The Dark-Hunters (836 page)

7. Never touch your Squire.
Squires. They may be hard to live with, but it’s pretty damn hard to live without them. You rely on them to protect you while you rest and to pull your butt out of harm’s way in a pinch (and in the daylight). Do yourself a huge favor and don’t go falling in love with yours. Your Squire will do anything for you. If you care about yours, do this for them.

The Squire Council tries to avoid pairing up Squires and Dark-Hunters of the opposite sex (or the opposite desired partner, in case that happens to be the same sex), but it happens from time to time. People in the workplace and all that. Just
don’t.
Affairs of the heart inevitably lead to the death of either the Hunter or the Squire. No entanglements.

8. No family, no friends who knew you before you died.
You are
dead.
Never forget it. It’s cruel to both the Hunter and the family to know what you have become. You have loved, and now you must let go. It puts your family in jeopardy, making them prime targets for Daimon attacks. For everyone’s sake, never return to your origins, your descendents, or contact any family or friends who may still live to recognize you.

9. Let no Daimon escape alive.
You were created to kill them. (If for some reason you don’t, when Ash comes around you gonna have some ’splainin’ to do, Lucy.) Never toy with your prey. The longer they live, the greater the chance the souls they carry will die. Kill the Daimons; save the humans. Let me repeat that: Kill the Daimons; save the humans. Humans and Apollites, while they have their failings, are what you were sent here to protect. Once an Apollite turns Daimon, though, it’s fair game.

Daimons by nature are cowards. They talk big, and their bark is worse than their bite, literally. The courageous ones are Spathi Daimons. These are their warrior class who do hunt and pursue Dark-Hunters. Don’t get cocky. Learn the difference. The Spathi have sun tattoos. They swear allegiance to Apollymi. They will face you and fight to the death, and they are very good at what they do—expect it.

10. Never speak of what you are.
Sometimes it is best for legends to stay legends. All Dark-Hunters are forbidden to have their likeness captured, in any medium. The last thing you need is a bunch of renegade teenage paparazzi hunting you down like Doctor Who. The only time you can break this rule is in the event of dire circumstances. Humans
must not know
you exist. Film provides lasting proof that you don’t age and it makes it easy for humans to recognize you. Those two things are bad.
Very
bad.

11. You cannot be in the presence of another Dark-Hunter.
Just in case one of you was harboring any ill will, to prevent Dark-Hunters from combining their powers they are forbidden from ever being in each other’s company. To do so is to feel an instant drain on your powers. A few minutes’ company with your comrades-in-arms is fine, but any lengthy stay and you will deplete each other.

This also prevents the Dark-Hunters from banding together and going up against the gods … a nice touch on Artemis’s part. Acheron is the only Dark-Hunter you will be able to walk beside for an extended period of time without passing out, but Acheron was the first. He’s … different.

12. Whatever you do to another Dark-Hunter, you will feel tenfold.
To help maintain the above rule, Artemis added a bonus. If you do attempt to physically harm another Dark-Hunter, the pain you inflict upon your victim you will feel tenfold. (And here you thought paganism with its threefold rule was tough.) Don’t worry, you will stop long before he’s even close to dead; it will be physically impossible for you to continue. That much pain is just not worth it. Think twice before striking.

13. You walk alone.
You are the boogeyman. You are the scary thing that goes bump in the night. The main directive of the Dark-Hunter code is to be alone. You cannot team up, even to help each other. It sucks, but that’s the way it is. The only friend you’re allowed is your Squire. Take care of them. (But don’t—you know—take
care
of them.)

What to Do if Your Picture Is Snapped

• Try to get it back. (You catch more flies with honey …)

• Break the camera. (Last resort, please. Respect other people’s property.)

• Destroy the pictures
and
negatives. (Don’t forget the negatives.)

• Carry a big magnet. (Digital cameras
love
magnets.)

• If an old photo appears out of the blue, try to convince everyone that you look just like your great-great-great-great-grandparent.

Always be aware of:

Tiny digital cameras

Camera phones

ATMs

PDAs

Police cameras

CCTV

Web cams

(Send your Squire into Best Buy.)

14. Keep your bow mark hidden.
Never let anyone see your double bow-and-arrow mark. You are known for that, and by letting it be seen you can be exposed to humans … or Daimons. The bow mark should be guarded and protected at all times.

What to Do If Your Tattoo Is Not in a Place That’s Easy to Hide

Women

Makeup

Arm-length gloves

Thigh-high corset boots

Catsuits

Plate necklaces and chokers

Men

Makeup (if you’re brave enough)

Leather bands

Vambraces

Spiked collars

Bandannas

Face masks (Although I wouldn’t suggest entering a convenience store if you opt for this one.)

Wages

I’m not paid to be fair. I’m paid to kick Daimon ass.

—Acheron

Yes, this is a job, and yes, you do get paid. There are no raises, no benefits—other than, you know, massive strength and immortality—and no 401(k) plan. If you want to set it aside for retirement or spend it as soon as it lands on your dining-room table, it’s up to you. More than likely, you will have sufficient funds to do both, with a bit left over after to buy a small country.

Speaking of which … Artemis does have a tendency to drop your pay packet in on you when—and where—you least expect it. She hasn’t quite gotten the whole “direct deposit” idea down just yet. She’s more of a “trunk full of jewels and precious stones on the hood of your Maserati” kind of gal. If you do have some precious furniture in your house, you might want to make some sort of arrangement with her beforehand. But always be prepared to kiss it good-bye.

