The Hidden Life (2 page)

against our

tired feet.”

-Christopher Poindexter

Seth

“
CONGRATULATIONS, SETH, THAT
was an excellent speech!” my grandfather Ralph exclaimed as he approached where I stood near the grill, patting me on the back. “Your grandma and I couldn’t be any prouder of you! Class president, salutatorian, and a full-ride to Northwestern to boot, the next thing we know, you’ll be President of the United States.”

Chuckling, I shook my head while flipping the last of the burgers for the late-arriving guests to Colin’s and my joint graduation party, and then set the spatula down as I turned to face him. “Well, I appreciate the vote of confidence, Grandpa, but I have no interest in a life of politics. After four years on the debate team, I’ve had my fill of arguing public policy and trying to convince people of my ideas. I think I’ll stick to the behind-the-scenes arena and do all the research for those who like to be raked over the coals on a daily basis. Seems like a lot less indigestion and gray hair that way.”

His smile widened as he ruffled the brown mop on top of my head like I was eight instead of eighteen. “You know I support whatever you want to do, but what do you know about indigestion and gray hair, boy? You’re just entering the prime of your life, for God’s sake. You should be worried about chasing tail and how many beers you can funnel before passing out. Just make sure you wear a condom and don’t let anybody take pictures of you while acting like a fool, and you can concern yourself with that other crap after you finish college. Now’s the time to go find out who you are, what tickles your fancy.”

As if on cue, Colin strolled up right at that moment, carrying the bottle of water I’d asked him to get nearly ten minutes before. His gray T-shirt clung to his broad chest, showing off his well-defined pecs and abs more so than usual, thanks to the hot, humid, and sunny June afternoon, and his khaki cargo shorts hung just perfectly off of his hips.

If I stared long enough, I would’ve been able to see the outline of his thick shaft behind the zipper area, shading just to the left like it always did, but I didn’t stare at it. At least, not right then with my grandfather there. Something told me that announcing that Colin was
what I fancied
probably wouldn’t have been included in that whole “I support whatever you want to do” part of what Gramps had just said.

It didn’t matter though; I’d stolen enough glimpses at his crotch throughout the day for the image to pop into my head and make my own cock stir.
Jesus, I’ve got to stop perving on my best friend. Especially around our families.

“Took ya long enough, dude,” I scoffed as I reached for the water, pushing back the confusing, corrupted thoughts that had seemed to creep in my head more and more frequently. “Good thing I’m not dying of dehydration over here or anything while I cook for all of your bottomless-pit teammates.”

Rolling his eyes and ignoring my quip, Colin shifted his attention to my grandfather like the well-mannered guy he always was. “Thanks again for coming out to celebrate with us today, sir. Your and Mrs. Andrews’ support has always meant the world to me, like I know it does to Seth too. I’m gonna miss seeing you guys in the bleachers at my games.”

“We’ll still be here cheering for you, bud.” Grandpa smiled and reached up to lightly slap him on the shoulder, much like he’d just done to me, though with Colin’s six-and-a-half-foot frame, it took a little more stretching on the older man’s part. “And if I can convince Rose of it, we may just fly out to see one of your games at the Big Stadium.”

“The Big
House
, Grandpa, not the Big Stadium,” I corrected him, while transferring the patties from the grill to a serving platter. Glancing over at him, I threw a wicked smirk in his direction. “And if you and Grams are heading out to Michigan, I assume you’ll need a chaperone to help you guys get around. I wouldn’t want you to get lost trying to find a stadium that doesn’t exist or anything.”

“See there?” Grandpa nodded his head toward me, but kept his eyes on Colin. “He’s always politicking, even when he claims he’s not. Scheming and finagling his way to get what he wants. What’s he gonna do without you around to keep him in line, Cassidy?”

A deep belly laugh rumbled out of my best friend as his green eyes twinkled with mischief. “Sir, I’ve been trying to keep him in line for eleven years now, and I still haven’t figured it out, but I’m pretty sure Seth’s smart enough to keep himself out of any real trouble, with or without me around. I’m willing to bet—”

“Colin, there you are! I’ve been looking everywhere for you.” My sixteen-year-old sister Effie suddenly appeared and inserted herself in the middle of our makeshift circle, cutting Colin off before he could finish his thought.

All of our gazes swung to her as she bounced excitedly from foot to foot in her low-cut tank top and cut-off denim shorts, an outfit chosen for the benefit of only one person. The one she’d been infatuated with all her life — Colin.

Sadly, she thought her major obstacle was to get him to see her as something other than the younger sister he never had, but little did she know, she never had a chance. Unless she was willing to get a sex change.

Plus, even if he wasn’t aware yet, he already belonged to me. Well, I hoped he did… or he would once he realized what I had figured out months before. But with our high school graduation ceremony that morning and the two-month summer break already upon us, it became clear I was running out of time before we both left for college and I possibly missed my chance to show him what we could be together. I needed to act. Give him the push he needed.

“Earth to Seth, are you even listening to me?” Effie waved her hands in front of my face, pulling me back to reality from my wandering thoughts.

“W-what did you say?” I blinked hard to clear the haze in my vision.

Huffing an exasperated sigh, she propped her hands up on her hips with all the sass of a teenaged diva. “I asked if you wanted to join the horseshoes tournament that Dad and Uncle Joe are organizing. You’ll need to find a partner though, ‘cause Colin just agreed to be mine.” She looked up over her shoulder at him and batted her eyelashes for a few seconds then snapped her victorious smirk back over to me. “Good luck.”

