The Kingdom Land (6 page)

John let him be and continued to stir his coffee.

“
I think all that sugar is probably
dissolved by now,” Erik broke the silence between them.

“
Never can be too sure.”

“
You must think I'm a nut or
something, sitting here all beat up, and then not really answering
your question when I'm the one that started this conversation.” The
silence didn't last long this time.

“
It was Christ. I think. I've sat in
church every Sunday my aunt and uncle could get me there, but last
night was the first time I really spoke with Him. He seemed to be
there and be a Him, a person, rather than a sermon.”

“
What did you two have to talk
about?”

“
Nothing really, and everything. I
got in this dumb fight over some dumb girl that I thought I'd like
to get to know. She made it obvious she didn't want anything to do
with me. After I got literally thrown out of the bar, I didn't have
any place to go. I parked in my old pickup in the middle of a
prairie in the middle of no where, and I asked Him for help and to
forgive me for avoiding Him for so long.”

“
Sounds like the right place to
start. Do you think Christ heard you?” John asked.

“
I know He did. I can't explain it,
but I know He did.

“
Before last night I thought I knew
about God. He was up there in heaven somewhere. I thought I knew
about Christians; that they were just dreamers. But now, it's
different. I sat there in my pickup and He was there with me.
There's a lot I need to rethink, and I don't know where to start. I
just know things are different.”

Erik had turned straight ahead staring into his
coffee as he spoke. “I guess the most amazing fact was I was
actually talking to Him. I've known about Him for years, but last
night was the first night I actually talked with Him. And then–I
don't even know how to explain it, but He answered me. There
weren't any actual words, but I know He was there, and His arms
seemed to wrap me in His warmth. It's strange, but I know He was
there.” Erik continued to look down, but he no longer talked.

“
I'm sure He was, Erik.” He heard
John's words, but still didn't look at him. “Anytime anyone admits
they need His help and turns to Him, He'll be there. When a person
admits they need Him, He answers them just like He did for you. We
all need Him, and without Him it's hopeless. We think we can get by
okay without Him, but we keep coming to dead ends. Sounds to me
like that fight was your dead end.”

“
The fight made me realize some
things. I've lived on empty dreams, and never faced the facts. I
used to think Christians were dreamers, but I did the same thing,
but my dreams were empty. I had to admit I'm just a nobody, and
last night that was pretty clear.”

“
Maybe before you felt like a
nobody, but now you're God's child.” John quickly corrected
Erik.

Erik swiveled his stool back to John. Erik no longer
held back, asking question he had asked himself in the middle of no
where in the ‘54 Chevy pickup. The more he talked the easier it
became.

“
I've been to church before with my
aunt and uncle, but I never realized what it was to have God answer
me like He did last night. When my aunt and uncle talked about
Christ they were talking about someone who lived a long time ago in
a place half way across the world. He didn't affect my life. He was
for others. But not for me.”

“
Now that I know that He is near, I
don't know where to go from here. It was so simple to just talk to
God last night, but now I don't know how to act. I've always
thought being Christian just meant rules of things to do and things
not to do. It seems like the Christians I've known are caught in a
maze trying to find God. They follow all these rules trying to come
to the end of the maze and find God, but I never heard one say God
was simply there with them. I felt like they knew God was at the
end, but they would always have to do more and try harder because
they weren't good enough. If they couldn't do it, why should I even
try? It was just too hard to work my way through that maze. Now I
want to be a Christian and follow God. I feel like I've found God,
but there's still that maze. How do I make sure I don't come to a
dead end? Do I go back to the entrance of the maze and all the
rules or what? Where do I start?”

The waitress laid the two plates before each of them.
“I hate to interrupt, but is there anything else you need? Do you
want any hot sauce or catsup?” she asked Erik.

“
No, that's fine.”

With the waitress' interruption, Erik became
conscious again that they weren't alone but in a full restaurant
and he was saying too much in front of too many. He looked around.
No one was listening. It seemed as though the groups were more
concerned with their breakfast than listening to what Erik had to
say.

John picked up the pepper and put a heavy dose on
every item on his plate, including the catsup.

“
Erik, as simple as it was last
night, it needs to be that simple for the rest of your life. Never
forget that He came to you, and all you had to do is ask. There
were no magic words or a secret handshake. There was His love for
you. The simple fact is He had been waiting for you to ask for
help. When you asked for help and recognized Him, He reached out
and held you. You didn't need to search for Christ and Christ
didn't have to search for you in a maze. He had never been far
away. He is the one who was calling out to you and you finally
answered His call. He's not hiding for only a few to find. He is
going after you. Your fight last night didn't shock God. Do you
think I'm sitting next to you by accident? You need to know I'm
here because He cares about you, and is looking out after you,”
John explained.

“
I can see that,” Erik interrupted
John in his eagerness to ask his next question. “But why are there
so many rules in the church. I know all about the Ten Commandments,
but it seems like there's ten thousand other things Christian can
and can't do. Don't smoke. Give you money to the church. Don't look
at a girl in the wrong way. You name it, there seems to be a rule
about it.”

“
It's not as complex as it seems.
Jesus said in the book of Mark, ‘To love him with all your heart,
and with all your understanding and with all your strength, and to
love one's neighbor as yourself is more important than all burnt
offerings and sacrifices.' That's not complex. That's just living
with God and the people around you and putting them first rather
than yourself. If you make it too complex, you're right, you're
caught in a maze and you'll never be able to find your way out
amidst all your questions. Don't put your focus on the maze. Put
you focus on Him. See how He came to you and simply remember how He
embraced you when you called.”

