The Complete Works of William Shakespeare In Plain and Simple English (Translated) (13 page)

CONSTANCE.

O be remov'd from him, and answer well!

Oh, step away from him, and answer well!

AUSTRIA.

Do so, King Philip; hang no more in doubt.

Do so, King Philip; don't stand there doubting.

BASTARD.

Hang nothing but a calf's-skin, most sweet lout.

Dressed in nothing but a calfskin, you sweet lout.

KING PHILIP.

I am perplex'd and know not what to say.

I am confused and don't know what to say.

PANDULPH.

What canst thou say but will perplex thee more,

If thou stand excommunicate and curs'd?

What if what you say makes you more confused

by making you excommunicated and cursed?

KING PHILIP.

Good reverend father, make my person yours,

And tell me how you would bestow yourself.

This royal hand and mine are newly knit,

And the conjunction of our inward souls

Married in league, coupled and link'd together

With all religious strength of sacred vows;

The latest breath that gave the sound of words

Was deep-sworn faith, peace, amity, true love,

Between our kingdoms and our royal selves;

And even before this truce, but new before,

No longer than we well could wash our hands,

To clap this royal bargain up of peace,

Heaven knows, they were besmear'd and overstain'd

With slaughter's pencil, where revenge did paint

The fearful difference of incensed kings.

And shall these hands, so lately purg'd of blood,

So newly join'd in love, so strong in both,

Unyoke this seizure and this kind regreet?

Play fast and loose with faith? so jest with heaven,

Make such unconstant children of ourselves,

As now again to snatch our palm from palm,

Unswear faith sworn, and on the marriage-bed

Of smiling peace to march a bloody host,

And make a riot on the gentle brow

Of true sincerity? O, holy sir,

My reverend father, let it not be so!

Out of your grace, devise, ordain, impose,

Some gentle order; and then we shall be blest

To do your pleasure, and continue friends.

Good reverend father, put yourself in my position,

and tell me how you would behave.

I have only just joined hands with this King,

and our souls have been joined together,

sworn to work for each other

with all the religious strength of sacred vows;

the last thingthat I have said

was to swear faithfully to peace, friendship and true love

between our kingdoms and ourselves.

And just before this truce, just recently,

no sooner than we could wash our hands

to seal this royal bargain of peace,

heaven knows, they were smeared and stained

with the blood of slaughter, revenge showing

how terrible disagreement is between angry kings:

should these hands, so recently cleansed of blood,

so newly joined in friendship, both so faithful
,

undo their clasp and their kind bond?

Cheat with faith? Should we joke with heaven,

be such unfaithful children of God

that we would now take our hands apart,

unswear what we have sworn, and on the marriage bed

of sweet peace march a bloody army,

and cause a riot on the gentle forehead

of true sincerity? Oh, holy Sir,

my reverend father, don't make me do this!

From your grace invent, decree, impose

some less strict order, and then we will have the blessing

of doing as you wish and remaining friends.

PANDULPH.

All form is formless, order orderless,

Save what is opposite to England's love.

Therefore, to arms! be champion of our church,

Or let the church, our mother, breathe her curse-

A mother's curse-on her revolting son.

France, thou mayst hold a serpent by the tongue,

A chafed lion by the mortal paw,

A fasting tiger safer by the tooth,

Than keep in peace that hand which thou dost hold.

All ceremony is powerless, there is no order

except in being the opposite of friends with England.

So, to battle! Be the champion of our church,

or let the church, our mother, say her curse–

a mother's curse–against her revolting son.

France, you would be safer holding a snake by the tongue,

an angry lion by his killing paw,

a hungry tiger by his tooth,

than to remain at peace with that hand which you are holding.

KING PHILIP.

I may disjoin my hand, but not my faith.

I can break my grip, but not my promise.

PANDULPH.

So mak'st thou faith an enemy to faith;

And like. a civil war set'st oath to oath.

Thy tongue against thy tongue. O, let thy vow

First made to heaven, first be to heaven perform'd,

That is, to be the champion of our Church.

What since thou swor'st is sworn against thyself

And may not be performed by thyself,

For that which thou hast sworn to do amiss

Is not amiss when it is truly done;

And being not done, where doing tends to ill,

The truth is then most done not doing it;

The better act of purposes mistook

Is to mistake again; though indirect,

Yet indirection thereby grows direct,

And falsehood cures, as fire cools fire

Within the scorched veins of one new-burn'd.

