The Hidden (The Hidden Trilogy) (31 page)

“Oh. I guess that makes sense…” My eyes wandered back to the spot on his arm where his wound should be. “How’d you do that? There’s not even a scar.”

“Rapid cellular regeneration,” he said. “It’s quite useful.”

I glanced at the bloody towel on top of the hamper, shuddering before looking away. “Did it hurt? Do you feel pain like humans can?”

He looked thoughtful. “I can’t really say. I’ve never been human, so I’m not sure how pain feels to them. But yes, it did hurt, although just for a second or two–another benefit of being able to heal so quickly. Plus, you never have to worry about broken bones, diseases, illness, growing old–”

“You don’t age?” My head snapped up. I’d all but forgotten he looked exactly the same today as he did thirteen years ago.

“No,” he said. “Not after we mature into our immortality.”

“And how do you do…
that
?”

“Well, we’re not born” –he gestured to himself– “like
this
. From birth up until we reach physical maturity, we’re as close to human as we’ll ever get–we age, we have normal senses, normal healing rate…but no illness. And we only use twenty-four of our twenty-eight chromosomes. The remaining four are dormant. When we get close to maturing, they become active and trigger the process, which can happen anywhere from fifteen years of age to twenty-five.”

“What happens then?”

“Your muscles become denser, and it leaves your entire body sore, like you got hit by a bus. You go through a second growth spurt to reach your final height. Your hearing goes in and out, and you get earaches. You get headaches, too. Feels like your head is about to explode, and your vision is spotty. Sometimes the headaches are so bad you throw up.”

“That sounds
awful
.”

“The last twenty-four hours are even worse. Fever sets in. Feels like your whole body is on fire. You’re a sweating, hallucinating mess for about twelve hours, until you fall into a comatose state for the remainder of the day. When you wake up, you’re…different.”

“How long does the whole process take?”

“It varies. Mine took a week from start to finish.”

When did he go through it? It couldn’t have been that long ago…right? “You’re not really twenty,” I said. Hell, he
couldn’t
be if he looked the same as he did all those years ago.

His eyes dropped. “No. I was twenty-two when I matured, so that’s when I stopped aging.”

My heart sank. “You’re not going to age another day,” I mumbled to myself. “You’ll never grow old.” He was done. I hadn’t even
started
and he was already done.

When he didn’t say anything, I took his silence as confirmation. “You’re immortal.” He’d said so himself, but the gravity of it was just now sinking in.

It looked like he was trying to choose his words carefully. “Our cells don’t die. They can be traumatized, but they regenerate so fast it’s like our bodies are in a constant state of equilibrium. So for all intents and purposes, yes, we are immortal.”

My heart pounded as my head spun. I felt like I might throw up.

I wanted to be with Thomas forever, but as it turned out, 
his
forever and
my
forever were different versions. Incompatible versions, he’d said himself. I would continue to age, grow old, and eventually die, while Thomas would remain forever young and unchanging. Any way I tried to see it, Thomas and I could never have a normal life together.

I pushed the thought from my head and swallowed the dry ache in my throat, refusing to blink. I didn’t want the tears brimming my eyes to spill. I took in a deep breath to calm my voice. “It’s getting late, I should probably go. Beth will be home soon, and I don’t think I could explain
this
,” I mumbled, gesturing to my bloody clothes.

“Are we still doing something tonight?” His eyes looked sad, like he already knew the answer.

I picked at the dried blood under my nails. “I don’t think so. It’s just…this is a lot to handle. I need to think things over.”

He didn’t say anything. He just nodded and handed me Buttons.

Chapter Fifty

Sunday, November 1
st

Thomas hadn’t called or stopped by. Then again, I’d asked him not to. I’d had the whole weekend to think about things, but I was no closer to a solution. If anything, my thoughts just became more screwed up until I couldn’t tell where one began and the other ended.

My phone chimed on my nightstand. I grabbed it and saw a text from Gabriel:

You free? I’m downstairs.

I pushed my laptop aside and dragged myself out of bed, throwing on some slippers. I didn’t even bother to change out of my sweats before I went down.

