Star Wars Journal - The Fight for Justice by Luke Skywalker (5 page)

Ben seemed to like him right away, and they started negotiating.

Early on I gathered a few things about Captain Solo. First, he and Chewie are the only crew of the ship. Second, Solo is a smuggler. I don’t have much of a problem with that; I guess some goods are essential to almost all known worlds, and the Empire imposes some pretty outrageous taxes. Most people don’t consider smugglers to be serious criminals, but they’re generally reckoned to be pretty dangerous customers. They’re avoided for the most part. It’s a profession that attracts people with big egos, who take big chances and who reap big profits…

Or death.

The Imperials don’t like their taxes being avoided, and they hunt out spice smugglers. Nobody in a place like this cantina would ever turn in a spice runner, but with all the stormtroopers in the city, one whiff of any contraband spice and Solo could be fried in a second. Still, you don’t get to be very old in the spice trade if you’re not fast on your feet and faster with your wits. Solo looked old enough to be both of these.

Luckily, Solo didn’t much care that the Imperials were after us; it sort of put us on equal footing—as renegades. The problem was, he wanted a spice profit for a flight to Alderaan. Ten thousand credits!

That was
way
out of our league, and Ben knew it. But it didn’t seem to bother him. He made a counteroffer of two thousand upfront, and another fifteen at Alderaan. He was obviously planning to get it from the princess, which made sense. I mean, she’s a princess, right? She’s bound to have more money than even she can spend. Of course, we still had to come up with two thousand. I had about thirty in my pockets, and Ben didn’t have a single coin. He said he always managed to get along without any. I can’t see how, myself, but I’m starting to learn that Ben’s pretty different from most people.

We left Solo and Chewie at the cantina and headed over to a used speeder lot with Artoo and Threepio. As usual, the dealer tried to cut us down in price, and Ben’s use of the Force saved us again. We needed two thousand for Captain Solo, and that’s what Ben got us. I’m sure the dealer’s going to wonder why he was so generous when he recovers, but he can still sell the landspeeder at a profit, so we didn’t feel too badly.

Then we headed for the docking bay where Solo has his ship. In the cantina, he told us how fast it was, and how trim, and how… well, pretty much what a wonder it was. I should have known better than to believe everything he said, of course. When I saw the
Falcon
, I could tell it was a piece of junk.

It was worn down, rebuilt, and jury-rigged. You could see the weld marks, the mismatched pieces, the forced-together technology. It looked like one serious landing would shake the ship to pieces. But Ben only smiled, like this was exactly what he’d expected. I can’t figure him out sometimes. I was sure we were being conned.

Then Solo and the Wookiee appeared, and we headed for the ship for takeoff. That’s when the stormtroopers took us by surprise.

Maybe the ones Ben had fooled had come to their senses. Maybe they had sniffed the spices. Maybe they were just plain lucky and were checking out the spaceport on the off chance of finding their droids skipping the planet. Whatever the reason, they saw us and started firing.

I have to hand it to Solo and Chewie—they certainly know what to do when blasters are firing. They had us all aboard, the door locked, and the
Falcon
powered before the Imperials even managed to get close to us. Ben and I strapped in, Artoo and Threepio plugged in, and Solo and Chewie took us up faster than even I imagined possible.

But that didn’t get us out of trouble. There were Imperial cruisers in orbit—waiting for us.

This was the first time I’d ever been off Tatooine, but I didn’t get the chance to enjoy it because the
Falcon
was dodging shots. Everything was exploding all around us, and we were getting thrown around like crazy. Artificial gravity has its drawbacks, and one is that it takes a few microseconds to switch back and forth when the ship’s on violent maneuvers. Solo must have been at least half the pilot he claimed to be, because he dodged the fighters and took us to lightspeed.

And I was too shaken up to really appreciate it. But the change was still absolutely incredible. The universe goes all weird and then—
wham!
Lightspeed, and everything’s still, like you’re not moving.

