The Lieutenant's Promise (11 page)

“The rebel soldiers are watching me,” she’d explained. “I have to be careful about how long I stay.”

He was awake when she brought him some bread, still warm from the oven, along with the daily can of milk. “Oh, good. I am getting my appetite back, I fear,” he said as he sat up.

She handed him the bread, scooped a small jar into the milk and handed it to him. “I heard the last of the men are leaving the house today. You can come sleep in Tom’s bed. Ma said Harvey can sleep with her.”

The news cheered him. “It’ll be nice to see everyone again, and look at something other than these stone walls. I need to get my strength back so I can return to my company.”

Em’s eyebrows pulled together. “Must you return? You should be discharged because of your injury. We can take the wagon to Rolla so you can request it.”

He cupped her face with his palm. “I know you worry, but my work with the army isn’t done.”

“You could have died! Is that the only way you’ll see that it’s finished?”

She didn’t understand the drive he felt to keep the Union whole. He couldn’t walk away from the fight now. Sure, he still had headaches often, but those would pass, he was certain. “I don’t claim to be invincible, but I don’t believe I will die in battle.”

“You almost did.” Her voice grew thick. “You don’t know what I’ve been through. How each time I came in here, I placed my hand on your chest to be certain you still breathed. I didn’t nurse you and keep you safe from the Confederates so you could run out and get shot again.”

She burst into tears. Levi pulled her into his arms. “Shhh. I’m all right now, thanks to you. I’ll be forever grateful to you for saving my life.” He stroked her hair while she cried herself out.

When she’d slowed to just sniffles, she cleared her throat and spoke again. “I’m sorry. That was rude of me. I was only thinking of you while I took care of you, not of myself. I can’t tell you what to do with your life. If you feel you belong in the army, I have to let you go.”

He lifted her chin so she had to meet his gaze. “Where I feel I belong is with you. But if the Confederate states have their way, Missouri will be under their laws. I want us to get married, have a family, and I don’t want to raise our children in a place where people are allowed to own other people.”

Her eyes had grown wide as she listened.

“I love you, Emily Gilmore. I did even before you saved my life. Say you will marry me when the fighting is done.”

Em’s face lit up. “Yes, of course I will. I love you, too. I can’t imagine any other life than beside you.”

Unable to keep his joy inside, Levi pressed his lips to hers, sealing their love.

~*~

With the rebels gone, Em, Maggie and Billy set about repairing the farm. Levi did what he could, more each day, but he was nowhere near his old self. He grew tired so easily, and his head would throb after an hour or two in the sun.

Jasper moved back into his room in the barn and did a majority of the heavy work. Levi was immensely grateful to him.

As he sat in the shade one afternoon with Em and Billy, Levi asked, “What will you do about chickens and pigs?”

“I’ll ask Mr. Harris the next time I’m in town. It’s possible some of the farms around weren’t raided. Some might have an extra couple of hens and a rooster they could part with, and by next spring we’ll have enough layers to sell eggs again.”

“What about pigs?”

“Same thing. We’ll ask around and buy a few. I’ll miss Cletus’ stud fees, but it can’t be helped until we have a good boar again.”

They took the wagon to town the next day. It was the first time Levi had been off the farm since the battle at Oak Hill. They traveled in the opposite direction from the hill, which came as some relief. Levi hadn’t remembered how he’d been shot, or much of the battle itself, and feared seeing the location would revive those memories.

Mr. Harris was relieved to see Em. “I heard they fought on your farm and took it over. I feared the worst.”

She grimaced. “For the most part they were respectful, but our crops are ruined, and the chickens and pigs gone.”

“I have some seed in the back room I can let you have. You can get a few fall crops in. With luck, we’ll have a late start to winter.” Mr. Harris thumbed through his record book. “You have some credit, still. What can I get for you? Did those soldiers leave you any food?”

“Thank you. We have what was in the springhouse,” she said. “And there was a ham left in the smokehouse. Let me have some dried beans and we’ll stretch that out a while.”

She looked around the store. “Flour, eggs if you have them, please. And baking powder. We have jam but no biscuits to eat it with.”

Levi walked over to the display of candy sticks. “Let me have half a dozen of these. And some licorice.”

“We can’t afford—”

He held up a hand to stop her. “I have money of my own and I wish to treat you all. It’s the least I can do. “I shall pay for my purchases now, Mr. Harris. We need a few tins of meat and vegetables. Some coffee and sugar. Oh, and molasses.”

“Give me a few minutes and I’ll have it ready for you.” Mr. Harris began gathering the items.

“Would you know if anyone has a chicken or two they can spare? And piglets for sale?” Em asked.

“Well, the Edwards and the Stonebridges are in the same shape you are. But most of the other farms were untouched. I’ll ask around and have someone send them your way.”

“I’d appreciate it,” she said.

Levi fully expected her to argue on the ride back to the farm, berate him for spending his money on them, but she kept silent. That was as it should be. Her family had taken care of him for so long, this made only a small dent toward repaying them.

“Will you be able to plant anything he gave you before spring?” Levi asked, mainly to break the drawn-out quiet.

“We can cut up some of the seed potatoes to plant, and the peas and carrots should be able to be ready to harvest before we get frost. If we get an early snow, we might lose them all.”

“Let’s hope for a late winter.” He hoped they would have enough food to last them until next year’s harvest. They could hunt for meat, but stew and biscuits became dull after a while. He knew that from being in the army as long as he had.

Early the next morning, he joined Em, Jasper and Billy in the field, where they walked the rows while hunched over, sticking pieces of potato into the dirt. His back ached, and having his head down that way made it pound. He straightened at the end of the row and stretched.

A wave of dizziness hit him hard. Having nothing to grab ahold of, he staggered a few steps.

