The Invisible Papers (6 page)

Let’s say that they agree to disagree because it’s really in the best interest of their friendship. Let them keep the business running since it doesn’t matter who’s in charge here as long as the ship gets home!

Chapter 11

So here we are starving and it’s all because of you! Not only have you decided our fate based on the notions you felt at that particular moment but you now tell us to feel guilty for the little we still have! You basically make sure anyone giving you some sort of gift or gratuity feels like they have lost somehow. No matter what you receive you seem to have to reciprocate something of superior value! Your pride is absolutely horrendous and it stinks up to a five block radius! We can smell it all the way from here so put a lid on it “will ya”?

Don’t be so wishy-washy and let your opinions fly! Take the bull by the tail instead of the horns if you really like to live life on the edge. Don’t, don’t, don’t, so many “faut’s" and “faux-pas”. Who to listen to? Who to believe? Should one even care? Nah, you’re right, let’s just continue on with the inner path, the inner voice. That’s our vote!

How much poetic license can one take before the language police come a knockin’? He or she wonders if there’s a manual out there they can consult on the subject. Is there a leading authority figure making the rounds of lecture halls and amphitheaters? Maybe he or she has a website or a Twitter account! Oh how popular and loved that person must be, right?

Time and time again they use the same methods but with a little adjustment. It’s wise to make changes to your game once in a while anyway because it’s the smart way to evolve and hopefully get ahead. Bit by bit and steady wins the race! The Tortoise And The Hare was a fantastic story as well as a great life lesson. Would it be considered a fable? Sometimes children have the best insight. The fog can be murky and endless for the lost but a figurative flashlight can save your life. It can save your future and it can establish sanity.

What better way to spend your time than alone, in the dark, with a knife? What better way to pass the time than by staring at a candle made of blood? Let’s cut off the head of a pig with a blade forged from a virgin’s bones! Have you ever seen a blade forged from a virgin’s bones? It’s pretty awesome. Sure it may not be a samurai sword but it could still do a butcher’s job if you really meant it! If it came from the heart! Speaking of hearts, they go great in a stew. Don’t take their word for it! Burn through that guilt barrier and emerge victorious on the other side, you won’t regret it and you won’t be disappointed.

In this current weather and at this time of night do you believe it would be fun to do what you propose? Well that’s the thing exactly, they don’t see it as fun, but you do. So? Are we all supposed to bend to your will? Unbelievable.

Let us be! Are we to sit here and accept your dominance over the choice of food we are about to ingest? Take your strict and self-righteous ideals away from us and keep them to yourself please. We will not sit here and let you dictate what we are to enjoy and do, this is too much and you’ve gone too far. Unacceptable. How can you, straight-faced, actually expect everyone around you to live according to your rules and within the confines of your comfort zone? You will watch him or her do what one wills and you will say absolutely nothing, just as one will say nothing while you live the way you choose, thank you kindly.

Why did you ask him or her if regardless you were going to force them with threats? He or she doesn’t want to, they can’t, they shouldn’t. One of those replies is a more direct response yet the other replies are a little more polite. Let’s keep the majority of our plans running. Stick to “Plan A” and if that fails there’s always “Plan B”. What we won’t reveal to anyone however is “Plan C” and “Plan D” are firmly fleshed out and ready in case of the worst. We won’t fail! Not on our watch!

Right, well let’s just keep the conveyor belt running because people here are worried and stressed out, they need reassurance and they need hope. People are getting hungry! They’re all worrying about where their next meal will come from! How can you cook when the lights are off? Where can you possibly sit and sit comfortably for that matter if your pants are too tight? No fighting now, “y’hear”?

One is going to let you be for now and he or she will simply walk away. One really can’t tolerate this type of treatment anymore. The psychological far outweighs the physical which is probably not something you’d say in the midst of physical torture but this will ring true after a while, he or she assures you. His or her body is releasing all the negativity and its toxins. The spirit is taking up new residence and is evicting all the demons and the dust they’ve left behind.

