The I Hate to Cook Book (8 page)
3–4 servings
(This couldn’t be better or simpler, except that you must be around to service it every two hours for six hours. Don’t be afraid those already-cooked beans will cook to a pulp. For some mysterious reason, they don’t.)
2 average-sized (1-pound) cans kidney beans (do not drain)
3 big raw tomatoes (or an equal quantity of drained canned tomatoes; raw are better)
2 raw onions, sliced
½ pound bacon, the leaner the better
In a casserole dish, alternate layers of the beans, the thick-sliced tomatoes, and the onions till you run out. Bake at 300˚ for two hours, uncovered.
Now cut the bacon in half (the short strips work better) and lay half of them on top. Put the casserole back in the oven, uncovered, for another two hours, by which time the bacon should be brown. Punch it down into the beans, and put the rest of your bacon strips on top. Bake it uncovered for another two hours, and you’re done.
Or you can make
BURGUNDY BEANS 
3–4 servings
3 green onions, chopped
½ green pepper, chopped
½ pound ground beef
2 tomatoes, chopped
1 cup red wine
2 1-pound cans kidney beans
Just fry the onions and green pepper in a little oil until they’re tender, then add the crumbled ground beef and brown it. Next, add the chopped tomatoes and the wine, and simmer it all for five minutes. Add the beans, pour it all into a casserole, and bake, uncovered, for thirty minutes in a 350˚ oven.
Then there is always
CHEESE
.
Now cheese is something of a yes-and-no proposition. It isn’t too trustworthy, because you have to concentrate on it; and when you
hate to cook, you don’t want to. After you’ve produced a curdled Welsh Rabbit or a Welsh Rabbit that resembles a sullen puddle of rubber cement, the tendency is to leave cheese severely alone.
However, cheese has the virtue of keeping nicely, so long as you haven’t unwrapped it (or so long as it’s grated and in a covered jar in your refrigerator; see Leftover chapter). And when there’s a good half-pound or so of cheese in your refrigerator, you always have a comfortable awareness that there’s at least one supper on ice. (What that supper will probably be is soup and Grilled Cheese Sandwiches, and there’s nothing the matter with that, either, particularly if you spread the bread with butter and a little dry mustard mixed with vinegar.)
Then there are these two recipes. Neither can make a monkey out of you, and they are both very good.
CHEESE AND WINE BAKE
4 servings
butter, garlic clove
6 to 8 slices stale or lightly toasted bread
3 eggs
1 cup dry white wine
½ cup chicken broth
1 teaspoon salt
1 teaspoon Worcestershire sauce
½ teaspoon mustard
½ teaspoon paprika
½ teaspoon pepper
½ pound grated Swiss cheese (2 cups)
Ready? Mince the garlic clove and cream it into enough butter to spread the bread with. Then spread it, and put the slices butter side down in a big shallow cake pan or casserole dish.
Beat up the eggs, and to them add the wine, the broth, all the seasonings, and the cheese. Pour this over the bread, and bake,
uncovered
, at 325˚ for thirty minutes.
(This is a handy dish, incidentally, if you’re going out somewhere, to a cocktail party, for instance, before dinner. Before you go, you can do everything up to pouring the mixture over the bread.)
CHEESE-RICE PUDDING
4 servings
(A cross between a pudding and a soufflé. If you like, you can serve it with mushroom sauce—some of the canned varieties aren’t bad—or creamed tuna, or you can top it with a few bacon strips.)
1 cup uncooked rice
4 eggs
2 cups milk
2 tablespoons melted butter
¼ pound grated sharp cheese (1 cup)
1 teaspoon salt
Cook the rice without salt. Then separate the eggs. Beat the yolks slightly, add the milk, butter, cheese, salt, and cooked rice. Beat those egg whites now till they’re very stiff. Fold them into the egg yolk–milk business. Pour it into a greased baking dish and bake at 350˚, uncovered, for twenty-five minutes.
Finally, let us—all of us ladies who hate to cook—give a thought to
SOUP
.
A hearty soup, that is. A satisfying soup. A soup that—with crackers, carrot strips, and a dessert made by somebody else—will fill up the family. Here are three good ones.
HEIDELBERG SOUP
3–4 servings
2 cans potato soup, diluted with milk according to directions on can
5 slices bacon, chopped
4 slices salami, slivered
12 green onions, chopped, including some of the green
parsley
black pepper
Warm the soup in the top part of a double boiler. Meanwhile, fry the chopped bacon, drain it, and pour off all but one tablespoon of fat. In it, fry the salami and the onions. Add them, plus the bacon you just cooked, to the soup. Parsley and pepper it up, and serve.
BISQUE QUICK