The Forever Dream (24 page)

The fragile silver carol seemed to be interwoven with the color, filling her, intoxicating her with beauty until the tears were brimming in her eyes. She finally stood quite still and let that beauty flow into her. "It's too lovely," she whispered over the painful tightening of her throat. "It's so lovely that it's hurting me."

"That wasn't the idea." Jared's voice was gentle. "It's supposed to heal you. I remembered what you said about the wind chimes healing your hurt when you were a child. I figured there couldn't be too much of a good thing." He came forward and took her hand. His slender, black-clad figure was a dark flame against the rainbow-dazzling aura surrounding them, and his expression was grave. "I want to heal all the pain you ever knew, little Piper. Will you let me do that?"

He was drawing her with him to the edge of the cliff, his hand warm and secure around her own and his eyes holding hers with that same loving steadiness. He stopped when they were under the birch tree where he'd been sitting that first day. It clung to the very edge of the precipice, and it, too, was covered with wind chimes that sang in the brisk breeze that whipped across the mountain.

Jared slipped an arm around her waist and stood with her only inches from the drop to the valley below. "Remember this, love." His voice was a husky murmur in her ear. "Remember the color and the wind song. Remember the beauty. How could fear and ugliness exist in a world this lovely? It was all a bad dream and now the nightmare is over, never to return. Whenever it tries to come back, you'll remember the beauty and the wind song and it will go away again." His lips brushed the delicate veins at her temple. "All you have to do is accept it to make it so, Tania."

She was accepting it, she discovered with a little tingle of incredulous joy. The ugly memory of that horror when she'd dangled helplessly in an agony of fear was being released and floating away as she stood there. She was being healed by the enchantment of the world Jared had created for her, and it was the act of creation itself that was the most effective balm. That he'd cared enough to go to these gloriously extravagant lengths to help her was the most magical wind chime of all.

She turned to him, her magnificent dark eyes blazing and her lips trembling with a vulnerability that brought her no sense of shame. "Thank you," she said simply. No words were adequate at the moment. "I will remember forever, Jared."

Forever. Again that word, but this time she knew she spoke only the truth. No matter how far their forever stretched, she would remember the bright radiance of this instant.

He inhaled sharply and took an impulsive half-step forward. He halted abruptly. There was a pulse pounding erratically in the hollow of his throat, and his silver eyes were glowing with a deep, burning flame. He closed his eyes and made an obvious effort at control. He deliberately released her, his arm dropping from her waist as he stepped back. "That's all that's important," he said quietly. Then, incredibly, he was turning to leave!

"Jared?" Her eyes were wide and questioning.

"Stay here," he said gently. "It will be good for you to be alone for a while."

"You're leaving?" she asked disbelievingly.

"I find I'm not quite as self-sacrificing as I'd thought. I don't want to blow the whole purpose of the exercise by grabbing something for myself." One finger reached out to feather the curve of her cheek. "This is for you, little Piper." Then he was gone, striding swiftly through the rainbow-dappled grove like a dark, powerful shadow.

She gazed after him until he disappeared from view. He had lavished a multitude of gifts upon her this day, and not the least of them was that generosity of spirit which had prompted his departure. She knew he'd wanted her with an intensity that had nearly broken his control only a few minutes before, but he'd given her the gift of his restraint as simply as he'd wrapped her in the warmth of this magnificent ermine cloak. There was no question in her mind which was the more valuable present.

She leaned against the slender column of the birch tree, her eyes on the fiery sphere that was sinking behind the dusky purple-violet of the mountains. She felt almost affectionate toward those towering peaks, she realized with amazement. Jared had given her that also, and the knowledge caused that tentative budding she'd experienced the night of the shooting to begin to unfold its petals in a poignantly beautiful blossoming.

Was it love? She didn't know and really didn't care. How could she put a label on something she'd never experienced? It was enough to feel this overwhelming desire to give and take, to belong to another human being on levels she'd never conceived possible. She had received precious gifts today that she must return in kind. It was how those gifts should be presented that she must decide. For a moment she felt an odd rush of shyness, before she quickly smothered it. She lifted her chin proudly, her eyes on the moon, which was gaining glittering prominence now that the sun had gone down. There was nothing to be shy about. She was the Piper, wasn't she?

