Succubus Revealed (19 page)
She made no comment about that, but later, when the guys returned to the living room, she said very casually, “Seth, would you mind going upstairs to get my red cardigan? I left it on the foot of the bed.”
Seth was about to sit down—far away from me, of course—but sprang up instantly at the request. As soon as he’d disappeared up the stairs, Andrea nudged me with her elbow. I turned to her, startled, and she jerked her head toward the stairs.
Go,
she mouthed. I glanced around, saw no one was paying much attention to me, and hurried after Seth.
she mouthed. I glanced around, saw no one was paying much attention to me, and hurried after Seth.
I found him in the bedroom, staring around curiously for the sweater that most likely didn’t even exist. When he saw me in the doorway, he sighed heavily, realizing he’d been tricked.
“I don’t have time for this,” he said, attempting to move past me.
I put out my arm to block the door. “Seth, please. Just listen to me. Just for a few minutes.”
He stood there, only a few inches away, and then backed up. Since he apparently didn’t want to push past and risk touching me, he must have decided distance was better, even at the risk of being trapped in the room. “Georgina, there is nothing you can say. Nothing that can change what happened between us.”
“I know that,” I said. “I’m not going to try.”
He eyed me suspiciously. “You aren’t?”
I swallowed, all words and thoughts fading from me as I stared into his eyes. There it was—that look. That same look of hurt and utter devastation that Kyriakos had worn so many centuries ago. It was looking out at me through Seth’s eyes.
I nodded. “We need to know about your contract. We just want to know some details.”
“To help you?” he asked.
“To help both of us. From what we’ve gathered, Hell violated my contract when it wrote yours. And that makes the conditions of yours contradictory. We might be able to get them both invalidated . . . but we need to understand yours better.”
Seth leaned against the wall, eyes staring vacantly ahead as his thoughts turned inward. “I don’t even understand the details of my contract. I barely remember it. . . . I mean, I do and don’t. What went down . . . with the hypnosis . . . it’s real and it’s not.”
I started to take a step forward, wanting badly to touch him and comfort him since he was clearly distraught. Caution held me back. “You have to try. Right now, if you don’t, then you’re going to go to Hell when you die. Doesn’t matter if you become a saint before then. That contract brands your soul . . . unless, well . . . we’re not sure if there was some condition that if you and I got back together, then you’d be free. That’s what we need to know.”
“Does it matter?” he asked. “Seeing as that doesn’t look like it’s going to happen—doesn’t look like it was ever going to happen, if all those lives were any indication.”
“Well, I mean, yeah . . . it matters in that the more information we have, the better our case.”
“Can’t you just have Hugh look it up?”
I shook my head. “Not without raising attention. It’d be better if we can get the details from you.”
“Well, sorry, then. I don’t remember anything more than what I told you. And honestly? I don’t care.”
“How can you not care?” I asked incredulously. “It’s your
soul
we’re talking about!”
soul
we’re talking about!”
“I’ll take my chances,” he said.
A spark of anger permeated the sorrow that had clung to me these last couple days. “There are no ‘chances.’ It’s a done deal. Your soul belongs to Hell. Nothing’s going to change it.”
“Does it really matter? You
gave
your soul to Hell.”
gave
your soul to Hell.”
“For you!” I cried. “I did it for you. To save you. I would do it a hundred times over if I had to.”
Seth scoffed. “Why didn’t you just
not
cheat on me one time?”
not
cheat on me one time?”
“I was young, and I was stupid,” I said, amazed at how levelly I could acknowledge that. “I was scared, and I felt like you were so far away from me. Like I wasn’t part of your priorities anymore. It was all about work and music for you.”
“And you never thought about talking to me about any of that first? You know you can always bring anything up to me.”
I sighed. “To
you,
maybe. Not to Kyriakos. He . . . you . . . may have meant well but wasn’t always so easy to get through to.”
you,
maybe. Not to Kyriakos. He . . . you . . . may have meant well but wasn’t always so easy to get through to.”
“But I
am
him,” argued Seth, though he sound a little unsure. “Er, was.”
am
him,” argued Seth, though he sound a little unsure. “Er, was.”
“Yes and no,” I said. “Look, I’m no expert on reincarnation, but from what I know, even though the soul and some parts of the character are constant, there’s still, like . . . evolving taking place. You grow and change. That’s the point of reincarnation. You’re the same person, but you aren’t. You weren’t perfect back then. Hell, you aren’t now. Maybe you—Seth—can handle talking about this . . . maybe after ten lives, you’ve developed enough relationship maturity. Back then? I’m not so sure. I obviously didn’t have it either.”
“Obviously,” he repeated. His gaze held me for a long time, and this time, I couldn’t tell what he was feeling. At least there was no overt hate or anything. Either that, or he’d simply learned to conceal it. Finally, he said, “I meant it. I don’t remember the contract details. . . . Just that I would be allowed to keep finding you.”
