Read The Girl Who Raced Fairyland All the Way Home Online
Authors: Catherynne M. Valente
Tamburlaine exploded. She went up in blue-gold flames that turned quickly to angry, bloody red. The flames of her engulfed the clurichaun, boiling away his tattoos, his scarlet thread, even the
SPALDING
on his back sizzled away.
Blunderbuss roared in depthless marsupial grief and bounded to Hawthorn's side. But together, Tamburlaine and Goldmouth burned to the ground, and when it was over all that remained was a blackened slab of wood shaped like a girl.
And a blue boy, singed out of the sky, lying in a crumpled heap in the center of Runnymede Square.
“Saturday!” It was September's turn to cry out. A-Through-L folded back his wings and shot earthward. She tumbled off his back to Saturday's side. The Marid did not move. She touched his forehead, his cheeks, his lips, his shorn-off topknot, the tattoos on his arms so like hers. She whispered all the things a girl can whisper when she bargains with what has already happened:
Please wake up, please be all right, please don't go
.
She looked at her love and she understood him. She understood the workings of him like the workings of Fizzwilliam and Mrs. Frittershank and Aroostook. And her mind leapt over itself to fasten everything together. She whistled softly.
The troll's alphabet came dancing toward her from their hiding places, for when they'd left the House Without Warning, they'd known at once this was no place for nice words. All the copper and tin and wood and silver and glass and bone letterpress type-blocks rolled toward her like kittens who've heard their mother coming.
Madame Tanaquill simply could not believe that she was being ignored. It had never happened to her before, not really. She found she hated it.
“If you're going to make it this easy for me,” she scoffed, and strode toward September with a long, old-fashioned sword in her hand.
“Don't you go near her,” snarled Mallow. She put herself between the great former Fairy Queene and pointed a long, soup-beaten wooden spoon at her face. “If you take another step, I will take your breath from you and give it to the wind.”
Madame Tanaquill tried to dazzle the girl who didn't even know she'd chosen a boy's title with her eyes. It was one of her favorite tricks with humans. She flared her wide, ultraviolet wings and made her eyes into planets of joy and despair in which any human mind would wander, mad, forever.
“No,” Mallow said simply. It had always been her best magic. Her first magic. The No filled her up with its heat so completely that it left no room for anything else, let alone a Fairy's bedroom eyes. Tanaquill ignored her. She slapped Good Queen Mallow hard in the face, so hard her nails drew blood. “No,” Mallow said. Tanaquill drew a slender sword. But Mallow waved her Spoon, and it melted away like ice. “No.”
September stroked Saturday's scorched brow, the Saturday who did not remember her, even a little, whose memory had been cut away by terrible teeth. “I can fix it,” September said.
“How can you fix it?” Ell whispered. “Oh, I didn't meant to say you couldn't, it's only ⦠how?”
September knuckled away tears from her eyes. She looked up into the warm orange eyes of the first creature in Fairyland who ever loved her.
“I think it's because I called myself the Engineer. When they said I had to choose a title. I can see how things workâhow everything works. And I saw how Aroostook worked, the ballast down inside it. And I can see how Saturday works, all the places he's broken. And Ell ⦠I know what the Heart of Fairyland is.”
She coaxed the type-blocks up onto Saturday's skin, smoothing them all right side up with her careful hands. September drew the Greatvole's whisker and held it at its tip like a long, black, crystal pen.
“The Heart of Fairyland is a story,” she said, and she felt so warm and light and full of the rightness of it that she thought she might faint. “It's a story that gets told over and over, a million different ways, with a million different boys and girls and Marids and wombats and Wyveraries and trolls. It's a story that keeps all of us moving through the world like blood through a body. Like a race. Like a hunt. Like a Cantankerous Derby. We were always making the Heart. Under the sea and in the Land of Wom and in the Great Grand Library. And what do you need to make a story? What has Fairyland got where Aroostook has its ballast?” September smiled up at all. “You need a pen”âshe waved the whiskerâ“you need words and letters and capitals and lowercases.” The letter blocks shivered with the pleasure of being needed. “You need paper.” She touched Saturday's blue chest with her shaking, exhausted fingers. A large, bold letter
S
hopped up to cover the spot. “And you need ink.”
September pricked her tattooed arm with the point of the Greatvole's whisker. She cut deep, so there would be enoughâbut she needn't have worried. The cuttlefish's ink, black and green and blue and gold, flowed out of her arm, out of her wrist and her elbow and her shoulder and her bicep, out of every part of her that Sepia Siphuncle had painted. The ink flowed down over the crystal whisker and dripped over the letter blocks and onto Saturday's blue skin. But still, he did not wake.
“It's not working,” fretted Ell.
“Someone still has to tell the story, silly,” September said. She traced the whisker over and around the letters and whispered their story to Saturday.
“Once upon a time, there was a girl from very far away and a boy who lived every which way at once⦔
The tales lovers tell each other about how they met are hushed and secret things. They change year by year, for we all meet many times as we grow up and become different and new and exciting peopleâand this never stops, even for a minute, even when we are ninety. I have told you September's every little secret. I have never held back even once. But I will let her have this last one, for you have heard already how the girl from very far away found a boy in a cage, and what they did after.
When September finished her tale, she laid her head on Saturday's chest. The ink smeared and ran and turned her face quite blue. She couldn't breathe or move.
I'm right, I know I'm rightâaren't I?
She felt a cold, hard hand on her head. As cold and hard as stones in the sea.
“Hullo, September,” whispered Saturday. “I thought you'd never come back.”
September sucked in her breath so fast she choked. She held her Marid as tight as anything. “Saturday! Oh, Saturday! I missed you so!”
