The Cornerstone (25 page)

Will:
The deep dicking drawer.

Will:
If I didn’t have a handle on my masculinity, that drawer would have given me something to think about

Shannon:
You’re not making a lot of sense

Will:
Yeah I’ve been awake for the past 4 days but I keep wondering which one of those toys you use when you’re thinking about me

Shannon:
What gives you the impression I’m thinking about you

Will:
You were thinking about me in the shower

Will:
And I think about you

Shannon:
….using the deep dicking toys?

Will:
No. In my head you just use your fingers

Will:
But I have thought about teasing you with them. Seeing how crazy I can get you

Shannon:
Aren’t you supposed to be thinking about commando shit? I’m uncomfortable with the idea of you jumping out of airplanes or crawling through mud on your belly while thinking about vibrators.

Will:
Whoa. Hold on. Let me write this down. I want to remember the day and time you backhandedly admitted caring about me.

Shannon:
I was more concerned with national security and all. I don’t want you invading the wrong country or taking out the wrong dictator or whatever

Will:
That’s sweet but the jumping out of aircraft is a small portion of my day. There’s a lot of down time where I can contemplate vibrators relative to your pussy.

Shannon:
I do care about you. Don’t say I don’t. That’s rude.

Will:
Yeah whatever. You care about my cock

Shannon:
I won’t disagree with that statement but I would add that I enjoy other parts of you as well

*

Shannon:
I might need you to help me hide a body

Will:
I’m your guy

Shannon:
You’re my guy

Will:
I appreciate that you’ve finally confirmed it.

Shannon:
Maybe a few bodies

Will:
What kind of damage are we talking? Frat party gone wrong or mass grave? I can handle either one but I’d want an extra pair of hands for the sake of efficiency if we’re in mass grave territory

Will:
And I don’t usually ask this but humor me here…who are we burying?

Shannon:
Sam clearly has a death wish today

Shannon:
And another one of Patrick’s assistants quit

Shannon:
She decided she wanted to Occupy Wall Street or join Greenpeace. She said working for us was robbing her soul of its generosity and she needed purpose in her life.

Shannon:
We save old homes, for fuck’s sake! We’re actively preventing history from being demolished!

Shannon:
And for once, it wasn’t Patrick’s fault but fuck…there are times when I’m 93% sure I’m employing children. Actual children.

Will:
Don’t get me started.

Shannon:
You can make them run and jump and climb things. I can’t ask an intern to put paper in the copier without a story about her life’s path and my contribution to deforestation

Will:
Run and jump and climb? Are you confusing the special ops with playgrounds?

Shannon:
Yes, William. Yes, I am.

*

Shannon:
Do you wear a thigh holster?

Will:
Mmm?

Shannon:
You know. On your missions.

Will:
Yeah.

Will:
Why?

Shannon:
I have my reasons

Will:
Wait. That’s the weirdest thing you’ve ever asked and we’ve had some strange convos

Shannon:
Unlikely

Shannon:
I was just wondering

Will:
Why don’t I believe that?

Shannon:
They’re kind of hot, all right?

Will:
Wait a minute.

Will:
Wait

Will:
Were you watching SEAL porn?

Shannon:
This conversation is over

Will:
omg you were!

Will:
I’ve turned you into a tag chaser. I want to hear all about it.

Shannon:
Can you go squeal somewhere else?

Will:
Hold on. You were watching porn and you didn’t call me? How many movies have we watched over the phone together? At least 10

Will:
You can call me when that Eurotrip movie is on but you can’t call me for PORN?

Will:
I expect a call when porn is involved

Shannon:
Sigh.

Shannon:
I never said I was watching porn

Will:
And you haven’t denied it either.

Will:
You want me to bring my gear the next time I see you? Give you the real thigh holster experience?

Will:
What does it for you, peanut? Some enhanced interrogation? Camo? Underwater knot tying?

Will:
You want to watch while I do push-ups?

Shannon:
Oh my jesus

Shannon:
Can we please not talk about this anymore. Or ever again.

Will:
Sure. Agree to one thing.

Shannon:
Ugh what

Will:
You’re not allowed to watch porn without me. Got it?

Shannon:
Yes sir.

Will:
Ohhhh that was nice.

*

Shannon:
Hey. Are you awake?

Will:
Yes

Shannon:
I can’t sleep. Tell me something interesting.

Will:
One of my guys thinks he’s coined a new sex term for visiting each port

Shannon:
Right there. That one. That was pretty special.

Will:
He calls it “getting in 3 holes of golf”

Shannon:
Gross

Shannon:
Amusing, and something Riley would totally say, but gross

Shannon:
He’d probably aspire to that as well

Will:
I like how you automatically understood that one.

Shannon:
I have 4 brothers. My office is like a locker room

Shannon:
Tell me something else

Will:
I want to roll over at 2 in the morning and find you, not a text message

Will:
I love talking to you but I hate this

Will:
Too real?

Shannon:
No.

Shannon:
I know exactly what you mean.

*

Will:
I’m going down range for a bit

Shannon:
Should I understand that comment?

Will:
It means I’ll be off the grid.

Shannon:
With the baby seals?

Will:
No. I have to jump on a mission.

Shannon:
A real one? Not training?

Will:
Real

Shannon:
Oh. Ok.

Shannon:
Don’t take out the wrong dictator

Will:
I’ll try.

Will:
Be good while I’m gone, peanut.

Shannon:
I’ll try.

Shannon:
Just be careful, ok?

Will:
I will.

*

Will:
You up

Will:
Fuck this has been a long week

Will:
I want to talk to you

Will:
I miss you

Shannon:
How can you miss me? You haven’t spent enough time with me to miss me