THE GIFT (9 page)

“Well, in that case, I would love for you to go to Paris with me.
Paris est pour des amants, disent-ils
,”
she told him.

“Yes, I’ve heard that too and it would appear that we are lovers, so we must belong there,” he replies.
“
Est-ce un oui
?”

“Yes, that is a yes. It’s a definite yes!” she almost squealed.

Paris was magical. Jagger had replaced her original reservations at a fairly inexpensive hostel with reservations for a grand suite in an old hotel that looked like something out of the movies. Everything was so decadent and richly done, that she felt like she was in a fairy tale. They visited museums and fine restaurants by day, traveling through the Louvre and cuddling on benches in open French markets. They saw the
Arc de Triomphe
and the Eiffel Tower, taking funny pics of her squishing them between her fingers at a distance.

At night, they ate French pastries and drank wine, just chatting and enjoying one another’s company. She learned all about how Jagger had grown up in a wealthy family and had inherited everything when his parents passed away within a year of one another. His father had died suddenly of heart failure and his mother’s health just seemed to slowly deteriorate without explanation until she finally succumbed to death. Many claimed she died of a broken heart, but Jagger said the autopsy revealed she had been slowly poisoned and further investigation revealed she had done it to herself, not wanting to be here without her husband.

“How horrible for her and for you!” Amanda exclaimed.

“My parents married young. My father was all she had ever known as the center of her life. She loved us children and was a good mother, but my father was the most important thing in her life. She lived for him and when he was gone, she saw no reason to remain. My sister and I were grown and off doing our own thing by then,” he said.

“And your sister? Where is she now?” Amanda asked.

“Off in some third world country, no doubt. She is a physician with the Doctors Without Borders group. I never know where she is from one month to the next until I get a postcard. Usually by the time it makes it out of whatever remote location she is, she is already back home again. When she is home, she doesn’t live far from me and checks on me quite often. She has been a good sister, especially in recent years,” he said.

“Why in recent years?” Amanda asked, wondered if this something he kept dark about himself was the thing that made her wonder about what was happening between them.

“Nothing we want to discuss over crepes and wine,” he told her with a smile, taking another bite from his plate and smiling happily at her. Amanda didn’t push. He would tell her if he felt there was a need for her to know. In the meantime, she would do her best not to assume the worst. Still, her curiosity was peaked.

Back at the hotel, they climbed between the luxurious sheets, cuddling together as they kissed lazily beneath the covers on the large four poster bed of their suite. Amanda felt the familiar burn of skin that felt like it was on fire each time he touched her. Every touch was sensual, careful, designed to stimulate the heat already rising like a volcano to the surface of her body. His breath on her ear as he nibbled his way gently around her lobe and moved downward, placing soft kisses gingerly along her neck and shoulder was inviting her in to this little world that existed only between the two of them.

A low moan escaped her throat almost involuntarily as he pushed her forward, softly pinning her face sideways onto the bed and resuming his featherlike kisses down her spine. Shockwaves rushed through her system and seemed to echo through each digit and shoot back inward, resonating soundly between her legs. Her clit hardened as it pressed into the sheets and his mouth made its way down to the rounded slopes of her backside.

Then, he was touching her intimately, sliding his fingers between her legs to seek out her wetness. She gasped as he found the already aching nub between her legs and teased it slowly, causing her to squirm and coo beneath him.

Then, he was inside of her, pulling her bottom towards him and filling her with his throbbing need. Her moans grew louder as he plunged slowly into her again and again, moaning her name as he held her firming around the waist with his hands. The friction was intense as he sank deep inside her again and again, finally sliding his hands forward to cup her breasts and pulling her torso back toward him until her back was against his chest. His hips continued to grind into her from behind, hitting all the right angles as she cried out with the force of the orgasm that overwhelmed her without warning.

“That’s it. I love the sounds you make when you come. Keep going, love,” he moaned against her ear.