“
But I still don't know. How can it
be that simple? How can one night with God make Jesus want me? I'm
not really that much of a likable guy, and I haven't done anything
for Jesus to want to accept me.” Erik wasn't about to quit until he
had some grasp of the situation.

The man to Erik's left reached across him to the
creamer that sat directly in front of Erik. “Excuse me,” he said,
“but I can't drink my coffee straight.”

“
No problem.” Erik pushed the
creamer closer to the man and almost appreciated the
interruption.

“
How's your bacon and eggs?” John
briefly changed the subject.

“
Fine, but I was so hungry,
cardboard would taste good right now.” The two concentrated on
their breakfast in silence for a time before John
continued.

“
Erik, you said you weren't that
much of a likable guy. No one, no matter how likable or unlikable
they are, is good enough to be on the same level as God. He didn't
come to us because we had earned His presence, but because He loved
us. It's His love that allows us to be with God, not what we've
done. That maze you talk about is something men create in their own
minds. It's not God's maze. It's an important thing to know He paid
the price by His coming to this world and dying on the cross.
There's no more maze. There's only free access to God for those who
love Him. If anyone wants to try to find God in a maze, they won't.
He's here to be found if only you accept His lordship and His love.
You can't earn Christ's love…”

“
Yeah, I know. I've never been good
at earning someone's love.” Erik interrupted John in mid-sentence.
“My dad died when I was young. I always wanted to prove myself to
him, but it never happened and now it never can. I couldn't do
anything right in his eyes, and I guess I thought God was the same
way. I wanted to prove to both of them I was good
enough.”

“
Erik, you did what almost everyone
tries to do. They want to get by without God and do things
themselves.”

“
But if God loves me that much,”
Erik said, “I'm afraid I will still disappoint Him, and it will be
worse now that I know Him. I also know now that he knows all about
me so He'll know it when I fail. I mean, there seems to be so many
‘do's and don'ts' in Christianity. What happens if I blow it after
I know He's real?”

“
You're right. He knows you and
everything about you. He knows you aren't perfect. That is why the
price He paid on the cross allows grace to cover our mistakes.
You're His kid; He looks at you with love and forgives your
mistakes if you ask Him. His love for you is constant.

“
But let me talk about those ‘do's
and don'ts'. Remember, they all come down to loving God with your
whole heart and soul and loving your neighbor as yourself. Now that
you know Christ, you'll still make mistakes, but now you'll have a
chance to walk away from those mistakes and not do them. These do's
and don'ts you're talking about weren't written to take away all
your fun, nor were they made to continually show you how bad you
are when you fail.

“
You live on a farm,” John
continued. “You work with machines. Each machine has an operating
manual. In that manual, it instructs you to change the oil every so
many miles, grease the parts after so many hours, etc., etc., etc.
Why does the manual say these things? It doesn't give the
directions to waste the farmer's time and burden him with
meaningless tasks. Simply, the machine works much better if you
follow the manual that shows how the machine should
operate.

“
In a way, the Bible is God's
operating manual for man. God states how man should live not to
cramp his style, but so that man might live to the fullest. Man has
free will and can do whatever he or she wants. Unfortunately, bad
decisions can kill you inside and out. Just as the motor will seize
up if not greased and oiled, a person will seize up inside if they
ignore God and go their own way.”

“
But this manual is so big and so
complicated,” Erik said. “I've tried reading the Bible before and
there's some weird stuff in it. People killing people and having
affairs and all sorts of stuff that just doesn't make
sense.”

“
You've read the Bible before. You
read it as a book. Now read it as your guide,” John encouraged.
“Start with the words of Jesus in Matthew, Mark, Luke and John. The
Bible is God's word and the words of Jesus and his disciples. Read
those words and see how simple Christ's message really is. Don't
dwell on any one verse, but read the Gospel and see how God's plan
is to save and protect his children.

At the same time, don't quit asking questions of
people you can trust. You'll need to rely on His word and His
servants. See, there is a true living God, but there is also a true
enemy who would like to fill your mind with doubts and lead you
away from the faith if he could. So find the Bible and people who
know Christ when you get confused.”

“
But, there is one thought I can't
seem to get past,” Erik steeled himself to ask his most painful
question. “How can the God that created the universe, who made the
stars and the oceans, care enough to come to me? I'm a nobody. My
parents didn't even want me. Why would Jesus? I haven't done
anything to earn His love.”

John's answer was firm. “First, I'm not sure about
your parents, but I do know about Jesus. Jesus does love you. It
shows how much he loves you by calling to you even if you don't
deserve it. It says in the Bible that He called you by name. He
doesn't just love all mankind. He loves you and who you are. His
love is not determined by what you've done, but by the depth of His
love for you. He created you and has one hope for you. He hopes
that you'll be His child. He wants to love and be with you and help
you as you turn to His arms. That is the greatness of our God and
the depth of His love for you.”

They both sat in silence. The sound of a crowded
restaurant continued around them; a waitress scolded the cook for
forgetting to put hash browns with the eggs, a lady's high pitch
laugh told everyone the joke was great, and John and Erik
listened.

John said, “What about your parents? It's none of my
business, but you said you couldn't measure up to your dad, and I
don't understand what you meant, that your parents didn't want
you.”