“HELLO!” bellowed the First Stone of Fairyland, late to Mummery, sitting against a marionette and watching everything with great interest.
“Who cares?” Madame Tanaquill snorted. “The rest of us are still here, you knowâthe ones who didn't wander around like morons with a seventh grader's badge on their coats.”
“No, they're not,” September whispered. “No one's here but us.” She kissed Saturday just as though it was her First Kiss. And he kissed her back like it was his last.
“We won,” the Marid said to her, touching her face all over now that he knew it so well again. “We won, so you'll stay.”
“Yes. Yes. I'm staying.”
But Tanaquill was right. The Winds still circled slowly in the sky along with Hushnow, the Ancient and Demented Raven Lord, and several other flying racers. A few still wandered about the fighting field, dazed. The fliers began to descend, seeing the clurichaun bonfire had burnt itself out.
Madame Tanaquill had not come all this way to be threatened with a spoon and a disgusting display of romance. She would not have it. She would not. She had been born to stand astride this worldâand though she had done it for a time as a signpost, she knew who she was and she knew her destiny, which none of the clowns around her constantly throwing pies about and calling them great deeds ever had. Not the way she knew. And Tanaquill knew very well that the final act can only end with a wedding or a mass slaughterâand the way those two mewling simpletons looked, she didn't like her odds. But the Fairy Prime Minister had no worries to spend on it. You could always change the ending. Spoil it, rip it to pieces. Fairies loved to do it. They'd built their first city just to do it bigger and grander. It was easy. All you needed was the wantâand a dart gun strapped to your thigh.
It all happened very, very fast.
Madame Tanaquill hurled her sword up and cut Hushnow, the Ancient and Demented Raven Lord, out of the sky before he could squawk any cryptic final word. She ducked beneath Mallow's Spoon and drew one of the Knapper's daggers from some poor sap's back and sent it flying into the chest of the Emperor of Everything, who toppled forward onto his face. He managed to squawk out a final word, but I shall not repeat it, or your parents would scold me. The Winds sped toward her in a rain of color. The Green Wind lead the squadron, the Leopard of Little Breezes roaring her own spotted war songs.
“September, are you all right?” Green called down. “Get down! Find cover!”
Tanaquill laughed. Her iron dress blistered her skin. Mallow swung her Spoon at herâand the Fairy Prime Minister shoved her away with a wave of diamonds that streamed from her hand like lace. Mallow landed on the far side of the square, half buried in jewels. Tanaquill bent down and yanked a lily-tangled crossbow out of Whipstitch, the Elegant Emperor's hand. It was going better than she had imagined it could. He tried to fight her, but Whipstitch had
If something is good, it is off-limits
written on the underside of his name tag, so for the moment, he could not touch anything he wanted to have at all. Madame Tanaquill spun round and fired the crossbowâand shot Ajax Oddson clean through. He crumpled to the ground in a heap of silks.
September gasped and leapt up. She could hear the gulping sound Ell made before his flame came bursting out. Blunderbuss lowered her head and got ready to charge the tart in the scrapheap dress, as she thought of Tanaquill. Saturday tried to get up, but coughed out smoke and staggered. The Green Wind landed and drew a green sword.
Tanaquill laughed roughly at him. “Oh, please. You're nothing but a bag of hot air.” She unstrapped her favorite bronze dart gun from her thigh, its vicious dart snug inside. She held it up to her perfect lips.
September ran toward the Green Wind. She didn't say a thing. She didn't say
No!
Or
I won't let you!
Or
Don't you dare!
Or even
Stop.
She didn't think about it. She didn't think about home or Saturday or Ell or how much it would hurt. She didn't think about never seeing her mother or father again, or never finishing school, or never being Queen or anything else. She simply stepped between her friend and his death.
Tanaquill's dart took September in the throat. The poison spread through her like a quick green shiver and she fell. The crown of Fairyland rolled off her head with a terrible clang, spinning across the stones, coming to rest against Blunderbuss's paw.
*Â Â Â *Â Â Â *
Only a moment later, sleigh drawn by a team of strangely colored hippopotami tore into Runnymede Square.
Susan Jane, Owen, and Aunt Margaret came just in time to see a crimson Wyvern throw back his head and sob fire into the empty sky.
Â
In Which Not All Is Lost
September woke to the smell of mushrooms all around. It was a warm, comforting smellâand leaves, too, Autumn leaves, and deep, dark dirt. She opened her eyes: All round her rose tall black distaffs wound around with fuzzy silk and wool and fleeces, all colored as Autumn woods are colored, red and gold and brown and pale white. They crowded close together, fat and full, like pines and firs.
The moon peeked shyly out of the clouds above. Only one moon. September lay in a little clearing. Many parchment-colored distaffs had left their fibers all over the forest floor like pine needles. In the corner of the clearing sat a lady. September brought her hand to her throat, searching for her wound, but found only smooth skin. She sat up in the crisp night and looked into the eyes of a lady sitting on a throne of mushrooms. Chanterelles and portobellos and oysters and wild crimson forest mushrooms piled up high around her, fanning out around her head. September knew that lady. But this time she was not herself made out of mushrooms, but simply a vast, impossibly tall woman dressed in simple blackâthe last member of Lye's tea party, who only comes too early or too late. Death.
“Good evening, my lady,” said September, as she had done long ago, when her death was small.
“Good evening, September,” said her death. “I am sorry I could not make it in time for tea. But you seem to have done well enough without me.”
“Not well enough. You know, I really thought I would win. I thought ⦠I thought I would have been a good Queen.”