The Disappeared (34 page)

Moira looked
at Lindiwe with a wistful smile on her face. ‘Don’t worry about, Lindi.’

‘Are you sure?
I don’t just want to –’

‘Really,’
Moira said placing a hand on Lindi’s arm. ‘What does money mean now anyway? It’s
on the house.’

Lindiwe
squeezed Moira’s hand. ‘Thank you. I appreciate it.’ Lindiwe looked over at
Inspector Coetzee. She approached him. ‘Inspector?’ He looked at Lindiwe with tired
eyes flecked with quiet dejection. Lindiwe felt her heart constrict with
sadness. ‘Inspector ... are you okay?’

Coetzee smiled
wistfully. ‘I’m fine,
meisie
. Don’t worry about me. There are more
important things to worry about.’

Lindiwe nodded
and managed a pursed smile. ‘Inspector, would you mind ... if I took the
prisoner something to eat?’ Lindiwe could see that the Inspector was unenthusiastic
about her suggestion. She pushed harder. ‘He hasn’t eaten all day. I know
normally there would be someone to take care of that. But ...’ Coetzee
contemplated her words for a moment. He nodded with a wry look on his face. He
had to admit the logic of her words. ‘Okay. Just be careful, you hear.’ Lindiwe
nodded. ‘Would you like Sergeant Jansen or Collie to accompany you?’

Lindiwe felt a
pang of near-panic at the thought. ‘No, I’ll be alright. Really.’

Coetzee
nodded.
‘Oraait
.’ Lindiwe turned to leave. ‘Lindiwe.’ She turned to look
at the policeman. ‘Be careful. Satan is loose in this town.’ She nodded
sombrely. And walked out into the wan sunlight. If she had looked she would
have noticed the contempt with which Jansen noted her departure.

Outside the
silence was huge and pervasive. Lindi looked up at the sky. The cloud cover was
like toothpaste spat from a dirty mouth. With rapid little clickety-clack
footsteps she quickly bridged the distance between the Abbot and the Bishop
police station. She entered and was immediately struck by the awesome emptiness
of the place. After the chaotic scene of earlier that morning the room appeared
cavernous. And desolate. She realised it was the first time ever she had been
alone in the police station. She felt a momentary bolt of dread. Followed by an
intense sense of compassion for the prisoner who was locked up – all alone,
deserted and abandoned in the empty police station. Lindiwe flung open the door
that led to the interior and quickly made her way to the cells at the back. Joshua
had obviously heard her approach because he was standing – both hands wrapped
around the bars and face pressed against the cold iron. He looked immensely
pleased to see her again and gave her a little wave. ‘Hey. I didn’t think you
were coming back.’ He smiled wryly. ‘I thought you forgot about me.’

Lindiwe
gingerly walked up to the bars. ‘I didn’t.’ She held up the plate of sandwiches.
‘Here, I made you this.’ She tried to hand him the plate. There was a dull
clink as the plate collided with bars. Lindiwe rolled her eyes and smiled in
lop-sided embarrassment. ‘How silly of me. I forgot the plate wouldn’t fit.’

‘Don’t worry,’
Joshua said quickly. ‘Here, lemme take them.’ He reached through the bars and
grabbed the sandwiches with both hands. For a moment he stood awkwardly looking
at the neat sandwiches in his hands. ‘Uh ... It’s weird. I’m not really hungry.
I thought I was but ...’ He looked up and saw the dismay on Lindiwe’s face. ‘On
second thought, I’m starved.’ He stuffed a sandwich in his mouth chewing
vociferously. ‘Oh wow, wow, these are good ... wow!’

Lindiwe looked
on with amusement. ‘You don’t have to pretend for my sake, you know.’

‘No really,’
he said through a mouthful, ‘I wasn’t really hungry, but damn these are good.
Shit yeah, you’re a genius.’ He looked at Lindiwe with genuine gratitude. ‘Thank
you. You’re a saint.’

Lindiwe folded
her arms. ‘It’s just a sandwich.’

‘Yeah, I know.
But you didn’t have to. Thanks ... once again.’

She smiled. ‘It’s
a pleasure Mr Joshua Kingsley.’

Joshua
chuckled at the mention of his surname. He wolfed down the remaining sandwich.
And then gave Lindi a sly look. ‘So, uh, tell me, won’t your boyfriend mind? I
mean, you know ... you spending all this time with me?’ He didn’t look at Lindiwe
when he spoke, trying to feign indifference.

Lindiwe smiled,
amused at his obvious attempt to assess her love life. ‘Duggan’s not my
boyfriend.’

‘I wasn’t
talking about him.’

‘Well,’
Lindiwe said coyly seeing an opportunity for some fun, ‘now that you mention
it. He’s not too happy about it.’

Joshua stopped
chewing. ‘Oh yeah?’