It is religion that doth make vows kept;

But thou hast sworn against religion

By what thou swear'st against the thing thou swear'st,

And mak'st an oath the surety for thy truth

Against an oath; the truth thou art unsure

To swear swears only not to be forsworn;

Else what a mockery should it be to swear!

But thou dost swear only to be forsworn;

And most forsworn to keep what thou dost swear.

Therefore thy later vows against thy first

Is in thyself rebellion to thyself;

And better conquest never canst thou make

Than arm thy constant and thy nobler parts

Against these giddy loose suggestions;

Upon which better part our pray'rs come in,

If thou vouchsafe them. But if not, then know

The peril of our curses fight on thee

So heavy as thou shalt not shake them off,

But in despair die under the black weight.

So you are making your promise an enemy of your promise,

setting oaths against oaths like a civil war,

setting your words against your words. Oh, let your promise

which you first made to heaven, be carried out on heaven's behalf,

that is, that you would be a champion of our church.

Since what you have sworn is swearing against yourself

and cannot be done by you,

for if you break your oath you are not breaking it

if you are doing so to keep your true oath,

and not doing something when doing it would be evil

then you are being most faithful by not doing it:

the best thing to do when you're in the wrong

is to do a wrong to right it; although doing wrong

you will be doing right by doing wrong,

and falsehood will cure falsehood, as fire cools fire

in the scorched brains of someone who's just been burned.

It is your religion which makes you want to keep your vows,

but you have sworn against religion:

you are swearing against the thing you have sworn,

you are swearing against your own truth!

Having sworn an oath you have the effrontery

to say that your oath is the guarantee of your truthfulness!

This makes a mockery of swearing, doesn't it?

But you have sworn only that you won't break your oath,

and your oath says that you must keep to what you have sworn.

So your later promise goes against your first

and so you are fighting against yourself;

you can never win a greater victory

than if you make sure your true and noble qualities

resist the temptation of foolish suggestions:

then the prayers of your better part will be answered,

if you make them. But if you don't, then you should note

that you will be so heavily cursed by us

that you will not be able to escape them,

and you will die in despair under their black weight.

AUSTRIA.

Rebellion, flat rebellion!

Rebellion, plain rebellion!

BASTARD.

Will't not be?

Will not a calf's-skin stop that mouth of thine?

Is everything in vain?

Wouldn't a calfskin block up your mouth?

LEWIS.

Father, to arms!

Father, we must fight!

BLANCH.

Upon thy wedding-day?

Against the blood that thou hast married?

What, shall our feast be kept with slaughtered men?

Shall braying trumpets and loud churlish drums,

Clamours of hell, be measures to our pomp?

O husband, hear me! ay, alack, how new

Is 'husband' in my mouth! even for that name,

Which till this time my tongue did ne'er pronounce,

Upon my knee I beg, go not to arms

Against mine uncle.

On your wedding day?

Against the family you have married into?

What, shall we celebrate with men's deaths?

Shall our wedding music be braying trumpets

and loud spiteful drums, the racket of hell?

Oh husband, listen to me! Alas, how new that word

“husband” is to me! Just because of that name,

which I have not ever said until now,

I go down on my knees and beg you not to fight

against my uncle.

CONSTANCE.

O, upon my knee,

Made hard with kneeling, I do pray to thee,

Thou virtuous Dauphin, alter not the doom

Forethought by heaven!

Oh, on my knees,

which are worn out with begging, I pray you,

you good Dauphin, do not go against

the wishes of heaven!

BLANCH.

Now shall I see thy love. What motive may

Be stronger with thee than the name of wife?

Now I will see what your love is worth. What is

more important to you than what your wife asks?

CONSTANCE.

That which upholdeth him that thee upholds,

His honour. O, thine honour, Lewis, thine honour!

The thing which supports the man who supports you,

his honour. Oh, your honour, Louis, your honour!

LEWIS.

I muse your Majesty doth seem so cold,

When such profound respects do pull you on.

I'm surprised that your Majesty seems so cold,

when such deep considerations should be working on you.