The Friendship Matchmaker (11 page)

It was the day of our field trip to the zoo that it hit me hard. As we lined up for the bus, I panicked about the seating arrangements. We’d always made sure to get in line first to get the back seat. We’d never failed. But this time they lined up toward the end of the line, even letting others go ahead of them as they spoke about the computer games they’d played at Ellie’s house on Saturday afternoon. By the time we boarded, the backseat was full. Ellie and Vicky headed for a two-seater, and I was left in the aisle, alone, confused, humiliated. All the seats were taken, so I ended up sitting next to the teacher.

I went home and swore I’d never let myself be put in that situation again. Slowly I started
work on my Manual, a do-it-yourself guide to Making and Keeping friends. I tried to make sense of the Rules, understand how the playground worked. I listened to people’s conversations, watched how kids interacted. I became a psychologist and tried to read people’s minds.

I always thought Ellie and Vicky had ditched me because of something I had done or said. Maybe I wasn’t cool enough for them anymore. Maybe my conversations were boring or I was wearing the wrong clothes. I was racked with doubt.

And then the best thing in my life happened.

Over summer break the local council changed the zoning maps, and Ellie and Vicky moved to another school.

The first day of sixth grade I came to school a new person. I was going to use my mistakes to help other kids so they’d never have to go through what I did.

The Friendship Matchmaker was born.

And here were Ellie and Vicky now, crashing my aquarium field trip, bringing back painful memories.

I felt dizzy and shaken.

“How are you?!” Ellie squealed.

Vicky grabbed my arm. “We’ve missed you!”

For a second my heart skipped for joy. I’d dreamed of a happy reunion so many times. A chance to go back to how we’d been. But when I studied their faces, I realized how fake they were acting and remembered that not once had they called or e-mailed me.

“I’m great,” I said meekly. “It’s been the best year of school …”

“Imagine seeing our
best friend
again,” Vicky cried in a high-pitched voice. “After all this time!”

Ellie smiled insincerely. “Vicky and I started ballet again. We have
so
much fun. They put us together in all the concerts. They treat us like we’re twins.”

Vicky giggled. “Well, that’s not the first time people have said that about us.”

“Are you still dancing?” Ellie asked, twirling a lock of hair around her finger.

“No,” I replied, suddenly noticing they were wearing matching friendship bracelets.

“Remember how much fun the three of us used to have?” Vicky said dreamily. “Every year the teachers used to tell our parents that we couldn’t be separated. Remember that, Lara?”

That’s when I noticed Emily out of the corner of my eye. She was watching us, listening to every word. Knowing she was seeing all this somehow made it even worse.

I fought back tears. I wanted to run away.

“Hey, Lara,” Ellie said. “Remember when
we all cried in third grade because they were going to put you in Mr. Lux’s class and keep Ellie and me in with Ms. Hunter? Our parents came to the school and begged them to put us in Mr. Lux’s class with you, and they did!”

“Yeah,” I said softly. “I remember.”

They kept on talking.

“Remember when we worked out that the first letter of our first names nearly spelled love?”

“Remember when we were all teddy-bear ballerinas at the holiday pageant?”

“Remember how we used to share our allowance and buy lollipops from the store?”

I couldn’t take it any longer. “I’ve got to go back to my class,” I said, and rushed off without saying good-bye.

I wanted to run to the bathroom and cry.

All of a sudden the aquarium seemed to have emptied out. Kids from our class were the only ones around, and the teachers were nowhere to be seen. But as I passed our group I heard a loud commotion. Chris was holding up a book and reading aloud from it. Some of
the kids were roaring with laughter. I couldn’t figure out what was happening.

That’s when I saw Bethany, her face blotchy with tears. Claire and Jemma were comforting her. Tanya was beside them. She was hunched up, arms folded across her chest. She looked miserable.

I looked over at Chris. My bag was open at his feet. My body felt like lead as I realized what he was reading: “‘But most of all she doesn’t have anything to talk about. Just smiles or shrugs. Need to fill her head with conversation topics …’ Oh, and then there’s this about Bethany: ‘A real hopeless case and really bordering on being promoted to number three on my Total Loner list, except Tanya’s sniffing habits are freaky and scare people (which is a problem when you need to match a friend to her) and she doesn’t talk (shy people are always hard to match).’ This is
hysterical
!” He caught sight of me and waved. “Lara, you’re a genius!”