‘I don’t know
why though,’ Lindiwe said innocently. ‘I mean he’s got nothing to be insecure
about. He’s definitely one of the hunks of Bishop. Half the girls in town would
kill to be with him.’

‘Really.’
Joshua looked markedly disappointed.

‘Oh yes.’
Lindiwe was enjoying this more than she should have. She couldn’t resist
though. She pushed the knife in deeper and twisted. ‘We’re getting married in
December.’ She placed the plate on the floor. Rose. And pressed both hands to
her breast while cooing with exaggerated elation. ‘I can hardly wait.’

‘Yeah, I can
imagine.’ Joshua stared at the cracked concrete in sullen dejection. ‘Well, I’m
glad for you.’ He sounded anything but glad.

Lindiwe sighed
with bliss. ‘Yes. And we’re going to have
many
babies. Lots and lots of
beautiful bouncing babies.’ By now she could barely suppress her laughter. ‘At
least ten. Maybe more.’

Joshua looked
up at her with horror. And saw her lips quivering with suppressed mirth. Lindiwe
burst out laughing. It felt good. So incredibly damn good.

‘Aaah.’ A
smile of recognition slowly surfaced on Joshua’s face. Gingerly at first. Not
sure whether she was joking or not. But then he too broke out in laughter. ‘Oh
man, you’re good. You’re really good. You had me going there for a while.’ The
relief in his voice was obvious. Lindiwe howled with laughter, tears streaming
down her face. It really did feel good to laugh again. Joshua stared at Lindiwe
through the iron bars in unconcealed admiration, enjoying her laughter. Then
uncertainty creased his face. ‘So ... uh, you
were
joking right. I mean,
about your boyfriend?’

Lindiwe wiped
the tears from her eyes. She was suddenly acutely aware of how much she was
enjoying his company. ‘Yes, Mr Kingsley. It was all in jest. At your expense,
of course.’ She giggled as she recalled the grave disappointment on his face.

Joshua
chuckled. ‘Yeah, you’re a funny one, you are.’

Lindiwe smiled
with tender sincerity at the young man behind the prison bars. She was feeling
better than she had done in a very long time. She couldn’t actually remember
when last she felt the way she now did, staring at him. There was a moment of
loaded silence as the two looked at each other. Normally the quiet would have
been awkward, with someone scrambling to fill the void with meaningless
blabber. But now the silence was peaceful and complete. Almost perfect. And in
the silence was born the sudden and undeniable realisation. Lindiwe was falling
in love with Joshua. She felt her face grow hot in embarrassment as if she had
spoken the words openly. ‘Well,’ she stammered, ‘I suppose I better be –’

Joshua reached
for her through the bars. ‘Please don’t go. Please stay here with me.’ He
looked at her with pleading eyes. ‘Please.’

Although she
pretended otherwise Lindiwe was glad Joshua asked her to stay. Her own nature
would have prevented her from doing so. And in any case she almost dreaded going
back to the mass anxiety and bottled hysteria of the restaurant with its
unpleasant personalities like Jansen and Jones. Here in the dark and ugly jail
cells she felt comfortable. With the stranger from out of town she felt
strangely at home. And yes. Even ... happy? ‘Okay. I’ll stay for a little
while.’

‘Good. Thank
you.’ Joshua looked around jail cell. ‘Uh ... I saw a chair in the
interrogation room.’ He smiled wryly. ‘I would get it for you, but unfortunately
...’ He shrugged.

‘It’s okay. I’ll
just sit here.’

‘Wait.’ Joshua
took off his thick lumber jacket and pushed it through the bars. ‘The floor is
cold. Sit on this.’

Lindiwe took
the jacket from him. ‘That’s not necessary. But thank you.’ She smiled at him. ‘You’re
a real gentleman.’ She smoothed out the jacket on the floor and sat on it, her
back against the wall. Joshua looked at her, beaming. Hands gripping the iron
bars. ‘So, are you going to sit down or is this going to be an official
interrogation?’ She asked.

Joshua
chuckled. ‘Oh yeah. Okay.’ He sat down on the cold concrete, legs crossed in a
lotus position. ‘Better?’

‘Much.’

Outside the dim
afternoon sun cast slanting rays through the dirty glass and the mesh wire of
the window high up on the wall of Joshua’s cell. They looked at each other,
relaxed in the silence that hung in the prison cell. Joshua was still beaming
uncontrollably. Bread crumbs clung to his lips. ‘So,’ he said looking at
Lindiwe with obvious pleasure, ‘how you doing?’

