The Fall of Gods (A Welcome to the Underworld Novel, Book 2) (67 page)

She thought back to the secret Tae Hyun promised he'd share with her, the secret he feared would be so horrible that she wouldn't be able to look at him afterward. After everything that happened to her, Yoori couldn't help but feel her heart clench itself in fear. It was as if it was begging her to not dig any deeper into all this. It was as if it was begging her not to say anything because it needed Tae Hyun so much.

"Tae Hyun," she prompted tentatively. The next words boiled in her throat, begging to be set free. She couldn't be in the dark anymore.

"Hmm?" he responded distractedly.
He had just picked up the broken glass and was placing it on the damp paper towel. 

"If you could explain to me how you were raised to be the person you are…to justify the things that you have done…what would you say to me?"

She wanted to understand everything. She wanted to understand why he did the things that he did. 

A piece of glass pricked his finger just when she asked this.

Paying no mind to the cut, Tae Hyun gazed up, his eyes cloaked with turbulence when he finally noticed the red hat she was holding in her hands. 

It was clear that he wasn't mentally prepared for this.

"Yoori—" 

"It's an experiment," Yoori assured, feigning a light smile when she sensed his need to stall the conversation. "To see how well I know you since we've met."

She noted the stress exuding out of his once carefree stature. Tae Hyun rarely got nervous and he seldom showed it. This moment was a rarity. 

"I don't—"

"Just humor me. Please?" Yoori insisted with another one of her bright smiles. "What is the typical thing you say to someone you've just recruited?" Once she saw the obvious uncertainty in his eyes, she smiled wider. "
Please
?" 

She needed this
moment to prepare for what was to come. She needed this moment to just be with him for a little while longer before the downpour of emotions rippled around her and drowned her.

"There's a list of rules…that has been passed down from Underworld Kings to Underworld Kings," he began apprehensively. So many emotions twisted in his eyes, yet she couldn't read any of them.
 "I was taught to memorize it when I started my training at 10-years-old. It's a series of statements that I, as well as other Royals, repeat to ourselves every morning." 

"Can you share it with me?"

Tae Hyun was unreceptive to the request.

"I think you should eat first and rest. We can talk about this another day…
when you're feeling better," he amended delicately.

He picked up the broken glasses with the damp paper towel, walked out,
and tossed it into the trash outside before he returned to the room.

He was picking up the bowl of soup for her when Yoori said, "How about I eat
while you tell me?" 

She wouldn't let him push it to another day. Their agreement was that he would tell her the day after she agreed to be his girlfriend. He was supposed to tell her the day she found Chae Young in the diner.
 

That day had long passed.

The nerves in his jaw clenched. When it was clear that he was backed into a corner, Tae Hyun nodded stiffly, picked up the bowl and walked over to her. He sat on the side of the bed with her, picked up the silver spoon, dug into the soup, and fed Yoori her first spoonful. The heat of the soup warmed her tongue when he spoke. 

"Our world is different from the rest," he said just as she chewed some meat and veg
etable from the soup.

It took all of her control not to free the sob from her chest once she heard the strain in his voice – the guilt echoing from him. The strain confirmed that all of her speculations were accurate. He really
 
had
 been using her since the beginning. How ironic was it that she knew him well enough to detect guilt in his voice, yet she hadn't known he was using her all along?

"Some people find themselves stumbling into it whether willing or unwillingly…"
 

"How did you fall into it?" Yoori asked when she sensed his hesitation to continue. She parted her lips for the soup, her additional silent encouragement for him to go on.
 

"I was born into it," he answered wearily, feeding her another spoonful of soup. His face was paler now, completely drained of color. "That's why I'm here right now. That's why I have this much power. That’s why I can do whatever I want."
 

Yoori nodded while
she swallowed her soup, understanding that indeed he did have so much power in this world. 

"To be the leading hand in this world, you have to be flexible with your morals. You can't allow yourself to be weak. You have to be able to punish people without fear."

She also understood the lengths he was willing to go to further extend his power. Kwon Tae Hyun would sacrifice anything for power and using Yoori like she was an object was no exception to his determination. 

"Wrong or right, you have to stick by your decisions. Because if you don't…you'd end up destroying yourself. You can never forgive the ones who betrayed you. You have to make an example of them by reminding them what you're capable of."

He betrayed her. From the beginning, he betrayed her and this comprehension tortured Yoori. She swallowed past the tears rising through her as she thought about the feelings she had for him. 

Tae Hyun would never know the things he did to her, how much power he had over her. And now, to realize how that power was contrived, how it was purposeful instead of natural, Yoori couldn't have felt more betrayed. She not only felt stupidity, but she also felt immeasurable pain for this duplicity. Before she could help it, tears had already bubbled in her eyes as Tae Hyun fed her another spoonful of soup.
 

The truth hurts…

"Notoriety is everything. Make sure that they will never betray you again…finish them off. Remember this step…it's the most important one."

He swallowed miserably when he saw the tears bubble in her eyes. It looked like someone had just stabbed him in the chest. Yoori wondered what he felt terrible about. Was he miserable because she was crying or because he was caught?

He stopped talking and was silent with guilt until Yoori parted her mouth and waited patiently for another spoonful of soup. It was her quiet and 
painful 
way
of telling him to go on— to finish telling her the list of Underworld guidelines as she gathered her final strength for the turbulent conversation to come.

