The Love Child (35 page)

Carlotta was often at Eyot Abbas. She was very fond of Harriet, still believing her to be her mother. But it was not so much this supposed relationship which held them together as the fact that they were two of a kind. Harriet gave entertainments at her house and often staged plays. Carlotta always wanted the chief part in these and Harriet was content to give these to her.

“For the sake of the play,” she said. “Carlotta should have gone on the stage. Of course it’s looks mostly. She would have brought them in! If King Charles were alive he would move heaven and earth to get that one into his bed.” She laughed at me.

“Now you are looking like Prim Priscilla. That child will have lovers, mark my words.

What we have to make sure of is that it doesn’t happen too soon and with the wrong one.”

Carlotta had escaped from Emily Philpot’s jurisdiction and we had engaged a governess for her, a pleasant young woman who, like Christabel, had come from a vicarage. “Always the best background,” said my mother.

So Amelia Garston entered our household, and Carlotta spent certain reluctant hours in the schoolroom. Emily did not resent this because she had long realized that Carlotta was too much for her to handle, and in any case she had my dear, gentle Damaris, who responded so cleverly to learning and was a good child into the bargain.

Carlotta never liked to be in one place too long. She visited Christabel now and then. Young Thomas adored her, hi common with other members of his sex. I liked going to Grassland Manor. It was such a happy household. I had never seen anyone change as Christabel had, and the change never failed to delight me. Envy had spoiled her life and now it had completely disappeared. She was deeply contented.

She admitted to me once that there was nothing more she wanted, 223

then she qualified that. “Yes, just one thing. I’d like to have another child. Thomas would love another. Of course, we are lucky to have young Thomas-who is the most wonderful child in the world, although I don’t expect you to agree with me-but I should like to have given Thomas several more children.”

“Perhaps you will,” I said.

“No.” She shook her head. “You know I nearly died with Thomas. The doctor said that to have another would be dangerous. I think my dear husband would rather have me than another child … even if I could have it.”

“I’m sure of that.”

“I’m so glad it turned out the way it did, though I don’t deserve it. I really don’t.”

“I never heard such nonsense,” I said; and she just smiled at me and shook her head.

Carlotta was a frequent visitor at Enderby Hall. She had cornpletely charmed Robert Frinton and I was glad that she went to see him, for he was a lonely old man. I often wondered what he would say if he knew of the relationship between them. I was sure he would be pleased.

He had made a habitable residence of Enderby Hall but he never quite succeeded hi dispelling the gloom. I could never enter that hall without feeling a faint twinge of apprehension, and on the rare occasions when I had been there alone, I would find myself taking furtive looks over my shoulder because I felt I was being watched.

He had brought a small staff of servants with him and lived quite simply. He often visited us, for my mother was constantly inviting him. I noticed that as soon as he arrived he would look round for Carlotta, and if she were not present-for she often decided that she would go and stay with Harriet-he would be unable to bide his disappointment.

Of course Carlotta was wayward and bent on having her own way, but she only had to smile at us and we were her slaves. All except Harriet, who made no attempt to please her and somehow managed to do it as well as any of us could.

It was a sunny day hi the June of the year 1695 when Harriet and I sat in the gardens of Eyot Abbas overlooking the sea, and as I made out the island just rising out of the sea mist, I remembered, as I could never fail to, that night I had spent there with Carlotta’s father. I thought of my youth, my innocence and the tenderness of our love, so beautiful in itself and the beginning of everything which had happened afterwards, culminating in that night of horror which still 224

haunted my dreams and coloured my life. It was like a black cloud, ever present, menacing my happiness.

Leigh and I were, of course, happy together, but the complete intimacy for which we both longed still eluded us. It was a mystery to Leigh, but I knew full well what it was. I could never feel completely at peace while the memory lay between us.

