Surrender (26 page)
Authors: Rhiannon Paille
He tripped over his own foot and came crashing onto his knees, his palms skidding in the dirt as he neared the girl. His eyes trailed over her ankle as he found his footing. “Kaliel?”
She didn’t answer and the nausea returned. He took a deep breath, making out the shape of her body. Her knees curled towards her head, her back pressed against a thick red cedar. Her brow creased in worry, she looked terrified, even unconscious.
“Kaliel?”
She didn’t move.
His heart jumped as he pressed himself against the tree and pulled her into his lap. Her steady breaths came in shallow spurts like she had fainted. He held her hands between his own; they were clammy. He ran a hand over her forehead. It was cold, damp. His fingers traced along her cheek, her stained with tears.
“Kaliel, come back to me,” he whispered in her ear. He tried to stay calm, but panic settled in. He kissed her cheek, and pressed her face to his shoulder. “You can’t leave me.” He closed his eyes and tightened his grip on her, burying his cheek in her hair. He hadn’t forgotten about her in the last three moons, and he didn’t want it to be like this. Seeing her, he felt a surge of guilt and anger. He should have fought harder against Istar in the first place. He never should have let Kaliel go to Nandaro.
Moments passed in agonizing silence. Krishani listened to Kaliel’s faint breaths flushing in and out of her fragile lungs. He wanted to kiss away all the pain. He ran his hand along her forearm and down her back to the base of her spine. He missed her in a way he couldn’t comprehend until she was in his arms. She stirred and he stopped breathing, pressing his back against the tree as she came to life under him.
“Kaliel?”
She let out a groan, shifted her weight and lifted her head from his shoulder. Her emerald green eyes were bright even in the darkness. Krishani held his breath; he didn’t want to scare her and risk her slapping him silly. He was relieved to see her alive, awake, and in his lap. She mumbled something incomprehensible and nestled into him, lighting his entire body up with fire.
“Kaliel,” he whispered gently, trying to shake her back to reality. “I’m here.”
She moved like lightning, her arms straight, palms digging into his shoulders as she stared at him, confusion, fear, and anger in her expression. He reached for her upper arms but she scooted off him and slumped onto her knees in the dirt, wiping her face with her hands the way she did when she was crying.
Krishani didn’t want to see her like this.
“You left me,” she said, her voice low and scratchy.
How did she know?
he thought as the guilt lanced across his torso. He pushed himself to his knees and crawled to her, lacing his fingers through hers and trying to make her look at him. She tucked her chin in, avoiding him, her hands refusing to grip his. “I haven’t left yet.”
She shot him a look, her green eyes full of sorrow. “Why were you on the boat?”
He frowned. “What?”
She slid her hands out of his grip and stood, backing away. “I saw you on the boat.”
Krishani hung his head. So Mallorn was helping her. In the time she had been gone her abilities had gotten sharper. He couldn’t hide anything from her anymore. He raked a hand through his hair. “I have to go to the Lands of Men.”
Her eyes widened. “Because of your parable?” She looked weak, like she might crumble if he said anything more about it. He neared her, trying to put his hand on her shoulder but she shrugged away, stalking through the forest. He jogged to Rhina, grabbed the reins and followed her.
“Kaliel, wait—”
She slowed down but didn’t stop. Krishani followed her through the bushes, spindly leaves brushing along his shins. “Istar wouldn’t let me ignore it anymore,” he called after her.
She whirled, arms crossed, a fiery look in her eyes. “You mean the nightmares don’t you?”
Krishani nodded, a lump in his throat. He couldn’t tell her he was the Ferryman. It spelled so much disaster for him already he was afraid it would be the one thing that would shatter what he had with Kaliel forever. They reached a small clearing between the trees, thick ankle high grass below them. Kaliel stood beside a lanky cedar, the folds of her dress ruffling in the breeze. He wanted to make her forget all about what was happening, but he stood there, unsure if she’d let him touch her.
“You’re the Ferryman.” She sounded melancholy.
Krishani blanched. “How did you know?”
Kaliel sighed and it seemed like all her strength was failing, she pressed her palm to the tree to steady herself. “I had a dream … and in it we were burning. You called yourself the Ferryman, and you called me the Flame.”
