The Complete Works of William Shakespeare In Plain and Simple English (Translated) (1021 page)

(Throws herself on the bed.)

Scene IV:  Hall in Capulet’s house.

(Enter Lady Capulet and Nurse.)

Lady Capulet

Nurse, hold these keys and go get more spices.

Hold, take these keys and fetch more spices, nurse.

Nurse

The recipe calls for dates and quinces.

They call for dates and quinces in the pastry.

(Enter Capulet.)

Capulet

Hurry, hurry!  It’s three o’clock already.  Get the meats ready, Angelica.  Don’t worry about the costs.

Come, stir, stir, stir! The second cock hath crow'd, The curfew bell hath rung, 'tis three o'clock:-- Look to the bak'd meats, good Angelica; Spare not for cost.

Nurse

Go to bed, you old housewife.  You’ll be sick tomorrow, if you stay up all night.

Go, you cot-quean, go, Get you to bed; faith, you'll be sick to-morrow For this night's watching.

Capulet

Nonsense!  I have stayed up all night before for much lesser reasons and not been sick.

No, not a whit: what! I have watch'd ere now All night for lesser cause, and ne'er been sick.

Lady Capulet

Yes, you used to chase the ladies once upon a time, but I’ll make sure you don’t anymore.

Ay, you have been a mouse-hunt in your time; But I will watch you from such watching now.

(Exit Lady Capulet and Nurse.)

Capulet

Jealous, jealous woman.  Now, fellow…

A jealous-hood, a jealous-hood!--Now, fellow,

(Enter Servants, with spits, logs and baskets.)

…what do you have there?

What's there?

First Servant

Stuff for the cook, sir.  I’m not sure what it is.

Things for the cook, sir; but I know not what.

Capulet

Well, hurry up.

Make haste, make haste.

(Exit first Servant.)

Sir, go get drier logs.  Peter can tell you where they are.

Sirrah, fetch drier logs: Call Peter, he will show thee where they are.

Second Servant

I’m not dense, sir.  I can find the logs without Peter’s help.

I have a head, sir, that will find out logs And never trouble Peter for the matter.

(Exit second Servant.)

Capulet

Right, good fellow.  He’s funny.  Oh my, it is already daylight.  Paris will be here with the music soon.  I think I hear him coming.  (Music plays within.)  Nurse!  Wife!  Nurse!

Mass, and well said; a merry whoreson, ha! Thou shalt be logger-head.--Good faith, 'tis day. The county will be here with music straight, For so he said he would:--I hear him near. [Music within.] Nurse!--wife!--what, ho!--what, nurse, I say!

(Enter Nurse.)

Go wake Juliet.  Get her ready.  I’ll go and chat with Paris.  Hurry up!  The groom is here already.  Hurry up, I say.

Go, waken Juliet; go and trim her up; I'll go and chat with Paris:--hie, make haste, Make haste; the bridegroom he is come already: Make haste, I say.

(Exit all.)

Scene V:  Juliet’s bedroom with Juliet lying on the bed.

(Enter Nurse.)

Nurse

Miss!  Miss!  Juliet!  Hurry, you sleepyhead!  Your love has arrived.  Wake up, bride!  What not a word?  Do you want to sleep because you know with Paris, you will not get much sleep?  God forgive me!  She is sound asleep and I hate to wake her, but I must.  Madam, madam!  The Count will wake you up soon enough.  Are you dressed already and asleep again?  You must wake up, lady!  Oh, no!  My lady is dead!  Help!  Oh, curse the day I was born!  Someone get me a drink!  My lord!  My lady!

Mistress!--what, mistress!--Juliet!--fast, I warrant her, she:-- Why, lamb!--why, lady!--fie, you slug-abed!-- Why, love, I say!--madam! sweetheart!--why, bride!-- What, not a word?--you take your pennyworths now; Sleep for a week; for the next night, I warrant, The County Paris hath set up his rest That you shall rest but little.--God forgive me! Marry, and amen, how sound is she asleep! I needs must wake her.--Madam, madam, madam!-- Ay, let the county take you in your bed; He'll fright you up, i' faith.--Will it not be? What, dress'd! and in your clothes! and down again! I must needs wake you.--lady! lady! lady!-- Alas, alas!--Help, help! My lady's dead!-- O, well-a-day that ever I was born!-- Some aqua-vitae, ho!--my lord! my lady!

(Enter Lady Capulet.)

Lady Capulet

What is all the noise in here?

What noise is here?

Nurse

It is a sad day!

O lamentable day!

Lady Capulet

What is the matter?

What is the matter?

Nurse

Look, look!  Oh what a terrible day!

Look, look! O heavy day!

Lady Capulet

Oh me, oh me!  My child, my only child!  Wake her up or I will die right here!  Help, help!  Get some help!

O me, O me!--my child, my only life! Revive, look up, or I will die with thee!-- Help, help!--call help.

(Enter Capulet.)

Capulet

Be ashamed of yourself.  Hurry up and bring Juliet!

For shame, bring Juliet forth; her lord is come.

Nurse

She is dead.  Deceased.  Dead.  Curse the day!

She's dead, deceas'd, she's dead; alack the day!

Lady Capulet

Curse the day.  She is dead!  She is dead!

Alack the day, she's dead, she's dead, she's dead!

Capulet

Ha!  Let me see her.  She’s cold.  Her heart has stopped and her body is stiff.  She has been dead for some time now.  She is as dead as the sweetest flower in a field of frost.  Cursed time!  I am an unfortunate man!

Ha! let me see her:--out alas! she's cold; Her blood is settled, and her joints are stiff; Life and these lips have long been separated: Death lies on her like an untimely frost Upon the sweetest flower of all the field. Accursed time! unfortunate old man!

