Dylan said to Cindy, shrugging. Then he stood and faced Clare. “Would you excuse us, Cindy? I have to talk to Clare.”

“Go right ahead,” Cindy said. “I’ll disappear.”

Clare grimaced at her friend. “Thanks a lot.”

“He’s right,” she said. “You need to talk.”

Dylan smiled at Cindy. “I like you.”

When Cindy beamed at his words and winked at him, Clare growled and stomped down the beach. She spun around when she reached a semiprivate area out of Cindy’s range and caught Dylan’s eyes darting upward. “Were you looking at my ass?”

He smirked. “How could I not?”

She squinted at him. “You are having a baby with another woman. You have a movie coming out next weekend. You should not be here…looking at my ass.”

“It’s exactly where I want to be. With you and your amazing ass.”

Clare shook her head. “When are you going to get the hint? We don’t belong together. We’re too different. You’re all…” She waved her arms around, unable to find a word. “You. And I’m just—”

“You,” he answered calmly. “You’re all you, and I love all you.”

She stared at him for a moment, then realized something. “Oh. My. God. You’re crazy! I should have seen it. You’re actually crazy.” She paced as she babbled about signs and threw diagnoses at him.

Dylan shook his head. “I’m not crazy, Clare. Sorry to disappoint you. Listen to me. Can you stop and listen to me for one second?” He grasped her arms to steady her, forcing her to look into his eyes.

Clare wiggled out of his hands and crossed her arms over her chest.

“After the movie stuff, I’m moving to New York to be near Jenna and the baby. I want to be a good father, like my father was to me.”

“That’s great—”

“I’m. Not. Done,” he barked, poking her T-shirt over her chest.

His tone startled Clare into silence. She retained her defensive stance, even though his hair shined in the sunlight and his sparkly eyes locked on to hers.

“Alex is moving in with Jenna. They finally figured out they belong together. I’m going to take Alex’s apartment so I’ll be right upstairs for the baby. I’d like you to move with me.”

Clare raised her eyebrows and jutted out her hip, waiting for a punch line that didn’t come.

“Well?” he asked.

She smirked. “Oh, I’m allowed to talk now?”

Dylan took a deep breath. She knew she was trying his patience, but she didn’t care. “Please,” he said. “Talk.”

“All right, then. No. I will not move to New York with you.”

Dylan sighed. “Why not?”

“Why not? My God, you
are
crazy!”

“Clare,” Dylan said calmly, “tell me why you can’t be with me.”

Clare shook her head.
Is this really happening? Is Dylan asking me to move to New York with him?
She cleared her throat. “Because I live here in LA now. I took the GM job at the store, I like it here, and my life does not revolve around you and your baby mama and your weird little love triangle.” Clare lifted her chin, proud to stand up for herself no matter how empty her words sounded.

Dylan nodded. “I get that. I do. But here’s the thing, Clare.”

She started pacing again, and Dylan didn’t try to stop her.

“Alex, Jenna, and I have been talking a lot the last few days. We know our situation isn’t exactly a typical family, but we’re grateful we can all be part of the baby’s life. The only one missing is you.”

“I’m not a part of the baby’s life,” she said, stomping back and forth in front of him.

“But you’re a part of mine. The biggest part. You see, Jenna, Alex, and I don’t have a love triangle. We have a love square. You’re the empty corner, and we all want you with us. Especially me.”

Dylan reached into his back pocket and dug around. Clare caught a glimpse of something shiny. She didn’t figure out it was a ring until he held it out for her inspection.

A diamond.
A gosh-darned diamond ring.
Shaped like a square, the solitaire shimmered on a gold band, teasing her.

“Marrying me means that you’ll also marry Alex and Jenna. It means you’ll be a second mother to the baby. It’s never going to be just us, and I can’t promise it will be perfect. But Clare…I can’t imagine my life without you. I’m sorry I took a jagged path to get to you, but from here on out, it’s a straight road. A road with bumps along the way, but it’s you and me. Will you marry me, Nebraska?”