Her sudden joyous laughter echoed on the clear night air as she began to make her plans. She stayed there a long time while the moonbeams turned the wind chimes to silver tears and the breeze played mysterious melodies in the branches of the trees.

The moon was high in the heavens when she quietly opened the door to Jared's room a few hours later. The heavy velvet drapes on the French windows across the room were drawn back and the moonlight was streaming in, revealing the outlines of the heavy antique furniture in the master suite.

"Welcome home, sweetheart." The voice came from the confines of the huge canopy bed in the center of the room. "Do you know how long I've waited for you to walk through that door?"

"You were expecting me?" She glided forward, the white ermine cape billowing gracefully out behind her. She could dimly discern his lean, shadowy form on the bed, several pillows propped up against the headboard behind him. "If I'd known that, I wouldn't have kept you waiting," she said teasingly. "You could have let me know, Jared."

"Not expecting," he said quietly. "Hoping, love." She was close enough now to see the polished bronze of his naked shoulders and the dark curling thatch of hair on his chest, which narrowed to a thin line where the satin sheet was pulled carelessly over his flat stomach. "There's quite a difference. I'd never insult you by taking you for granted."

She could feel her heart hammering against her ribs as she slowly unfastened the buttons of the cloak. "I'm afraid I've committed that particular faux pas already," she said a trifle breathlessly as she shrugged out of the cloak and draped the lovely thing on the back of the chair a few feet away. "Should I have waited for an invitation?"

"You know better than that," he said gruffly, his pale gray eyes glistening in the darkness of his shadowed face. "I've wanted you here in my bed for at least an eon or two."

"Good." Her hands were swiftly unbraiding her hair. "I'm glad you're going to support my seduction of you." She ran her fingers through her long tresses, and he had a fleeting memory of her small, vibrant figure clothed in scarlet chiffon, preparing for the tempting of the piper.

"Is that what you're doing, seducing me?"

She was still. "I thought that was what you wanted." There was a frown of uncertainty on her face as she peered at him through the dimness of the moonlit room.

"With utmost fervor, love." There was a reassuring thread of humor in his voice. "But that's not enough, not any longer. I feel I have need for the solace of the spoken word. In short, I want to know why, Tania. Why are you willing to come to me now?"

"What if I said it was lust?" she asked softly. "What if I said I didn't care what you thought or what you were, as long as you could give my body the pleasure you gave

it that first morning I was brought to the chateau? Would you still invite me to your bed?"

"You're damn right I would." He chuckled. "And then I'd do my very best to make you take back every word before morning. I've made a study of you, remember? I know that, as beautifully passionate as you are, you wouldn't be here if you didn't feel something else as well. What I want to know is, what is that something?"

She shrugged helplessly. "I just don't know," she said with bold honesty. "I've never felt like this before." She ran her tongue nervously over her lower hp. "It's strange. ..."

"I wouldn't want to include that eloquent avowal in a testimonial," he said dryly. "It might sound as though you're coming down with a rare tropical disease."

She laughed shakily. "Do you want promises? I can't give you that. It's all too new."

For a moment there was a flicker in his face that might have been disappointment, before he held out his hand to her. "No promises," he agreed quietly. "Perhaps that's the safest road for both of us. We'll just play it by ear."

"One step at a time," she said softly, placing her small hand in his and letting him tug her toward the bed.

She paused with one knee on the mattress, resisting the pull that would have brought her down into his arms.

"There's something you should know," she said, her voice hesitant. "I'm a virgin." She saw the shock that tensed his body, and rushed on. "Probably not in the physical sense. Ballerinas rarely are. But I've never known a man. If that turns you off, I'll understand."

"Windloe?"

"My friend," she answered with a little shrug that was awkward for someone so innately graceful. "At first I think he wanted to be something more, but in time he accepted that I couldn't be for him what he wished."

His gaze was narrowed intently on her face. "And why couldn't you do that? Your father?"