Krishani closed the distance between them, towering over her. He covered her hand with his own, pulling it away from the bark, his eyes imploring her to forgive him. “I watched the Ferryman die. It’s my time now.”
Kaliel shuddered and pressed herself against him, wrapping her arms around his waist. “It feels like I’ve already lost you.”
He gripped her tighter, the feeling of her against him intoxicating. “I won’t surrender.”
“They’ll force you to go.”
“Come with me.”
He arms dropped to her sides and she pulled out of the circle of his arms, striding across the meadow. Krishani followed her, unwilling to let her make this the end. What Kuruny said reverberated in the back of his mind.
If you take this path you’ll never see Kaliel again.
He couldn’t tell her this might be the last time he saw her. He couldn’t let his destiny take over his life.
“What’s wrong?” he asked as he took another careful step towards her.
She turned; her eyes full of the Flame’s fire. Bright liquid amethyst shimmered in her irises, and her body sparked with the familiar white violet glow. “I saw him Krishani. I watched him kill the Ruby and Quartz Flames. If I go with you, he’ll find me.”
Krishani’s stomach dropped. He could try to protect her but the Ferryman followed death. He’d be on a battlefield constantly. It was no place for a Flame. He put his hands on her shoulders, feeling a charge through his body. He pulled the strap of her dress over her shoulder slowly, gauging her reaction. She didn’t move and he took another step towards her, cupping her face in his hand and sweeping his fingers down the nape of her neck. Her fingers curled around a handful of her dress as he ran his fingertips along her arm, lacing them together with hers.
She flushed a deep scarlet and the fire in her eyes faded, replaced by green. “What are you doing?” she whispered, uncomfortably fidgeting.
Krishani put his hands on either side of her face and forced her to look at him. “I’ll protect you.”
She let out an exasperated sigh. “You don’t know what you’re saying.” She averted her gaze, and he felt her fear. He couldn’t stand it, being this close to her, and so far from Orlondir, from any signs of life. It was the first time they were all alone, no threat of anyone interrupting them. He traced circles on her shoulder and she let out a shaky breath, clearly affected by what he was doing.
“I know I don’t want a life without you, Kaliel.”
She didn’t look at him, and he brushed his thumb across her lower lip. “Then don’t leave me,” she barely whispered.
He didn’t have to answer as she kissed his palm and he closed his eyes savoring the feeling of her touch. In a swift move he cupped her face and pressed his lips against her, forcing her mouth open, caressing her tongue with his. She gasped as he locked his hand around the back of her neck and held her to him, his hands making fast work of the buttons on her dress. It fell away from her chest and he cupped her breast as he walked her towards the edge of the meadow.
She let out a moan as he left a blazing trail of kisses down her neck. Her hands greedily explored his body. She had touched him everywhere before but this was different. She pulled at the hem of his tunic and he obliged, pulling it off and pressing himself against her.
“Krishani,” she whispered, and he took it as a protest. He dropped his lips to her ear, nipping at the tips with his teeth.
“I don’t want to stop.”
He felt her smile against him as she dug her fingernails into his back and wrapped her legs around him. “I don’t want you to stop.” She affixed her hips against him as he pushed her against a tree, needing a moment to catch his breath. He kissed her shoulder as he shrugged off his breeches and buried himself inside her. She let out a cry, as he pressed his hips against her, rocking back and forth. Her body clamped around him, making it impossible for him to think straight. His body stiffened as she braced herself, her hands flat against his shoulder blades.
She let out another loud moan as he went deeper, and something happened he couldn’t explain. She flared, bright wisps of white violet energy cascading off her body in sharp spikes. He lost control for a moment and swiveled, falling on top of her in the grass. He propped himself on his elbows, his eyes boring into her amethyst enflamed ones. She ran a hand down his chest, stopping at the baby hairs on his navel. Before she could say what he knew she was thinking he covered her mouth with his and pressed into her again, the exquisite feeling of being inside her making every bit of pain he felt evaporate.
He lost himself in the feel of her Flame as it circled them in its apogee of light and energy. He didn’t know what was happening to her but he wanted more of it. She was like the sun, and when he moved against her, more of it exploded from her. He’d never experienced anything like this. His body contracted and he let out a groan, feeling completely spent. He feathered light kisses on her neck, her temple, cheek, corner of her lips and she claimed his lips one last time before the unnatural light faded and he lay beside her. She curled into him, letting out a breath as they fell into a deep sleep.