Clare shut her eyes tightly, then opened them to make sure what was happening was real. Then she said, “No.”

Chapter 34

Alex

Alex helped Jenna sort through her closet to make room for his stuff and thought he might be dreaming. “Are we really moving in together, Stecs?”

Jenna shook her head. “For the millionth time, yes. I don’t know why it’s such a big deal for you. You practically live here anyway. At least now I can squeeze you for rent.”

“Oh, baby,” Alex said, “you can squeeze me for anything, anytime you want.” He navigated through boxes and piles of clothes to wrap his arms around her. She leaned back into him, and he smelled her flowery shampoo. “Let’s skip this and go back to bed,” he said before kissing her neck.

Jenna lifted her chin to grant him access. “Dylan’s going to be here any minute.”

“I can work with a minute when I know I have forever,” Alex said, running his hands down her body.

“Pretty soon I’m going to be a fat, pregnant mess. Will you still want me?” Jenna asked. She teased, but he heard the hint of concern in her voice.

“What do you think?” He pulled her back into his front, knowing she’d feel exactly how much he wanted her. “I can’t keep my hands off you. You’re like a magnet.”

Jenna spun around, her brown eyes popping playfully. “A magnet? I’ve never been called a piece of iron before.”

Alex stuttered. “Well, uh, you’re a beautiful, incredibly sexy, irresistible-type magnet, that I want to make out with all the time.” He flashed his best smile.

“I didn’t know,” Jenna said timidly.

“That you were a magnet or that I wanted to make out with you all the time?” Alex asked.

“No, I knew that. Not the magnet thing.”

“Now I’m confused.” He ran his hands down her long hair, pulling at her tangles.

“Huh?”

“You said that you ‘didn’t know,’ and I thought you meant you didn’t know you were a magnet—”

“Oh.” She shook her head. “I was going to say I didn’t know that you could be so sappy.”

Alex squinted. “Sappy? The magnet stuff was sappy? Why is my head starting to hurt? Life with you is going to be a constant headache, isn’t it?” he teased.

“Probably. You up for it?”

Alex smiled and sighed. “Absolutely.”

“Good,” she said, wrapping her arms around his neck.

Alex pulled her to his chest and then flipped her into a dip a few inches from the floor. “How’s this for ‘sappy’—”

“
Ah!
What are you doing? You’re going to drop me!” she said through giggles.

“I love you, Jenna,” he said in a horrible fake French accent. “My beautiful magnet. Let’s love each other. Make sweet love to me.”

Jenna smacked him playfully, and he lifted her back to standing position. “We have to work on your sap. And your French, apparently. But my answer is yes, definitely. Yes to magnets, yes to sweet lovemaking, yes to everything.”

She kissed him, and the world settled around him. Her hands moved under his shirt, and she made a sweet noise that crushed his insides. Just as he was about to pull her shirt over her head, they heard the knock on the door.

“You two decent?” Dylan called through the door.

Jenna scooted away from Alex.

“Fucking Barnes,” Alex murmured, readjusting his clothes.

Jenna laughed and straightened her shirt. “Yeah,” she called. “Come in.”

They met Dylan in the living room. “You’re an absolute mess,” Alex said, examining him. “Why haven’t you called?”

Dylan reached for Jenna’s tummy. “How’s the little guy? Are you feeling okay?”

She smiled. “I guess he’s good. I don’t feel anything, I’m eating, and I’m over the sleepiness too. Where’s Clare? Did you find her?”

Dylan rubbed the stubble on his chin. “She said no.”

Jenna jerked back. “What?”

“She said no.”

Alex grimaced. “That doesn’t make sense. She loves you.”

Dylan shrugged. “She said she doesn’t belong with us, she wants to stay in LA, be independent. I don’t know. All I can figure out right now is that I’m mentally and physically exhausted and need a bed. Can I go up?”

Alex nodded. “It’s officially your place now, D-Barnes. You don’t have to ask me.”