Amanda let herself go, allowing her body to take control and just feel what was happening to it. She wasn’t sure if it was this place they were in or how their feelings for one another had begun to change, but she had lost all sense of feeling self-consciousness and begun to really appreciate the incredible beauty of how their bodies melded together to create such intense explosions. Then all thought was gone as she became lost in wave after wave of climax that echoed and escalated until she had nothing left to give.

It was like this for the entirety of their stay. They wandered the streets of Paris enjoying the people and the places during the day and went to galleries or find restaurants at night, making love every night in their wonderful hotel suite before falling asleep in one another’s arms. It was too incredible to put into words how it felt to be with Jagger. He was older and knew how to touch her body in ways she had never even imagined.

It occurred to her that she didn’t know exactly how old he was, but she was guessing that he was at least 40, which wasn’t much younger than her father. From time to time she considered that her parents would not be pleased with her new choice of boyfriend, but it did not matter. She was in falling in love.

If Amanda had any doubts about Jagger, they were laid to rest after their wonderful getaway to Paris. Though she had not yet gotten up the gumption to say it, she knew she loved him and it felt like he loved her too. Saying “I love you” always seemed to change things between people and she just wasn’t ready for that yet.

Plus, there was always that little fear that she was wrong about his feelings or that she might say it too soon and he would be put off by how serious things had become. When it came right down to it, there was so much she didn’t know about Jagger and how could you really say you love someone if you don’t know all there is to know about them?

When things continued to go well between them, she forgot all about her qualms and just let their relationship go wherever it would. So far, that had been only great places, but as they sat at the shop drinking lattes one morning before he went to see a client she found herself wondering something that had only occurred to her just now.

“Jagger, why haven’t I ever been to your place?” she asked, feeling she should just be direct with her concern.

“I don’t know. I haven’t thought about it. Your place is so much cozier, I suppose. Mine is this big structured place. All cold marble and steel. We can go there if you like,” he said, seemingly nonplussed by her curiosity.

“I would. I’d like to at least just see what sort of place you live in,” she replied, glad that he didn’t seem upset by the inquiry.

“Say no more, we will have dinner at my place tonight. I will call Honey and ask her to whip up something special, just for my love,” he said.

Amanda was suddenly torn between the elation she felt over being referred to as his love, even though they had not yet exchanged those three little words and the twinge of jealousy she felt over him having someone he referred to as “Honey” in his house.

“Honey?” she parroted back to him.

“Yes, she’s got to be a hundred years old but not a streak of gray, a headful of honey wheat colored hair. Everyone that I have ever met refers to her as Honey, probably at her behest, considering that her given name is Wilhelmina,” he laughed, seeming to miss her momentary disdain altogether.

“Oh,” Amanda laughed. She found that she was already looking forward to spending an evening at his house, seeing how he lived when he wasn’t with her.

“I have to run for now. I will stop by and pick you up at closing time. I’ll have the car service take me home so we won’t have to walk,” he told her.

“No, you don’t have to do that. It’s not that far,” she objected.

“I know, but I also know how tired you are after all day in this shop and I have to have the car for a meeting, so I’ll just hang on to it long enough to pick you up and take you home with me. See you in a while,” he said, kissing her on the cheek as he got up to leave the shop.

“See you tonight,” she responded, watching him walk away.

Amanda felt a little nervous as she began closing up the shop. It was going to be exciting to be at his place for the first time, but she was a little apprehensive about it, as well. Who knew what she would find there in his private world? She chastised herself for thinking the worst. Had she become so jaded by her own bad luck that he couldn’t accept how well things were going for her now?

After the short drive to his place and a ride to the top floor in an elevator that opened into a large hallway that had been renovated into a library area, Amanda found herself standing in the doorway to his place. She felt a little overwhelmed as she realized he was in the penthouse suite that spanned the entire top floor of the building. He was right about it being somewhat cold. It looked more like a museum than a home.

The only signs of life were the two of them, the small staff and Stella, who met them at the door. After a brief tour of the rather large place, he excused himself for just a moment to change, leaving her in the care of his maid, Victoria.

“Victoria, I need to make a quick phone call and my cell phone has died. Is there a landline somewhere that I can use?” Amanda asked.