“That’s it?” I said. “Nothing else? If there’s anything more . . . I mean, the stakes here are huge, Seth. I know you said you’d take your chances, but remember when we’re talking about your soul, we’re looking beyond the scope of one human life. We’re looking at eternity.”
“There you go again,” he said, with a small, rueful smile. “Making an argument for the sanctity of the soul, a soul you threw away.”
“And I told you before, I’d do it again.”
“So you wouldn’t have to face me and look me in the eye after what you’d done.”
“In part,” I said. “But also to save your life. To give you a chance at happiness. Because at that moment . . . that was more important than my eternity.”
Seth took a long time to answer, and I again wished I knew what was happening behind those brown eyes. Whose thoughts were stirring in there? His or Kyriakos’s? Or any of the other men I’d had turbulent romances with?
“You didn’t want to face me then,” he said at last. “But here you are. Why? To save your own soul?”
“To save both our souls,” I said.
Seth straightened up from his slouch against the wall and moved toward the door. “I can’t help you. I mean it—I don’t remember anything else. Now. If you’d please make some polite excuse to the others and leave, I’d really appreciate it.”
He came to stand in front of me in the doorway, and for a half a second, time stood still as we studied each other, only a few inches apart. A thousand feelings warred within me, powered by a thousand years’ worth of lifetimes. With a slow nod, I yielded and let him walk past me.
He didn’t look back.
Chapter 16
T
he next week was one of the longest in my life. Every moment that passed was a moment without Seth and another reminder that I’d lost my one great love.
he next week was one of the longest in my life. Every moment that passed was a moment without Seth and another reminder that I’d lost my one great love.
Even if I hadn’t quit as Santa’s helper, that job would’ve been done now anyway, so my days were made even longer by their emptiness. Hugh was over a lot that week, and sometimes he and Roman tried to cheer me up or at least distract me. Mostly, they were holed up together, working on my appeal to Hell. They occasionally consulted me on it, but Hugh had most of the info he needed and simply had to put it all together in the appropriate manner. The two of them discussed other things too, mostly having to do with Hell’s legal system in general. I didn’t entirely understand why, but Roman was very adamant about learning every detail of it. It was like he was trying to pass the bar exam or something.
I tried to preoccupy myself with packing for Las Vegas. Even with my appeal, I couldn’t count on anything changing with my current Hellish status. So, I had to go forward with life as though Vegas were definitely in my future. Packing was mindless enough, however, that it didn’t distract me so much as just provide more time for me to ruminate and agonize over being apart from Seth.
Packing also had its own pitfalls because I kept running into things that reminded me of him. The worst was when I unearthed a box of keepsakes collected from over the centuries. The most recent addition was a ring Seth had given me last Christmas, just before we broke up. It was a modern twist on a Byzantine wedding ring, decorated with dolphins and sapphires. Even when we’d gotten back together, I’d left it in the box. Little did he know that I also had—in the same box—my actual wedding ring from the fifth century. It was worn with age but hadn’t entirely lost its gleam. Looking at them both gave me a weird moment of disorientation as I tried to grasp the idea that they’d technically been given to me by the same person.
During that week, I also received a fair amount of e-mail from the Las Vegas crew. Phoebe, Bastien, Luis, and even Matthias had stayed in touch since my visit, and all seemed to have increased their excitement over my pending move. Messages I would have found so witty and touching a week ago now left a bad taste in my mouth, now that I knew the truth about the transfer. Luis was simply helping to orchestrate Hell’s grand plan to keep me and Seth apart, and I didn’t trust a single word he said. Still, he
was
a demon, and one could expect a certain amount of insincerity from him. Phoebe and especially Bastien hurt more because they were operating under the pretense of friendship. I didn’t doubt Bastien was still my friend, but everything he sent me seemed forced, since it was coming from the orders of those above him.
was
a demon, and one could expect a certain amount of insincerity from him. Phoebe and especially Bastien hurt more because they were operating under the pretense of friendship. I didn’t doubt Bastien was still my friend, but everything he sent me seemed forced, since it was coming from the orders of those above him.
Matthias was kind of a mystery. I didn’t know what role he played here, if he was just a convenient mortal they’d found to take me on or if he was in league with Hell. Many humans knowingly were, in the hopes of grandiose rewards someday. For all I knew, he could be an innocent in all this, just an ordinary guy who thought he’d lucked out in finding a dancer. Without being able to say for sure, I took no joy in his e-mails either.
