The Classy Crooks Club (30 page)

If this had happened a couple months ago, I would've laughed and screamed and made certain my parents saw that my perfect grandmother wasn't so perfect after all. But instead I point in the opposite direction and say, “You guys,
look
!”

Both my parents peer out the driver's-side window. “What?” my mom asks. “Where? I don't see anything.”

“There was this huge bird,” I say. “I swear it looked like a parrot or something.”

“It's possible,” my dad says. “Some people have no idea how to take care of their pets.”

“I can't believe I missed it,” my mom says.

“Really, honey? You didn't see enough parrots in the rain forest?”

By the time they stop looking for the mysterious bird, Grandma Jo and Edna and Cookie are far behind us, and I know my grandmother would approve of my exceedingly proper, discreet behavior.

For a second it's super weird, knowing Grandma Jo and I would see eye to eye on something. But when you look past the surface stuff—salad forks and skateboards and sewing and soccer—we actually have lots of things in common. We both work hard until we're the very best we can be. We're fiercely loyal to the people we love and try our best to guard their secrets. We're brave and resourceful, and we can think on our feet under pressure. We stand up for what we believe in, even when it's hard. And if we fail at something, we pick ourselves up, brush ourselves off, and try again.

I look out through the back window for one last glimpse of Grandma Jo in her orange vest. And I smile to myself as I realize that in my own way, I've become exactly what she hoped I'd be: the very definition of a respectable lady.

I'm incredibly grateful to the following people:

My editor, Amy Cloud: I'm so glad my geriatric thieves found a home with you. Thank you for sharing my bizarre sense of humor. Say the word and I'll kidnap Christopher Guest and hold him hostage until he makes a new movie just for you.

My superhero of an agent, Holly Root, who always encourages me when I send her e-mails that begin “So, this might be a really weird idea, but . . .” For you, I would gladly seal myself inside a wine cask, roll into Cakebread Cellars, and liberate a few cases of some fabulous vintage.

Everyone at Aladdin who worked so hard to make this book beautiful, especially my copy editor, Randie Lipkin. Better clear some room in your office for the antique printing press I'm planning to steal for you.

Angela Li, who drew me the most beautiful cover in the history of covers. I'll disable a museum security alarm and lift a painting for you any day.  Da Vinci? Degas? Let me know and I'm on it.

My ingenious early readers, who make me look far cleverer than I really am: Lindsay Ribar, Michelle Schusterman, Caroline Carlson, Claire Legrand, Jennifer Malone, Kristen Kittscher, and Nicole Lisa. I've liberated a parrot for each of you and am currently teaching them to sing your favorite songs. I hope none of you are allergic. (I'd better liberate some Claritin too, just in case…)

Kristin Bailey, my exotic bird expert, who was always on hand to answer questions like “Can macaws imitate the sound of a creaking door?” And Joel Kocevar, who taught me the essentials of lock picking. I'm unfamiliar with your tastes, but perhaps you'll accept a sack of liberated gold bars? Or maybe a sack of gift cards? That would be a lot easier to carry.

Erica Kemmerling, who makes it easy to write fabulous little sisters by providing such an excellent example. I'm planning to infiltrate the pygmy puff hatchery and liberate a whole kerfluffle of puffs for you. (Yes, that's totally the right collective noun. Just trust me.)

And my mom, Susan Cherry, who raised me to believe that creativity and humor are important virtues. Thanks for not caring if I turned out to be a proper lady. For you, I've liberated the deed to a small island where it's always eighty-five degrees and sunny. Pack your bags.

This book is a work of fiction. Any references to historical events, real people, or real places are used fictitiously. Other names, characters, places, and events are products of the author's imagination, and any resemblance to actual events or places or persons, living or dead, is entirely coincidental.

An imprint of Simon & Schuster Children's Publishing Division

1230 Avenue of the Americas, New York, New York 10020

www.SimonandSchuster.com

First Aladdin hardcover edition March 2016

Text copyright © 2016 by Alison Cherry

Jacket illustration copyright © 2016 by Angela Li

All rights reserved, including the right of reproduction in whole or in part in any form.

ALADDIN is a trademark of Simon & Schuster, Inc., and related logo is a registered trademark of Simon & Schuster, Inc.

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Jacket designed by Karin Paprocki

Interior designed by Hilary Zarycky

The text of this book was set in Bembo.

Library of Congress Cataloging-in-Publication Data

Cherry, Alison.

The classy crooks club / by Alison Cherry.—First Aladdin hardcover edition.

pages cm

Summary: “Twelve-year-old AJ is dreading spending the summer with her uber-strict grandmother—that is, until she's recruited to join Grandma Jo's madcap band of thieves”—Provided by publisher.

ISBN 978-1-4814-4637-2 (hc)—ISBN 978-1-4814-4639-6 (ebook)

[1. Grandmothers—Fiction. 2. Old age—Fiction 3. Robbers and outlaws—Fiction.] I. Title.

PZ7.C41987Cl 2016

[Fic]—dc23

2015029378