The Boys Club (15 page)

He reminded himself that he was there to protect her,
nothing more. He pulled his hand out of the blanket and grabbed the gun off the
ground next to him. He held the gun over the blanket in front of him, his
finger twitching under the trigger, ready to act if anyone dared to disturb
them.

But he couldn’t ignore the way her body felt against him and
how she clung to him for protection. For a moment he wondered if she wanted him
as much as he did her. He hoped she didn’t, but given a choice to think about her
or about the three friends he lost tonight, he preferred to keep her in the
front of his mind.

“Did you kill any of them?”

Sara’s quiet question dragged him back into reality. Logan
didn’t want her knowing the dirty side of things, but he also didn’t want to
lie. “Yes.”

“How many?”

“Two.”

A long moment passed, and Logan worried he had upset her by
being honest.

Sara gripped his shirt tighter and moved even closer to him.
“Good.”

Her matter-of-fact answer did little to still his growing
need for her. Logan closed his eyes and prayed sleep would soon find him to
destroy all of his indecent thoughts about Sara.

Sara stirred to life, but kept her
eyes shut. Her stomach growled a bit. Though eager to get up and find some
breakfast, if she was lucky, Stephen would keep her in bed for a bit longer.
Smiling, she stretched her hands around his torso, slid her fingers down to his
hips, and nuzzled her cheek into his chest, hoping he would take the hint.

The corners of her mouth fell and she realized she wasn’t
cozied up with Stephen in her bed. His body never felt as good as the one she
woke up against. Memories of Logan getting her up in the middle of the night
and whisking her to safety colored her face and neck with a deep blush. She
sealed her eyelids closed. Her embarrassment kept her frozen in place and she
wished she could disappear. Maybe she could pretend to still be asleep.

“Sara? Are you awake?” Logan’s soft voice told her he either
didn’t know she was awake or he knew and was offering her an out from the
awkward situation.

She wished herself to disappear, but there she remained, her
head against his warm body and her fingertips still grazing his lower back. She
opted to play dumb and she popped off of him, her hands pushing him away.

“Good morning,” Logan said, with the same expression he
always wore, the one that gave her no indication as to his thoughts.

“Morning.” Sara lowered her head so as not to look directly
at him. She had to be a mess, having slept in the wilderness after a long race
to safety.

“I have some water and granola bars for breakfast, if that’s
okay.”

“That sounds great,” she said, as if he had offered up a
large feast. “I, uh…” She looked around at their camp and saw she still wore
his oversized socks on her feet.

“Our shoes should be dry by now if you need them.”

“I need to, um…” She chewed on her bottom lip and blushed
again.

Logan reached for his bag and opened it up. He pulled out a
roll of toilet paper and handed it to her. He dug around in his bag again and
handed her a shirt and a pair of jeans. “I managed to grab a couple items out
of your suitcase for you in advance, just in case we had to leave without your
clothes. It’s not much, but—”

“It’s perfect. Thank you for doing that.” The words gushed
out with a breath of relief. She reached for her shoes to put them on. “You’re
very prepared.”

“I’ve never needed the go-bag before last night, but it’s
definitely coming in handy.”

“I’m grateful for it. I’m going to… I’ll just be back in a
minute.”

“Take your time. Head away from the trail and watch out for
any wildlife, especially snakes.”

“Snakes. Of course.” Anxiety filled her chest at the mention
of creatures. She hadn’t given them a thought last night when they camped out
and she was now glad she hadn’t. She had never been a woodsy person and she
didn’t intend on becoming one anytime soon.

“Do you want me to come with you? I can make sure it’s safe
for you first.”

“No, I think I’m okay.” She started out of the structure,
but paused and looked over her shoulder. “Thank you.”

He nodded and resumed rummaging through his bag.

Sara took a moment to stretch out when she exited their
sleeping quarters. A crick had worked its way into her neck while she slept and
she hoped it wouldn’t bother her all day. She stepped carefully through the
trees, picking out landmarks to remember her location.

Morning birds chirped overhead and she paused to enjoy the
sound. A small rustle in a nearby bush startled her. She held still, wondering
if she should call for Logan. He had offered to help and he wouldn’t think
twice about coming to her aid.