* * *
28-Avred
Mallorn slept in his cabin, snoring, a tattered manuscript strewn across his chest. He snorted in a breath and wheezed out. Somewhere in the depths of his mind he travelled through a labyrinth of trees. These ones were whispering to him. He squinted into the fog and brushed his hand along the side of a trunk. The tree jostled. Ever since he had seen Kaliel make the trees speak he had been curious about what kinds of things they could have said to him all along. He anxiously paced through the forest; there was something he needed to see around one of the trees. He knew it was there and yet he couldn’t reach it. He neared the sharp turn; the trees precariously placed at a ninety-degree angle, so precisely put it was as if they were pointing towards his destination.
With a huff, he turned the corner and peered down a vast forest corridor. It was a long ways to its end and there were no breaks in the trees, no way to deviate or take a shortcut. He wondered what he was supposed to find. It was right there beside his memory, whatever it was.
What was he supposed to see?
He took a few steps forward and faltered. A brilliant violet light erupted in the distance from behind the trees, casting them in shadows as it flooded through the forest. He put an arm to his face to shield his eyes. As the light grew, its edges reached for him, but he turned and fled. Seeing the darkness in front of him, he raced towards it, his body jolting with each pound of his foot against the ground. His feet hit the shadows and his body was encompassed by it.
The scene didn’t change.
He stood in the forest, wondering why another dream wouldn’t start. He knew where he was, but was confused by the light. He turned, expecting the light to illuminate the dark, but his mouth dropped open and he fell to his knees.
The horses neighed in the barn beside him and he smelled the familiar scent of the air in Nandaro. He saw the scattered trees in front of him as though he was sitting there on a summer night, taking in the beauty of the twilight. Everything was normal except for what was floating through the trees.
The shadowy figure carried Kaliel’s lifeless body towards him as he knelt helplessly in the dirt. Mallorn made out the black mandarin style jacket and trousers of the foe, his bony fingers curled around the Flame’s body like shackles. He let out a cry, as he realized the Valtanyana would take Kaliel. His mouth gaped open in anguish as Crestaos neared him, his face concealed by the vastness of his hooded cloak. All Mallorn could see were his eye-whites, crackling white lightning, like storms. Mallorn knew his name, though he would never dare to speak it.
Crestaos’s steps carried with them utter precision. He walked with smugness in his posture, the sheer arrogance of his victory leaking off him. He passed Mallorn without a word, without a blow.
Mallorn couldn’t lash out at the enemy, unable to stop him from taking the Flame.
“Kaliel!”
He shot up from the wooden chair, knocked the manuscript and teacup on the floor. He jumped to his feet. She was gone.
“No, not—” He shook his head and tried to breath. They hadn’t actually taken her. Yet. He had time, but how much? Istar’s fears were becoming reality, he could feel it; the danger was near.
Crestaos knew where she was.
• • •
Sun kissed the treetops, showering Kaliel and Krishani in patches of sparkling light that danced along their forms. There were no nightmares last night; everything was seemingly perfect in their imperfect world. Wind rustled the leaves on the trees and Kaliel moaned as she heard birds chirping around her. She felt Krishani stir beside her and pushed herself off him. Her dress was in the grass beside her and she self-consciously grabbed it and pulled it over her head. She fumbled with the buttons in the back as she watched him, just as he began to wake up.
“Morning,” she said.
Krishani opened his eyes and shielded his face from the sun. He grabbed his garments, dressing himself. This was nothing like the waterfall. The cave was concealed; no one ever went there. The forests were so open; anyone could go for a morning walk and happen upon them.
“Morning,” he replied.
Kaliel hugged her knees and looked around the forest. She gritted her teeth as she thought about what might happen to them. She felt different, as though there was a buoy supporting her emotions, her strength. Everything was crisp and clear. She understood the songs of the birds, and sensed the presence of small game nearby. She turned to Krishani; he was even more amazing than he had been the night before. She was no longer afraid of him leaving her. That nightmare hadn’t come true. She breathed a sigh of relief as he sat beside her and pressed his head into her shoulder.
