The Dastard (26 page)

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Authors: Piers Anthony

Tags: #Humor, #Fantasy, #Science Fiction, #Young Adult

BOOK: The Dastard
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Melody struggled, but the stasis remained absolute; she could not even twitch a toe. The Hag did know what she was doing, unfortunately.

Then she saw something coming. It was a spirit, but this one was fresh and full and esthetic. In fact it was beautiful. What a change that restoration had made! How could a creature as ugly in every way as the Sea Hag become so lovely?

“Melody!” a voice came.

That wasn't the Sea Hag. That was Rhythm! Melody tried to cry out warning, because of the returning spirit, but couldn't.

The spirit came closer, looking even more beautiful. “Melody, it's me.”

Now Melody saw that the lovely spirit was attached to a body. It wasn't the Sea Hag, it was her sister! Coming to rescue her. Again. But she still couldn't respond.

Rhythm arrived. “There you are! I hadn't expected you to be invisible. Come, you are free now.”

Free? Hardly.

Harmony bent over her body. “Let me explain. The Sea Hag is gone. She isn't coming back. As soon as we nullify that stasis spell, you'll be free.” She brought out her little drum and beat a pattern on it.

The freeze lifted. Melody sat up, feeling gloriously free. The dreadful Sea Hag really was gone. “How did you do it?” she asked, singing herself visible. Then, seeing her weirdly feathered hands, she sang them back to normal. “I thought there was no way.”

“Sim went to Ptero and found a way,” Rhythm said. “We had to catch her when she went behind the plugged monster.”

“But she'll come back,” Melody said.

“No. She's trapped there. She can't return to Xanth.”

“But how can that be? She said the monster is no barrier to her spirit.”

“That was because the monster had no soul of its own. Now it does.”

“It does?”

“Remember that soul we were going to give the Dastard? We had to use it for this. Now the monster has it, and is opaque to the passage of other spirits. It represents a spirit block as well as a physical block.”

“I never thought of that!”

“None of us did. Except Sim. Still, we had to get the Sea Hag to go there. So we thought if we stressed her some, and then let her seem to escape, she might get careless. Then we could block her out of Xanth, and rescue you. And it worked!”

Sim, invisible, squawked. “That's right!” Melody said. “The Dastard can still unhappen this unPossession, and I'll be captive again. There's no way I can escape it, if he decides to do it.”

“I hadn't thought of that,” Rhythm said. “We haven't won yet.”

“Indeed we have not,” Melody agreed, feeling a horrible shiver.

Xanth 24 - The Dastard
Chapter 13: CASTLE MAIDRAGON

Becka couldn't figure out what was happening. Or unhappening. Each time the Sea Hag was about to seduce the Dastard with the princess' body, Becka had turned dragon and intervened. The Dastard hadn't liked it, but she was acting to protect his interest as well as the princess, because she herself had once been Possessed by the Hag and knew that the woman was absolutely ruthless and not to be trusted. She would ruin the Dastard and throw him away as readily as she would the body of the princess, when it suited her purpose. So they needed to be kept apart if it was at all possible. But Becka wasn't sure how long she could keep this up, particularly now that it had gotten really confusing.

Princess Melody had talked the Dastard into taking a walk. Becka had followed, not interfering as long as nothing bad was happening. But then it had turned weird. A voice from nowhere has said “Sister, come with us,” and the princess had risen into the air and disappeared. Then reappeared. The Dastard had been suspicious, but the princess had kissed him and said it would be all right. And so it seemed to be. Had he done a partial unhappening, only enough to prevent the princess from flying away? She wanted to ask him, but didn't think she could while the princess was listening. She didn't know how far the Hag had caught on about the several unhappenings, and didn't want to tip her off if she didn't know.

The Dastard was acting as if nothing had happened, but Becka knew he had noticed too. He surely knew whether he had unhappened anything, and he was cautious when he didn't understand something. He was not a stupid or rash man. So if this was not of his doing, then he was playing along until he knew exactly what had happened.

But there was something else odd about this. The princess was walking and talking, but she didn't seem quite the same. She had little mannerisms, and while her present ones were similar, they weren't identical. It was almost as if--

“This isn't the same princess!” Becka said. “I think it's one of her sisters.”

Suddenly the Dastard stopped walking. “Bring back the Sea Hag,” he said.

The princess stopped too. “Oh, you caught on,” she said. “I'm Harmony, Melody's sister.” A little harmonica appeared, and she played it briefly. Her hair changed color, becoming brown. So did her dress and eyes. Then the harmonica faded out. It was magic that would have seemed formidable, with anybody except a Sorceress; for her it was obviously incidental.

“You changed places?” he asked. “Why?”

“So we could rescue Melody from the Sea Hag.”

“You can't. The Sea Hag will kill her before she lets her go.”

“We think we can do it.”

