The Beauty Within (16 page)

conversation’.
What
? I’m his
girlfriend
and
you’re
my
sister
! I have a right to know what they were talking about!”

“What does me being your sister have to do with anything?” Tyler had

asked absently, snipping at Wendy’s hair.

“You know that boy was callin’ Damon to talk about
you
. Don’t be purpose-

fully dense, Tyler!”

86

Savannah J. Frierson

Tyler’s nostrils flared, but she said nothing. There was no point, really.

Gunnar had moved on from…whatever they had been. Friends. More than. The

potential for more than.

Tyler didn’t want to think about it anymore.

Tyler was grateful when Wendy moved the topic to random bits of news-

room gossip, and she was mildly interested in the fact the anchorwoman on the

newscast was apparently pregnant by the weatherman…who was decidedly
not

her husband. How Wendy knew this, Tyler didn’t particularly want to know,

but Tyler did feel a little shame at the relief she gained from knowing people

had a bit more issues in their lives than she did right then.

Wendy turned out to be her last customer of the day, and Tyler had in-

sisted her sister go home…no need to baby-sit as she nursed her bruised ego or

the hope Gunnar would walk through the door for a haircut…or to talk.

Of course, that never happened. What did, however, was Tyler, in the low-

est point of her weakness, taking out the card she’d stuffed in her smock’s

pockets and dialed the number on the back of it.

She had a date with Quincy Lucas, the first in six years.

“I am an idiot,” Tyler whispered to herself as she sprayed perfume on her

neck. Her hair was free about her head, and she wore a strapless black blouse

with matching black slacks, dressy but not too dressy. She wore a pearl

necklace, a gift from her father some years back, to break up the monotony of

her attire, and her lips and cheeks were a falu red. She looked good, and she

knew it, but part of her wondered if her appearance were more for herself or to

make sure Quincy knew what he’d been missing for all this time.

“Probably nothin’,” Tyler muttered, scowling at her reflection. “Probably all

happy with that high-yella, weave-wearin’ heffa o’ his…”

She’d try not to let her bitterness show too much throughout the dinner.

Quincy, however, seemed to be on a mission to make her know what she’d

been missing herself. He approached her door two minutes before he said he

would, and when she opened it, he presented her with a yellow rose, her

favorite.

“You remembered,” Tyler said, mildly surprised and unable to stop the tiny

smile that formed on her face.

“As if I could ever forget you,” he said in a tone that, had they been dating,

would’ve made them late for their reservations. Instead, Tyler stuck the flower

in the vase resting on the end table next to the door, grabbed her jacket, and

left the house. He’d promised her good food, and she wouldn’t turn that down,

no matter how smarmy the company was turning out to be.

True to his word, they were dining in one of Durham’s trendiest Italian

restaurants. Tyler could barely pronounce the name, but the aroma had hit her

nose before they’d even walked through the door, and Tyler eagerly anticipated

her meal. Ever the gentleman, Quincy opened doors, pulled out chairs, and

even ordered for her—something Tyler normally wouldn’t let a man do for her.

The Beauty Within

87

But Quincy wasn’t just any man, and the fact he’d remembered her tastes made

her heart flutter against her wishes.

“I did all right, didn’t I?” he asked a little smugly. The candlelight on the

table brought out the rich tones of his dark skin, and Tyler gripped her glass.

He’d always had soft skin, the kind that was perfect for nuzzling and kissing.

He’d worn her favorite cologne of his as well—the one he’d worn on their very

first date no less.

Gauntlet, thrown.

“Why did you want to see me?” Tyler asked instead. “Does your girlfriend

know you’re here with me?” A paralegal at the law firm who Tyler had met

briefly at the one and only firm function Quincy had taken her. She’d been

wary at the lustful look in the other woman’s eyes whenever she had stared at

Quincy, and Tyler had soon learned there was a very good reason as to why.

Quincy met her eyes full on. “Michelle and I broke up three years ago.”

“Three years ago?”

“Yes. It didn’t work out.”

Tyler quirked an eyebrow and took a sip of her water. “So sorry to hear

that.”

“Liar.”

Tyler shrugged. “I could’ve told you it wasn’t going to work out, but I

didn’t want to come off as the jealous, betrayed, scorned ex-girlfriend…”

Quincy chuckled and nodded. “You’re right. I probably wouldn’t have be-

lieved you then.”

“At least you admit it.”

“There are a lot of things I need to admit,” Quincy said, his eyes locked

with hers. “So many things…”

Tyler sighed and sat back a little in her seat, smiling as the server poured

sweet tea in her glass and put a basket of garlic bread and olive oil in the center

of the table. This should all be water under the bridge, but the bridge Tyler had

built between the break up and now was rickety and fragile. She had a feeling

whatever Quincy was about to say would send that bridge and her tumbling

into those murky waters of memories and heartbreak once more.

“Don’t—”

“I’ve been very successful at the firm,” he began, taking a piece of bread

from the basket and pouring some olive oil on his plate. He broke off a piece of

bread and spread it in the oil, staring at it briefly. “I moved up the ranks, so

now I’m being considered for partner.”

“Congratulations,” Tyler said, genuinely proud of him. He’d always been

sharp, shrewd, and had a head for the law. During long study sessions, Tyler

had encouraged him whenever he’d felt burned out, telling him he would make

an excellent lawyer, one who was fair, just, and competent at what he did. She

felt a little smug she’d been proven right, even if she had to be collateral

damage toward his success.

88

Savannah J. Frierson

“All of my accomplishments don’t really mean anything, however,” he said,

his focus completely on her, “at least, not as much as they should.”

“Why not? This is what you worked for, all those nights in the library, all

those heavy books you bought, all that studying and focus—”

“You were there with me, Tyler. You. None of these things mean anything

now because I don’t have you to share them with.”

