Surviving Love (18 page)

As his hands leave my cheeks and slowly brush down my arms, I begin to feel the tingling excitement at the apex of my thighs. Drake bends down, grips my ass, and lifts me up with his powerful arms, holding me pressed against the wall. I wrap my legs around his waist.
 

“But I can give you this,” he whispers, and before another word forms, Drake reaches down between our bodies and joins us. I feel his cock enter my body and everything stops as pleasure takes over.
 

Drake grinds against me, slamming his body into mine. It doesn’t take long to feel the heat building in my core, and before any other thought can register, I come—hard. The shivering is present when the pleasure erupts and channels its way through my entire body.
 

He pumps into me a couple more times then drops me onto the bed, coming down on top of me. When I open my eyes, I see his semen fall from his dick and onto my breasts. Beads of his white fluid pool and trail across my breasts, and I’m mesmerized. Seeing his face become completely overtaken by the pleasure I was giving him is enough to make me want to come again. I can feel the heat beating at the heart of my core.
 

I take my finger and trace it down my body, dipping it into his juices resting on my breast then put my finger in my mouth, tasting his saltiness. I move my hand between our bodies landing it on my clit. Drake looks back at me with want and lust. I start to move my fingers in circles on my small, sweet spot.
 

With my other hand, I push Drake off of me so he’s kneeling on the floor, giving him an up close and personal view of my show. He sits back on his heels, his face captivated as I deeply run circles over my clit. The intensity is growing and my fingers are complying with my body’s needs. I keep moving them around, faster and faster with every second. Drake hasn’t looked away. He gazes between my legs as I start to quiver. His eyes meet mine and he watches me as I unravel for him.
 

I let the pleasurable feeling comedown a bit, and then I sit up so our faces are close once again. I desire to kiss him, yet I respect his inability to have more and say, “And I can give you this.”
 

Drake
 

After fucking Zoe for the third time, she has fallen into a deep, deep sleep. I, on the other hand, am completely awake. The tequila in my system has burned off hours ago, and as I lie next to this beautiful woman, guilt is all that my body feels now. Being with her has been amazing and I’ve never expected it to be as intense as it was, but what have I really done? I’m confused because one part of me really likes what Zoe and I have together, but the other part of me feels like I’ve just cheated on Presley.
 

I really don’t remember too much of what sex was like before I met Presley. With her, it was always gentle and soft. Sometimes she’d get a little wild, but never what I’ve experienced with Zoe. I never really wanted to go too crazy with Presley, thinking I could hurt her or take her back
to a dark place she had experienced with Robert.
 

Zoe, on the other hand…well, I think she can take it. She’s not as fragile as Presley was, and I have a feeling her past has made her that way. She liked it when I came in her mouth and on her breasts. She liked touching herself, knowing I was watching. I don’t think any of that was an act. Zoe truly liked what she was doing, and the terrifying part is that I really liked what she was doing, too.
 

I look over and see light starting to come through the window. It’s time for me to go. I roll off the bed and quickly dress. After I put on my boots, I give another look to Zoe who is lying on her stomach with the sheet pulled down, just barely covering her ass, and I feel guilty again. She has told me that she couldn’t give me more, and I really hope she is serious. Because I know I can’t.
 

I pull open the door and walk out into the cold, winter morning. I let the Chevelle warm up for a couple of minutes while I scrape the windows then drive away from her apartment and to my house, dragging my guilt with me.
 

Chapter 17
 

Drake
 

When Mia and I go over to Mrs. Fields for our Thursday night supper, this is the worst I’ve ever seen her. She is lying in her bed while the nurse is sitting in the chair beside her. Mrs. Fields is barely able to keep her eyes open. She is still coherent, which the nurse tells me is a good sign, however it won’t be long before she will not be awake at all because she will be gone. Like Presley, gone.
 

Mia is watching Mickey Mouse while snuggling up with Mrs. Fields as I nervously start to think, pacing the room, when her faint voice stops me in my tracks. “Drake…can you do something for me?”
 