Gabriel was in the empty lobby, sitting on the brown leather couch. He smiled as I approached, patting the spot next to him. I plopped down, facing him as I leaned against the armrest. He lifted my legs and draped them over his lap.

He smirked as he toyed with a hole in my sweatpants. “Glad to see you dressed up for me.”

I couldn’t help but smile. “Sorry. I didn’t feel like changing.”

He frowned. “I’m gonna go out on a limb and say something’s bothering you.”

I shrugged. “I’m fine.”

“You’re a terrible liar, Emily. What’s wrong?”

I bit the inside of my cheek, debating whether or not to tell him. Eh, what the hell. It might be nice to have a sounding board. “Thomas and I are having…problems.” Actually, it was
one
very big problem, but I couldn’t get into all that with Gabriel.

“You should just break up with him.”

I shot Gabriel a dirty look. “Don’t be an asshole.”

He laughed. “I’m sorry. I just love to see your face make that expression, the one where you get all indignant. It’s cute.”

My jaw clenched as I glared at him.

He smiled. “That’s the one.”

I rolled my eyes, standing up to leave. If he was going to be a dick, I wasn’t going to stick around for it.

He grabbed my arm and gently pulled me back down. “That was the last one, I swear.” He held up his right hand to vouch for his honesty. “Now tell me what happened.”

I leaned back against the armrest again, drawing my legs up to my chest. “Thomas is…not who I thought he was.” I sighed. “I don’t know, maybe we’re just too different.”

“You know what they say… ‘Enjoy it while it lasts, because it never does.’ ”

I frowned. “That’s awfully pessimistic,” I mumbled, although he was probably right.

“It’s not pessimistic, it’s realistic. There’s a difference.” There was a subtle edge to his voice that wasn’t there a moment ago. Most people might not have caught it, but I did.

As I sat there and stared at him, wondering why he seemed defensive all of a sudden and why he always had such a sour attitude about love and relationships, it dawned on me. Gabriel had been hurt before.

I momentarily forgot his general douchetastic demeanor and softened towards him a little. “What was her name?”

His eyes flickered. “Whose name?”

“The girl that broke your heart.”

He frowned. “I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

I nodded. “Uh-huh.
Sure
.”

“I
don’t
.” He had a fierce look that told me not to push it.

But I wouldn’t be my lovely self if I could let things go, now would I? “Then why are you so bitter?” I retorted.

As soon as the words left my mouth, I knew they shouldn’t have. And I felt awful for it.

Surprisingly, Gabriel wasn’t upset. “I’m not bitter,” he said. “Jaded, maybe, but not bitter.”

“And apparently in denial, as well. It’s okay that you got your heart broken, Gabriel. It only makes you human.”

He sighed. “We’re not talking about
my
feelings, we’re talking about
yours
.”

“
No
, we’re not. All you and your defeatist attitude said was that it wasn’t going to work, so I might as well give up.”

He rolled his eyes. “I never said you should
give up
.”

“You sure as hell implied it.”

“Whatever. Quit bitching and
do
something about it. Try to work it out.”

I sighed, sinking further into the couch. “I don’t see how we can.”

He closed his eyes as he pinched the bridge of his nose. “Do you love him?”

“Yeah, but–”

“Do you want to be with him?”

“Yeah, but–”

He lifted his head to look at me. “Then you have to
try
.”

I fingered the hole in my sweatpants, using it as a chance to look away. “What if it’s not that easy?”

He lifted my feet and placed them on his lap again, his cool fingers massaging my ankles. When he finally spoke, there was a hint of sadness in his voice. “Nothing worthwhile is.”

Chapter Fifty-One

Monday, November 2
nd

“Where’s Emily?”

I sat down in our usual lunch spot under the tree, avoiding Mel and Matt’s questioning stares. “She knows,” I mumbled.

“Hold up.” Matt’s eyes widened as he sat up straighter. “Em
knows
, knows?”

I rested my arms on my knees, staring off into space. “Just about me, not her.”

To say that I’d been useless since Emily told me she “needed some time” was a giant fucking understatement. I’d spent the whole weekend in bed, cuddling her pillow because it still smelled like her. This morning, I’d barely been able to pull myself out of my funk and make it to our sociology class. The only reason I did was the off-chance Emily would be there too and maybe I’d get to at least see her, even if she wouldn’t talk to me.

