The Legacy (40 page)

Adagio takes a drive up the Blue Ridge Parkway, hoping
to clear his head and gain some clarity. As he cruises up the
scenic byway, he is even more amazed at the beauty of North
Carolina. The leaves have changed to their various colors of
red, yellow, and orange, and the air is rich with the feeling of
fall. He spots a view area off the side of the road and quickly
pulls over. Getting out, he leans against the car and gazes down
into the vast tree covered valley, feeling like he is looking at a
depth-filled painting.

This is amazing!
He wishes he could share this view with
his family, especially Cisely. How he misses the special times
they shared! Closing his eyes, he lets his thoughts drift back to
last year when he and Cisely took a week long trip to Rome and
Tuscany. Sam and his wife took care of Ingo and Phillip at their
own home, so it was just the two of them. They spent their
days sightseeing and shopping. They had picnics out in the
countryside and took walks along the shore. They dined at
elegant restaurants, saw plays and went for romantic moonlit
walks through the city. Even though he’d been to the two cities
before, exploring them with Cisely was like seeing them for the
first time. From the coliseum to the museums, everything
excited her and it was like he was seeing it all anew through her
eyes.

Blinking rising tears away, he remembers how they stayed
up all night their last night in Rome, making love and talking
endlessly. There was nothing and no one for them to think
about except each other, and they treasured each and every
second. He marveled at how good their marriage was. It can be
that way again, of this he is certain.

He stands for a few minutes longer, lost in the memories.
At the moment they are all he has.
Getting back into the car, he drives off with a prayer in
his heart that they will find Phillip so their family will be whole
again.

I cling to the bear Ingo has given me as tears fall down
my face. I love my little boy so much and feel awful for not
being there for him more through this whole ordeal, but I don’t
know how to rid my heart of these terrible feelings. Fear and
despair consume my entire being to the point that I can’t think
of anything other than my own grief. And every time I think
about what I'm putting Adagio through, my heart aches even
more. He is my husband and needs me. Why can’t I give him
the comfort he needs? Why can’t I let him comfort me? I
desperately want to, and I crave the closeness we've always
shared.

I can’t
even
remember
the
last
time
I showed him
affection. He told me he needs me, but I've only felt my own
pain. My oldest son needs his mother. I manage to see to his
physical needs,
yet
I remain
emotionally
detached.
Ingo's
brother is missing and he needs my comfort. He needs my
assurance that everything will be okay. Why can’t I give it to
him? Over and over I've reminded myself it's not the trial that
is important but what I do with it. And what have I done? I let
it completely consume me.

Weeping, my soul cries out, desperately yearning to be
freed from the cage around it and my heart. Trembling, I fall to
my knees by the side of the bed. Never have I felt so lost. I
close my eyes and slowly pray. I am so sorry for the way I've
been and for not being there for my family. I plead for the
strength to endure this trial. I plead for comfort.

Over and over I plead, determined to stay on my knees
for as long as it takes. I need to feel whole again, not only for
myself, but for my family as well. And they need me to be
whole. Especially Adagio.

“Your husband needs you, Cisely. He loves you more than you
know.”
I gasp. The voice comes from nowhere. It is faint but
familiar as my own. I haven't heard it in years, but I could never
forget the sound of it.
It is Ingo's voice. With this discovery, my tears are
renewed tenfold, because I know that not only is God listening,
but the love Adagio and I share truly is the forever kind.

Pressing her forehead against the cool windowpane,
Jessica closes her eyes as her thoughts linger on Cisely.
She loves Cisely so much and hates to see her hurting this
way. But she can only imagine what she is going through.
Jessica has never had children of her own, and she loves Ingo
and Phillip as only a grandmother can. It hurts to think of
Phillip being out in the world somewhere, kept from his family
and suffering who knows what. But her feelings are those of a
grandmother. Cisely had given birth to him and is connected to
him in a way no one else could ever be.
Jessica smiles as memories of Cisely and Adagio’s two
month long visit to Utah two years ago comes to mind. At the
time, Phillip and Ingo were three and four. She remembers how
amazed she was at how well Cisely and Adagio were able to
keep up with the rambunctious little boys. She was exhausted
just watching them as they played together. Jessica thinks of the
happiness that radiated from Cisely every time she gazed at
Adagio and their children. She was living the life she was born
to live.

Jessica went out to the back yard that evening after clearing away
the last of the picnic dinner they all shared and found Adagio and Cisely
dancing barefoot in the grass to a soft ballad playing on the portable stereo.
As she quietly watched the two gazing into each other’s eyes, she concluded
there was enough love between them to cover the globe and light up the
world.

