The Bull Rider Meets His Match (13 page)

Her biggest fear in going to the rodeo was probably that of crying in front of the kids. Seeing an actual bull-riding event would remind her of the fact that her father would never set foot in an arena again. That was going to be tough to deal with—but not something she couldn't manage. She'd been fine.

* * *

P
ETE
'
S
GRANDMOTHER
CAME
with him to transport her beloved ducks to their new home, and the cute thing was that she seemed to be more excited by their new quarters than her own.

“You should see the yard,” Nancy said as she held Channing in her arms, stroking the top of his head. Lex wasn't certain if she was talking to her or the drake but took a chance and said, “I'm sure it's lovely.”

“You will come by and visit, won't you?”

“Most assuredly.”

“Maybe we could have a barbecue or something,” Peter said. “Invite your friends.”

“That would be lovely,” Nancy said with a broad smile. “You'll come, won't you, Alexa?”

“Certainly.” Although she was getting the feeling that Nancy had more in mind than a backyard barbecue for her and Pete. Pete also seemed to get his grandmother's meaning. He met Lex's gaze over Nancy's head and lifted his eyebrows in a way that clearly conveyed that he was humoring her.

“She's been trying to set me up with every single female in the vicinity,” Pete said as Lex helped him load the duck pen panels. “It's getting hard to take her to the grocery store because most of the checkers are single, and you should see what Lissa has to put up with.”

Lex bit her lip so that she didn't smile. “Probably wants great-grandchildren.”

“Do not think that subject hasn't arisen,” Pete muttered, hefting the empty pond in the back of the truck. They both turned toward Nancy, who stood several yards away, still holding Channing. She beamed at them, and they turned back to the truck at the same time.

“Yes. Good luck with that,” Lex murmured.

“If you do come to the barbecue, bring Grady. That'll get you out of the line of fire.”

“Uh...yeah. I'll do that.” Although she didn't know how long Grady would be in the area. He'd be leaving soon, but they hadn't spoken about when. Or his coming back. In fact, they hadn't spoken at all since he invited her to the rodeo, three nights ago. And she was good with that. Or so she told herself.

After Peter and Nancy drove away, Lex walked to where the pen had stood. Dave the Terror sniffed around the area while Lex gathered up the electric fencing that she and Grady had installed after the first time they made love.

She carried it to the storage shed, since the rabbits had already had their way with the garden during its absence, feeling sad as she dumped the stakes and strapping into a corner. It was a fine thing when an electric fence brought forth sentimental feelings.

Was she losing control here?

No. Because she didn't lose control. And what was with the sadness? She had nothing to feel sad about.

Except that she did miss Grady.

* * *

G
RADY
STAYED
AT
Hennessey's for longer than he'd intended, helping a couple of high school kids, and then he went out for a beer with the Hayward twins. It was dark by the time he headed for home, but he turned down Lex's road anyway. He needed to see her, and if her lights were on, he was stopping.

The only room lit when he drove into her driveway was her bedroom, and he told himself that counted, even though it was late. But another light came on as he neared her front walk where he usually parked, and she was on the porch by the time he got out of his truck.

She didn't say a word as he came up the steps. Instead she met him halfway across the porch, walked into his embrace, wrapping her arms around his waist and pressing her cheek against his as he held her tightly against him. Raising his head, he smoothed her hair back from her face with both hands, then kissed her deeply.

Lex melted into him and then it was a matter of getting into the house, up the stairs to her room, shedding clothing as they went. He felt as if he hadn't seen her in weeks, not days, and as they fell into her bed, he was rocked by how very much he needed her. It was about so much more than sex. It was about...Lex. The way she made him feel, the way she challenged him and supported him and...completed him.

Yeah. His life felt different and more complete.

“I missed you,” he said after they'd made love and were lying entwined on top of the quilts, because neither of them had had the patience to pull them off or fold them back. Four days without her had been four very long days. What was it going to be like when he was back on the road?

“I missed you, too,” she murmured against his chest as she traced her favorite scar near his shoulder—the one from the bull in Dallas that'd managed to hook his upper arm, completely ruining his favorite shirt and necessitating sixteen stitches. There was a note in her voice, something approaching wonder.

Grady closed his eyes, inhaled the fragrance of her hair, tried not to think about why missing him would be such a wondrous thing. Maybe, like him, she was getting to the point where it was hard to imagine life alone. Their relationship had snowballed faster than he had expected, faster than he really knew how to deal with. So what he was doing was taking one day at a time, one small moment at a time. One challenge at a time.

The Bozeman Rodeo was his next challenge.