Time in lightspeed isn’t really like time in the rest of the universe. There, time ticks away on chronos and things happen. Once you break the light barrier, though, it’s not that simple. I don’t understand the physics very well—I’m not sure anyone does, really—but you can work out exactly how far and how long you need to go in which direction to get you to where you’re going.

I just hoped that Solo or Chewie could plot a course the way they could dodge Imperial cruisers. If they could, everything would be fine.

All my life, I’ve longed for something to happen to me. Something important. And now that it has, I’m not sure how to handle it. I’m glad to be off Tatooine. But I still haven’t seen anything of the stars, or the galaxy at large. And, to be honest, I’m really just a passenger along for the ride. Ben says he needs my help, but I haven’t been much help so far. He had to save me in the cantina, and it’s Solo and Chewie who got us off Tatooine.

Maybe I’ll have something to do soon, other than practice trying to use the Force. Not that this isn’t a great challenge. Ben has already taught me the basics, like the proper grip and ready position. I never realized how important body positioning is. The idea is to start with just the right stance, so you’re immediately ready for attack or defense. And to avoid standing with your feet too wide apart, which kills your speed and agility. As Ben says, you must feel your center of balance.

My training consists of lots of drills. Mostly using my lightsaber against a seeker robot. The robot sends out laser bolts and I have to ward them off—which is no easy feat. And when I’m done with the drills, I’m instructed to visualize them!

Sometimes Ben stands behind me and guides me as I move from the first to the fourth defensive postures. As I listen to Ben’s voice, I try to empty my thoughts of everything, to use wide circular motions, fluid and confident, and to parry with a
full
movement. By focusing on the pattern of the drill, I’m supposed to tune the world out. That’s the goal: to let go of all rational thought and allow the Force to do the work.

Unfortunately, it feels like
I’m
doing all the work. So, to help me get the hang of it, Ben had me use my lightsaber—while blindfolded! I had to just let go and feel. And guess what? I really sensed something. Some sort of energy. It was incredible! It was almost as though I could see in my mind’s eye which way to move. Maybe Ben’s right and I do have some aptitude for the Force—like my father had.

I hope so. I don’t want to be in some great quest and great adventure and end up just being a passenger. I want to be able to do my share.

Just when I thought things couldn’t get any worse, they’ve really plummeted.

Ben’s dead.

I’m still trying to sort out my thoughts and feelings. I mean, I’d only known Ben for a day, really. Yet I miss him even more than I miss my aunt and uncle… and I spent my life with them.

There was just something so special, so alive about Ben. Being around him was like being around the father I had never had… but always dreamed about.

And now he’s gone.

Ben was teaching me so much about the Force, and without him, I don’t know if I’ll ever hear about it again. So I’d better record what I can remember, while it’s still fresh in my mind.

If Ben was the last Jedi, then I’ll never become one. But I know what I have learned from Ben has made a huge difference in my life. I can feel the power around me and within me. I know his teachings are important enough to hold on to. And pass along.

Ben and I spoke a lot about the Force—the energy force created by all living things. Ben called it “an aura that at once controls and obeys,” although he said no one, not even the Jedi Masters or scientists, could find a true definition for it. I guess that’s because it’s
in
one’s mind as much as outside of it. It’s not something you can put your finger on to control and study. You have to believe in its power to access its power.

Anyway, if this seems confusing, that’s okay. Nobody understands it right away. Ben said that learning the Force requires great patience—that it’s a lifelong education. He seemed to think that even at his age and level of mastery, he was still learning.

Once, Ben said, the Jedi-in-training would spend a great deal of time contemplating and opening themselves gradually to the Force. But that’s when the Jedi were the leaders of the galaxy and the keepers of the peace. Things have changed. There’s no time for that now. Ben wanted me to train in a faster way. A more active, hands-on approach. Still, the essential teachings are as they always were. Learn to trust the Force. Learn to open up the senses and
feel
the Force.

Sometimes I think I can do this. But other times I’m not so sure. Ben told me to trust my feelings and to let go of trying to control myself. There are times when I have to divorce my actions from conscious control. I’m not exactly sure when to do this, but Ben said I’ll know when the time comes.