“Then I'll unhappen it.”

“But you mustn't!” Harmony said, alarmed. “Possession by the Sea Hag is the most horrible thing imaginable.”

“The Hag and I have a Deal. I won't let you break it up.”

“And I won't let you hurt my sister,” Harmony said.

“How are you going to stop me?”

The little harmonica reappeared in Princess Harmony's hand. She played a few notes. The Dastard froze in place.

After a moment, Harmony stopped playing. “That's how,” she said.

The Dastard recovered. “I didn't know you could do that. Princess Melody never did.”

“Melody was captive of the Sea Hag; she couldn't use her power. Otherwise you would never have gotten close to her.”

“I see,” the Dastard said thoughtfully. “You three are all Sorceresses.”

“We are,” she agreed.

“But my power will work on you. I could have unhappened your magic.”

“Why didn't you?”

“I think you already know.”

“Because if you unhappen me once, you won't be able to do it again for the same event.”

“That's right. If I unhappened just your music, I wouldn't be able to go back and unhappen your exchange with Melody.”

Harmony nodded. “I thought to trick you. You were too smart for me. But if you try to unhappen my exchange with Melody, I'll go back with you and block you.”

Becka was trying to stay out of this, but couldn't help herself. “You can do that? You can unhappen things too?”

“No, not alone,” Harmony said. “But I really am a Sorceress in my own right, and can block hostile magic when I have to.”

“I can go back to before your arrival here,” the Dastard said. “I can stop that exchange you made with your younger Selves.”

But the princess was unfazed. “Two things: first, I'll go back with you, and block you there too. Second, if you succeeded, then my sister Melody would not arrive either, and the Hag would not take her over. So you would have no deal with the Hag, and none of this would matter.”

The Dastard studied her appraisingly. “You're no dummy.”

“Neither are you. So I trust you'll know better than to start something you will regret.”

“I think you're bluffing. If you could go back and stop me, you would have done it already, and we would not be here discussing it.”

Still she showed no distress. “You have been unhappening events for four years. We have been here as adults only a few days. We're not used to Xanthly concepts of time and geography, but we're learning rapidly. So you have had the advantage of experience, but on the other hand we have the advantage of numbers. When the three of us act together, we can do anything anyone can do.”

“But one of you is captive of the Sea Hag.”

“I think two of us could handle you,” Harmony said evenly.

“Then why didn't you?”

Harmony smiled. “Now you are the one asking a question to which you know the answer.”

“Because eliminating me would not have saved your sister,” he said. “You have to deal with the Sea Hag first.”

“Yes. But if we can't save our sister, we can certainly make you regret it. I think you would prefer not to face us when we have nothing to lose.”

Becka whistled internally. The princess was handling the Dastard rather nicely. But the Sea Hag did have her sister, and that was a strong deterrent.

“What is it you want?” he asked.

“We want Melody free, and you to stop making mischief. What is it you want?”

“To marry an attractive princess and live in luxury the rest of my life.”

“That's a pretty selfish desire.”

The Dastard shrugged. “I have no soul. I can afford to be selfish.”

“There is something you perhaps don't realize. If you marry any human woman, including a princess, you will inherit half her soul, which will in time regenerate to a full soul. You will then be governed by it. That will be hard on your selfishness.”

The Dastard seemed taken aback. “Is this true?” he asked Becka.

“Yes, as far as I know,” Becka said, surprised to be asked. “At least, I've heard of it when demons marry humans.”

The Dastard considered a moment, then shrugged. “But in that event I would already have achieved my desire, so it wouldn't matter.”

“It would matter,” Harmony said. “You would have to act decently, if your soul was not corrupted. Your present way of life would be finished.”

Then the Dastard thought of another angle. “If I married the Sea Hag, in Possession of Melody's body, would I get half her soul?”

That evidently set the princess back. “I'm not sure. The Hag has hung on to her withered old soul for millennia. I doubt she would give any of it away. But you might still get half of Melody's soul.”

“And I might not,” he countered. “The fact is you don't know.”

“I don't know,” Harmony agreed. “And I will do everything I can to stop you from marrying the Sea Hag in my sister's body. So will our sister Rhythm.”

Becka realized that this was no bluff. Two Sorceresses working together could destroy one man, especially if they could follow him in time, as it seemed they could.

There was a sound. Suddenly two more princesses appeared beside Harmony. One wore green and one wore red, with matching hair colors.

The Dastard looked at them. “Is--?”

“Yes, I am free of the Sea Hag,” Melody replied.

“How--?”

“We locked her on the other side of the plugged monster,” Rhythm said.

The Dastard slid into limbo. He was making his move. The three princesses slid with him. They were countering it. Becka was carried along in the powerful swirl of magic.

They came to the time and place where the Sea Hag had been trapped. Becka saw Melody's body lie down, and a withered spirit leave it and flit toward the monster. This was how it happened.