Choosing Your Home

I’m the one, as I recall, who kept telling you to embrace the ridiculous.

—Leo Kirby

I know, it’s an odd subject to put before weapons, but consider: A Dark-Hunter’s home is his castle. It is your safe haven, your base of operations, your first line of defense, your port in a storm … you with me?

Before purchasing property with all that loot Artemis dumps on you every so often, you (or your Squire) need to do some thorough research. There are two main reasons:

Soul-searching
In case you haven’t figured it out already, Dark-Hunters don’t fare well around holy places. Back in the old days of Dark-Hunters living in crypts, those were usually built on unconsecrated ground, and were each a significant distance from any other grave.

Think about it this way: Disembodied souls and spirits are always eager to take up residence in a nice, healthy, immortal body with no soul, such as yourself. So while you can enter a church—even bless yourself with holy water if you’re into that kind of thing—don’t spend a whole lot of time there. You are beachfront property for the dearly departed, baby, and there’s no such thing as time-share.

Tips for Buying a Home

• Always check the trees. If the trees around a house are humongous, it’s got a history. Find out what it is.

• Buy new, or build your own. If your house has only ever belonged to you, it’s an invitation virgin.

• Investigate the plot of land and surrounding areas. Even small family plots can be a very large thorn in your side.

• Invite a psychic to tea. Extra cleansing never hurt anyone. Better safe than really, really sorry.

• Basements are your friends. If your dwelling is mostly underground, no one will wonder why your bedroom has no windows.

• Have a readily accessible garage, shaded porch, or foyer. Don’t be known as the Dark-Hunter who got fricasseed while fumbling for his keys.

If you do become possessed by a soul, one of two things will happen. If the soul is a strong one, it will take over your body. That’s it. End of story. End of you. You may have heard stories of the Dark-Hunter Ulric? Maybe not. In a nutshell, his body was taken over by the disembodied soul of the Spathi Daimon Desiderius. That one killed a lot of people, a lot of Dark-Hunters. We don’t talk about it much. It’s still too painful.

If the soul is a weak one, may the god of your choice have mercy on you. You will hear this weak soul within you—tortured and screaming, begging and whimpering like a whipped dog. It is enough to drive you mad, and it will. The only choice you have at that point is to kill yourself and set the soul free—if you condemn the soul to wither and die within you, you break the Code, and are no better than a Daimon. So make sure when you buy a house that you are the only preternatural critter calling it home.

Open invitation
If the home you decide to occupy has ever in its existence been a bed-and-breakfast, hospital, restaurant, community center—any gathering place of some sort—any Daimon can enter without an invite.

So, what have we learned, boys and girls? Always do a thorough property search. Buy a new house, or have one declared ghost-free by a licensed psychic.

One more side note if you’re stationed in the United States: Always be on the lookout for undisclosed Native American burial grounds. You don’t want those puppies sneaking up on you, no sirree. Think
Poltergeist
without the happy ending.

Weapons

If something as pathetic as a Greek Fury can take me down in a fight, I deserve to die.

—Sin

Here we come to the obligatory weapons section. I know, I know … most of this stuff you probably already know. You’ve got a favorite; we’ve all got favorites. But indulge me on this one.

There are certain things you might not think about, certain cultures you haven’t explored yet. Well, now’s the time. Experiment. Have some fun. Learn something new. Who knows, you might like it.

At the end of the day, use whatever you want as long as it gets the job done. But you’re not allowed to say you don’t like something until you’ve tried it at least once.

And if you do find something, can I tell you I told you so?

Feel free to use this list as the first errand you have your Squire run for you. Yes, you’re immortal and in peak condition, but a well-honed blade always cuts quicker and deeper. Don’t waste your time by being sloppy.

A lazy Dark-Hunter is a dead Dark-Hunter.

No, it’s not a saying, but it probably should be.

Most of these things can be procured, modified, or customized by Kell or Liza. They’d be happy to take your order … just don’t be impatient. Remember that you’re not the only Dark-Hunter in need of a weapon. Have a care and use some tact. You catch more flies with honey. And chocolate.

Also, don’t forget handy-dandy old eBay. Sure, you may have buckets of cash lying around, but a bargain is still a bargain. And you never know what you’re going to come across. Be inventive!

Athame
    Ritual ceremonial dagger, usually with a short handle and double-edged iron blade.

Atlantean Dagger
    Dagger with a wavy, etching-covered blade from hilt to point. Only known weapon able to kill a Charonte demon. The last known Atlantean dagger was destroyed by Ash, so if you find one, you might not want to tell him.

Bo
    Japanese staff weapon that originated as a means for carrying sacks of grain or buckets of water from the shoulders. Normally about six feet in length, a bo can be fashioned from a variety of materials.

Body Bag
    Useful in case you’re ever stuck in sunlight with no place to go. Made of nonporous black or white plastic, they are available in a variety of densities. Get the thickest possible, and make sure it’s new or you get the whole spirit-possessing-you mess.

Boot-Sheath Stiletto
    Pretty much a necessity. A thin blade designed for stabbing rather than cutting, a stiletto can be made as short as three inches. This weapon became popular during the Middle Ages and Renaissance for its ability to pass through chain mail.