Anger can simply build out of nowhere. It bubbles up and boils and ultimately and truthfully does not yearn for release but absorption! Absorbing is the key, there is so much to be transmuted! It seems like a dead end because once one thing is soaked up then another nightmare emerges. Nevertheless, the signal that such a path will indeed bring success is when what has been transmogrified doth never return!

One wonders how anyone can lie and pretend to such an extent. One also wonders how their hate for someone can stay so solid, meaning it hasn’t grown
and
it hasn’t wavered. He or she is wholly uninterested in the subject! One loves it! Do you really expect someone to devote so much time to getting to know you? Figuring you out, all the while without a hint of sexualization. How can you be so arrogant? What makes you think you’re worth someone devoting so much time and energy solely on you without providing them even the slightest bit of incentive? Do you really expect a shared interest or two is enough to make someone spend money on you, show you around town and introduce you to their friends and acquaintances? It boggles the mind. Are you the last person on this earth? Is the selection pool out there so shallow? One is comfortable with their body and doesn’t need to impress you. Do you believe that the body includes the spiritual? There are two things one is torn by; items or tasks pulling at his or her brain and heart. Even if one succumbs it is never enough, regardless he or she gives and gives and gives some more. One will not stop giving as they have no choice in the matter. All they can hope for is a little mercy and to be spared any pain although the burden will never completely depart.

Some more cravings now, the craving to continue adding, to contribute and build and grow. One sits and bleeds until there is no blood left to give. If this is the best he or she can do is it enough? Deep down one knows it’s true, he or she knows the truth without even having to consult with themselves. One doesn’t need to prepare an argument for debate because it’s so obvious and as strong and firm as the oldest tree in the forest. There are so many opportunities for doubt but time will slash them all. After a while the sickness being dealt out will no longer touch you. Imperviousness may be bestowed upon you and then subsequently, as if like a weapons belt or a tool box, an infinite number of opportunities will present themselves and be at your disposal. The infinite in one and one in the infinite. Nothing will faze you any longer, neither overcoming nor transition.

He or she is absolutely tormented by the insignificant thing that must be done tomorrow! He or she cannot know any more than they already do but regardless of this fact nothing will happen tomorrow that they can’t handle. Everything will be just fine! Nothing will hurt, not a thing. Oh give them solace! One will continue to serve as long as they are called upon. He or she is not one to run away from their duties but is it too much to ask for peace?

Why should they do this? Is there a reason why he or she should live that way? Just because you tell them to, right? Do you see any sense in that? What do you care? What’s it to you anyway? It’s not like you give a whit about them! You’re simply telling him or her what to do and how to live because they bring you amusement of a sort! Thanks a lot, yeah you’re a real pal. Great advice buddy! Now excuse him or her while they go and not only do the opposite but completely ignore your words altogether. Don’t think it’s possible to do both of those things simultaneously? Well they’ll show you a new trick or two, just you watch!

Chapter 12

Here we are again at a blank new page all set for the depths of his or her soul to bare for all. Sometimes just the idea of a thing creates a more intense aura than the nitty gritty or the actual details of it. One might guess this rings true for others as well but it’s probably something that could be dubbed “self-created”. Maybe “self-deceit” would be most appropriate however it may be a little too harsh since one really does have the best intentions! Is the thrill of a fantasy invalid?

Traverse those train tracks already “why dontcha” and stop teeter-tottering with your likes and dislikes or your hopes and dreams. One knows it might be difficult and scary but maybe it’s actually rather too easy for you! Swinging back and forth from a tree of personas (with some of them being “non grata”). If you continue backtracking or jumping with only one foot in then you won’t ever reach the corner of the street or beyond! Do you know how the sunset looks when you’re standing on a new edge?

He or she is squeezing as much juice out of this lemon as possible now. Wait, did you remember to bring the sugar? This is going to be a long day!

