Take Me Away (14 page)

“No.” I lean over and kiss him. “No. Treston, you are everything to me. I know it seems like we’re going fast and I don’t care. You want me to be patient and I am. You want me to not ask about your past or where you go and I can accept that for now. You are my world and I’m so glad to have you. I’ve been in love with you for months.” I tighten my grip on his hands, letting him know that what I’m saying is true. “You, Treston Parker, are amazing.”

“I don’t know how you’re in my life or what I did to deserve you.”

“Well, it’s something you’ll have to deal with.” I climb onto his lap and kiss him again. Our tongues meet and I feel his erection growing. “I want to ride you.”

Treston doesn’t answer. He moves to the top of the bed and grips my waist. Slowly, he lifts me up and slides me down on him. Wow.

“I love you,” I tell him, sliding up and down.

“I love you. More than you know.”

CHAPTER 17

TRESTON

MAYBE IT’S ONLY me who feels this strongly for the woman I love. I can't imagine anyone else experiencing a love like this. The hope she gives me, that everything will be okay, helps me see that. Even though she still doesn’t know everything about my past, she still accepts me and respects my boundaries. Zara’s doing what she promised me. She’s giving me time and she’s being patient. Having her in my arms makes me feel whole. She’s the missing piece I’ve been waiting for, never thinking I’d find.

It’s because of her I’m a different and better man. I’m the man before life slapped me in the face. One day I want to be able to not hide and give her everything. Giving her the world, even though she doesn’t want it, just to see that beautiful smile is what I’m living for. Some people think you can’t fall in love or find your forever so young, but I think it’s bullshit.

Every time I look in her eyes I feel a calmness and it’s because of her. She’s like no other and my life seems to have more meaning now that she’s here. I know it sounds ridiculous and we’re both young, but you only experience this sort of love once in your lifetime.

As much as I loved Emily, and she’ll always be in my heart, there’s something about Zara that makes me want to be better and try harder. I need to be near her all the time and hear her tell me she loves me. I’m not sure why I feel insecure when we’re together and apart. Now that she’s with me, she’s getting more attention. Some positive, but mostly negative. The skanks hate her and the guys wonder about her. It pisses me off when they look at her. I want to kill all of them.

But I won’t.

For her.

We’re close to Zara and Jackson’s house and my hands are clammy. I’ve met her parents before so I shouldn’t be nervous, but spending time with her parents and trying to behave, well fuck me.

I’m glad for a few days off from school and practice and to finally spend some quality time with her, not worrying about getting up for practice or working out. We’re spending the night at her parent’s house and then tomorrow night going to my parents’ house. The weekend’s still up in the air, but I’m sure she’s going to want to head back to her parents’ after dinner and go shopping in the morning. I have what to get her for Christmas all planned in my head.

“Man, you have the cheesiest smile on your face,” Jackson points out. Things were a little weird at first between us, but he knows I love Peaches and I’ll do anything for her.

“Just thinking about the holidays. You know this is the first time I’m bringing someone home with me since Emily.”

I’ve been talking about her a little more, but not everything. Maybe one day it’ll happen. For now, people know Emily as my girlfriend who passed away. I’m not ready to fully open those wounds.

I look in the rearview mirror and see Zara sleeping. It’s not that long of a car ride, but I had to make some stops and she got tired. She looks beautiful sleeping. Her long blonde hair covering her shoulders, slightly falling on her face. My beautiful angel.

Parking the car in her driveway, Kasey and Joe run out of the house. I turn around to wake her up and she slowly opens her eyes.

“Wake up, Peaches.”

“We’re here?” She groggily asks.

“Yeah.”

Stretching her arms over her head, her shirt slightly lifts and I can feel myself getting hard. Fuck, how am I supposed to behave during this break?

Opening my door, I rush over to open hers. Jackson takes out the luggage before he greets her parents, then shakes my hand.

“I’ll see you tomorrow, man.”

“You too. And hey, if we end up doing something tonight, even just watching a movie, you should come over.”

Jackson looks over at me then Zara, “Thanks, but there’s some people I need to catch up with. If you and Zara want to do something, let me know.”

“Sounds good, man.”

Taking the bags from the ground, I watch Zara hug her parents. She reaches out her hand and I take it to join the three of them. For some reason, seeing their love makes me feel good.

Joe and I shake hands and Kasey gives me a hug. "Come inside you guys," she urges us.

"Want anything to eat or drink?" Joe asks.

"No, I'm okay. Thank you though."

They lead us inside and we follow Kasey upstairs. First stop is Zara's room. I place her bags on the floor and look around. It's simple and plain. I figure most of her things are at the lacrosse house. There are some pictures on her wall. One stands out. It's in the middle, with several other pictures surrounding the main one. She's smiling and holding her pink lacrosse stick with a man hugging her.

"That's me and my dad, Scott."

"You were adorable when you were younger," I smile, bringing her close to my body and kissing the side of her head.

"Thanks. It's the last picture of him and I." Cue my heart breaking. I kiss the side of her head again and hug her tighter. "I think you two would have liked each other. He's like you in a way."

"How so, baby?"

"He loved with his whole heart, like you love me with yours."

The only thing I can do is hug her. Resting my chin on the top of her head I realize, at this very moment, how much she means to me.

Kasey comes back into the room and smiles. “Treston, your room is down the hall." Knowing that Peaches is down the hall from me is going to nearly kill me. Looks like I’ll be jacking off a lot. "You can use anything in this room and make yourself comfortable.”

"Thank you very much for your hospitality."

"You're welcome, honey." She walks over to us, holding onto Zara's arm and touching my cheek. “Oh, you’re so welcome. We’re going to head out for a little to pick up some last minute things so you and Zara make yourselves comfortable.”