A rabbit jumped out of the bush and Sara sighed with relief.
She continued on her way, determined to take care of this one thing herself.
Ever since her mother passed away, men had told her what to do. They had carved
out her life for her, always making sure she did the “right thing.” Much like
with ditching her security detail, she had something to prove, a small
demonstration that she could take care of herself without the help of a man.

Logan’s question if she wanted him with her struck her as
being different than her father or Stephen. He had asked, whereas they always
stated their intentions. Where to go to school, which friends she could have,
what occupation to choose, who to marry, where to live. Even small things like
when she should do a breathing treatment seemed to be planned.

But Logan asked. He gave her a choice. He had given her
choices for most of the time he’d had her under his watch, except when he had
to search her. It seemed such a small gesture, asking if she needed help versus
telling her she did, but one that she appreciated more than he could possibly
know.

On her way back to their camp, she prided herself on her
ability to take care of herself. Almost like a new step in life, she wondered
what else she could do with her newfound freedom. She could change careers,
maybe even go back to school to try something new. She could buy a house on the
beach. She could go on a vacation where she wanted. She didn’t have to marry
Stephen.

She stopped walking with the thought. She didn’t have to
marry Stephen. She didn’t need to be tied to someone she didn’t love for the
rest of her life. She could be free to find someone else, to date for the first
time. She had been bound by her father’s rules for so long that she wasn’t even
sure what kind of man she was attracted to. Though Mary always talked about the
men she found attractive, Sara paid only a little attention to it. She was
never free to do much more than listen to the dreams of others. Did she even
like men who looked like Stephen? Or would she go for someone different?

Taller, she decided. She knew for a fact she liked tall men
and Stephen was an average height. Maybe a lighter hair color than Stephen. The
hands were very important, too. She wanted strong hands, a bit calloused even.
Hands that could make her feel safe, but desired at the same time. And blue
eyes. Definitely blue eyes.

She giggled at herself. Stranded in the middle of the woods
with her father sending men to kill her, and she was thinking about men. Mary
had finally rubbed off on her. When she saw her again, she’d have to share it
all with her. Mary wouldn’t hesitate to rush her off to the bars to find her
blue-eyed, strong-handed man.

Sara ducked under the top of their camp and Logan looked up
as she entered. He held out his hand to help her inside, and she hesitated. She
had described Logan in her mind, down to the strong hands and light blue eyes.

She took his hand and crawled under the makeshift roof. She
sat as far away from him as possible before handing him the toilet paper roll
and her dirty clothes to put back in his bag.

“You okay?” he asked.

She shrugged, hoping he wouldn’t notice her ever-evolving
attraction to him. “Everything was fine. No snakes. I can take care of myself.”

He frowned at her last statement. “Of course you can. I’m
sorry if I implied earlier that you couldn’t.”

Sara wanted to strangle herself. She hadn’t meant any
disrespect or to diminish his concern for her wellbeing. “I didn’t mean that.
I’m sorry, I’m not sure where it came from.”

His expression cleared. “Don’t worry about it. I know how
stressful this situation is for you and I’m going to do everything to get your
life back to normal. Well, as normal as it can be with the FBI poking their heads
in it.”

“Thank you,” she said.

“For what?”

“You’ve done a lot for me and I’m sure you’ve sacrificed a
lot. You’ve saved my life more than once now and I know I’d be dead if it
wasn’t for you—”

“You don’t have to thank me. It’s my job to make sure you’re
safe.”

“Right, your job.” Sara lowered her eyes and wondered if
everything he did for her was only because of the job. “Still, thank you.”

“Are you hungry?” He held out a bottled water to her.

“Famished. You mentioned granola bars?”

He grimaced and dug around in his bag. “It’s not much. You
have the choice of peanut butter or chocolate chip. I recommend the peanut
butter ones so you get some extra protein.”

“I can’t,” she said. “I’m allergic to it.”

“That’s right, I forgot.” He handed her two packaged granola
bars. “Chocolate chip it is then.”

“Can we go back to the house after we eat?” she asked, as
she opened the plastic wrapping. “I need my inhalers.”

He reached into his bag and tossed her a small plastic bag.
“You should have everything you need there. I also have a nebulizer in here and
some EpiPens in case you accidentally eat the peanut butter granola bars.”

Sara smiled at his subtle joke. “How did you manage to get
everything before we left the house?”

“I didn’t. I had Allie give me duplicates of everything just
in case something like this happened.”