I knew Leigh well-the kindest of men where his loved ones were concerned, but he was capable of a reckless fury over what he considered injustice. He had gone over easily to the side of William because, although he had sworn allegiance to the King, he did not respect him. His commanding officer, Churchill, had his wholehearted support; and if Churchill went over to William, then he believed it was morally right for him to do so. I often thought of the way in which Leigh had brought me back to the palazzo and then coldbloodedly gone off the following night and half killed Beaumont Granville. He must never know. I was certain that if he did there would be no half measures. That would be the end of Beaumont Granville.

“You’re thoughtful.” Harriet was watching me closely. “Thinking back to long ago?

You shouldn’t brood on the past, Priscilla. You have to look ahead to the future.

I want to talk about Carlotta.”

“Oh, yes?”

“I feel she is my responsibility as well as yours. After all, I am her mother in a way. I feel my duty towards her, although you may not believe it.”

“Of course I believe it. You have always been good to her. She loves you.”

“She admires me, yes. I think we are a little alike, Carlotta and I. I’m thinking of her future. She’ll marry young.”

“She’s a child yet.”

“Some of us stop being children early.”

“She is thirteen years old.”

“How old were you, dear Priscilla, when you stayed the night on the island with your lover?”

“It was unusual circumstances.”

“Unusual circumstances are sometimes quite usual, which sounds a contradiction but is oddly true. They arise, these unusual circumstances, and catch us unaware. I am sure that a girl like Carlotta will attract such occasions as she attracts every male creature who comes within a few yards of her.”

“I agree that we shall have to be careful with her.”

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Harriet laughed. “The more careful she sees us to be, the more reckless she will become. I know her kind… none better.”

“Well, if we are going to be careful, what are we going to do?”

“We’ll guide her… with invisible hands.”

“Harriet, what do you mean?”

“I have a bridegroom for her. One I have always wanted her to have.”

“Harriet!”

“Yes, my son Benjie. He adores her … but he doesn’t really know how much yet.

Besides, he thinks she is his sister. He’ll have to discover that she is not, that she is no relation. It reminded me of you and Leigh … although he knew all along that he was not related to you. But he was brought up with you like a brother. You see, it makes a complicated situation. Suppose Leigh had not been looking on you as his dear little sister all those years, you would have been together from the start. It is Leigh you really loved. I always knew it. That idyll on the Eyot was the awakening … if you see what I mean.”

“I see, of course, but it is not necessarily true.”

“It is true. You and Leigh would have been lovers when you were fourteen … after all he was a man then. Then all those complications would not have occurred. Well, that’s all finished. Carlotta is in the picture now. I want Benjie to know that she is not his sister. It was wise of you to have told Leigh.”

“You know I couldn’t marry him without telling.”

“Of course you couldn’t, and he understood. After all he is my son. I am very happy that you and Leigh are together, Priscilla. It makes you my daughter hi a way. I could be very sentimental about that… if I were a sentimental woman. But what I am really thinking about is Carlotta’s future.”

“Somehow I could not bring myself to tell my parents.”

“Why not? Your father has not exactly lived the life of a holy monk.”

“I know it, but he has always been rather contemptuous of me. No, that’s too strong a word. He has been indifferent to me.”

“That has hurt you. There are times when I should like to give your father a talking to. He really is the most obstinate of men.”

“I shall never forget what you did for me, Harriet … you and Gregory.”

“He is a dear man and played his part well. He would do anything for me. But it is Carlotta whom we are discussing. You are not anx-226

Perhaps not, but

J

ious to disclose the truth to your parents. , there is someone else who should know.”

“You mean Benjie?”

“Yes, later. But I was thinking of Robert Frinton.”

“Robert Frinton!” I cried. “But why should he know?”

“Because the child’s father was his nephew.”

“But…”

“You are depriving the man of his family. He loves Carlotta. He is a lonely old man.

That was a terrible tragedy hi his family. Just imagine what it would mean to him to find he had a family in this enchanting child.”

“I don’t think it would be wise.”

“Why not?”