I lifted my gaze to Colin, who could only shrug and give me the what-was-I-supposed-to-say-to-her look. Chuckling, I shook my head and crossed my arms over my chest, knowing with Effie as his teammate there was a very small chance they would win. My sister had the worst hand-eye coordination I'd ever witnessed, and Colin was the most competitive person I’d ever met. The two of them on the same team would surely make for some worthy afternoon entertainment.

“Pssh… who needs luck when you’ve got skill? Ain’t that right, Grandpa?” I looked over at my grandfather and lifted my eyebrows in a silent invitation to be my partner, hoping he understood.

Thankfully, the old man didn’t let me down.

“Skills
and
experience,” he boasted, as he matched my bowed-up stance in an action of solidarity. We Andrews men had to stick together. “You two are going down.”

Subsequent shit-talking ensued for a couple of minutes until Colin and Effie were called away to play their first match at the same time Grams asked Grandpa to help her do something, finally giving me a chance to relax. Ever since I’d started thinking about Colin in a not-just-my-best-friend-because-now-I-want-to-fuck-his-brains-out way, I would tense up when I was around him. And it sucked. I missed just thinking about him as the guy who I’d grown up playing in the dirt with, or riding bikes with, or sleeping in a tent in our backyards when we had a sleepover with. But for the life of me, every time I looked at him now, all I could think about was his cock. Touching it. Stroking it. Sucking it. Feeling him inside me.

I was losing my fucking mind. Having a super-duper fucking quarter-life crisis at eighteen. It was the only explanation.

Squeezing my eyes shut, I shook my head back and forth really fast for a couple of seconds, hoping the jerky motion would shake some sense back into me. But when I opened my lids and Colin’s large frame came into focus from across the yard as he waved me over to where he and Effie had meandered to, I knew I couldn’t let it go. I had to know if he felt the same. And I planned to confront him as soon as I could get him alone.

HOURS LATER, AS
the warm New England sun rapidly sunk into the horizon, Colin and I said goodbye to most of the partygoers, thanking them for coming and all the well wishes. Our parents had disappeared inside my house for some coffee and to talk about whatever adults talked about when they hung out, leaving the two of us alone. Luckily, one of Effie’s friends had invited her to go to the movies and for a sleepover, and though it was obvious she didn’t want to leave Colin’s side, when he encouraged her to go, she did just as he said.

“You wanna head down to the creek? I heard Jason was having a bonfire get-together tonight with everyone,” I proposed, as I glanced around the yard, surprised how much of the food and décor my mom had already cleaned up. I was really going to miss having her around to do my laundry and make my bed.

Colin shook his head, a sly smirk slowly spreading across his face. “Nah, we got the next couple of months to hang out with those knuckleheads. Since this is our day for celebrating, I got something for us that I think will be fun.”

“You did?” I cocked my head to the side, curious to what he’d done.

“I did.” The smirk morphed into a full-fledged grin as excitement twinkled in his eyes. “Wanna see?”

“Hells yes!” I exclaimed, taking off running toward the massive hundred-year-old oak in the far back left corner of my yard.

Colin caught and passed me quickly, thanks to his superb physical shape and legs that were a couple of inches longer than mine. Ever since I could remember, he’d been the tallest and the most athletic kid in our class, and not just in football. It was like he was born to play professional sports — football, basketball, baseball, hockey. He excelled at it all. Not that I was an uncoordinated klutz or anything. I could hold my own on the court or ice with most guys our age, neither the best nor the worst at any given time. But Colin wasn’t most guys our age. Which was yet another reason that made me want him more.

The guy was built like a Greek god. One of those models you’d see in a magazine and think they really don’t exist or had been Photoshopped to high heaven. Only I knew he did exist and it was all-natural. And it tempted me every damn day.

“Come on, molasses! My granny could outrun your slow ass!” Colin taunted over his shoulder as he began ascending the wooden planks nailed into the trunk of the tree that led up to our boyhood retreat.

“Screw you, showoff!” I shouted back, my jog slowing into a leisurely walk just to irritate him. “And your granny sure did seem to like my ass earlier!”

I reached the base of the tree and peered up to watch him take the final few steps up to the log-cabin-style tree house we had built with our dads one summer, doing a whole lot more than just
liking
his ass. My cock twitched with anticipation. I didn’t know what Colin had put together for us for the evening, but whatever it was, it was just going to be the two of us, and I’d finally have a chance to talk to him about things.

Or better yet, just show him.

Making quick work of the staircase, I joined Colin inside the one-room house, which suddenly seemed so much smaller than it had when I was a kid. I remembered thinking after we had built it that it was big enough to have a birthday party inside, but my Mom had quickly nixed that idea, claiming it was a disaster waiting to happen. Whatever. It would’ve been wicked cool.

“It’s been forever since we’ve been up here. Not quite how you remember it, eh?” he asked, watching me intently. Wistfully, even.

With a chuckle, I shook my head and glanced around the space, empty with the exception of an ice chest, a large cardboard box, and two lit kerosene lanterns that sat at Colin's feet. “Yeah, kinda crazy to think of all the crap we did up here. For a few summers, we may have spent more time in this house than in our actual ones. Hotwheels, long-ass games of Monopoly, drinking our first beer, ghost stories… we did it all.”
Except each other.

His bright smile returned as he crouched down and started opening the box. “I know we’re gonna be spending lots of time out at the creek and hanging out with our friends over the next couple of months, but I thought for our last summer here together, we could bring some of that back. The stuff you and me used to do. Ya know, for old time’s sake, before we go off and conquer the world and all.”