The Bright Side (13 page)

“
Jackie
?” she said when she answered my ring
.

I
made
a
stab
at
a
smile.
“You
sound
like
you’re
not
sure.” “I
didn’t
expect
to
see
you,
that’s
all.
You’ve
had
your
hair done.
It’s
…
nice.”
She
still
hadn’t
opened
the
door
more
than
a
crack
.

I thought I’d better force the issue. “Um … can I come in?
”

Melissa didn’t seem at all embarrassed. She stepped back and created just enough room for me to squeeze through
.

“So,” she said flatly. “What brings you here?
”

CHAPTER
6

I told
Melissa
my
story
at
the
kitchen
table.
Niall
sat
on
the floor
by
her
feet,
gamely
beating
an
old
stuffed
rabbit
with
a
rubber
hammer.
The
constant
squeaks
were
more
than
a little
bit
off-putting,
but
at
least
they
weren’t
screams
.

I didn’t want to jump right in at the good bit (as such), so I started with my headache. That was a mistake; Melissa seemed to assume that there would be nothing more to it and kept interrupting with pointless work and head-related questions. Eventually, I had to give up and skip past the preliminaries. The big moment, when it came, was less solemn than I would have liked. As soon as I had whispered the words “over the back of the sofa”, Niall gave his rabbit an extra-hard thump and it was that squeak, rather than my shocking revelation, that seemed to echo round the room
.

Melissa put her hand over her mouth, took it away, put it back, took it away again. I hadn’t expected her to leap from her chair and gather me in a warm embrace, but I’d hoped for some sort of physical contact. There was none. On the plus side, she did, at last, start to pay proper attention
.

When I finished speaking, she fiddled with her teaspoon for a moment, then said, “Jesus Christ”
.

“Yeah,” I said. “Exactly – Jesus Christ.” “Jesus CHRIST!” said Niall
.

Melissa nodded down at him then returned her gaze to me, shaking her head slowly and empathically. “I don’t know what to say.
”

“Me neither,” I replied. “It’s hard to believe.” “Believe it.
”

“
Lisa
. What’s she like?
”

“You know what? I just realised I don’t even know her second name. She moved in not long after Christmas with a friend of hers. Paula. They’re renting. They’ve kept to themselves. I don’t know what they do for a living or anything. But I wouldn’t be surprised to hear that Lisa’s a model.
”

“A looker.
”

“Yes. She is. She sure is. Blonde, but classy blonde, you know? Mid, late-twenties. Legs up to her ears. Slim. Big green eyes. Lovely skin. Always dressed to kill. Looks like she rolls out of bed in the morning with her make-up already done.
”

“Stop it. You’re making me sick.
”

“I’m making
you
sick? How do you think
I
feel about it?” “Sorry. Go on.
”

“She’s always had the hots for Gerry, I can tell you that much.
”

“How do you know?” “I just –
”

At that point Niall farted so violently that he almost levitated. He didn’t seem to notice and carried on hammering his rabbit
.

“Excuse
you
,” Melissa said with a hint of pride. “Sorry, Jackie, he’s been chuffing away like that all day. Must have been something he ate. Probably a wallet or a phone.
”

It wasn’t a topic I was keen to explore. I hurried on. “I just knew she fancied him, right from the off. First time we ever met her was on the day she moved in. She knocked on the door, introduced herself and asked if I had any ‘big strapping men’ lying around to help her get her TV out of the car. I was all friendly, the way you are, said I had a big man lying around, but I couldn’t vouch for his strappingness. So I called Gerry out off the sofa and when he appeared at the front door, she practically licked her lips. And you know what she said to him? Christ, when I think about it. She said, ‘Your wife doesn’t think you’re strapping, did you know that?’ Looking out from under her fringe like Princess frigging Di.
”

“What did Gerry say?
”

“He
didn’t
say
anything,
he
didn’t
know
what
the
hell
she was
talking
about.
Every
time
I
met
her
after
that,
she
always used
to
say,
‘How’s
Gerry,
still
as
strapping
as
ever,
is
he?’
It was
like
a
running
joke.
We
had
a
barbeque
in
the
summer. All
the
neighbours
were
there,
Chrissy
and
Robert
–
not
that Robert
stayed
long
–
and
she
stuck
her
head
in.
She
was
at
it
then
too.
Strapping
this,
strapping
that.
I
can’t
believe
I
used to
go
along
with
it.
”