Dylan dragged himself out of the apartment and shut the door behind him. Jenna picked up her phone, tapped the screen, and then held it to her ear. Alex could practically see the wheels turning in her head.

“What are you doing, Jen?” he warned. “Don’t interfere.”

“She’s not picking up, the little witch.” Jenna tapped out a message.

Alex tried to take her phone, but she wiggled out of his grasp. “This isn’t your business. Let Dylan handle it,” he said.

“You saw how Dylan handled it. Horribly. I have to try, Alex. Please understand. I feel responsible for Dylan and his happiness.”

“Dylan’s happiness isn’t your responsibility. None of this is your fault.”

“It is, though,” she said. “If it weren’t for the pregnancy, he’d be with Clare by now. This whole arrangement with the baby isn’t going to work without Clare. Don’t you see? We need her to complete our square.” She kissed him softly on the lips. “Let me try.”

When Jenna went into tornado mode, Alex knew there was not stopping her. “Okay, sweetheart. You try. Just don’t be disappointed if they don’t get their happy ending.”

Jenna waved a hand at him and went back to her phone. “Oh, they’ll have their happy ending. Come hell or high water.”

***

Jenna

After an hour, Jenna almost gave up on her plan of calling Clare incessantly until she annoyed her enough to pick up. Even though Alex had bailed after the first ten minutes, Jenna sat on the couch tapping Redial for another hour. Finally, after about fifty calls and twenty texts, Clare answered.

“Is somebody dead? I’m working here.”

Jenna heard the annoyance and fought off guilty feelings. She was on a mission. “Then you should have picked up an hour ago.”

“Before I scream at you, is everything okay with the baby?”

“Everything’s fine. I need you to listen to me for thirty seconds.”

“Fine. If it’s so darn important to you.”

Jenna thought she had the words ready, but they all slipped from her mind. She decided to go with what was in her heart.

“Dylan’s the father of my baby and I’ll always love him for that, but he loves you. I want you to be clear on the fact that Alex and I are together now, and I have no interest in being anything with Dylan besides friends who co-parent.”

“That’s great,” Clare snipped. “I’m happy for you. Can I get back to work now?”

Jenna’s blood boiled. “Listen, you spoiled little brat”—Clare gasped on the other end, but Jenna continued—“all Dylan’s told me since I met him is how great you are. ‘Clare this’ and ‘Clare that’ and ‘Clare’s the best person I ever met’ and blah, blah, blah, Clare, Clare, Clare. He made it sound like you two were a little team of awesomeness that could take on Hollywood, Nebraska, and the damn world.”

Clare was silent, so Jenna kept talking. “If you love him like I think you do, like he thinks you do, you can’t abandon him now. This isn’t going to be easy, but even if I weren’t having a baby, it wouldn’t be easy. Something always pops into the mix. You don’t realize because your life in Nebraska was all shits and giggles. Well, welcome to real life, honey. It isn’t like that.”

“You know nothing about my life. And for the record, I’m not abandoning Dylan,” Clare said. “
He
abandoned
me
when he went to New York and slept with
you
.”

“You
are
abandoning him, and us sleeping together is ancient history.”

“Your baby is not ancient history. How can you expect me to insert myself into your little incestuous group?”

Jenna sighed. “You know what? It’s valid that you would feel a bit…awkward, I guess. Alex and Dylan have a history together, so he doesn’t have the same challenges you may face.”

“See! That’s what—”

“
However
,” Jenna said, “if you love Dylan and want to have a life with him, you’re going to have to deal with a bit of awkwardness and readjust. Alex keeps calling us a ‘team,’ but Dylan needs more. He needs you. He loves you and he’s…” Jenna searched for the right words and remembered her time with Dylan. “He’s fucking amazing. Isn’t he worth a little awkwardness and readjustment, Clare?”

Jenna waited for Clare to yell, but she didn’t.

“That’s it,” Jenna said. “I’ve said my piece. I hope you reconsider and realize how lucky you are and that the man who loves you is a goddamn dream. He’s worth your efforts.”

And with that, Jenna ended the call.