I wanted a hole to open up under me. Bethany looked over, sniffling and wiping
her nose with a crumpled tissue. Claire and Jemma were giving me dirty looks. And then Chris topped it all off.

“But wait, here’s the best part! Even I get a mention: ‘Note to self: Chris loves picking on Tanya. Need to work out how to get her out of his sights. (But honestly, sometimes you can understand why.)’ Gold!”

Tanya winced. Our eyes met. Then she ran off, crying.

I couldn’t move. I was fixed to the spot and having an out-of-body experience at the same time.

“How could you write such nasty stuff?” Claire spat.

“We thought you were here to help us,” Jemma said with a glare.

David, Stephanie, and Kevin looked on. Judging from the expressions on their faces, I guessed Chris had read out loud what I’d written about them too.

“I … I …” My tongue felt fat and furry. I couldn’t talk. I didn’t even know what I could say in my defense.

Suddenly Emily stepped up beside me and threw her arm around my shoulder.

“Don’t any of you
dare
judge Lara! If you hadn’t noticed, she has put her whole life on hold for you and everybody else at school. Every single kid whining about this person not talking to them, or that person ignoring their e-mails, comes to her for help. It’s any wonder she has time to eat with all the work she has helping you all out!”

I stared at her in disbelief.

“None of you can pretend you don’t have those habits she wrote about. Yes, David, I’ve seen you talking to your basketball.”

David looked embarrassed.

“As for you, Chris, going through people’s bags is
not
an act of friendship! Bethany, as much as I love hanging out with you, I’d rather not see your tonsils when you talk to me, and not everybody wants to hear about global warming twenty-four-seven!”

To my surprise Claire and Jemma started nodding in agreement, although they still had their arms around Bethany.

“And Stephanie, you need to learn how to count to ten between each sentence. But guess what, everybody? In spite of all this, the only person who stuck up for you and tried to find you happiness at school was Lara! And now you’re turning against her because Chris, who has a brain the size of my thumbnail, wants to stir up trouble. You should know better!”

“Hey! What did I do?” Chris said, throwing his hands up.

Emily leaped toward him, grabbed the Manual from his hands, and told him to shut up before she told Ms. Pria he’d tried to climb into the crocodile tank. “And you better believe I’d lie to get you in trouble, and don’t think Ms. Pria wouldn’t give me the benefit of the doubt over you.”

Chris glared at Emily but didn’t say anything. Then he hurried off before Emily kept her word.

The strangest thing happened next. David, Stephanie, and Kevin walked up to me.

“I’m not upset, Lara,” David said.

“Yeah, me neither,” Kevin added with a shrug.

“It’s true,” Stephanie said. “You were the only one who truly wanted to help me.”

I smiled shyly at them. “Still, I’m sorry about what I wrote. It was pretty awful stuff when I think about it now.”

Their smiles reassured me that all was forgiven. I then walked over to Bethany.

“Sorry, Bethany,” I said softly. “I didn’t mean to hurt your feelings.”

She sniffed and then half smiled. “It’s okay, Lara. You didn’t say anything that wasn’t true. I can’t help it, though. That’s just who I am. That’s probably why you never found me a friend. I was just too hard.”

“That was my fault, not yours,” I said. “You’ve got Claire and Jemma now. You’re popular. And you didn’t have to change a thing about yourself. My Rules were wrong. You didn’t need me to be happy.”

I turned to Emily and gave her a grateful smile. She handed me my bag and Manual.

Ms. Pria suddenly appeared. “Why are
you all dawdling instead of finishing your multiple-choice questions? Come on! We haven’t got all day.”

The others dispersed, leaving Emily and me in front of Ms. Pria.

“Can I go to the bathroom?” I asked Ms. Pria.

“Fine, but you have to go in pairs.”

I looked at Emily and she nodded.

Ms. Pria sent us off with a strong warning to return to the group as quickly as possible.

As I expected, we found Tanya crying in the bathroom. She’d locked herself in one of the stalls.

“Please open the door, Tanya,” I pleaded. Emily stood next to me, looking worried.