“We have guarded this secret so long. You, Leigh, Gregory, Christabel and I are the only ones…”

I stopped suddenly in horror. There was one other who knew. I saw again vividly those lascivious mocking eyes. “Posing as a virgin when all the time you were there to have your little bastard!”

Harriet had risen and put an arm about my shoulders.

“The secret will still be safe,” she said. “The only difference is that Frinton will know. Think how happy it will make hini. You owe it to him, Priscilla.”

“No,” I cried, “the fewer who know the better.”

Harriet shrugged her shoulders. “Well, I have to tell you. He knows.”

I stared at her. “You told him!”

“Yes, I told him.”

“Harriet, how could you!”

“It was my secret as well as yours. I thought it best to tell him.” She went on quickly: “What I have done is the best for everybody. He will be here shortly. I asked him to come. He wants to see you. He wants to talk to you.”

I was dumbfounded. It was no use reproaching Harriet. It was so like her to do something she wanted to and then tell about it afterwards. I wanted to shout at her: This is my affair. But that was not entirely true. She had made it hers.

It must have been an hour later when we heard the sounds of arrival. Harriet and I went down alone to greet Robert Frinton.

When he saw me he put out his arms and we were both so overcome by emotion that I went straight into them and we clung together for a few moments.

He released me and looked into my face. “You have made me so 227

happy,” he said. “So very happy. For me this is like a miracle. Something I never dreamed could possibly be. I loved the child from the first. I cannot tell you what this means to me.”

When I realized his happiness I felt reconciled to what Harriet had done.

We were together a great deal during that visit and he talked continuously about Carlotta. He had brought a gold chain with a diamond pendant for her. She delighted in it. Carlotta loved gifts and she had a passion for jewels.

Robert Frinton and I traveled back to Eversleigh together. He talked all the time of the joy it gave him to know that Carlotta was Jocelyn’s daughter.

“The fact that he fathered a child-and such a child-makes him seem less lost to me,”

he said. “How I wish it could have been in different circumstances. There is no one I would rather have seen him married to, dear Priscilla. And Carlotta delights me.

I want to watch her all the time. I want to listen to her. She is the most enchanting child that ever was. This has been like a new life to me. How I thank my good fortune that I decided to come to Enderby Hall. It was like fate, wasn’t it? And there she was in the house … in Carlotta’s cupboard. Oh, how glad I am! You need have no fear. This shall be our secret until you wish it to be divulged. I would not cause you, who have given me such wonderful happiness, one moment of grief.”

So he talked and I thought that no harm had been done. He was such a delightful man and there was no doubt that the revelation had brought him great happiness.

But when I went to see him soon after at Enderby Hall, I was more than ever aware of the sense of foreboding in that house. It was a house of shadows; there was an eeriness in spite of the bright furnishings and the smell of beeswax and turpentine which his servants used so lavishly.

When Robert appeared, the mood of the house seemed to change, but when I stood alone in the hall, I seemed to sense something evil, something which was like a warning.

I wondered whether it was the shadow of past tragedy, but somehow I could not get out of my mind the feeling that it was a warning of some impending disaster.

After that I saw a great deal of Robert. We had naturally moved closer together.

He was a frequent visitor at Eversleigh Court and I was often at Enderby Hall. He was so pathetically eager to see me,

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and Carlotta often came with me. That was indeed a red-letter day for him.

I was glad that Carlotta liked him and went out of her way to charm him. She need not have bothered, she did it effortlessly. Such was her nature that the more pleasure he showed hi her company, the more she liked him. I was glad to see that he inspired a certain gentleness in her nature which I had not noticed before. There was nothing she liked better than to serve us with coffee or chocolate, which was becoming so fashionable in the London coffeehouses. Carlotta would preside at the table and we would watch her with pride as she brought the beverages to us.

“My father and mother took tea when they were in London,” she told us. “It is a strange outlandish herb, they say. They didn’t like it much, but it is being drunk by all the notable people.”

Her eyes sparkled. I knew she longed to go to London and mingle with the notables.