Spark (9 page)

My heart sinks heavily in my chest. No wonder he’s kept a low profile all these years. I’ve always seen him as confident, but shy when it came to girls. It explains why he’d never put himself out there. It tugs at my heart knowing that he’s been dealing with this for so long without anyone to talk to besides his doctor. I wish he’d said something sooner, but then again, it’s a tough conversation to have. I can understand why he left it until now to tell me.

“I’m sorry, Jon,” I say softly. I place my hand on his arm, and rub it in a comforting gesture. “You know, this whole sex thing is new to me too.”
I hope I don’t have to say the V word
.

“Yeah, I know,” he says, and nods. He brushes the hair from my face, and traces along my jaw with his finger. “Believe me, it’s on my mind.”

“I’m sorry if I went too far.”

He sighs. “Don’t be.” He looks away, and focuses on the bedroom door. An uncomfortable silence fills the room, as he stares ahead.

“So, what’s this new treatment?” I ask.

“The latest approach the doctor wants to try is injection therapy, but I fucking hate needles.”
It must be serious, then.

“Yeah, I hate them too. So, are you supposed to jab yourself in the arm or the leg?”

He looks into my eyes and slowly shakes his head. “Nope.” Jon cringes.

“Where then?”

Jon glimpses at his crutch, and back at me.
Shit—there.

“Oh.” I shudder at the thought.

“Not only is it expensive, but you can’t do it too often as it can bruise, and have some nasty side-effects. There’s no guarantee, either, that it will work.”

“Oh.” I don’t know what else to say.

Jon gets out of bed, and pulls on a T-shirt. “Can you get me one too, please?” I ask. Being practically naked now seems wrong. He passes me one, and I slip it on and snuggle under the covers with him, spooning against his back. I try not to touch him anywhere that may excite him. It may take me a while to work out where that is.

“I’m glad you told me,” I say, and softly kiss the nape of his neck. What else can I say? I have to be so delicate for fear of crushing him. It must have been so hard for him to tell me, but I don’t want to promise him anything. I’m still working out how I feel; if I can love him, more than I do as my best friend. I won’t lie. Jon’s problem has definitely thrown a spanner in the works.
One giant mother-fucking spanner.

“Night, Eevie.” He turns and kisses me on the forehead, and rolls back.

“Night.”

Within minutes, his breathing is heavier, and his body relaxes. He finds sleep. Me? I’m wide
fucking
awake.

A virgin, and a chronic premature ejaculator. You wouldn’t read about it. They didn’t talk about
this
in
Cosmo
. In fact, nothing could have prepared me for this. Right now, my sex-life is non-existent. Sex with Jon will be a challenge, but more than that, it will be calculated and clinical. Shouldn’t my first time be at the very least uncomplicated? If we do it without the injections, I will barely be able to touch him. There will be no foreplay, and once he’s inside me—if he makes it that far—it’ll be over as soon as it’s begun. I breathe out deeply, trying to talk myself into sleep.
What have I gotten myself into?

Going to the next level is a big step for me, but now I understand it’s just as big a step for him. I know that he loves me—he doesn’t have to say it, it’s written all over his face. If I sleep with him there will be no turning back. If we do and then break up, it would crush him. It would break his precious heart. He doesn’t deserve that. I really should have thought this through before.

What am I supposed to do?

****

The next day, Crystal and I go grocery shopping. We buy a lot more stuff than we usually would. Apart from the normal staples, we get a few things to liven up the apartment. When we’re done, Crystal parks her car on the street so we can race the bags upstairs. We get out, and start unloading.

I hear the other car before I see it. Up the street, a sleek, black Holden Ute, with a dirt bike on the back, swerves around the bend and comes to a quick stop behind us. It startles me with how close it gets.

I squint to see inside the tinted windows. The roar of the engine ceases, and the car door opens. A guy gets out, and runs his fingers through his wild brown hair, which is longer on top than the sides.

My eyes scan over his black T-shirt, dark blue jeans streaked with grease, and dusty work boots. I study his face as he moves closer. Chiselled features, but with a certain softness and tanned golden skin. His beautiful face has my fingers itching to run over every inch of dark stubble. He’s athletic, unshaven, and totally yum. The trifecta.

He stares directly at me with the most piercing pale blue eyes I have
ever
seen.
Holy crap
. I am instantly jealous of his dark eyelashes and even darker eyebrows, one bearing a scar, which frame his eyes. He smiles at me, dazzling me with his perfect teeth and luscious lips. I hope my jaw is not hanging out of my head.