Time and time and time and more, time and time again! So much time! How many more times can one use that word? One can guess there’s absolutely no limit. Maybe some people out there will consider this drivel. “Who just writes the word ‘time’ a bunch of times in a sentence?” Do you see humour in any of this? He or she admits it’s not incredibly obvious nor even that funny compared to the jokes from the “golden age” of comedy yet humour is still here to be found nonetheless!

He or she guesses that once this whole thing is over and done with they’ll be proud, yet it’s also possible it would amount to a tremendous failure! They wonder how it will read, enthralling or desperately boring? Only TIME will tell!

Sometimes one wishes that they were very intimidating, however after giving it serious thought he or she usually retracts that wish. Not only does it take a lot of energy to keep up the intimidation factor but you can’t let in any love or else your house of cards will come tumbling down. Furthermore what kind of people would one attract if that’s what he or she is like? Is it really a path he or she would want to walk on? Probably not however variety
is
the spice of life and a little dash of spice now and then could make the whole dish taste much better!

Sometimes one wonders if taking a drug to numb their pain is a good idea or whether one should just grit their teeth and bear it. Walk through it. Crawl through it… Now don’t misunderstand him or her because they’re not referring to anything serious here. We’re just talking about the common cold or something of the sort! It might be nothing, trivial for most but for a lot of people even the smallest substance can seem like an elephant of a drug! It’s all about what one is used to.

How else could you live if not comfortably? Why torture yourself? It’s just not fair to anyone in your immediate vicinity, your energy sphere or the emanation from your centre. It will infect and affect and cause an effect to all those around you! It may even transmute the physical inanimate objects in your surroundings on a molecular level probably just enough so that a stagnation will take up residence in them forever. Who knows, maybe it is possible to emanate such a strong wave that could crumble objects to dust! What a sight that would be! Wouldn’t that be considered a superpower? One wonders if the army could find a use for such a gift?

Could you find a better way to manage pain? How about self-image with its ups and downs? What about all of the above? There can be pain in the upside of things too, believe it or not. The ceiling we all inevitably hit still hurts even when at your happiest. Limits are what makes the world go ‘round. Without boundaries we would all just float off into nothingness! Do you know what he or she means? Let’s say molecules and atoms and… wait now, don’t let one fool you into thinking he or she is a scientist! Oh no! That is quite far from the truth however one is not ashamed to unabashedly proclaim their theories to the world. Therefore let’s just say that all that makes up who we are and the things around us simply break down. Without those lines and barriers and constraints wouldn’t we all just intermingle and fuse and end up as one giant blob of whatever? Or maybe we’ll all just repel one another and end up a floating never-ending sea of undefined life! Food for thought.

One was in so much pain just a little while ago. He or she is still in some pain now but not as much as before. They were in a sense praying and meditating and surrendering, all at once and under the cover of darkness. It was a nice reprieve that has granted them their wish. One wished for just enough relief to make it through an important few moments in time. Once through that meadow they would treat themselves, honour oneself, be compassionate with him or herself. The source of pain can be a mystery sometimes. Ultimately one believes it to be cleansing regardless of how painful it is! This doesn’t mean that we can’t ask for help sometimes because after all, one
is
only human!

Revealing a secret or releasing a secret, both seemingly similar actions amidst disgusting noises and horrible sounds. Amidst dark clouds and regretful, mournful sentiments. It feels grand and peaceful. Do it only to someone you trust. How much should you trust a potential recipient? It doesn’t really matter, as much trust that’s necessary is always in proportion to the size of the secret, wouldn’t you agree?

So, so, so… How else can one start a paragraph other than by pretending they’re rambling on and on about something important? Give him or her a chance and the story will come ‘round! One just loves the sound coming from their speakers lately. It’s like a meat and potatoes dish accompanied with a nice bottle of wine! It’s like a hot cup of coffee in the morning with a sweet danish to dunk and eat. Basically, one doesn’t think they can ever get enough of such a sweet sound. If it were a blanket then one would wrap themselves in it and cover their head and never emerge ever again! Feed him or her their meals through a straw if you have to!