A few weeks later on Halloween, Adagio crept up behind Cisely
dressed in a Gorilla suit. Cisely jumped across the room and screamed so
loud, Jessica thought she would have a heart attack. The boys laughed as
their father chased their mother around the kitchen. Cisely giggled when he
finally cornered her and began tickling her. Then when he pulled the mask
off and pick her up and kissed her, the children clapped. Cisely whispered
something in his ear and he grinned widely before kissing her again and
putting her down. He flashed Jessica a wicked grin before putting the mask
back on and she immediately took off running with Ingo and Phillip right
behind her. She could hear Adagio growling as he chased her through the
house.

Jessica wipes her eyes, smiling at the memory.
What a
marvelous time we had!
She turns from the living room window as Cisely emerges
from the hallway. Though her eyes are red and swollen, Jessica
immediately notices the peace shining through them. Cisely
smiles and Jessica gives her a teary smile in return. She holds
her hands out and Cisely takes them.

She releases a soft sob as she embraces me and tells me
she's grateful to have me back. “I’m so glad you’re all right.”
Drawing back, I look into her loving face. “Thank you,
Jessica, for all you have done for me. Thank you for being here,
for loving me so much, and for again being my mother when
I've needed one, even though I couldn’t see that.”
“I wouldn’t want to be anywhere else, my dear.” She
presses a gentle hand to my cheek. “You and your family mean
more to me than you could ever know.”
I hug her again and draw back, concern creasing my
brow. “Did Adagio say where he was going or when he would
be back?”
“He didn’t say either. I’m sorry, dear.” She pauses a
moment. “But he did say to tell you he loves you more than
anything.”
I smile sadly as a tangible ache fills me. “Oh, Jessica, I
have been so awful to him and he has been trying so hard. He’s
been hurting just as much as I have, probably more because of
me, but I couldn’t see past my own grief.” My voice breaks
along with my heart. “He has needed me and I haven’t been
there for him. For the first time in our marriage, I haven’t been
there for him.” Hanging my head, I let the tears fall. “I feel so
ashamed. How could I do that to him?”
Jessica wipes my tears. “He loves you more than life,
Cisely, and he knows how hard this has been for you. He also
knows you love him.”
Walking over to the window, I look down the tree-clad
street as my insides churn with regret. “I have to make it up to
him,” I say, turning to Jessica. “I need to set things right
between us.”
She smiles. “You two need an evening alone to reconnect
and I’ve got just the solution.”
“Really?”
“Yes. Velma and Ted offered to take Ingo for the night
and give you and Adagio a little break. They invited me to
come along. I was going to mention it to you earlier, but I
didn’t know how you would feel.”
“I think that would be perfect!”
“Good. I’ll call Velma and let her know. She and Ted
were pretty excited about the idea. I think they are looking
forward to having children of their own. They certainly do
enjoy spoiling your son.”
“They will make great parents.”
“I think they will too.” Jessica looks at her watch. “Well,
I’ll go and call them now.” She smiles, squeezing my hand. “I’m
so happy you are all right.”
“So am I, Jessica. So am I.”

Gladys sits in an over-sized leather chair smoking a
cigarette, her free hand holding a tall can of beer. Closing her
glazed eyes, she smiles contentedly, thinking about Cisely and
what she must be feeling now. Gladys imagines the grief she's
probably experiencing and relishes the thought. Picturing her
niece crying and falling apart makes her smile take on an even
more
demented appearance.
Gladys
wants
her
niece
to
experience pain, and she is sure Cisely is doing just that. She
intends to make her suffer for as long as possible.

She releases a low, throaty chuckle, completely pleased
with herself. Turning her beer up and downing the last swallow,
she sneers, realizing the can is now empty. If there is one thing
Gladys can’t stand, it is an empty beer can or liquor bottle.

“Sadie,” she calls to the kitchen. “Will you bring me
another beer?”
A
minute
later,
a
young
brown-skinned woman
of
nineteen
enters
the
front
room,
which
is
only
lit
by
the
television, and hands her another can. Gladys looks up at the
thin woman and takes the beer, not offering a thank you. “Has
the boy eaten anything?”
“Not today. I’m taking something to him now. He’s
stubborn sometimes and refuses to eat, but by night time, he’s
usually so hungry he gives in.”
“Well, it don’t matter none to me. It saves me money.”

You mean it saves me money,
Sadie voices silently.
You’ve never
paid a dime for anything.
She looks at Gladys, her disgust for the
woman evident, though Gladys doesn’t seem to notice. She
wouldn’t have cared anyway. The only person Gladys is ever
interested in pleasing or even cares about, is Gladys.

Heading to the kitchen to dish up a plate of spaghetti for
the boy, Sadie silently wonders how she ever let herself get into
this situation.