The workings of the Force aren’t always direct, but they’re strong. Because of it, Ben knew I was coming and would need his help when the Sand People struck. Somehow, if you’re open, the Force gives you information. Like knowing when someone is following you without actually seeing anyone. It’s a lot like having a sixth sense, really.

It can also help you influence the weak-minded, or those accustomed to obeying orders, like the stormtroopers. Ben demonstrated this numerous times. He would say something with such total confidence that others would believe anything he said—even
repeat
what he had said. It was unbelievable! It was like Ben hypnotized them.

I think one of the hardest lessons for me is not to be fooled by appearances. Ben looked like a shabby old hermit, but that wasn’t the truth. The
Falcon
looks like a pile of junk, but that’s not the truth, either. I have to confess, if my friends were around, I would have felt ashamed of Ben and the
Falcon
upon first glance. But I’m learning that appearances don’t count for much. Imperial troops look smart and impressive, but at heart they’re just cowards and bullies.

Ben told me that the Force can accomplish miracles. That anything is possible when you are open to the Force and you let it flow through you. That’s how I’m supposed to use my lightsaber—let it
flow
from me. It’s all about letting yourself go and trusting the Force.

Of course, very few men recognize or feel the Force. And even fewer can use it. But a Jedi feels the Force, just like any other physical object. A Jedi can harness its power.

One of the most important things Ben taught me is that if one man suffers, all men suffer. If evil is not stopped, it will rule over
all
men one day—whether they’ve opposed it or ignored it. And so, with Ben’s teachings under my belt, I mark my next challenge: to fight for justice against evil and tyranny.

I’ve always been afraid that I’d be stuck on a farm my whole life. But that’s no longer the case. For one thing, the farm’s gone. For another, I can feel a difference inside me. Maybe it’s the Force. Maybe it’s just everything I’ve been through. But I’m not the same Luke Skywalker I was just a few days ago.

It’s so bizarre. Not much has happened in my life that’s worth remembering. And yet, in just two days, everything’s completely changed. I found a living link to my father, and lost him. And I even managed to rescue a princess on the way.

I’d better do this the way I’ve been doing everything, and that’s to try to tell it in order, and make some sense out of what happened. So here goes…

On the way to Alderaan, I kept busy with my exercises—especially deflecting the laserbolts from the seeker. I was excited to learn and was moving at an exhausting rate. But I couldn’t stop thinking about my aunt and uncle. What happened to them was so sick. So painful. At the time I didn’t realize how much my anger was building. Or that I should watch out for something like that. Most people would have told me I deserved to be upset, and that it was perfectly normal to feel this way.

But Ben warned me how easy and natural it could be to turn to anger, fear, and aggression—the dark side of the Force. He could see the anger in me, and the revenge I wanted on the Empire and Darth Vader for what they’d done to my family. Ben told me that such emotions are very strong, but that they tap into the dark side of the Force. And by entering the dark side, you strengthen its hold on the evil in yourself. “If you give in to those feelings,” he promised me, “then you give in to the dark side. You will become like Darth Vader.”

That’s the scary thought; I wouldn’t want to end up like that. But, at the same time, I don’t know how I’ll ever be able to give up my anger and desire for revenge. Vader and the others
must
pay for what they’ve done. I don’t know if Ben really understood what he was asking of me. He said that he did, that he had to give up his own quest for vengeance, too. I guess he meant when Vader killed my father. I know that upset Ben a lot.

So what do I do? I don’t want to end up seduced by the dark side. But I want to see Vader pay for his crimes. If the Force is with me, Ben said the correct path will become clear. I really hope so, because I could use a little clarity right now.

As I was thinking about this, Ben gave a cry and almost collapsed.

He assured me he was all right, but that he’d felt a great disturbance in the Force. Like a billion voices all crying out at once. He said he’d never felt anything like it before, and I could see that it bothered him. He didn’t know what had caused it.

I was afraid that the strain of everything was getting to be too much for him. I didn’t know how old Ben was, but he certainly wasn’t used to all of this activity anymore.