“Well, why did you? If you thought it was proof that she fancied him …
”

“What was I supposed to say? ‘Oi, you, stop calling my husband strapping!’ And besides …
”

“What?
”

“Well … lots of women fancy Gerry. I see them all the time, on the street, in shops. Their eyes follow him when he goes past. They think I don’t notice them, but I do. I’ve always noticed them. I’m kinda used to it at this stage. I’m sure Posh Spice gets something similar.
”

Melissa pulled a face. She looked as if she had something to say. When she shrugged and muttered “Suppose so” I knew that wasn’t it
.

We
sat
in
silence
(bar
the
squeaking)
for
a
few
moments. “Anyway,”
I
said
then.
“This
suitcase
that
I
packed
…
I was
hoping
I
might
be
able
to
unpack
it
here.
For
tonight,
at least.”
I
tried
not
to
feel
hurt
–
and
certainly
not
to
show
it
–
when
Melissa’s
brow
furrowed
.

In fairness to her, she recovered quickly. “Of course,” she said, then remembered to smile. “Yeah, of course you can stay here, there’s a room lying free. But …
”

“What?
”

“Well
…
have
you
got
a
plan?
What
are
you
going
to
do
?”
Slowly,
I
pushed
my
shoulders
towards
my
ears.
“The
only
plan
I’ve
made
so
far
is
to
get
net
curtains
put
up
again.
”

Melissa pulled another face
.

“What is it?” I said. “Nothing.
”

“No, what?” “Nothing, honestly.
”

She was clearly lying, but I didn’t pursue it
.

“So,” she went on. “Is Lisa Gerry’s … I mean, are they having an affair or what?
”

“He says not. He says it was just once. He says never again.
”

“Do you believe him?
”

I shrugged again. There was a silence
.

And then, better late than never, she reached across the table and, briefly, rested her hand on mine. “It’s a terrible thing,” she said
.

For the first time since I’d arrived – for the first time in years – I heard sisterly concern in her voice. There wasn’t a lot of it, but it was there. It was a start. I thought of that bit in
The
Weakest
Link
where the contestant opts out, protecting their gains to date:
Bank
.

“My head’s not getting any better,” I said. “Would it be all right if I had lie-down for a while?
”

“Oh,” Melissa said, surprised. I’d only been there for ten minutes. “Oh, right. I’ll show you to your room.
”

Niall thumped his rabbit again. “DEAD!” he declared with real delight
.

“Good boy!” said Melissa
.

* * *

I had wanted a lie-down because I felt weak and sick. It was nothing to do with tiredness; headaches and sleep didn’t go together, not in my experience anyhow. And yet I was dead to the world within a few minutes of collapsing on Melissa’s guest bed. I just shut down, like a computer that was trying to open too many documents at the same time
.

Normally, my dreams were highly abstract. I woke up most mornings trying to guess the significance of the giant talking toothbrush or wondering who the old man with the spider’s legs was supposed to be. But on this occasion, I had one that was fairly self-explanatory. I was sitting behind a desk in a tiny office, not much bigger than a cupboard. A succession of women trooped in and sat opposite me, their faces inches from mine, and explained how Gerry had given them the greatest sexual experience of their lives. A few of them were famous. Sharon Stone was there, for example. She told me that Gerry had “nailed” her up against a wall behind Tesco. When I woke up, I was astonished to find, firstly, that I’d been asleep at all, and secondly, that I’d been asleep for hours; it was almost seven o’clock. My headache hadn’t cleared completely, but it had lost most of its teeth. I went to the bathroom to give myself a bit of a wash and tidy-up, then tiptoed down the stairs. I found Melissa in the kitchen, methodically chopping a courgette
.

“Oh,
you’re
up
and
about,”
she
said.
“How
do
you
feel
now?”
“Much
better,”
I
replied.
“Can’t
believe
I
slept.” “Colm’s
home
from
the
hospital.
He’s
in
the
living
room
playing
with
Niall.
Why
don’t
you
go
on
through?
Dinner will
be
a
while
yet.
”