Notably missing from the Las Vegas gang’s correspondence was Jamie. I’d received no friendly “Can’t wait to see you!” messages at all from him, something I suspected was also a direct result of Hell’s orders. They wouldn’t want to risk the topic of Milton again. When I mentioned this to Roman and Hugh, they told me it would be surprising if Jamie was even still in Las Vegas. If Hell saw him as a liability that might inadvertently expose the double-contract snafu, Hugh felt the odds were good they’d simply removed him to prevent me from finding him. If so, I hoped it was simply a matter of a transfer and that the imp hadn’t been punished for drunkenly revealing information he didn’t realize was dangerous.
On New Year’s Eve, Hugh and Roman told me my petition was finished. They presented it to me, a staggeringly huge stack of paper filled with legalese, and showed me where to sign. There was an air of both gravity and pride around them, like they’d just created a painstakingly crafted work of art. Considering how rare this type of event was, perhaps that wasn’t such a bad assessment.
I gave the ream back to Hugh, once I’d signed it about fifteen times. “Now what?” I asked.
“Now I take it to Mei and say you gave it to me to submit to Hell. I also claim ignorance about what this is in regard to, but the fact that it went through me tips her off that there’s a witness to it all. Not that she’d probably ‘lose it’ or anything, but . . . well, with demons, it’s best to be cautious.”
“Are they really going to believe you’re a hapless messenger ?” I asked.
Hugh crooked me a smile and gestured to the paperwork. “Well, they certainly aren’t going to believe you did this on your own. But there’s no real way to prove my involvement, and anyway, I haven’t technically done anything wrong. I’m an imp. I conduct business for Hell. That’s what this is.”
Too many days of pent-up emotion took hold of me, and I flung my arms around Hugh. “Thank you,” I said. “Thank you so much.”
It was all kind of awkward since he was trying to juggle the papers, but he still managed to pat me on the back. “It’s nothing, sweetie,” he said, seeming a bit flustered. “I just hope it actually accomplishes something.”
I stepped back and attempted to get myself under control. “How will we know if it does?”
“When you’re summoned to Hell,” he said.
“Oh.” My heart lurched with fear. “I actually . . . actually have to go there?”
Roman leaned against the wall and crossed his arms. “How else do you think this is going to get resolved?”
“I’d kind of just hoped they’d send me a letter,” I said. “You know, like a college acceptance.”
Hugh snorted. “Afraid not. If they respond to it, they’ll summon you to Hell and hold a hearing to examine the contract, your complaints, and whatever evidence either side can muster.”
I wrapped my arms around myself, trying to picture what that hearing would be like. “I’ve never been to Hell. Have either of you?”
They shook their heads, which wasn’t a surprise. Lesser immortals were recruited on Earth, where they then served. We had no reason to visit the realm of our employers, not even an imp like Hugh. Roman, as a nephilim, was on Heaven and Hell’s hit list. Walking into Hell would be like showing up in a lion’s den and presenting yourself on a platter.
“I always kind of pictured Hell as a cross between waiting in line at the DMV and watching a marathon of
Perfect Strangers,
” remarked Hugh.
Perfect Strangers,
” remarked Hugh.
Roman shot him a sharp look. “What’s wrong with that show?”
Overcome, I hugged Hugh again and then Roman. “Thanks, you guys. I mean it. I owe you . . . more than I can ever pay back.”
“Just win,” said Roman fiercely. “That’s all the payback I need.”
Hugh put the papers into his briefcase and slipped on his coat. “I’m going to get these over to Mei now, then head off to a party and drink away the memories of wading through all that legalese.”
“You’re going to Peter’s?” I asked. Unsurprisingly, our vampire friend was holding a shindig to ring in the New Year.
“Nah,” said Hugh. “Not much chance of getting laid there. I’m going to a party one of my nurses is hosting.”
We wished him a happy new year and bid him farewell. As soon as he was gone, Roman turned to me. “What about you?” he asked. “Are you going to Peter’s?”
I knew Peter was counting on it, but it was hard to make myself feel like celebrating. “No. I’m not in the mood. Besides, I’m not sure I want to risk running into Jerome since I’m sure Mei’s going to tell him about the appeal. I’ll just keep packing.”
“Come on,” Roman said. “You can’t just sit around tonight. It’s a new year . . . new opportunities. Maybe even the chance to break free of Hell.”
I nodded, though it was still hard for me to imagine what “breaking free” would even look like. It was something we kept talking about, but I really couldn’t
feel
it yet. And even though I’d talked a good talk to Seth about how the integrity of the soul and eternity were so much more important than any earthly concerns, it all seemed lackluster without him in my life. “I know,” I told Roman. “But any celebrating I do is going to be forced. If I’m going to be unhappy, I’d rather do it in a place where I feel comfortable.”
feel
it yet. And even though I’d talked a good talk to Seth about how the integrity of the soul and eternity were so much more important than any earthly concerns, it all seemed lackluster without him in my life. “I know,” I told Roman. “But any celebrating I do is going to be forced. If I’m going to be unhappy, I’d rather do it in a place where I feel comfortable.”