She took a small sip of her water. A pang of unfounded
jealousy touched her at his mention of another woman’s name. “Who’s Allie?”

“Doctor Connors,” he said. “She’s a doctor at the Church.
You’ll probably meet her when we take you in. She’ll want to look you over
before you go with the feds.”

His words relieved the ridiculous envy that she had no
reason to feel. “What’s the Church?”

“Our headquarters. You’ll see. For now, we need to get to a
phone and talk to Schaffer, my boss. I need to tell him what happened and find
out what he wants us to do next.”

“When are we meeting up with Jack, Charlie, and Les?”

Logan looked away and bit off part of his granola bar.

“We are meeting them, aren’t we?” she asked.

“No, we’re not.”

Her stomach dropped with his response. She didn’t want to
ask any more questions, but she couldn’t stop them from flowing out of her
mouth. “They’re dead?”

“Yes.”

Sara set her water down on the uneven ground and closed her
slack jaw. She had held up so well under the stress, but knowing that the other
three members of Logan’s team had been killed brought reality front and center
in her mind. Her father was trying to kill her and he sent men to do just that.
Instead of her, they killed three very capable men. She and Logan were beyond
lucky to be alive.

“I’m so sorry, Logan.” She knew the words would do nothing
to take away the rawness of his pain at losing his friends, but she had to say
something. Then another thought entered her mind and she raised her fingers to
cover her mouth. “This is all my fault,” she said, looking away from him.

“It’s not your fault.”

“Yes, it is. None of you would be here if it wasn’t for me
and it’s my dad who sent people to kill us. It’s entirely my fault.”

Logan stared at her during an uneasy, tension-filled minute.
Sara could not interpret his expression and tears flooded her eyes. She had
gotten three men killed, three men that she had come to like, all of whom had
saved her life. And still Logan was willing to put his life on the line for
her. She couldn’t handle being responsible for his death, too.

He moved closer to her and gently took both her arms. “I
want you to listen to me. This is not your fault. Nothing that your father did last
night, nothing he’s ever done, and nothing he does in the future is your fault.
I don’t want you to think that for a second. As for the others, every time we
leave the Church, we know there’s a possibility we won’t come back. All of us
had the opportunity to reject this job and none of us did. We knew who we were
up against and we all believed it was far more important to save your life than
to walk away and knowingly let you die. This is not your fault.”

Sara’s chin quivered and tears jumped from her eyes. Logan
climbed on his knees and gathered her to him. Meant as comfort, the gesture
only succeeded in making her cry harder. She gushed out a series of muddy
apologies against his shoulder. He didn’t speak, but held her tighter, his hand
caressing her back and stirring up more guilt in her soul. It wasn’t her
friends and colleagues who had died, but his. She shouldn’t be the one that
needed comforting, yet she couldn’t help falling apart in his arms while he
remained stoic and strong.

After she cried herself out, she pulled back from him and
kept her reddened face hidden in her hands. Logan handed her a wad of toilet
paper and she turned to the side to erase the evidence of the breakdown from
her face.

“I’m sorry,” she said, as she wiped the remaining dampness
off her cheeks. “I don’t know what’s wrong with me.”

“Nothing’s wrong with you,” Logan said. “You’ve been under
an incredible amount of stress and emotional trauma. This just pushed you over
the edge.”

“I still feel bad. I never wanted anyone to get hurt and now
all these people are dead.” A thought entered her mind and she caught her
breath. “Is Mary—”

“As far as I know, she’s fine. Her team moved her to a new
safe house yesterday afternoon, where she was reunited with her parents. If
Langston sent out a team to the safe house she was at originally, then the
attack most likely would have been coordinated with the attack on our house.
That way no one from either house could warn the others. Mary would have been
long gone.”

“How do you know that’s what he would have done?”

“If I had planned it out, that’s what
I
would have done. It’s the smart way to hit your enemies in two
locations without one having time to warn the other. Your father is incredibly
smart and methodical in everything he does.”

Sara took slow, deep breaths and tried to calm herself.
Logan’s words made sense and she had no reason to believe anything had happened
to Mary. “So what are our next steps?”

“We’ll head down to the main road and follow it east, in the
direction of the Church. We need to stay hidden in the trees on the side of the
road. We can’t take a chance that they are still out here looking for us. We’ll
find a phone and call Schaffer to get direction from there. No matter what, we
have to get out of the open by tonight.”