“Are you all right?” Em asked, rushing to his side.

“I’m fine,” he lied. If he moved his head in the slightest, the field would spin. “It’s probably the humid air. I’ll go sit in the shade a bit.”

“Billy,” Em said, “Go fetch the lieutenant some water.”

The boy took off running.

Jasper walked closely beside Levi, but thankfully didn’t insist on supporting him. A man needed to protect his pride. Levi was tired of being weak. It was time he went back to his company. It was likely no longer his company. They’d have assigned another lieutenant to take over his duties.

He was honest with himself, however. Rolla was at least one hundred and thirty miles away. It would take days to walk there, even when he was stronger. He didn’t mind staying with Em, but not if he couldn’t pull his own weight.

Lowering himself to sit against the tree, he caught Em’s eye. “I’m sorry.”

“For what?” She sat a few feet away, her legs curled under her skirt.

“I’m causing you more work. I should be able to alleviate some of what you’re required to do, not add to it.”

She motioned to her hired hand, who’d gone back to planting. “With Jasper back, I have even less to do than when Tom was here. The primary job at hand for you is to heal.”

“It’s taking so long. I’m rarely sick. I’m not used to lying around.”

“It won’t be much longer. Your color is so much better. Your strength will return, too.”

Another two weeks dragged by before Levi was able to work for any length of time without getting dizzy or having his head pound. He’d been able to hide the dizzy spells from Em. He hated making her worry. She had so much to worry about without him.

One evening after supper when the air had cooled slightly, Levi asked Em if she’d like to walk. “I must get used to walking longer distances. Will you come with me?”

“I’d love to.”

“Can I come?” Susie asked, bouncing to her feet from her chair.

“Why don’t you stay and help me read to Harvey?” Ma offered. “He gets tired of hearing my voice all day.”

“All right,” Susie whined. “But I’d rather go walking.”

“We’ll go tomorrow,” Maggie said. “We can see if the paw paws are ripening.”

Levi caught Em mouthing
thank you
to Maggie. He wished he could add his own thanks, but it wouldn’t be proper.

The sky was still light, the air warm and thick. He led the way toward the road, remembering to pace himself. Distance rather than speed, at least for the time being. Speed would come.

“Have you thought about returning to the army?” Em asked.

“I think about it daily. Will I be strong enough? When will I be strong enough? Will your family have enough food to make it through the winter?”

Em laughed lightly. “With one less mouth to feed, it’ll last longer. Oh, you know I’m teasing. You’re welcome here as long as you care to stay.”

“I know, and I’m grateful. Your family has been so good to me.”

“What of your family? I know you’ve written them, but I’d think you’d want to see them before marching off again somewhere.”

“I do.” He sighed. “But I have no way of getting there with the Confederates being in Springfield. I can’t catch a stage. I can’t buy a horse at the stables in the city, either. If I’m seen, even wearing Tom’s clothes, they’ll either enlist me or take me prisoner as a yank. I need to make my way to Rolla, report to Major Clanton, and request permission to return home until I’m fully recovered.”

“I doubt anyone around here has a horse to sell. Most were probably lucky to hang on to the ones they had.”

He nodded.

“Perhaps I can go to Springfield for you. Or I can send Jasper. Do you have the money for a horse?”

Levi rubbed his shoulder, which still ached at odd times. “I like the idea of you going alone to Springfield only slightly more than sending Jasper. It wouldn’t be safe for him. You shouldn’t have too much trouble, though.”

“I can take Billy with me. It wouldn’t be out of the ordinary for someone to need a horse these days.”

“We’re assuming the rebels have left any available.”

“They must have,” Em said. “The stage needs them.”

“Exactly. Any that aren’t owned by the coaching company have probably been appropriated by the army.”

“It won’t hurt to try. As much as I want you to stay, your mother and sisters need to see you are healthy.”

“Well, somewhat healthy.” Thinking of his family made him look to the future, when the southern states had been made to realize their folly in thinking to secede. When he and Em could marry. “My mother will love you. My sisters, too. We’ll want to travel there after we’re married. Perhaps in the winter, when your family can spare us.”

She looked up at him, her face free of the tension he often saw there. “Spare us? You want to remain here, on the farm?”

“I want to be wherever you are. I’ve come to like it here. Perhaps we can build a house of our own in the clearing to the south. Maybe even buy more land, make the farm even bigger. If Tom and I both work here, we can make it profitable someday.”

“I’d like that. Having our own house, staying close to Ma. I worry about her.”

“She’ll be happy.”

“She has been lately.” Em looped her arm through his, the first time she’d taken a move like that on her own. “Before you and Tom went back to Springfield she began to smile more often. She didn’t sing, or read to Harvey until you arrived. Maggie or I did it, and then Susie when she learned.”

“I’m glad she’s doing well. It must have been hard on her to lose your father. Hard on all of you.”

“It was. I believe that’s why I’m so fearful of you going back into battle. I couldn’t bear to lose you. That’s why…that’s why I made you promise to keep yourself safe.”

He pressed her arm against his side. “As I said, if it’s within my power to do so, I will return to you and we’ll spend our lives together.”

CHAPTER ELEVEN

September 30, 1861

Em watched Levi tie his bedroll and haversack onto the back of the saddle. She’d succeeded in buying him a horse. Old though it was, it should get him to Rolla where he could take a train to St. Louis. Of course, that assumed his superior officers agreed he wasn’t well enough to return to service yet.

Was she wicked to pray they decided he couldn’t return at all?

Her family stood on the porch behind her to see him off. For Ma’s sake, Em tried to be strong and not cry. For Levi’s, too. She wanted him to be proud of her, to tell Tom how well she’d borne his departure.