Lex fell silent after saying that she missed him, and they lay together, idly caressing and thinking deep thoughts. But Lex didn't push him away or withdraw, so when he finally got up to head home, Grady felt everything was okay between them. He wasn't fool enough to think that going to the rodeo was going to be easy for Lex, regardless of what she said, and he was no longer fool enough to ask her about it. Sore subject. So they would simply deal with it together when the time came. No sense fighting the battle early and sparking a few more along the way.

* * *

L
EX
WALKED
G
RADY
to the door, kissed him good-night then leaned her head against the oak frame after closing the door. His boots echoed on her porch and then his truck started and still she stood, leaning her forehead against the aged wood.

She was scared and working so hard not to be.

She had missed him over the past four days. Missed him so much that when she'd heard his truck drive in, she practically raced down the stairs.

How was this a good thing? What was she setting herself up for?

Lex pushed off from the door and sat on her sofa, staring across the dimly lit room. She cared for Grady. If she didn't, she wouldn't be sleeping with him. But it was a temporary thing. They both knew that. He'd go back on the circuit. She'd stay here. Yes, he said he was wintering on his sister's property, but she'd believe that when she saw it. Oklahoma would call—better weather, more opportunities to practice.

A small part of her, though—the part that stirred up trouble and gave her anxiety attacks—whispered that if Grady said he was going to do something, he was going to do it. He wasn't leaving.

She pushed the thought down. Buried it as deeply as she could.

As much as she was enjoying their time together, it was transitory. It had to be. Grady was fun. He was a good friend. He was her lover for now. Not someone she'd lie awake nights worrying about because of what he did for a living.

Especially because of what he did for a living. She'd grown up in the business. How many bull riders did she know who'd had great careers and retired hale and hearty? Maybe a little creaky in the joints and scarred up, but alive and well? Lots. So it wasn't his career.

Much.

Those damned scars.

Lex got to her feet and stalked into the kitchen. She'd get a handle on this. Oh, yes, she would. And once he was on tour in the fall and not readily available, she'd develop a new perspective. One that wasn't colored by his proximity. A more realistic view of the situation.

And on that thought, Lex turned off the kitchen light and headed upstairs to the bed the man who was driving her crazy had so recently vacated. She pulled the quilts back and climbed under the sheet...then buried her head in the pillow and drew in Grady's scent.

Chapter Thirteen

The twins talked nonstop on the drive to the rodeo, and Lex was impressed by Grady's patience as he good-humoredly answered their many, many questions. She was feeling more positive about the trip, about Grady, about everything. After her late-night talk with herself, she'd fallen asleep and woken up feeling better. More centered. More in control. The feeling had continued for the entire day and when Grady had picked her up early this morning, she was certain that the anxiety she'd felt after he drove away two nights ago was caused solely by her repressed concern about watching a bull-riding event.

Which in turn convinced her that she needed to be more honest with herself.

After arriving, the twins wanted to do about fifty things—see the bucking horses, go to the carnival, eat everything that Annie had requested they not eat.

“Sometimes one must cave in the name of survival,” Grady said as he handed each girl a caramel apple.

“Agreed,” Lex said with a laugh.

Moments later they were helping the girls mop sticky goo off their chins and their new Western shirts.

“I think Annie knew what she was talking about,” Lex murmured.

“Uncle Grady! I lost a tooth!” Kristen pulled a tiny white nugget out of her apple and held it up.

“Cool.” He took the tooth, wrapped it in the tissue Lex automatically handed him and tucked it into his shirt pocket.

“Snap the flap,” Kristen directed, pushing her tongue through the space where her tooth had been.

“Will do.” He nodded at Katie. “Try to keep all your teeth, all right?”

Katie laughed and bit deeply into her apple, giving Lex the distinct impression that she was trying for all she was worth to lose one of her teeth.

“The line's getting long,” Lex said. “Let's grab some seats.”

They each took a twin by the hand and then, since they had nothing to do with their free hands, they joined them, walking to the ticket line with the bouncing girls. They were lucky enough to get seats under the awning so that they weren't baking in the sun and almost as soon as they were settled, the twins announced in unison that they had to use the bathroom.

“I'll take them,” Lex said. “If you don't mind saving the seats.”

Even though they protested, she talked the twins into taking off their pink cowboy hats and setting them on the seats they'd just vacated. “You do want to sit by Uncle Grady when we get back, right?”

“Yes,” Kristen agreed.

“But we won't sit right next to him,” Katie added. “'Cause that's where you're supposed to sit.”

“Right.” She'd tried to sit on the end, thus hemming the girls in, but they'd have none of that.