“Absolutely,” Victoria responded, indicating that she should follow her to the study Jagger had shown her during their whirlwind tour.

“Thank you so much,” Amanda told her, picking up the phone to call her mother. She had forgotten that she was supposed to stop by after work and wanted to let her know she would stop by tomorrow instead. As she waited for the phone to be answered and then had a brief conversation, she found herself looking at a photograph of Jagger and a woman. She was standing behind him, with one hand draped over his shoulder and joined with his own. Both of them were smiling happily at the camera.

The same woman was on a nearby wall in a solo photograph that appeared to have been taken on a mountain side somewhere. She was in hiking gear, looking as if she was making her way up a steep slope on which she had paused and looked back for an impromptu photo. Amanda was guessing that the photographer was Jagger. Who was this woman and why was she all over his study?

She heard a sound at the door and looked up to see Victoria looking at her, checking to see if she was done, no doubt. Amanda was guessing she was now thinking twice about letting her in here and anxious for her to come out before Jagger returned from changing clothes.

“Victoria, who is this woman?” she asked, trying to keep her voice even, as if it was just a passing curiosity. She wasn’t even sure now if Jagger’s staff was aware that he had been seeing her all this time. Victoria might just think she was a friend or casual acquaintance even and not think about answering.

“That is Cassandra. She is Mr. Remington’s fiancée,” Victoria responded with a clueless smile.

“Is? He is engaged?” Amanda said, feeling as if someone had just punched her.

“Oh, no. I’m sorry. She was. Cassandra died more than a year or so ago. Cancer. It was horrible. She was so ravaged by the disease that they couldn’t even fulfill her wishes of being an organ donor except for her eyes,” Victoria said with a sad tone. Amanda stood staring at her for a moment.

“Her eyes....” Amanda repeated as her heart thumped wildly in her chest. Bits and pieces fell together suddenly. Could it be true? How could he have known? Surely they didn’t relay that kind of information to those left behind.

“Are you done with the phone?” Victoria asked kindly, not realizing what she had just relayed to their guest, but obviously noting that something was wrong.

“Yes, yes. I’m done. Please tell Mr. Remington that I had to leave,” Amanda said weakly, walking around the desk and out the door past Victoria. She made her way quickly to the front door and raced down the hallway to the elevator, pushing the button repeatedly to get it open before Jagger followed her. She just couldn’t see him right now. It wouldn’t be good.

Back at her apartment, her mind raced. What had he done? Why had he done it? It was clear that he had lost someone he had loved, still loved, judging from the pictures on his wall. She had died a long, drawn out death and at the end, all he had left of her were her eyes. It couldn’t be that somehow he had managed to track Amanda down and...and what? It was too mind-numbing to consider.

By the time she reached her place, she had a headache, a heartache and her phone was ringing. She pulled it from her purse and saw that it was Jagger before silencing it and then powering it off. No way could she talk to him right now. She had to think this through and try to make sense of it. Instead, she fell asleep crying on the sofa, consuming the bottle of wine she had in her cabinet in the process to numb the pain. The doorbell not only went unanswered but she was completely unaware that it rang.

The following morning, she found Jagger waiting for her as she unlocked the coffee shop. Her head hurt, her pride hurt and the last person she wanted to see was him.

“What are you doing here?” she asked.

“What do you mean? I was worried. I came from the bedroom last night to have dinner with you and Victoria said you had left suddenly. I was afraid something had happened at the shop or with your parents. When you didn’t answer my calls, I came by the apartment to check on you but there was no answer. For all I knew you were in the hospital or something worse,” he told her, the edge in his voice very noticeable.

“Something worse? Like what? Were you afraid I had gotten cancer and would have to give up Cassandra’s eyes to someone else you would have to stalk?” she blurted out, ignoring the people walking down the sidewalk that looked her way. She walked into the shop and Jagger followed, but she cut him off, sandwiching him between herself and the door.

“Amanda, it’s not what you think….” he tried to tell her.

“Why didn’t you tell me about Cassandra?” Amanda demanded angrily.

