The Life She Wants (25 page)

“Maybe till tonight,” she said. “I'll feel a lot better when I know Daddy's all right.”

“See what I mean,” Adam said. “He's a lucky man.”

* * *

Riley got off the elevator on the third floor. She pulled her cell phone out of her coat pocket and glanced at it. Four missed calls from Logan. She had texted him about the accident, told him everyone was fine but she was tied up and would call him later. Then she'd turned her phone off.

And she knew where her cell phone was all along.

She was relieved to see that none of Jock's family remained in the waiting room. She went into the recovery area where she'd seen Jock not ten minutes ago and there he was, sleeping off his anesthesia and pain meds, mouth open slightly. She felt tears threaten again. She walked over to his bed and gently touched his forehead. “Oh, Jock,” she whispered. “I'm the screwup. Not you.”

All those years of being angry, of being awash in pride and determined to keep Jock from ever hurting her again, she held him back, held herself back. She put her head down and worked like a maniac, single-minded in aiming to succeed in business and show them all—
I am not a bad person, am not a disloyal, betraying friend.
“All I wanted to do was keep myself safe,” she whispered to him. “To keep Maddie safe. To prove to the world I could make it without trusting anyone.”

He opened one eye and she sniffed.

“You're right about me, Jock. I was always angry. And scared. I never gave you a chance.”

He lifted his hand to where hers rested on the bed rail. “It's okay, Riley,” he rasped out. “It's going to be okay.”

“What if you'd been killed in that accident? What if I never got to say I'm sorry?”

“Shhh,” he said. “It's okay.”

“It's not really,” she said with a hiccup of emotion. “But maybe when you get better... If you think you can give me another chance, I'd like us to be friends.”

He smiled sleepily. “Okay,” he said, letting his eyes drift closed. “Boy, you really make a guy work for it, don't you?”

A huff of laughter escaped her. “It wasn't my intention.”

“What about the other guy? The new guy?” he asked, not opening his eyes.

“Not much going on there, Jock. But listen, let's not say anything to Maddie. I don't want her having fantasies about us.”

“Okay,” he said. He gave her hand a little squeeze and she bent over and put a soft kiss on his forehead.

Suddenly there was an orderly and a nurse at the bedside, interrupting them. “We're going to take Mr. Curry to his room now. You can follow us if you like, Mrs. Curry. But then you should let him sleep and come back in the morning.”

“I'm not... Okay,” she said. “I'll follow you so I know where to find him in the morning.”

Chapter Eighteen

Adam and Emma stayed in for New Year's Eve. Emma parked her car in his garage in case Riley or June drove by. “I think the point of this discretion is just about moot,” Adam said as he was taking her coat. “My mother has guessed, I think Riley has guessed and Maddie wouldn't care.”

“Still, until Riley assures me there are no longer any hard feelings between us, we will be discreet. One of the last things she said to me just before her phone chimed with Maddie's call was that she was stuck with me because of her family. She's not ready. By the way, where is Riley spending New Year's Eve?”

“She and Maddie took some snacks and a couple of board games to the hospital to spend it with Jock. I'm pretty sure they won't be allowed to stay until midnight but they're keeping him company tonight.”

“Aw, that must make him very happy. He'd probably risk another car accident to get this much attention from Riley.”

“Now, why would you say that?” Adam asked.

“I think he cares for her very much. I think he might love her. The way he talked about Riley and Maddie, about how he screwed up with Riley... It just sounded like he has deeper feelings than he lets on in front of you.” She put her arms around Adam's waist and looked up at him. “Do you ever think about ways things could've been different?”

“Like how?” he asked, really wanting her perspective.

“Well, Jock could've started dating Riley in the first place. Then I think we would all have remained friends. But Riley might not have built her business—I get the impression she did it out of survival. Or I could have come back here after college and fallen in love with you ten years ago.”

He stroked her cheek with the back of his knuckles. “Are you in love with me now?”

She nodded. “Pretty much. It all hangs on what you feed me tonight.”

“If I'd known that I would have tried harder. I have a big assortment of finger foods—your favorite crab balls, stuffed mushrooms, a cheese ball and no dog present, spinach/artichoke dip and a veggie tray.”

She put her arms around his neck. “My absolute favorites. You're a shoo-in. But, Adam, when do you think you'll fall in love right back?”

“Emma, I've been in love with you since I was eighteen. I'm just waiting for you to get your life back so you can share it with me.”

“Well, I didn't expect this, you know. I thought I'd be spending my Saturday nights with my gay boyfriend and his jealous partner, looking for work all the time and trying to forget the debacle that was my marriage.”

“I don't know if you'll ever forget it,” he said. “We can move on in spite of it. Are you finally over the idea that being with you will hurt me?”