He glanced at the clock. “Let’s at least go out to dinner. Dress up and get a good meal. Then we’ll come back and watch all the New Year’s shows.”
I didn’t have much of an appetite but suspected if I said no, Roman would consign himself to the same self-imprisonment as me. I didn’t want his night ruined because of me, especially after everything he’d done this week. One problem presented itself.
“It’s almost five,” I said. “We’ll never get in anywhere on such short notice. Unless we want to dress up for Taco Bell. Which I’m actually not averse to.”
Roman was already reaching for his cell phone. “I know someone who’s a chef at this Italian place in Green Lake. We’ll get a table.”
Sure enough. One mysterious phone call, and we were on our way an hour later. I hadn’t been up for elaborate styling and simply shape-shifted myself into New Year’s finery, with an off-the-shoulder satin dress and my hair cascading in perfect waves. Roman had warned me “no black,” so the dress was dark purple, which still seemed appropriate for my mood. I paired it with a glittering necklace of white gold and amethysts that had been my Secret Santa gift to myself. I had great taste.
“Have you made any moves to put your condo on the market?” asked Roman as he drove us through the city. “Contacted a real estate agent?”
I gazed out at the bright lights of the downtown skyline. This time of year, darkness came early. “No. I need to. Unless . . .” I glanced over at him. “Do you want to keep staying there? I’ll keep it and rent if you want.”
He shook his head, a wry smile playing over his lips. “No. It wouldn’t be the same without you and those furballs. I’ll get another place. Sell it or rent it to someone else.”
“Easier to sell,” I mused. “Well, in theory. But I’m not concerned with profit, and it saves the hassle of screening and dealing with—” I stopped as a startling thought suddenly came to me. “Hey. Do we have time for a, oh, fifteen-minute stop? Will your friend get rid of our table?”
“Not if I call. Where do you need to go?”
“The U District. Seth’s place. Don’t worry,” I added, seeing his look of alarm. “I’m not going to do anything crazy or lovestruck. I’m not even going to see Seth. Please? Just a quick stop?”
Roman concurred, though his expression said this was against his better judgment. I almost told him his fears were unfounded because I was only going to actually stop if Margaret was home and Seth wasn’t. The odds against that possibility seemed slim, particularly with the way my luck tended to run.
The universe apparently owed me a favor because when we reached Seth’s condo, I saw her car there but not his. A light inside gave me hope that they hadn’t just all carpooled off together.
“Do you need me to come in?” asked Roman, as he pulled into my parking spot.
“No, but thanks. I’ll be right back.”
I left the car and walked up to the door, hoping some wacky happenstance wouldn’t actually put me face to face with Seth. Not that I wouldn’t have loved to see him. God, I missed him so, so much. But I knew no good could come of an encounter between us. I rang the bell and waited anxiously. A few moments later, Margaret answered.
“Georgina,” she said, clearly surprised. “What are you doing here?” She took in my appearance. “Are you supposed to meet Seth?”
“No . . . can I come in for a minute? I’ll be fast, I promise.” She had on a coat, making me think she’d been about to leave. Either that or she was trying to save Seth money on his heating bills.
She gestured me inside and shut the door. “I was about to go to Terry’s. Seth’s already there.” I didn’t bother asking where Ian was. He probably celebrated New Year’s on January third or something, just to be contrary. “You haven’t been around in a while.”
I wondered what Seth had told his family about us, if he’d even told them anything at all. Maybe he was just going to say nothing until one of them noticed my absence.
“Ah, well,” I said. “Seth and I are having a disagreement.”
She clucked her tongue disapprovingly. “You two need to sit down and fix it then.”
How I wished it was that easy. I forced a neutral smile. “We’ll see,” I said. “But the thing is . . . I may be moving. No, I
am
moving. I have a new job . . . and I was wondering if you’d like to stay in my condo when I leave. I remember you saying you didn’t want to impose on Seth’s space but that you wished you could stick around more to help. Well, now you can. You can have your own place. Mine.”
am
moving. I have a new job . . . and I was wondering if you’d like to stay in my condo when I leave. I remember you saying you didn’t want to impose on Seth’s space but that you wished you could stick around more to help. Well, now you can. You can have your own place. Mine.”
“I can’t afford to keep my place in Chicago and pay rent somewhere here, though,” she said sadly. “That’s been the problem.”
“You don’t have to pay rent,” I said. “You can stay there for free.”
She eyed me curiously. “How will you afford your mortgage?”
Yes, how indeed would a poor retail-bound girl like me be able to swing that? “The condo’s paid off,” I explained. Let her think it was passed down through the family or something. “And my new job pays well. Look, I really don’t mind you staying. It’d be worth it to me to know that the girls have you close by to help. I mean, they’re going to need a strong woman around, right?”
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