Tae Hyun went on with difficulty. "Kindness…is overrated. You have to be able to kill people like they are worth nothing. Even when you know for a fact, that's not true. You have to…show no remorse. If you show just an ounce of weakness…just one ounce…then you're done in this world."
 

He showed her kindness. That was why she fell for him. She thought
 he was different. She thought 
she
was different. She thought she had changed him and that she had touched a part of his soul. It was a silly wish on a hopeful girl's part and now, she was paying for her naivety. 

He used her
.

He was able to use her because she was worth
 nothing to him.

She
 wasn't different.

She was just worthless.
 

"That's why I am one of the best…" He exhaled in pain when he saw the first tear
drop fall from her eye.

Tae Hyun's betrayal…it was more painful than anything a knife or a bullet could ever hope to inflict on her. Hurt, humiliation and anger…was it possible for a single teardrop to contain all those emotions?

"It's truly a terrible thing," he added, his voice breaking faintly when he watched tears ease out of her eyes. "Terrible how unjust this world can be." 

No longer able to hold back, Tae Hyun reached out with the sole intent of wiping her tears away…
to hold her in his arms perhaps
…

Yoori wouldn't have any of it. She backed away from a worried Tae Hyun and crashed hard onto the headboard behind her. She refused to allow him to touch her. The strings of her heart twisted in agonizing knots. God help her if he touched her. If he showed her more thoughtfulness, then she would never be able to do what she had to do.

"It is only unjust for the people who kneel before you," Yoori finally breathed out with difficulty. "But just like all things in life, you should know that what goes around comes around.”

Her gaze became colder.

“No world can be unjust for so long. For every lie…there is a truth. For every injustice…there is revenge. For every empire…there is a downfall. For every temptation…there is a God who falls.” She smirked. “Just because you’re more powerful than human, just because the world kneels before you…does not mean you’re exempt from the cruelties of life.”

Her eyes ran over his taut face. “You’re merely living on borrowed time. You’re merely at the end of your rope. Rest assured…you will not always be this powerful. The time will come when you will have to step down from being a God and become human again. And when that time comes, you won't only have to face your demons…but you'll also have to answer to the people you've hurt."

She leveled her eyes with his.

"Your time has come," Yoori prompted decisively, swallowing past the lump of tears and fury rising through her.

Her once weakened eyes became cold, 
unforgiving
.

Their borrowed time was up.

"You can't keep me in the dark anymore. It's time you told your side of the story.”

“It’s time you told your side of the story.”

29: The Separation of Gods

“Was it your plan all along?” Yoori incited without delay. She had no more inclination to beat around the bushes. “To steal Ji Hoon’s girl? To use An Soo Jin’s lookalike to help you get to the top? To secure your position as the next Lord of the Underworld?”

She watched him rise quietly to his feet. Walking over to the
shelf, he placed the soup bowl above it. His back was turned to her as if to gather his nerves for everything to come. It was like he was preparing himself for an impending storm.

He turned around, his countenance paled with nothing but desolation. His enrapturing brown eyes held hers. There was nothing but unease in his gaze. Though all of this was seemingly difficult for him, he looked more than ready to tell her the truth.
 

“The plan was never to steal you from Ji Hoon. That thought didn’t cross my mind when I first saw you.”
 

Yoori ignored the whip of pain that slapped her face once she
 
finally
 heard his words of confirmation – once he finally confirmed that everything was planned from the beginning.

It was like she was living in a nightmare she couldn’t wake up from.

“When did you first see me?” Yoori asked swiftly, moving the conversation along before her emotions got the best of her. 

“I saw you two weeks before I met you at the diner,” Tae Hyun admitted, standing across from her.

He never appeared more human to her than at that moment. With all the power he had in this world, he didn’t have enough power to change the past. He didn’t have enough power to change the mistakes that would scar them forever. It was ironic. Their entire relationship was ironic. 

“You were sitting on a bench in the business district, reading a book when you caught my eye. I didn’t know
who you were, but I couldn’t take my eyes off of you. It wasn’t until the Serpents beside me caught sight of you, did they tell me that you were An Soo Jin.”

Yoori smirked to herself. So there was actually a moment in time where he knew of her existence long before she ever knew of his…

“And even then, I didn’t believe it. I had never met Soo Jin, so I wouldn’t know right from left when it came to her but I knew the things an Underworld Royal would do. I asked them, ‘Why the hell would An Soo Jin hang out in the busy business district when she was supposed to be dead?’ I really believed that you were just someone who resembled Soo Jin. It was too ironic that you were out there in the open for everyone to see and you were so aloof about it. So I dismissed it as nothing. I dismissed it as nothing, but I had a couple of my Serpents keep an eye on you." He shamefully looked away when he said the next part. "I stumbled upon an An Soo Jin lookalike. I made sure to keep a close leash on you just in case I ever needed you in the future.”

Her chest tightened, the air around her becoming insufficient.
 

“…
just in case I ever needed you in the future…”
 

His words taunted her.

How was it possible that this was the same person who stole her heart? The very same person who made her feel so much love? The emotions bearing down on her were overwhelming, but she endured it. She had to listen to everything before she allowed her emotions to drown her.