“What are you thinking?” he said, his voice gravelly and low. It was so sexy.
She smiled and placed her hand on his thigh. It still sent shivers up her spine. She smiled at the familiar feeling, but it seemed even more vibrant than before. She swallowed hard, trying to stifle her desires. There were more pressing matters at hand.
“Home,” she breathed. Not Orlondir; that had never been home to her. She wanted to return to Evennses, to live forever in the forests of her childhood. She wanted to show him the lake, and let him listen to the trees that spoke volumes to her. She wished he could meet Desaunius and the other kinfolk. They could sit in the meadow and trace the constellations. They could revel in simpler times and forget that the Lands of Men existed at all.
Krishani looked uneasy as he took her hand in his, lacing his fingers through hers. “I can’t return.”
Her eyes met his. She had something to say, but the expression on his face changed from concern to confusion.
“Your eyes are still amethyst.”
Kaliel raised her eyebrows in amusement. She felt better when her eyes switched colors, when her aura glowed and the Flame inside fought its way to the surface. “I suppose they are. Maybe they’ll stay that way.” She let out a short laugh as Krishani leaned forward to taste her lips. Shamelessly, she pressed herself into him and he pulled away.
“We have no home,” he said. He slumped into the grass as she lay down with her head in his lap.
Hope wasn’t lost on her. If anything she felt like it had been restored. There was no boat, no mists, no lake, nothing that could take him away from her. “We’ll find a home. Perhaps Desaunius—”
Krishani shook his head. “Desaunius was at the ceremony. She wills that I go.”
She pushed herself up on her elbows and looked him in the eyes. She was at a loss for words, Desaunius only wanted happiness for her. This was the opposite of that. “Atara?”
Krishani shook his head again. “It was her order that I take the path.”
Her head fell into his lap. “She knows you’re the only thing that matters to me.” Atara never confronted her about it, but she always stressed the importance of kinship. Kaliel never noticed until then how indifferent Atara was about her own relationship with Istar. Her dreamy presence was sometimes an annoyance, but it was her way of escaping the reality she lived in. She wondered what she really thought of the parable, and the potential for destruction. She rubbed her midsection while trying to find some comfort. Krishani ran his fingers through her hair idly.
“I won’t leave,” he said.
“They’ll force you to.”
She sat and tucked her knees to her chest, rocking back and forth. Krishani pulled her hair away from her neck and rubbed her shoulders. She felt his hot breath against the nape of her neck as his lips pressed against it, trying to pull her back into their reverie. He made a trail of kisses down her shoulder; the bittersweet mix of ecstasy and sorrow burned within her. She felt so different, as though she had crossed an invisible barrier and could never go back. Her thoughts drifted to the Great Oak, but with Krishani’s hands on her it seemed frivolous. Nothing was ending. This was obviously not the temptation so forewarned about. She pushed away the images of the dream, the fire in the sky. That was so unlikely too. They were safe on Avristar. As long as they didn’t leave, nothing bad could ever happen.
“Can we think of that later?” he said as his lips found her chin. He turned her face towards his and kissed her. She gave up and sank into him, knowing there was nothing sweeter than bliss.
“Mallorn,” she murmured as his lips moved against hers. She recalled the last time she had seen him, the defense training, the word he drew from her mind. She eyed the grass. “He’ll come looking for me.”
Krishani kissed her ear. “Cross that bridge when we get there.” He wrapped his arm around her torso and pulled her closer to him.
• • •
Mallorn busted the door open and hastily descended the hill towards the stables. Part of him hoped Kaliel fell asleep in the stacks of hay, but another part of him knew that wasn’t true. His gray robes dragged along the grass, picking up the morning dew. Without thinking, he tightened the tassel-tipped cord around his waist.
He reached the stables, but there was no sign of Kaliel. The horses spoke to him with their neighs and he nodded. She looked so frightened the last time he saw her. He regretted the defense exercise. How she knew about the Ferryman was none of his business. He cared more about her carelessness, that rebellious spirit that rumbled under her fragility, it set her apart from every apprentice he had ever worked with. Unlike some of the untamable apprentices, Kaliel had a reason for everything she did, though some of those reasons were still shroud in mystery. She was ruled by passion and pressure, it seemed. And she was a Flame. That would always make her unique. Umber neighed and Mallorn turned to listen to the horse’s laments.