“Oh, God, Amanda. I wanted to, but it never seemed to be the right time and after things began to get serious between us, I didn’t want you to think that you were some sort of rebound. I didn’t want you to think that I was still hung up on my dead fiancée,” he told her, his voice full of regret.

“Is that all, Jagger? Is that all you should have told me?” Amanda spat at him.

“Amanda...I don’t know what to say,” he responded, looking dismayed and at a rare loss for words.

“Is it true? Are these her eyes, Jagger? Do I owe my sight to your loss? Is that why you are with me? Tell me that you aren’t with me just because I have some tiny piece of Cassandra implanted in me,” Amanda screeched, now feeling the pinnacle of her rage at him. His silence spoke volumes, as he looked down at his hands without saying a word. “Get out. I can’t talk to you right now. Just leave and let me get my shop open. We won’t be serving coffee to you today, by the way.”

“Okay, Amanda, but we need to talk about this soon,” he said weakly.

“No, we needed to talk about this a long time ago. Now, we only need to talk about it because I found out on my own. Go!” She was angry and hurt and she needed him to leave. Thankfully he did that, turning to go without another word. She locked the door behind him and went into the kitchen to get ready for the day, seething the entire time. The rest of the day was spent just trying to maintain a pleasant demeanor toward her customers, though her hair bristled once as she saw Jagger walk by and peep in nervously.

After another long night at home during which she barely slept and continued to cry, she dragged herself out of bed and went to open the coffee shop, as usual. She felt much calmer, though still very upset about things. She kept waiting for Jagger to come through the door and was surprised when the end of the day neared and there was still no sign of him. He was wrong and she was devastated, but some part of her had hoped he would show up and give her some explanation that would make everything better. It appeared that wouldn’t be the case. After closing up, she went to her parents’ house, telling her mother everything and finding herself in tears once again.

“You’ve been under a lot of strain and perhaps your father and I put too much on you too soon, then this has happened. How about you and I get away for a while? We can drive down the coast to Aunt Mary’s house in South Carolina. It’ll be good for the both of us to see some family and I can show you all my old haunts from when I grew up there. It’s beautiful there in the summer,” her mother offered.

“I can’t, Mom. I have the shop,” Amanda said woefully.

“Your father has been tending that shop for years. He can manage it for a week while we have a girl only vacation. What do you say? Want to Thelma and Louise it with your Mom?” her mother said.

“I’m not driving off any cliffs,” Amanda said with the tiniest hint of a smile.

“Fair enough, but if we run across Brad Pitt on the way, we are definitely picking him up!” her Mom laughed.

“Mom! I’m telling Dad!” Amanda joked. Leave it to her Mom to instantly make things better.

“There can be no tattling on a girl’s trip,” her mother warned playfully, mussing up her hair like she had when she was a little girl and then smoothing it back down as she leaned in to kiss her on the top of the head. “It will all be okay.”

“Thank you, Mom. I love you,” Amanda told her. She was filled with melancholy, but was glad to be doing this. They made plans to leave in a couple of days, but her father would take over the shop in the morning, giving Amanda time to get ready for the trip and decreasing her chances of running into Jagger at the shop if he decided to stop by. High on her agenda was a quick trip to the optometrist for a new set of contacts. Hopefully, they could order them and they would arrive before she returned from her trip.

Amanda was anxious about running into Jagger before she left. She didn’t know what she would say or do if she did. Her phone was noticeably silent and his lack of an effort spoke volumes to her, even at the same time she was dreading any interaction. Obviously, she had been right and she was just an inferior substitute for Cassandra. Her mind went back to the night he had stumbled drunk into the shop and kissed her, mumbling the other woman’s name.

She played things over and over in her mind as she and her mother drove to South Carolina a couple of days later. It all made sense now. Somehow, Jagger had found how who she was and pursued her for no other reason than she was all he had left of his fiancée. It was sad and, on some level, Amanda felt sympathetic. However, at the end of the day, she had to accept that there was nothing more to their relationship than a pair of corneas that had brought them together.