“Are you going to marry Uncle Grady?” Kristen piped up as Lex shrugged out of her jacket to leave it on her chair.

“I...uh...” She met Grady's gaze and found that she couldn't read his expression.

“That's not a question you ask people,” he said to Kristen.

“Why not?”

“Because,” he said with an easy smile, “that's something people tell you when they're ready and not before. So there's no sense asking early.”

“Oh.” Kristen gave a shrug. “Okay. But you'll tell us first?”

Grady smiled. “When we're ready.”

And Lex found she couldn't meet his eyes after that. She edged past him; then when she reached the stairs, she took a twin's hand in each of hers and headed for what would no doubt be a wait for the restroom. Plenty of time to think and possibly fend off curious questions. But while the twins had plenty of commentary, they took Grady's words to heart and didn't ask anything about her and their uncle.

When they made it back to their seats again and settled, Grady put his arm around Lex. The girls exchanged glances, hunching their shoulders and smiling as if they were party to a glorious secret.

Lex sighed, and Grady's arm tightened around her. She gave up and leaned in to him, telling herself that in the name of honesty, she needed to admit that she liked being held by him.

“Sorry about that,” he whispered into her ear, his breath fanning over her cheek. She nodded without looking at him. It was no big deal, after all. Of course the twins thought in terms of marriage. That was how all their fairy tales and movies ended. The guy and girl get married and live happily ever after. She only hoped they weren't too disappointed if it didn't work out that way. The little girls had kind of wormed their way into Lex's heart.

She relaxed once the rodeo started, enjoying both the action in the arena and the twins' commentary. They had to go to the bathroom again during the second section of team roping, and then they tried to talk Grady into a hot dog but he told them they'd eat on the way home and they didn't want to spoil their appetite.

“I'm going to be a barrel racer,” Katie announced, which pleased Lex no end—not because she wanted to run barrels, but because she was so much more confident about her horsemanship.

“Not me,” Kristen said. “I'm gonna rope.”

“Okay,” Grady said to Lex. “I'll go home and tell Annie she needs to start saving for two thirty-thousand-dollar horses so that the girls can be competitive.”

“I guess that's the beauty of rough stock,” Lex agreed. “All you need is your saddle. Or rope.”

“A decent set of spurs.”

“Medical insurance.” She felt herself sober after that. Grady touched her chin and when she turned her head, he kissed her lightly before taking her hand in his and setting it on his thigh.

“Don't get ticked with me for asking, but do you want to leave early? Before the bulls.”

Lex swallowed. “I think I'll be okay.”

“I'm right here.”

Yes, he was. Right there. Propping her up, when Lex had been raised with the notion that people shouldn't need propping up, and that tore at her almost as much as the thought of watching the bullfighters.

But she was going to be strong for the girls. “I'll be all right.”

And she was—to a degree. She tensed up when she heard the clangs of metal as the bulls were loaded into the chutes. Tensed up even more when the bullfighters came out and started doing their bit. One of them mugged for the crowd. The other stood quietly near the chutes, which was what her father had done. He wasn't there to entertain. He'd been there to save lives. And he did. A number of them.

Lex blinked a few times. Cleared her throat.

The announcer came on with a blare of music and announced that the final event would start in a matter of minutes. “And by the way, folks, I've just gotten word that we have a pretty danged famous bull rider here in the crowd. Local boy, too. Grady Owen! Give a wave! Let the people see you!”

Grady gamely raised his hand as people craned their necks to get a look at him.

“Heading off to New York City pretty soon, aren't you, son?” the announcer asked. “That's right, folks. Grady is going to represent us at the Bull Extravaganza. As you know, they only let the best of the best into that competition. Let's give old Grady a hand and wish him good luck.”

The audience clapped, and the people sitting behind them reached forward to pat his shoulders. Grady's fingers tightened around Lex's, and she felt as if she were about to hyperventilate.

Why?

She was tougher than this. Why was everything getting to her all of a sudden?

“Let's go,” Grady said.

“I—”

“There'll be more rodeos in the future.” He got to his feet and Lex did the same, feeling like a loser, but also feeling the need to escape. It was hard to breathe and she felt light-headed.

“But—” Kristen caught the look Grady sent her and abruptly stopped speaking.

“We'll see the bulls at the next rodeo, pumpkin.”

“All right.” The disappointed words came out softly, breaking Lex's heart.

“I'm sorry about that,” Lex said once they were in the truck. Grady looped an arm around her neck and kissed her. “I don't know what happened.”

“It's okay,” he said, putting the truck in gear. “Right, girls?”

“Right,” they said unenthusiastically.