Nurse

Oh, what a sad day!

O lamentable day!

Lady Capulet

Oh, what a dreadful day!

O woful time!

Capulet

I am speechless.

Death, that hath ta'en her hence to make me wail, Ties up my tongue and will not let me speak.

(Enter Friar Lawrence and Paris, with Musicians.)

Friar Lawrence

Hey, is the bride ready to go to the church?

Come, is the bride ready to go to church?

Capulet

She is ready to go, but she will not be returning.  Oh my son, the night before your wedding day, your bride has died.  There she is.  Death, who stole her innocence, is my son-in-law now.  Death is my heir.  I believe I will die.  Death is all there is left.

Ready to go, but never to return:-- O son, the night before thy wedding day Hath death lain with thy bride:--there she lies, Flower as she was, deflowered by him. Death is my son-in-law, death is my heir; My daughter he hath wedded: I will die. And leave him all; life, living, all is death's.

Paris

I have waited so long for this day and this is what I get.

Have I thought long to see this morning's face, And doth it give me such a sight as this?

Lady Capulet

Curse this awful, dreadful day!  This is the most miserable hour time I ever saw.  My one and only child, the one thing I had to rejoice, and death has taken her from me.

Accurs'd, unhappy, wretched, hateful day! Most miserable hour that e'er time saw In lasting labour of his pilgrimage! But one, poor one, one poor and loving child, But one thing to rejoice and solace in, And cruel death hath catch'd it from my sight!

Nurse

Oh, terrible, terrible day!  The saddest day!  The most painful day, I have ever lived.  Oh, hateful day!  I have never seen a blacker day than this.  Oh, painful day!

O woe! O woeful, woeful, woeful day! Most lamentable day, most woeful day That ever, ever, I did yet behold! O day! O day! O day! O hateful day! Never was seen so black a day as this: O woeful day! O woeful day!

Paris

Tricked, divorced, wronged, spited, now dead!  Death has stolen my love.  Oh, love of my life!  My love is dead!

Beguil'd, divorced, wronged, spited, slain! Most detestable death, by thee beguil'd, By cruel cruel thee quite overthrown!-- O love! O life!--not life, but love in death!

Capulet

Despised, distressed, hated, martyred, killed!  What a terrible time!  Why now?  Why does my only child have to die?  My child!  Oh, child!  Take my soul and not my child’s. My child is dead and so is my joy.

Despis'd, distressed, hated, martyr'd, kill'd!-- Uncomfortable time, why cam'st thou now To murder, murder our solemnity?-- O child! O child!--my soul, and not my child!-- Dead art thou, dead!--alack, my child is dead; And with my child my joys are buried!

Friar Lawrence

Be at peace, now.  What a shame!  But, we can’t solve anything with all of this confusion.  She was a gift from heaven, and now to heaven, she has returned.  She is better off.  She has eternal life.  All you wanted was for her to be married.  That was your idea of heaven, but you cry because she has inherited the true heaven.  Your love for her makes you crazy.  It is better to die young.  Dry up your tears and bring your best rosemary to place on her corpse.  Take her to the church in her best clothes as the customs demand.  Although we are sad, we should be happy for her.

Peace, ho, for shame! confusion's cure lives not In these confusions. Heaven and yourself Had part in this fair maid; now heaven hath all, And all the better is it for the maid: Your part in her you could not keep from death; But heaven keeps his part in eternal life. The most you sought was her promotion; For 'twas your heaven she should be advanc'd: And weep ye now, seeing she is advanc'd Above the clouds, as high as heaven itself? O, in this love, you love your child so ill That you run mad, seeing that she is well: She's not well married that lives married long: But she's best married that dies married young. Dry up your tears, and stick your rosemary On this fair corse; and, as the custom is, In all her best array bear her to church; For though fond nature bids us all lament, Yet nature's tears are reason's merriment.

Capulet

Everything we prepared for the celebration is now for a funeral.  Change the happy music to sad, the wedding food to a burial feast, and the bridal flowers to a funeral spray.  Just reverse everything.

All things that we ordained festival Turn from their office to black funeral: Our instruments to melancholy bells; Our wedding cheer to a sad burial feast; Our solemn hymns to sullen dirges change; Our bridal flowers serve for a buried corse, And all things change them to the contrary.

Friar Lawrence

Go everyone.  Let’s get prepared for her funeral.  Let’s not stand in the way of God’s will.  

Sir, go you in,--and, madam, go with him;-- And go, Sir Paris;--every one prepare To follow this fair corse unto her grave: The heavens do lower upon you for some ill; Move them no more by crossing their high will.

(Exit Capulet, Lady Capulet, Paris, and Friar.)

First Musician

Well, we may put up our instruments and leave.

Faith, we may put up our pipes and be gone.

Nurse

Yes, good men.  Go ahead and pack up.  This is a pitiful day.

Honest good fellows, ah, put up, put up; For well you know this is a pitiful case.

(Exit Nurse.)

First Musician

I think things could get better.

Ay, by my troth, the case may be amended.

(Enter Peter.)

Peter

Musicians, play “Heart’s Ease.”  If you want me to live, play “Heart’s Ease.”

Musicians, O, musicians, 'Heart's ease,' 'Heart's ease': O, an you will have me live, play 'Heart's ease.'

First Musician

Why “Heart’s Ease?”

Why 'Heart's ease'?

Peter

Because, my heart is filled with sadness.  Oh, play me some comforting song.

O, musicians, because my heart itself plays 'My heart is full of woe': O, play me some merry dump to comfort me.

First Musician

This is not the right time to play music.

Not a dump we: 'tis no time to play now.

Peter

You will not play?

You will not then?