“Who will leave her?” Umber asked.
“What do you mean?”
“She fell asleep here. When she awoke she said he would leave her. Then she took off into the forest.”
Mallorn had only known her for three moons and she seemed melancholy the entire time. She hadn’t said a word about anyone in her life.
He shook his head. No time for that; he needed to focus on where she was. He saddled up Umber, and exited through the back of the barn. They sped into a jaunt and Mallorn scanned the forest. There was something different about the energy reflected back at him, as though something else had happened. The light in his dream, it meant something, but he wasn’t sure what.
Umber diligently weaved through the trees while Mallorn continued to scan. He felt Kaliel’s energy, but when he went to approach her, Umber doubled back over paths they had trodden several times. Mallorn glanced at the sky and noticed the sun was near its midmorning point. That wasn’t good. He needed to find her; they needed to be warned. The Valtanyana would strike without notice and they would bring the Daed and an army of creatures with them. Something Mallorn didn’t want to think about, the battles in the First Era were always with the Valtanyana’s beasts. He wondered what they could have access to now even though most of those races had been destroyed.
Umber seemed frustrated as the trees grew in uneven clusters. Mallorn pulled the reins to the right, leading the horse through a narrow pass between two maples. He scanned the path again. He needed to somehow break the pattern the horse was traveling. He made a sharp left, pulling through a gap between two clusters of trees. Umber broke through the invisible protective shield that housed Kaliel. Mallorn felt the hairs on the back of his neck stand on end.
Umber paused and wended around a cluster of trees that concealed a small meadow in the midst of the forest. As they turned the corner, Mallorn saw a pair of bodies nestled together in the grass. His mouth dropped open with shock as Kaliel looked up from beside someone else. Her eyes met his as the heat of embarrassment and guilt colored her cheeks.
“Kaliel,” Mallorn snapped at her. He felt frozen on the horse.
Love?
Elvens didn’t fall in love. They were logical creatures. He closed his eyes and recalled Crestaos carrying her away in his arms. He opened his eyes, anger hitting a boiling point as Kaliel ducked her head towards the one lying next to her. He heard the mumblings of a boy.
Mallorn slipped off the horse and stalked away from the scene, unable to witness another moment of their carelessness. His hand moved from his hip to his forehead to his hip again. He couldn’t fathom this. Love wasn’t forbidden on Avristar, but why had Istar failed to mention it? It should have been impossible for an elven, but Kaliel wasn’t
only
elven. She was so much more—a Flame—which made it so much worse. He shook his head as he wondered what other pieces of the story he was missing.
He turned to see Kaliel standing beside Umber. She stroked the horse’s mane as she stared at it in wonder, as though she was seeing the lands for the first time.
“You’re angry.” Her voice didn’t waver as she spoke and it was directed more at the horse than at Mallorn.
He stared at her in disbelief. Something was different about her. He looked past her to see the boy standing in the grass. Mallorn couldn’t deny the boy had an extraordinary presence, but he had no idea who he was, and the fact that he, too, was elven only made the anger sharpen its blade.
Kaliel glanced at the boy with tenderness. She turned her attention back to Mallorn, locking eyes with his. Mallorn noticed her eyes were amethyst.
The boy stepped through the grass and stood by her side. He seemed careful not to touch her while Mallorn gawked at them.
Mallorn felt the land spinning around him. She was only a child, and she was in danger. How could she act so cavalier? He tried to find his tongue. Every time he looked at her he saw her listless body, her fate stretched before her. It was as though the shadow of the enemy stood at her side instead of the boy, who was obviously very in love with her. Mallorn couldn’t help it—the anger, the fear, the anguish made him lose control.
“Crestaos knows!” he hissed at her.
• • •
Kaliel recoiled, alarmed by his words. She never heard the name before, but she knew who Mallorn was talking about. She had seen his face, the sparking white eyes. Her stomach was a sea of nausea as she felt the Flame retreat.
She had never seen Mallorn like this. His eyes said it all: he was livid. He took a long stride towards her and grabbed her by the shoulders, pulling her away from the horse. His gaze knifed into her, conveying the thoughts he couldn’t speak out loud without wanting to shout.