But it wasn't right. Lex knew it in her gut. Today had been a perfect storm of emotions, past and present, coming together to devastate her. She'd never once questioned the fact that Grady would resume his career. Had lain awake thinking about it, trying to contain her growing anxiety, convincing herself that it was natural to be concerned. Who wouldn't be? Grady was her friend. Her summer lover.

So why did she suddenly feel a hole opening up in her life? A hole that felt very much like the one she'd experienced when her dad died?

A hole that had taken her years to only partially fill.

Did she want to go through that again? Keeping busy so that she wouldn't think? Filling her farm with animals that needed her?

She didn't have any more room on the farm, and to be honest, she didn't know if she had any more room in her heart. Not for someone who would leave another gaping chasm behind.

* * *

G
RADY
DIDN
'
T
MAKE
the mistake of trying to make small talk on the drive home. Lex was silently working through matters in her head, and if the frown knitting her brow was any indication, they were serious matters. Him-and-her matters.

By the time they dropped the twins off, his stomach was so tight it felt like a walnut.

“How was it?” Annie asked as she met the truck to help the twins out before Grady took Lex home.

“We didn't get to see the bulls,” Katie said. “But Lex 'splained about that on the way home, so it's okay.” Lex had told the girls that her dad used to be a bullfighter and now that he was gone, it was hard for her to see bullfighters. The girls had been both impressed and empathetic, and Lex's simple explanation had eased the tension on the drive home. The tension with the girls, anyway. There was still a lot unsaid between the two of them, and he had a feeling whatever was coming down the pike wasn't good.

“And I lost a tooth!” Kristen announced. Grady opened his pocket and passed the tissue-wrapped treasure to his sister through the window. Annie gave him a questioning look, and he responded with an imperceptible shake of his head.

“Okay, ladies. Into the house.” The girls headed up the walk, Annie behind them. She turned and waved as Grady put the truck in gear. The drive to Lex's house was silent. Fine, they'd talk when they got there...only they didn't. Lex was in serious self-defense mode.

“Maybe going to the rodeo wasn't such a great idea,” he said, breaking the brittle silence after pulling the truck to a stop in front of her house.

“I have to face it sometime.” She half turned toward him in the seat. “I know we have issues to discuss, but not now. Not tonight.”

He didn't know if she wanted time to calm down or time to build up her defenses. Either way, there wasn't much he could do except to nod in agreement.

“We will talk,” she promised as she reached for the door handle, as if she assumed he thought she might try to dodge the matter. He didn't.

“I know,” he said in a stony voice. Lex got out of the truck and walked around the front. He waited until she unlocked her door and went inside, surrounded by bouncing, happy dogs; then once the lights came on he put his truck in gear.

Was this shades of the Danielle situation all over again? Would he have to choose between the woman he loved and bull riding?

If so, he knew in his gut that, difficult as it might be, he would choose differently than the way he did the last time.

* * *

L
EX
WAS
GETTING
tired of living in a state of anxiety, and now she knew why it was happening. She'd promised herself while grieving for her father that she would never, ever hurt like that again. And caring for Grady clearly opened up that possibility—it didn't matter where he spent his winters.

She couldn't do it. Wouldn't put herself through it.

She'd rather die than hurt like that again.

Lex flopped over in her bed, nearly knocking Felicity off the end. The cat turned in a circle and settled again, farther away from Lex's feet. She wasn't purring like usual, but instead seemed to be staying close in order to give some feline moral support. Lex could use it.

No, what she could use was a good smack in the face for letting things get so out of hand with Grady. Within a matter of two months he'd gone from being an adversary to being a frenemy, from frenemy to friend and finally he'd become her lover.

But she hadn't expected the “love” part in “lover” to start taking hold.

It was, and she was in trouble if she didn't stop matters immediately. Before Grady started thinking he might be in love with her...if it wasn't already too late.

He was something of a romantic.

Well, she wasn't. She was realistic and practical. She knew what had to be done, and it was better done now than later. She assumed he was coming to talk tomorrow. He was as impatient by nature as she was.

The business would be finished, and she would go on with her life. It wouldn't take Grady long to bounce back. Unlike her, he made friends easily.

And she could hate that thought all she wanted, the fact remained that she couldn't allow herself to travel too far down the wrong road...the road that led to mind-numbing pain.

* * *

G
RADY
STOPPED
BY
Annie Get Your Gun the next morning after driving to Lex's place and finding her gone. She was indeed at the store, getting ready to leave after dropping off some stuff she'd made.

“You want to talk,” she said as he came into the store.

“You said we would.” Danielle and Annie were in the back. He could hear their voices. One of them laughed lowly. What he wouldn't give to feel like laughing right now.