The Calling (18 page)

Her dull gaze cleared. “You thought I wouldn’t believe you?”

“You and Kirsten have been friends a long time. If you took her side, I would have been shit out of luck, and I couldn’t risk losing you.” Damn, he sounded like a self-centered bastard, but he’d already lost his best friend over the Kirsten fiasco, and he’d be damned if he endured more casualties because of that whore. “Do you have any idea how much you mean to me?” Justin slid to the floor, kneeled in front of her, and took her hands in his. He brought her soft palms to his cheeks and held them there. “Please say you forgive me for not telling you.”

She held his gaze, the hurt in her expression making every muscle in his body tense. Would ten dozen roses make her forgive him? Diamonds? A sailboat? Christ, he was in trouble, because she didn’t seem like the type who dug material stuff.
A poem!
If he wrote her a heartfelt little beauty, that’d win her back. Except, damn, he’d never written anything poetic in his life.

“I’m not mad at you,” she finally said.

“Thank God! I suck at writing!”

Her brow furrowed. “What?”

He leaned in and kissed the fragrant spot just beneath her ear. If he hadn’t been afraid of running her off, he would have told her he loved her right then and there.

Mandy moaned a feminine sound, but he could hear the tightness behind it so he pulled away.

“I would have believed you,” she said, the pain in her eyes never easing. “God, I’m not even surprised Kirsten screwed him. She’s such a slut.”

“Then, why are you friends with her?”

“Her hair’s not real.”

He tilted his head in what he was sure looked like a puppy waiting for the ball to be thrown. “Huh?”

“In middle school, after Kirsten’s dad left, she started yanking her hair out in her sleep. Even after therapy, she didn’t stop.”

“She wears a wig?”

“Weave.” She reached out and ran her fingers through his hair, her fingernails grazing his scalp. If the conversation hadn’t been so morbid, he would have purred from the gentle waves of pleasure her touch sent spiraling down his spine.

“Anyway,” she continued. “It was around that time when she started sleeping around, trying to find someone to love her. No matter how much I should hate her, I can’t. At least she never hit on Ty while we were together.”

“She’s not a good friend to you.”

“I know, but I can’t give up on her.”

If anyone understood that logic, it was him. “I know exactly what you mean.”

She seemed to ease at his acceptance of her and Kirsten’s friendship, her head tipping back slightly into the couch cushions. “If the worst she’s ever done to me is sleep with my lousy ex, I think I can get over that. Just promise me you won’t sex her up after you dump me.”

Justin leaned forward, revisiting the fragrant spot beneath ear, then he nibbled on her lobe. “I’d never dump you. Which means, if I haven’t already knocked you up”— which was fine by him—“we need to figure out what kind of birth control we're going to use.”

She giggled and wrapped her legs around his waist. “Do you think I would’ve let you come inside me if I didn’t have that covered?”

He leaned back, doing the waiting puppy dog look again.

“IUD,” she said.

He nodded, realizing it must have been leftover from her relationship with Ty. His stomach suddenly curdled as he imagined Ty’s hands all over her body. Thank God, her robe fell open at that precise moment, giving him a heavenly view of her perfect ‘v’. His body responded instantly, dying to get inside her again.

“Is it wrong for me to want you right after kicking Ty’s ass?”

“The way you handled him was a wee bit hot, actually.” Seeming embarrassed by her own words, she added, “But don’t do it again.”

He growled and pushed her deeper into the couch. “Not unless he asks for it.” Then he went to work claiming every inch of her body as his own.

Chapter 12

Mandy and Lori settled on the picnic table seat at the park next to the hospital. The sun shone bright, and a gentle wind rustled the oak tree leaves above their heads as they opened their McDonald’s salads.

“Kirsten’s not coming,” Lori said.

Mandy nodded, not at all surprised, even though Kirsten’s office building was only a block away, and she’d promised to have lunch with them. The day before, she’d sent Kirsten an email telling her she knew about Ty. She hadn’t been hostile toward her friend, but she hadn’t been particularly nice, either, just blunt, letting Kirsten know she wasn’t happy with the situation.

Mandy sucked in a deep breath, the sting of Kirsten’s betrayal bearing down on her acutely. “What’d she say to you?”

“The guilt’s been eating at her for the last six months, and she’s relieved you finally know.”

Mandy snorted. “Glad I could clear her conscience.”

Lori chomped down on a bite of salad and chewed slowly as she stared at Mandy, seeming to try and gauge Mandy’s anger over the circumstances. After she swallowed, she added, “She’s also terrified you’re going to disown her.”

“If Ty had cheated on me with her, I would. But since it happened after we broke up, I suppose I’ll get over it.”

“I still wouldn’t blame you if you ditched her.”

“I can’t.” They’d been friends for too long, and no one understood Kirsten the way Mandy did. Kirsten was lonely and lost and always looking for love in all the wrong ways.

Lori shrugged. “You’re a better friend than me.”

For a few minutes, they sat in amicable silence listening to the birds chirp overhead and the traffic zoom by on the busy road near the hospital. The energized vibe of the city mixed with the sounds of nature and the perfume of flowers made the park her favorite place to eat lunch. She tried to enjoy the warm breeze and marvel at the squirrel acrobatics going on around her, but her mind kept going back to Ty and Kirsten. When she couldn’t ignore the elephant in the park any longer, she asked, “How much did Kirsten tell you about her and Ty?”

“Does it matter?”

It shouldn’t have, but for some reason, she wanted the specifics, kind of like when a patient arrived on the floor beat up. Sure, it didn’t change the way the patient was cared for, but most nurses wanted to know how it happened anyway. “Yeah, it does matter.”

“Hit me with your questions,” Lori said.