Wait. Parents leaving and we’ll be here alone. Zara doesn’t have any brothers or sisters. She pulls away from me and takes my hand, leading me out of her room. Walking down to where I'll be sleeping, I look around the room. It's nice and cozy. There's a bed, closet, dresser and nightstand. Pretty typical.

When I look over at her and see the desire in her eyes, I’m ready to pull her down on the bed. Planting a kiss on her very sexy lips, “I haven’t kissed you in a few hours.”

“I know,” she giggles, wrapping her arms around my middle. “Thanks again for coming. It means a lot to me. I can’t wait to spend Thanksgiving with you. It’ll be our first one.”

“Same here.”

“So.” A mischievous look on her face, “Want to go swimming?”

Hell. Yes.

The day goes by smoothly and kind of hot. Having sex in a pool has to be the best feeling. So good, we did it twice. My girl is a freak and I love her.

Joe and Kasey take us out to eat and we talk about school and lacrosse. It’s nice sitting here with them and getting to know more about her family. We have a great time at dinner, which I thank them for as we leave and when we get back to the house, Zara wants to go for another swim.

Watching her walk out of the house in her tiny bikini again wakes up my cock. I love seeing her naked and like this. Shit, I love seeing her in any form. She slowly walks the stairs to the pool and swims to me.

“A night swim?” I cock my brow.

“It’s nice out tonight and I want to relax. Is that a problem?”

“Not at all.” We share a kiss and it’s even better than the last. “Tell me something no one else knows.”

“I had the chance to go to Boston with Jackson, but Duke's been my dream for so long. Jackson kept pressuring me. He said he wanted me to come to Boston so we could start our lives together. At that moment, I knew I couldn't be with him. No one knew I was accepted. I told everyone they didn't accept me. Picking Duke led me to you, Treston.”

My heart swells and my chest tightens. Only Peaches can make me feel this way. “I’m glad you made the right decision.”

“Me too. Your turn.”

This is the moment I need. Since playing this game, I’ve been hinting at little things to prepare myself to tell her about Emily and what happened that night. I want to tell her everything and hope she understands. I blow out a steady breath, still holding on her.

Just as I'm about to tell her, I hear thunder in the night air. My body stills and I'm gripping her tighter to my body. I look around, my eyes going in every direction. The thunder rumbles again, followed by lightning that illuminates the sky.

Emily.

Stop driving!

Do you see me trying to wave you down?

It's not safe. Why are you out here?

Emily!

I hear the crunching of metal and then silence. There's smoke coming from where the car went down the hill. No, she can't die.

No.

"Treston?" I'm brought back to the now. She’s studying me and waiting. I’m trying to control my emotions, but thinking about telling her is throwing me into a dark internal rage. I hate that I’m holding onto this secret and have been since she died. It’s slowly killing me and I thought I was ready to tell her and let her in, but I’m not. I wince and hold her tighter, afraid she’s going to run.

“Treston? Babe, what’s wrong?”

I remain in the same position and don’t move. I’m doing everything I can to not break down and cry. It’s fucking killing me.

I’m breaking.

I’m falling.

I’m slowly being brought back to the corner, where the demons are swallowing me. It takes everything in me to pull myself up. I keep hearing her voice, pleading with me to come back to her. She's in front of me and I'm running away. Her love is in front of me and I can reach out and touch her. I hold back.

Looking away from her, I quickly get out of the pool and head inside. Taking the stairs two at a time, I walk into the guestroom and look around for something, anything. I’m not sure what I need. I’ll know when I find it.

It feels like the room is getting smaller and my chest feels tighter. I was so close, but I couldn’t do it.

“Treston? Talk to me.”

“I can’t.” I tell her, clenching my fists at my side. “I keep trying, but the words don’t come out. I don’t know what else to do. I don’t know how else to hold it all in. I feel like fucking breaking something.”

She walks to me and places her hand on my arm. I jerk away from her and back away. “Don’t, Zara. Don’t touch me.”

“Babe, I’m here okay? I’m here and I love you and I want to help you. You have to learn how to let me in so I can understand and take you away from your past or whatever is causing you this much pain.”

“You want to take me away?” She nods. “How? How are you going to do that? I’m so fucked up in the head.” I rub my face with my hands and turn away from her. I can hear her crying and it’s killing me. I hate making her cry. I hate that we’re back to square one. She's pushing me, begging me to let her in so she can stay. In my head, this is a game and I'm hoping she'll figure out how to win because I don't know how to finish.

I feel her arm touch me again and I jerk so fast I end up pushing her. She falls to the ground and I hear a thump.

“Shit. Baby, shit. I’m sorry.” When I try to help her up, she pushes me away.

“No. You pushed me, Treston.”

“Baby, I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to.” Before I can say more, she’s turning away with tears in her eyes. “Please don’t walk out the door, Zara. I’m not good at showing my feelings, but I’m begging you to be patient. Let me prove my love for you. You’re all I need. Stay with me.”

“Show me your feelings? Prove your love? Treston, I know you love me and you don’t have to prove anything. Just let me in.”

"What am I doing to you?"

Our eyes stay on each other. Her love is so strong and so pure. It's scaring me and I know the love we have for each other won't go away.

But I need to push her away.

Even though she's the one I've been waiting for, to pull me back to reality, out of my head, I can't.

"Oh, God," I whisper. I walk to the wall and fall to the floor. The wall's holding me up, but I'm broken into small pieces. She doesn't need a man like me; a broken man with walls so high no one can climb or break them down.

Staring at the ground, imagining my life, alone, without anyone to help me. Two voices are screaming at me.

Don't let her go. She's standing in front of you.

You need to let her go. You don't deserve her.

My hands go up to my head and through my hair and soon sobs wrack my body.