"I don't know," she whispered, her dark eyes wide and vulnerable. "It might have had something to do with it."

"And why do you feel differently now?"

Why was he asking these questions that she couldn't answer? "I just do." She threw out her hands in helpless frustration. "I trust you, Jared. I think if you'd asked me to jump off that cliff tonight, I'd have done it. Is that enough?"

"It's enough, love." His voice was husky. "For now, it's more than enough." With one strong tug he pulled her down into his arms.

His flesh was so firm and warm against her own that for a moment she couldn't breathe for the delicious shock of it, the heady scent of soap and musk surrounding him. She could see the molten gleam of his silver eyes as he looked down at her. "You don't mind my being a virgin, then?"

His lips nuzzled against the side of her throat. "It may present a few problems." He bit the lobe of her ear gently. "But nothing we can't overcome."

Her hands moved up to the smoothly corded muscles of his shoulders. "I like to touch you," she said softly. "You feel like steel sheathed in silk." Suddenly she frowned. "My own body isn't very pretty right now. My shoulder isn't altogether healed, and there are still bruises from the rope. I can't be very appealing. If you'd rather wait ..."

"I wouldn't rather wait," he assured her, an amused smile tugging at his lips. "I'll close my eyes so that I won't see all your many imperfections, sweetheart. Now, is there any other horrible surprise lurking for me, or may we proceed?"

"There are my feet," she said seriously. "I have very ugly feet. Dancers do, you know. I can't even promise that will get better."

He shook his head in amusement. He couldn't believe this. Where was the sensual siren who'd been driving him insane for the last three weeks? She was like an earnest little girl as she anxiously cataloged all her faults, and an aching tenderness tore at his heart strings. He tried to keep the huskiness from his voice as he said lightly, "Well, that's another matter entirely. I think I'm going to have to examine these monstrosities before we go any further." Then he was moving away from her, down her body, pushing up the satin of her nightgown and taking one small foot in his hand. "Yes, I can see why you felt you had to warn me," he said with a solemn frown. "Callouses"—his thumb lightly massaged the arch—"muscles, and I even detect a few tiny scars." He bent his head and lightly kissed her instep. "It's incredible that such ugly feet could produce magic like the Piper."

She felt a little shock run through her. The Piper. She'd let her inexperience and insecurity temporarily make her forget who she was. She wasn't a child, she was the Piper, and the tolerant amusement in Jared's voice must be changed to something more respectful of her status. She took her foot away and sat up in bed. "Perhaps I can do something to overcome that revulsion and make you forget how ugly I am," she said. "Let me think for a minute." Almost absently she pulled the nightgown over her head and threw it casually aside. She was totally naked now, her silky dark hair cascading over her shoulders and the exquisite line of her back. She heard him inhale sharply and felt a thrill of satisfaction run through her. "Let's see, I don't think you expressed any aversion to my breasts. Perhaps concentrating on them would distract you." She got to her knees so that she was facing him, and edged closer until the rosy tips her nipples were grazing his chest. "They're a bit on e small side, but you seemed pleased with them before." Her lips brushed the hollow of his throat, where the pulse was throbbing jerkily. "Do you like my breasts, Jared?"

"Yes, I like your breasts." They were exquisite breasts, he thought, perfectly formed, with sweet, perky nipples that blossomed passionately when he touched them with his lips and tongue. He wanted to touch them now, but he was afraid she'd revert back to that uncharacteristic insecurity. He'd not even considered the possibility that she was a virgin, and the primitive surge of pleasure he'd known had been followed by concern. He'd wanted their joining to be everything it could, and now he was going to have to move very carefully. He didn't want her uncertainty to cause her to lose even a minute portion of the pleasure that was to come. He'd hoped his teasing amusement would snap her into this aggressive vitality that was an integral element of her personality. The confidence that being in charge would give her would help ease her triumphantly into this new experience, but it was going to prove more difficult than he'd imagined to play a semipassive role, when all he wanted was to be inside her. He made a deliberate effort to steady his breathing. "They're very lovely breasts."