“I'm still worried that it might, but I'm now convinced I couldn't change your mind if I tried. There has been yet one more complication, one more piece of unfinished business I have to deal with. I'm going to see Rosemary tomorrow. She asked Lauren to get in touch with me. It seems Rosemary can't die in peace without seeing me and she's come back to Santa Rosa to die. She's in the house that had belonged to my father.”

“And you're going to do it?” he asked.

“I am. Maybe I'm crazy but I'm hoping that since she asked for me, staring death in the face has made her kinder. But honestly? I'm scared to death. Our last words weren't very nice.”

“Let me go with you,” he said.

“You are my champion,” she said. “That's what Riley called you, ‘my champion.' Lyle also offered, but I told him no. You I might take along. I always feel a little braver with you around.”

* * *

The house Emma grew up in was now about forty years old and because it was a custom home built on a large lot, it had held up handsomely. It was, she remembered, one of the best homes in the area, at least in the parish where her Catholic school was located. Compared to some of the homes Emma had cleaned lately, it seemed ordinary, but it wasn't. It was a large five-bedroom, three-bath home decorated in Country French style. With its huge kitchen, spacious master bedroom and bath, and twelve-foot ceilings, it had been considered very much upscale forty years ago. The curb appeal was still there; the house was very attractive with its well-maintained lawn, shrubbery and a couple of formidable trees, sitting on a wide street with well-spaced homes.

Of course Emma didn't have many good memories of the place. She was not Rosemary's child. Rosemary introduced Anna and Lauren as her daughters, Emma as her stepdaughter.

“I've never been in the house,” Adam said.

“Never? How is that possible?”

“If I came to fetch Riley and walk her home, I waited on the stoop.”

“I never noticed. But that doesn't surprise me. Let's get this over with.”

At first Emma wasn't sure which of her sisters opened the door as they looked very much alike and she hadn't seen them in a few years. It took her a moment to realize it was Lauren for not only did she look tired and ashen but she'd gained about a hundred pounds. And then right behind her was Anna, thirty-seven now and morbidly obese. They both looked entirely miserable, but how should they look, knowing their mother was dying?

The house was cluttered and held a strange smell. Dust, chemical cleaners, perhaps death.

“Happy holidays,” Emma said, presenting Lauren with a gift basket filled with salami, cheeses, olives, wine and other goodies, like chocolate.

Lauren didn't thank her but took the basket and left it on the table in the foyer. “Come with me,” she said, turning so they could follow.

They went in the direction of the master bedroom where Rosemary lay in a hospital bed rather than the bed that had been in there. Rosemary had always been heavyset but now she was shockingly thin, her color a bit jaundiced and her hair extremely sparse. All that sudden weight loss left her face sagging. There were bottles and vials on the dresser, an IV hooked up to her arm, and the room was messy with medical supplies. Her bible lay on the bed beside her. Rosemary's eyes were closed.

“Rosemary?” Emma said, merely breathing her name.

She opened her eyes. “Oh. It's you.”

“Lauren said you wanted to see me.”

“Yes. Who is that? Another man so soon?” Rosemary asked weakly.

“It's Adam Kerrigan. You remember him. Riley's brother.” She looked around the room. “Rosemary, where is Vince?”

“Vince isn't here. He didn't sign on for this.”

Emma actually grimaced. She hadn't liked Vince at all but hadn't they been married quite a long time for him to bail out on her like that?

“So, you turned your lawyer on me,” Rosemary said.

“No,” Emma said, shaking her head. “Mr. Justice was my father's lawyer and helped him with his will. He offered to—”

“I am the trustee of my late husband's estate and I want you to know what to expect. Your father left some money in a trust. It was left up to me to distribute with discretion. I have my own lawyer. He'll tell your lawyer if there's anything to distribute, but I highly doubt it. Then we have no further business. And I forgive you.”

Emma's mouth hung open. “You forgive me for
what
?
”

“For being an ungrateful brat. For bringing shame on our family with your scandal. For never appreciating your good fortune. I'm going to die in peace, knowing I did everything I could and more than necessary.”

Emma had to bite her lip to keep it from trembling. So, Rosemary had seized one last moment to be cruel. “And the house?”

“It belongs to my daughters now.”

“My father's house,” Emma said weakly. It was not a mansion by any means but California real estate was valuable. Just guessing, she would think a custom home this size on such a generous piece of property would go for a great deal of money.

“It became my house,” Rosemary said.

“You've never mentioned money before,” Emma said. “You said there wasn't any.”

“It was a modest amount. There was no reason to discuss it,” she said. Then she winced as if in pain. “I was given discretion to use it for the children responsibly, and I did.”

“You didn't use any on me,” Emma pointed out.