I fall to her side, holding her hand.“Of course. Whatever you need.”
 

“I know it won’t be long now…” My heart falls to the floor, knowing what she saying is the brutal truth I do not want to hear. “I want to have Thanksgiving dinner.” Confused, I’m thinking she wants me to run up to Francine’s, the local diner, and ask for their version of Thanksgiving dinner, but I stand corrected. “I want you and your family to come over here on Sunday. I want all of us to have Thanksgiving dinner. I know I won’t…won’t make it ‘til then.”
 

Tears start to fill my eyes and I nod at her request. It is the least I could do for the years of love and support she’s shown me. “Consider it done.”
 

***
 

Sunday rolls around quicker than expected. Mia is settled in her car seat as I finish loading the groceries in the trunk. My entire family has jumped all in when I told them about Mrs. Fields’s request. Delilah and Darcie went shopping for the groceries and started making some of the food ahead of time yesterday. Reggie and I loaded Big Mike’s truck with a long table and chairs from the bar yesterday and set them up in the apartment.
 

Zoe has said she’ll take care of the decorations and help with the cooking. We have not really talked since the night we had sex. I snuck out of her apartment like a coward because I was too afraid to confront the new emotions she’s starting to make me feel. Before we had sex, we were friendly with one another. There were times where she’d tell a wildly inappropriate joke, making me laugh, but we’d never been on a level of intimacy. Once we had sex, all of that changed.
 

There is something hidden behind her eyes. She’s fighting with something, but what?
 

A week later, the guilty feelings of being with her have not gone away. I really enjoyed the night we spent with one another, but what did I do to the memory of Presley? Am I starting to replace her because I’m feeling something new for someone else?
 

After I left her apartment that night, I drove home, wanting to turn back. I didn’t want to leave like that—I wanted to be with her one more time. However, I knew reality would always be chasing me, and I have a devotion to myself and to Presley that she’ll be the only woman in my life.
 

I pull into the apartment parking lot and pull my Chevelle next to Zoe’s. I take Mia from the
back then make my way to the door. When I walk in, Zoe has pushed all the living room furniture to the walls to make more room for the table Reggie set up yesterday. She’s draped a Thanksgiving themed tablecloth over the table and has a paper cornucopia sitting as a center piece.
 

I set Mia down and she goes running into Zoe’s arms, demanding to be picked up. Zoe obliges my daughter and smiles. “Zoooooeeee!”Mia shouts then puts her arms around her neck. Zoe looks to me and is slightly confused, considering this is the most affection Mia has shown her, but she doesn’t say anything, just hugs Mia back. “Go see Nanny?” Mia asks and squirms down from her arms.
 

“Sure,” Zoe says and then follows Mia down the hall and into Mrs. Fields’s room.
 

I head down to the car and start hauling up the groceries as the rest of my family pulls into the parking lot. Jake is carrying the electric roaster with the turkey, Reggie has his arms full of other covered dishes and Darcie and Delilah have sacks of stuff. We all set the items where we can find the space and then the girls get to work, finishing up the meal.
 

Reggie, Jake and I set the chairs around the table then sit in silence. The reason why we are here is a little awkward for us, knowing this will be the last Thanksgiving meal Mrs. Fields will have. And from now on, I won’t be able to get through a Thanksgiving dinner without thinking of her. The day is going to be bittersweet, but it’s important nonetheless.
 

Zoe
 

I was really nervous this morning at knowing I would see Drake for the first time since last Saturday night. It was one of the best nights of my life, though when I woke up to an empty bed, I didn’t feel great at all. I actually felt lonely—a feeling that hasn’t surfaced in years. I’ve always been okay on my own and really enjoyed it, yet after that night, loneliness is all I’ve been feeling. It’s scary.
 