“Did they have sex more than once?” she asked, surprised by how detached she felt from the whole thing. But the sex wasn’t what bothered her. It was the betrayal.

“Nope. Just the once, though they hung out a few times before officially hooking up.”

Mandy speared a cherry tomato. “Kirsten has to learn self-control. If she screws up again, I swear I’m done with her.”

“How long until you let her know she’s forgiven?”

“A few more days. She needs to sweat over her indiscretion.”

“Agreed.” Lori swiped away a fly from the edge of her bowl. “She did have some interesting tidbits about Ty.”

“Like?”

“He met Justin in the rescue swimmer program.”

“I thought they met at boot camp.”

“Nope. Turns out Ty’s a rescue swimmer flunky. He even went through the training twice and still couldn’t pass.”

Ty had never said a thing about wanting to be a rescue swimmer, but then he’d never said a thing about being on antidepressants either. “Only fifty percent of the candidates make it through.”

“You’re defending Ty?”

“No.” But that sure helped account for Ty’s jealousy of Justin. “Anything else?”

“He told Kirsten that Justin was gay, and that he’d even hit on him once.”

Mandy bit her bottom lip, holding in the laugh that wanted so badly to escape. Ty being a douchebag wasn’t funny at all, but since she had firsthand knowledge of just how straight Justin was, it all seemed hilarious to her. “I’d be happy to attest to Justin’s heterosexuality. God, I’m glad I didn’t marry Ty.”

“There’s only so long a person can keep their true colors hidden.”

“Kirsten included.” As she watched Lori hungrily plow through her salad, sadness weighed on her chest like a boulder. This was one of her last lunches with her best friend. How would she survive without her? “Do you have to go?”

Lori nodded, though the look on her face was one of sadness, too. “I’ve always wanted this. I think fate had a hand in my being chosen for the program.”

Mandy rolled her eyes. “Play the destiny card, why don’t you.”

“Can’t you be happy for me?”

“I am happy for you.” Mandy pouted. “I guess. If I have to be.”

“Gee, thanks.”

“I’m excited for you. I’m just afraid you’ll get seduced by Colorado and never come back.”

“I’m an ocean girl, not a mountain girl.”

“Keep it that way.”

“You know, you should start your blog. Then, I’d have an easier time keeping tabs on you.”

Mandy cringed. Since she’d come down with cancer, both her sister and Lori had been badgering her to start a blog that focused on her journey through the disease. They thought it’d let her connect with others in her situation and even give her the opportunity to help those in the midst of their diagnosis. To Mandy, it seemed like a constant reminder of something she’d rather forget. “No thanks.”

“If I start a blog about my time in Colorado, will you start yours?”

Mandy chortled. “Deal.” Lori was the biggest procrastinator on the planet, so that made the compromise as safe as betting on Kirsten wearing stripper heels to a club.

With a determined expression, Lori said, “Expect my first blog entry tonight.”

“You’re serious?”

“You betcha.”

“But you’re not even in Colorado yet!”

Lori smirked, her eyes glowing with victory. “I’ll blog about packing.”

Well, damn. It looked like Mandy was starting a blog this week.

* * *

Justin sat by his mom’s bed and stared at her frail fingers. Open, close. Open, close. She kept flexing her hand, and all he could think was that he should be holding her hand during a conversation like this, but he couldn’t remember the last time they’d touched.

“I’m too old for something that drastic,” his mom said, as she rested against a mountain of pillows.

“You won’t feel anything. The doctor will sedate you through the entire treatment.”

“What are the side effects?”

He’d practiced his speech so many times, he could recite the side effects without thinking. “Confusion afterward and sometimes memory loss, but that doesn’t usually last long.” He swallowed hard. “Some individuals with heart problems have died.”

A quick smile flicked across her face, then disappeared. “Too bad my ticker’s so strong.”

He had figured possible death wouldn’t be much of a deterrent, but hearing her put it into words still hurt. “If this works, Mom, you might be able to leave this place.”

She closed her eyes as if thinking. As her face slackened, a sort of peace came over her. “I’ll do it.”

The hope that filled his chest was too big for his ribcage, and he swore his bones ached under the pressure. If the therapy cured her, he’d have his real mother back. Though he knew it was dangerous to think so far ahead, he couldn’t help himself.

“When will my first treatment be?”

“As early as next week, Mom.”

“You’ll be there?”

“Of course.”

She relaxed into her bed, her eyes closing. “You’re a good son. You’d be a better one if you’d leave and let me get some rest.”

He stood, her words not dampening his optimism. It could be the beginning of a new life for her. “I’ll be back next week.” With an extra spring in his step, he left to set up her first shock treatment.

Chapter 13

Mandy hovered over a sizzling sauté pan of browning ground beef and onions. Her mouth watered as she inhaled the savory scents.

Justin pressed his stomach to her back, and his fingers tickled her waist as his arms encircled her. His fresh smell with a hint of spice made her hunger for much more than just pasta and, for an indulgent moment, she entertained thoughts of their bodies intertwined beneath white cotton sheets.

When he leaned down and nuzzled just behind her ear, she moaned contentedly, glad he couldn’t read her thoughts, or they’d be sprawled on the couch faster than she could say,
Dinner’s burning
.

“When’s it going to be ready?” he asked.

“Ten minutes,” she replied. “Unless I ruin it and have to start all over.”

His breath grazed the nape of her neck when he laughed. “Now, why would you ruin our dinner?”

“Because you’re distracting me.”

She felt his hard abs contract as he playfully nipped at her ear. Something down low tightened, making her body vibrate. Oh, God, how she wanted to forget about the food, but they’d have to wait until afterward to play. Besides, he’d been watching her with eager eyes all evening, and she had a feeling they’d need dinner to fuel the long night ahead.