“You were married to a millionaire!” Rosemary screeched, which sent her into a coughing fit. Lauren came rushing to her side. She held her mother up until she recovered. Then she gently lowered her again.

“I was sixteen when my father died,” Emma said. “I paid for college with scholarships, part-time work and loans. You remarried...”

“You don't need it now,” Lauren said bitterly.

“My father built this house,” Emma said.

“He left it to me and it has been transferred into my daughters' names. I want you to tell your lawyer this business is finished, that we have nothing more to discuss. I want to be at peace with this. Please tell your lawyer that you're satisfied everything is settled and stop pursuing this idiocy. Leave my poor girls what little I left them and go away. Don't be picking my bones like a selfish brat.”

“Stop,” Adam said. “Stop it right now. I'm sorry for your ill health, Rosemary, but I think you've abused this woman enough. It's over.” Adam turned Emma around. “We should leave. There's nothing more to discuss here.”

“I just want to leave peacefully knowing you won't visit your vengeance on my daughters,” Rosemary said.

Emma just shook her head. “Why would I?”

“Knowing you, you think you deserve everything. You've always been haughty, miss homecoming queen. Don't steal what I left for my daughters.”

Adam just shook his head. “Let's go, Emma. You wouldn't want this house. The meanness has seeped into the walls by now.” He looked at Rosemary with a frown.

Adam took Emma's hand and pulled her away. “Don't listen to her anymore, Emma. These people are poisoned with envy. Come on.”

She let him pull her to the car and help her inside.

She sat still, saying nothing, stricken. He started the car and began to drive away and still she was silent. A good five minutes passed before she spoke. “I thought I was beyond being surprised by them. I thought I was beyond being hurt. She must hate me so much. Why does she hate me so much?”

“I think Rosemary might hate a lot of people. At the least, I think very few people are cherished by her. Emma, you can walk away from them knowing you were very kind. More kind than I would've been. I think that woman stole from a grief-stricken child. I wouldn't want to be where she's going.”

“She might meet Richard where she's going—his values were similar, I think.”

* * *

The following week Emma finally met with Lucinda Lopez again.

“It's been over two weeks,” Lucinda said. “Your first Christmas in your hometown in at least ten years.”

“More than that,” Emma said. “More like a dozen. It didn't take me too many years after my father's death to see that my stepmother and sisters didn't really want me to interrupt their celebration. But it's a whole new life now—a simpler, quieter life. There was a little excitement here and there.” Emma told Lucinda first about Bethany and how she seemed much brighter and stronger now that the holiday was past.

“That's very kind of you to take the time to listen to this troubled girl,” Lucinda said. “Would you do something for me? If you think she trusts you, will you please promote the idea of her talking to her counselor? And if her counselor isn't helping her, suggest she ask for a new one or talk to someone at school. Kids that age who have suffered loss are feeling isolated and fragile. And they're very unpredictable. I don't want you to find yourself up against a situation you can't handle. The loser could be the girl.”

“Yes,” she said. “Yes, of course. Can I suggest you?”

“You can suggest me, sure. In fact, you're welcome to tell her you're seeing a counselor. Sometimes that has a positive effect. I just worry when someone who has been depressed suddenly becomes cheerful.”

Emma then told her about her visit with Rosemary and her plea that Emma leave her daughters and their inheritance alone. “My father's been gone for eighteen years and while we were comfortable, he wasn't a rich man. I can't imagine there's much, if anything. And I'm not going to stir up the curious press by going after money. In fact, I don't want to hear the word
money
associated with my name in any way.”

“You'll do whatever makes you comfortable, Emma. I would like you to think about one thing. What your father had in his will was his ardent wish. If he willed something to you, he meant for you to have it.”

“I understand that. But it was meant for college. He told me when I was just a little girl that he was saving for college. Well, college was paid for a long time ago.”

“And you just had a very simple, very quiet holiday. Much different from what you've experienced the past decade, I suppose.”

“I spent Christmas Eve and Christmas morning with Adam, who is more wonderful than you can imagine. He had dinner with his family at his mother's house then came back to my little bungalow, bringing the best leftovers. I had to work the next morning but he's off—Christmas break. He gave me a beautiful trench coat and I gave him a sweater and slippers. Lucinda, it was perfection. So peaceful. All the stress of the world was somewhere else for a change. No flashy baubles, no fancy parties.”

“None of that filthy lucre,” Lucinda joked. “After some of the Christmases you've experienced in past years, how did it compare?”

“I've never felt richer,” Emma said.

* * *

Jock was released from the hospital after a few days but would not be cleared for work until after his next visit with the doctor ten days post-surgery. His mother wanted him to come home with her but he flatly refused. His mother said she would stay with him at his house and he said, “Oh, just shoot me.” Riley witnessed all of this as she and Maddie were at the hospital visiting at the time.