‘How am I
doing?’ Lindiwe stared up at the ceiling in exaggerated deliberation. ‘How am I
doing? Well, let me see ...’ She wanted to continue the light-hearted tone of
the questioning. To say something that would bring a smile to Josh’s face. But
to her consternation, her mind was filled only with images of that morning.
Gogo’s
empty house. Inspector Coetzee’s worry-stricken face. Minki crying. Duggan’s
untidy room as he explained his theories. And the empty streets of Bishop. The
empty streets. ‘Well, I ...’ Oh no. Not now. She tried so hard biting her lip.
Oh no. Not again. Joshua leaned forward looking at her with sudden concern.
Frowning hard. ‘Well ...’ Her lip began quivering. And then she just gave in.
Instant tears welled up in her eyes and then poured over her cheeks into her
mouth, down her chin, rolling down her long neck. ‘I’m ... I’m
fine
.’
She could barely say the words sobbing openly. To herself, Lindiwe sounded like
a little five-year old girl again. A feeling further enhanced by the obvious
absurdity of her words. She was
not
fine.

Joshua was on
his knees, body pressed tightly against the iron divide gripping the bars with
white knuckles. ‘Don’t cry. Please don’t cry.’ To Lindi it almost appeared as
if Joshua was about to cry himself. ‘I won’t let them hurt you. I promise. I’ll
protect you.’ There was something so pure and genuine and almost child-like
about his words. Lindiwe wasn’t sure whom Joshua was going to protect her from
but she saw that he meant every single word. His naked honesty touched her so
immediately and deeply that she cried even harder, sobbing hysterically now. She
rose onto her knees and leaned against the cold metal allowing him to embrace
her fiercely through the iron bars. ‘It’s okay,’ Joshua said. His voice choked
with emotion. ‘It’s going to be alright. We’ll make a plan. We’ll get outta
here, I promise.’ He cradled her head in his big hand, pressing her gently
against the vertical iron rods. ‘Please don’t cry.’

Lindiwe
suddenly withdrew, gently extricating herself from Joshua’s embrace. She wiped
the tears from her eyes feeling very foolish ... and vulnerable. ‘I’m so sorry.
I can be such a baby sometimes. I don’t know what came over me.’

‘Hey, it’s
okay. I understand completely. I mean, it’s been such a crazy day.’ Joshua looked
around. ‘I wish I could offer you a tissue or something.’

Lindiwe wiped
her cheeks with the back of her hand, shaking her head. ‘Don’t worry. I’m fine.’
She managed a weak smile. ‘Oh boy, do I feel silly right now. You must think I’m
some kind of hysterical woman ... crying at the smallest little thing.’

‘No, I don’t.’
Joshua stared at her with great intensity. ‘I think you’re beautiful.’

Lindiwe felt
fresh tears rise up in her eyes but stopped herself from crying anew. She
laughed through tears. ‘You’re so silly, Mr Kingsley.’ She placed a hand on his
arm. ‘But so sweet. Thank you.’

‘Hey ... I
mean it.’

Lindiwe nodded
smiling. ‘I just want you to know ... I don’t do this sort of thing ... you
know, all the time.’

‘Sure, I know.’

‘I mean, today
has been ... a bad day. But I’ve also been going through a ... a tough time
these last few months. It’s –’

‘I know.
Believe me, I understand.’ Lindiwe looked up and somehow saw that he really
did. His words hadn’t been the empty and meaningless phrases that people so
often employ in situations like these. He really
did
understand. For a
moment Lindiwe felt like an open book, with Joshua as the avid and perceptive
reader. It was disconcerting and yet – at the same time – it gave her an
immense sense of calm and peace. ‘When we met the first time this morning ...
in front of ... um ...’ He drove a hand through his thick hair looking around
awkwardly. He smiled. ‘Shall we sit?’ Lindiwe realised for the first time that
they were both still standing on their knees. She resumed her position on
Joshua’s jacket, smiling in embarrassment. Joshua also sat down but this time
he was right up against the prison bars. Without any sense of awkwardness
Lindiwe shifted closer to the cell door herself. Joshua took her hand in his. ‘When
I was much younger ... sjeez I was about –’ He stopped and laughed. ‘Listen to
me. I sound like an old man talking about his youth.’ Lindiwe giggled. ‘Any
case, when I was a lot younger, I had a stint with, um ... with heroin.’ He
looked at Lindiwe to gauge her reaction. ‘In a place like Brixton, it’s the
easiest thing in the world to get into.’ Lindiwe nodded. She knew Johannesburg only
too well. ‘I had been using for a couple of months and luckily I hadn’t started
mainlining yet. I was only smoking. But that’s bad enough. I mean I was hooked.
Badly. Things were starting to get bad ... and then Davey found out.’ Lindiwe
frowned. ‘David,’ Joshua said in response to her wordless question. ‘My older
brother. He’s completing his erm ... Honours degree or something at UJ. Busy
working on his first novel. Real clever. Really.’ Joshua paused for a moment,
sadness in his eyes. Lindiwe could see that Joshua harboured a deep love for
his brother.