She gaped; she couldn’t help it. Even when the server put their plates in

front of them, Tyler barely noticed because she couldn’t believe Quincy’s

audacity.
Now
he decided to say the words she’d longed to hear for six long

years?
Now
, when she was starting to
really
move on to someone else?

“You’ve got to be joking,” Tyler said after the immediate shock dissipated.

“I’m not.”

“Well, even if you weren’t, so what? What does this change?”

“I told you the break up was only temporary…until I could make my

mark—”

“You thought I’d wait for you.” It wasn’t a question, but to hear her

thoughts confirmed wasn’t a good feeling. “You thought it would be all right

for you to date other women while I stayed here, miserable, alone, twiddling

my thumbs until you returned?”

Quincy frowned slightly. “Not exactly—”

“No.
Exactly
. You thought I’d be sitting at home waiting for you.”

He reached across the table and held her hand, his grip firm and nice de-

spite the fact she wished it weren’t. “You want the truth?”

“That would be nice.”

His thumb ran across her knuckles. “I thought it didn’t matter if you were

dating someone or not, because what we had was out of this world, Tyler. You

were my first love, my boo, and what we had was so good it could never be

duplicated. I came prepared to fight for you, Tyler. I’m not going to let you

walk out of my life like I did before.”

He had that determined look in his eyes that she’d found so sexy when

they were together. Now, it just annoyed her. “I didn’t walk out. You kicked

me out and threw my heart on the curb with me.”

His face fell slightly but he didn’t let go of her hand. “I know. I was an ass

and I let my ambition blind me.”

“Right. So now that you’re up for partner, you think it would be okay to

drag me back out into the sun, huh?”

“Tyler—”

“I look the same from six years ago, Quincy. I’m still fat, still dark, still nat-

ural. Sill
me
. If I wasn’t good for you before, how the hell would I be good for

you now?”

“You’re not fat—”

“I’m not skinny.”

“You carry your weight well. In fact, looks like you’ve lost some to me.”

The Beauty Within

89

“That’s
so
much better!”

Quincy sighed. “I’ve always loved the way you look, Tyler.”

“Until your boss said you needed someone more ‘appropriate’, right?

Someone who looked like she took care of herself. ‘Image is important’,

remember you said that to me…on the
phone
…as I prepared for my
father’s

funeral
?”

Quincy dropped his head and removed his hand from hers. “The timing,

perhaps, was a little off.”

“You think?”

“Don’t you think we could move past this? I thought you’d be over it by

now, but clearly I was wrong.”

Tyler blinked slowly and moved her head to the side. “
Over
it?” she re-

peated, her voice no more than a whisper. Throughout all of this, they hadn’t

touched their food, and she wasn’t particularly hungry now. “Negro, you ’bout

five seconds away from me going into Angry Black Woman mode. Check

yourself.”

They stared at each other for a few beats, then Quincy glanced at her plate.

“Are you going to eat?”

“Not hungry.”

“Doggie bag?”

Against her wishes, Tyler grinned at the label. He might be a hotshot law-

yer now, but he still had glimpses of the man she used to love. Perhaps that

was why she was so angry and torn. He hadn’t fully committed to being a jerk,

and his flashes of sweetness always brought out those latent tender feelings

she felt for him.

“Yeah. Wrap it up.”

Thirty minutes later, they were back in her driveway, the ride from the res-

taurant just as quiet as the trip to it. She picked up the white paper bag that

had her takeout, the contents still warm since neither had eaten dinner.

“Um, thanks,” Tyler murmured, getting out the car. She’d wanted a clean

getaway, but Quincy refused to grant it to her.

“Let me walk you to your door.”

“I’m fine, Quincy.”

“Please, Tyler.”

Clearly she was a sucker for chivalry, for she nodded and let him fall into

step with her. She reached the door and put the key into the lock, but his arms

came around her body and his hands closed around hers.

“I’m sorry.”

That soft tone, the tone he’d used when he’d broken up with her, dragged

out the maelstrom of emotions she’d been feeling all night. She sniffled, and he

turned her around to face him.

“I was a fool.”

Savannah J. Frierson

“First step is admitting it,” she cracked, hurriedly wiping away a tear that

fell down her cheek.

“I went about this all wrong.”

“Second step.”

“You haven’t forgiven me.”

“And for what would I forgive you?”

“Putting things on hold between us.”

“
On hold
?” Tyler let out a bark of laughter. He still didn’t get it. “No. That

was just the icing on the proverbial cake. I’m mad you completely dismissed

me, betrayed me, belittled me,
disregarded
me and the love I felt for you. As if I

was incidental and expendable and
replaceable
. As if the love I felt for you,
the

love we shared
, wasn’t worth
shit
.”

As she spoke, he’d backed away from her, the force of her anger and hurt

hitting him fully. She hadn’t even raised her voice, but she’d long passed the

point of ranting and raving. This was just resignation now.

“I didn’t go about it right,” Quincy mumbled.

“How is there a right way to break someone’s heart, Quincy?”

“I didn’t mean to—”

“But you did,” she said quietly. “My feelings weren’t as important as your

goals. The fact you let some man who deemed me not beautiful enough or slim

enough or light enough or have enough ‘good hair’…convince you that I would

be a
liability
when I was the one who
helped your ass get that internship
. I don’t care

if he was your mentor, either! It’s like you had selective amnesia, took all leave

of your senses, and let that man’s self-doubts about being black in a predomi-

nately white firm affect
our
relationship. You were supposed to stand up for

me, but you didn’t.
That’s
what hurts the most, Quincy.”

It felt good to say everything she’d wanted to say to him that fateful day on