Two days ago, I finally got the nerve to call Connie’s daughter to tell her about her mother’s condition. I knew their relationship was rocky, but I wasn’t expecting to get the cold-hearted comments coming through on the other end.
 

“The prodigal whore returns. So what do you want, Zoe? Money for a VD treatment?” I couldn’t believe what I was hearing. Granted, she’s called me a whore before, but it’s been years since we’ve spoken and this is how she’s going to treat me?
 

“Well, I can see nothing’s changed,” I snap back.
 

“I know all about you, Zoe. Sophia enlightened me and your mother when you left four years ago and I’m ashamed you’re related to me.” I can hear Rebecca’s disdain in her voice. It pisses me off even more with how Sophia would talk about me behind my back.
 

“I just called to tell you that your mother is not well. She’s not expected to live through the month and I thought you’d like to know.” I swallow down the anger burning inside of me, knowing my aunt is a few feet away from me.
 

“How do you know about my mom?”
 

“Because I’ve been caring for her for the last few months.”
 

“What! How did—”
 

“It doesn’t matter, Rebecca. I just wanted you to know that you could pay your respects and repent for your soul or whatever it is an evil witch needs to do to ask for a person’s forgiveness.” I can feel my blood pump wildly as the adrenaline storms inside of me. “Feel free to pass this information to Virginia as I won’t be calling her.
 

“Aunt Connie has been moved to her apartment where she will live out her final days. Call this number if you’re planning on visiting.” With that, I disconnected the call and slammed my cell phone on the table. Luckily for me, it didn’t break, but damn I wish it would have because I really wanted to break something right then.
 

I push the angry feelings from the memory of that phone call out of my way so I can properly care for my aunt. I step into her room and check her monitors. The home healthcare system has been working closely with me and teaching me how to take care of her. They’ve shown me how to properly bathe her, how to read the machines and change the catheter bag. I do it all, just so she will be comfortable and loved in her final days.
 

When I moved here, this was the last thing I expected to be doing. According to my initial plan, I would have been gone weeks ago.
 

I help dress her in a new nightgown I’ve purchased for her and then she falls asleep again. I am concerned she won’t make it through the dinner, and I know she won’t eat the meal. Right now she’s only surviving on what’s in her IV bags and that’s it.
 

Drake and Mia come through the door, bringing in the cold November air with them. I hold Mia in my arms as she requests to go see her nanny. When we walk in the room, Connie is sleeping again and I instruct Mia to be quiet as I turn the TV on low.
 

I then walk back to the kitchen and see the rest of the family has made it. I start pulling items out of bags and setting them on the counter. Delilah comes to my side and puts her arm around my waist, pulling me in for a hug. She’s a lot shorter than me, then again, girls typically are when you’re almost six foot tall. As Delilah is hugging me, I bend down and rest my head on top of hers. She takes my other hand in hers and just holds me, knowing today is going to be very hard.
 

“What can I help you with?” I ask as I break away from the embrace.
 

“Will you peel potatoes?” Delilah hands me a large sack of potatoes and a knife.
 

I get started as I grab a potato in my hand and start taking the skin off. I’m standing at the kitchen counter, but I can see the living room clearly. I get lost in my thoughts while I watch Drake interacting with his brothers. They are all very close and completely different from one another. When Mia comes running into the room, it doesn’t take long before she’s controlling the conversation and demanding all of their attention. She is a darling and as sweet as she can be.
 

Delilah moves to my side and starts peeling along with me. We stand there in silence until she breaks up my wandering thoughts. “He’s a lot happier now.”
 

“I’m sorry?” I ask, not understanding who the
he
is that she’s talking about.
 

“Drake. Since you’ve came into town, I’ve seen him smile more. It’s nice.” Delilah’s voice is quiet. I can’t think of anything to say. Drake and I haven’t really spent a whole lot of time alone together. We will randomly talk at the bar or text one another about Connie’s condition, but that’s it. Well with the exception of last weekend. “He hasn’t been happy for a long time. It’s nice
to see him smile.”