The Dastard slid back farther, to the time just before the Hag brought Melody here. He slid into Xanth. He was going to try to warn the Sea Hag not to go behind the monster.

The three princesses slid out with him. Melody began to hum; Harmony played her harmonica; Rhythm produced a small drum and beat lightly on it. A field of power formed around the Dastard and started to make him fade out.

He slid back into limbo. The three princesses followed. Becka was again sucked along in the vortex. There was no question of the combined power of the princesses; Becka felt the surge of magic, stronger now, and knew that with each experience they were discovering how to tune their magic for greater effect. They were learning rapidly, and would soon overwhelm the Dastard. They had already stopped him from unhappening the unPossession, which had surely been the trickiest aspect of this contest.

He slid back to the time the princesses had exchanged with their younger Selves. The three went with him. This time he didn't even make it out of limbo; their magic bound him within it, rendering him helpless to interfere with their past.

The Dastard tried once more. He slid all the way back four years, evidently trying to get before the time the stork delivered the little princesses. Becka realized with horror that this ploy might work; obviously they could not go back to before the time they existed, any more than he could go back to before he got his talent.

But it turned out that they had been delivered just before he got his talent. He could not unhappen their very existence. Becka was relieved; she was supposed to help the Dastard, but her sympathy was with the princesses.

The Dastard snapped back to the present and returned to Xanth. The princesses returned with him, and so did Becka, carried along. She had never before experienced such strong magic; she felt its power like the strong current of a swollen river, carrying her along like a floating leaf. It was frightening and exhilarating at the same time; she was glad to be out of it for the moment.

“So you can balk me,” the Dastard said. “But for how long? The Sea Hag said you were here only four days. After that I will win.”

The princesses looked triply stricken. “He's right,” Melody said.

“We have very little time to settle this,” Harmony agreed.

“So we'll have to do it the mean way,” Rhythm concluded.

Becka didn't much like the sound of this. “The mean way?”

“We'll have to kill him,” Sim squawked. He had not accompanied them through limbo, but remained in the present scene, still invisible. Becka could see him because the princesses could, and their daunting magic encompassed her.

“I'll unhappen that!” the Dastard said.

“Not if we balk you,” Melody said.

“We'll chase you until we catch you,” Harmony said.

“And feed you to a dragon,” Rhythm finished.

“I'm not eating him!” Becka protested.

But the Dastard was plainly worried. “Maybe we should negotiate.”

“Why should we?” Melody asked. “You want to enslave me to the Sea Hag.”

“No, I want to marry you. Will you do it without being Possessed?”

Melody looked stricken. Harmony stepped in. “No, she won't. Anyway, she can't; she'll be returning to Ptero soon. So that's out.”

“The Sea Hag said there was a way,” he said.

“Her way is anathema,” Rhythm said. “Whatever it is.”

“You three could make it true your way, if you wanted to.”

“But we don't want to,” Melody said. “I don't want to be Possessed, or to marry you. I just want to stop you from doing dastardly deeds.”

But the Dastard had her number. “You don't want to kill me, either. You're bluffing.”

“But we could stop you some other way,” Harmony said.

“Really? How?”

“By giving you a soul,” Rhythm explained.

But the Dastard was ready for that too. “You used your spare soul for the plugged monster. Now you don't have one for me.”

The three princesses exchanged a triple glance. “He's right, you know,” Melody said.

“But souls are divisible,” Harmony said. “One of us could share half a soul with him.”

“By marrying me?” the Dastard asked.

The three quailed. Obviously that was not their plan.

Becka was impressed. The Dastard was proving to be smarter than the princesses.

Then Princess Melody tackled the matter. “You have a certain advantage because you have no conscience. You can do things we can't, because of our ethics. But I think we have more power than you, and if we have to make a choice between letting you tear up Xanth or stopping you permanently, we'll stop you. We have to make that decision in the next two days, before we return to Ptero. So if you have any suggestion that might enable us to stop you without killing you, we would like to hear it.”

And that, Becka realized, put it back on the Dastard. The three princesses did have more magic; she had felt its awesome power. But they also did have consciences, and that limited them substantially. Becka could feel the difference: When she was near the Dastard, there was a kind of emptiness, while near the princesses there was the goodness of their sweet souls. It remained a standoff.

“Yes, I have a compromise,” the Dastard said. “Marry me, Melody, share your soul with me, and we'll both have everything we want.”

“Some other compromise,” Harmony said.

“That's the only one I'm interested in.”

“And it's one we are not interested in,” Rhythm concluded.

There was a silence. Becka wanted to help the princesses, but was supposed to help the Dastard. She made an effort to do both. “Maybe--maybe if you gave it some time,” she said. “You're rejecting the Dastard without really knowing him. You ought to let him make his case, seeing as it is a viable compromise.”

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