“Go away,” she said, and hiccuped.

“I’m an idiot, I know,” I said. “I’m so sorry. Everything I wrote about you was wrong and stupid. It was before I knew you.”

“But, Lara, you said I don’t have anything to talk about,” Tanya said from behind the stall door.

“I know, Tanya, and I’m sorry. Remember, this was before I got to know you.”

“What kind of an excuse is that? You only make horrible assumptions about people when you don’t know them? Isn’t that why you’re a Friendship Matchmaker? To help kids who get picked on and judged?”

Her words hit me hard, and I lowered my head in shame.

She opened the door. We took a step back to let her out. Her face was streaked with tears. I felt awful.

“But even when you got to know me, didn’t you once wonder why I was so different at school from when I was with you?”

“I … I just thought you were shy at school … with other kids …”

She sighed. “Remember I told you I was writing a how-to manual as well?”

I nodded and she continued.

“It was actually a survival guide.”

“Surviving what?” Emily asked.

“Divorce.”

I couldn’t believe it. I had no idea.

“My parents just separated, Lara,” Tanya said softly. “Right before the summer. My brother and I are living with Mom. We’re with Dad every weekend. It’s … horrible. And it’s so hard on my little brother. So when I come to school it’s hard to be my normal self with everybody. Most days I just want to go to the library and cry in a corner.”

I felt winded. If I’d been a teeny-weeny bit sensitive I wouldn’t have missed it. I thought back to all the hints she’d dropped. Wanting to wear clothes her mom had made her. Going all quiet when we spoke about her parents.
Visiting
her dad to play basketball.

A Friendship Matchmaker was supposed to listen. To care about people’s feelings and their stories. All I’d done was try to turn Tanya into a different person. I hadn’t respected her, or bothered to care about what she was going through.

“Tanya, I don’t know what to say. If it makes any difference, I came to school today to tell you that I was finished looking for a best
friend for you. I was hoping you’d think of me as your best friend …” I stole a glance at Emily who smiled but didn’t interrupt me. “I would understand now if I’m the last person in the world you would want to be friends with,” I finished.

Tanya looked at me in surprise and then blew her nose. She didn’t say anything for a while. When I didn’t think I could take the silence anymore she finally spoke up.

“Can we talk about what we want, at school and out of school? No banned topics? No Fashion Rules or books-to-read guidelines?”

I held up my Manual in front of them. I flicked through it, skimming my Rules and advice. Emily was right. I’d been thinking of school in the worst possible way. I was teaching kids to trust no one, especially themselves. I made a sudden decision and rushed to the garbage can and dropped the Manual in it.

“Sorry, Harry Potter’s publishers,” I whispered.

Then I turned to Tanya. “No more Rules or lists,” I said firmly.

The three of us grinned.

“So homemade T-shirts are allowed?” she asked coyly.

“Yeah, sure,” I said cheerfully.

“But the school-supplies sniffing isn’t coming back, is it?” Emily said worriedly.

“Only in times of high stress,” Tanya joked. “You just can’t imagine how good a ruler smells during history tests.”

We laughed, and then Emily and I waited outside the bathroom while Tanya washed her face and tried to get her puffy eyes back to normal size.

“So,” Emily said confidently, folding her arms across her chest, “looks like we have a tie.”

“Yep,” I said. “Everybody’s a winner.”

“We obviously have our individual talents. I bet if we went into this Friendship Matchmaking business together we could make this the best school in the world. Bully-free and without a lonely person in sight. We could write another Manual! Do speed-friendship sessions at lunchtime! Start an online Friendship Matchmaker service on the school’s website!”

“Whoa!” I cried, holding my hands up to stop her from continuing. “Believe me, it all sounds very tempting. But, for once, I’m going to take some time off and enjoy being a best friend. After all, I’m Potts County Middle School’s Friendship Matchmaker. And I’ve just made the best match of my career.”

Thank you to Dyan Blacklock for giving me the chance to turn back time and become a middle schooler all over again! It’s been a pleasure working with the team at Omnibus. Thank you, Gina Inverarity, for your meticulous editing. Thanks are also due to my wonderful agent, Sheila Drummond. Thanks, Sally Ahmed, for your advice and suggestions.