But she didn’t show, and I had to spend the rest of class pretending I had something in my
both
my eyes. It was a pretty sorry sight.

Mel waved her hand in front of my face. “Thomas? Hello?”

I turned to look at her. I hadn’t even heard her speak.

She gnawed on her lip and placed her hand on my arm. “How’d it happen?”

I shrugged. “My arm got cut pretty bad. She freaked out and wanted to take me to the hospital. Freaked out again when she saw I didn’t need to go.”

I left out the part about Buttons and meeting her before. I couldn’t really explain it, but I wanted to keep that part of our relationship private. It was…sacred.

Matt winced. “That sucks, man.”

I ran my fingers through my hair. “She won’t talk to me, she won’t even return my texts... I have to tell her, right? I mean, I have to make her understand–”

“
No
,” Mel said, shaking her head. “Not right now. She’ll never believe you. Wait until she moves past this and then break it to her.”

What if she
doesn’t
move past this?

I stared out at the courtyard in front of us, envying everyone else’s happiness. Here I was, dying inside, and the universe didn’t seem to care.

This is bullshit.

Emily was the best thing that ever happened to me, and I’d be
damned
if I let her go without a fight. So if she didn’t want to see me right now, well, too fucking bad. Because I was bringing the fight to her.

My fist pounded on the front door of Em’s dorm. I heard Beth curse inside as her feet padded on the carpet, coming closer. The door cracked open, showing a sliver of Beth’s face. 

“Thomas, hey–”

“Where is she?”

“She’s not here.”

“Bullshit.” I pushed the door open, brushing past Beth. I ignored her hollering and went straight for Emily’s room, not bothering to knock as I burst through her door.

My steps faltered when I saw her empty room.

“Told you.”

I turned at Beth’s voice. Leaning against the doorframe, her eyes wandered around Emily’s room. “She left this morning. Said she needed to go someplace quiet and think things over.”

Pushing my hair back, I sighed. This couldn’t be good. “Fuck.”

“I don’t know what happened between you two, but you need to fix it. I’ve never seen Em like this–all sad and puffy and crusty. I don’t like it, and it doesn’t suit her. So fix it, okay?”

I scowled at Beth and sat on the edge of Emily’s bed. “How can I fix it when she won’t even talk to me?”

Her face hardened as her eyes narrowed on me infinitesimally. “Did you cheat on her?”

“No.
God
, no.” Every other girl paled in comparison to Emily, but I knew how our blow up must look from the outside.

Beth seemed appeased by my answer, her face and stance slowly relaxing. “Good. I didn’t want to have to kick your ass.”

My mouth lifted in a smile, despite my sour attitude. 

She grinned and pushed herself off the doorframe. “Give her a couple days to cool off and try again, Romeo.” She bit her lip as her humor faded. “She loves you. She’s not gonna throw that away because of some stupid fight.”

Reluctantly, I pushed myself up from Emily’s bed. I just wanted to crawl under her covers and wait for her to come back, but instead I left, hoping Beth was right.

Chapter Fifty-Two

Friday, November 6
th

“I’m going swimming, you wanna come?” Beth asked.

Putting my book down, I grabbed my phone to check the time. It was 11:15 PM. I frowned and turned around to face her. “It’s past eleven. I thought the pool closed at nine?”

She grinned and tossed her towel over her shoulder. “It does.”

“Then…how are we gonna go swimming?”

“You’re forgetting my boyfriend is one of the lifeguards, Em.”

Oh. “Josh is gonna sneak us in?” Him and Beth
finally
managed to work things out last week. And when I say “work things out,” I mean he saw her sucking face with some guy at a frat party and hulked out on the poor guy in a jealous, drunken rage. Beth described the whole thing as “romantic.”
I’d
describe it as fucking psychotic, but I digress...

While I was happy that Josh finally came to his senses, it was a little hard to be around him and Beth now that they were in the over-the-top, ridiculously sappy honeymoon phase. Especially since my relationship appeared to be crashing and burning around me.