“Hey, Crystal. How you goin’?” he asks as he sits on the bonnet of his car, folding his arms. My eyes are drawn to his muscular arms and chest, and wander down his torso. I could guarantee there is a
perfect
set of abs underneath that well-fitting T-shirt
.
His jeans sit just right on his hips, too. I have to stop my roving eyes from going any lower.

My God, what’s wrong with me?
While he waits for Crystal’s reply, his eyes pin me in place. It’s completely unnerving.

“Good thanks. What are you doing here?” Crystal responds, interrupting my thoughts, which were getting dirtier by the second.
Is
my face bright red?
It feels hot enough to fry an egg on. Whoever he is, I hope he doesn’t notice. He turns his head towards Crystal.

“Rob told me to drop in on my way home. I’ve got a part for his bike.” He stares at me again, giving me a cheeky smirk. I don’t know what to make of it. My heart rate spikes as a wave of butterflies materialise in my stomach.

“He should be here soon. Do you want me to take it, or do you wanna come in and wait?” Crystal asks, noticing his eyes locked on mine. “Oh, sorry,” Crystals says. “You guys haven’t met. Aidan, this is Genevieve.”
Why did she have to use my full name?

This must be the guy she told me about. The one that Rob has practically been in love with since starting to ride dirt bikes. Aidan extends his arm, and I shake his warm hand, not breaking eye contact. I can’t help it. My eyes are glued.

“Hi,” I say shyly.

“Hey. Nice to meet you, Genevieve.”

“Please … call me Eevie.” I say, and smile.

“Eevie, then,” he says in a deep head-swirling voice, and my God, my name has
never
sounded so sexy.
Swoon!
“Here, let me give you girls a hand with these bags.”
How thoughtful
.

Aidan picks up a couple of heavy bags, and Crystal and I take what we can. We carry them over to the building, and Crystal unlocks the entry door, holding it open for us.

Aidan heads up the stairs first. I take the opportunity to unsuspectingly watch this mysterious, ridiculously good-looking stranger as he walks a few steps in front. I turn to Crystal and mouth
oh my God
to her, trying not to get caught as he reaches the next landing. Crystal flashes me a wide grin before opening the door to our apartment. We dump the bags on the kitchen bench, and I head back to the front door and open it.

“I’ll grab some more,” I say.

“I’ll help,” Aidan says, standing close behind me. Any closer, we’d be touching. He smiles.
That
is what I call a smile …
Come on legs, move!
“We can manage the rest Crystal,” Aidan says looking back at her.

I take my time down the stairs while Aidan catches up. I swear I can feel his eyes on me the whole time. The thud of his work boots echo throughout the stairwell, becoming louder as we reach the foyer. As I bend down to put the wedge under the main door, so we don’t have to be buzzed back in, he is right behind me, holding it open. The hairs on the back of my neck stiffen, and for a moment I have to really think about what I’m supposed to be doing. Like, putting one foot in front of the other. For someone I have just met and barely said two words to, Aidan has my heart pounding harder, and butterflies bouncing around my stomach like they’re on speed.

We walk to the car in silence, but there is this tension between us. It’s not uncomfortable, it’s more like, I don’t know … excitement? I wonder if he notices it, too.

I gather a couple of bags, and Aidan takes the last two. A few apples have come loose, and are right up the back. I move in to reach them, and he puts his arm in front of me to stop me.

“I’ll get those.” He puts his bags on one arm, and leans right in to reach the stray fruit. As he does, I can’t take my eyes off the muscular lines of his back,
or
that toned-to-perfection arse beneath those tight jeans. I picture running my hand through his hair, down his neck, the middle of his back, and squeezing said toned arse.

Where the hell did that come from
? I need to get a grip, and not of him.

I close the boot of the car, and we walk over to the building.

“After you,” he says politely, and I walk in front. I can sense him grinning at me … that same cheeky smirk he had on his face when he was sitting on the bonnet of his car. I’m not sure if he’s being a gentleman, letting me walk up the stairs first, or if he’s checking me out.

His eyes flick from my waist to meet my eyes at each landing on the way up, the smirk on his face giving away what I suspected. I am
so
glad I have some decent jeans on … how embarrassing if I was wearing my usual Sunday daggy track-pants.

Crystal waits with the door open, and smiles as we enter the apartment. “You guys took your time,” she says in jest.

I frown at her, and give her a
what’s-that-supposed-to-mean
glare as I walk past
.
I decide not to say anything.

“Do you wanna drink, Aidan?” Crystal asks, as he puts the remaining bags in the kitchen. “I think we’ve got some Coronas.”

“Yeah, thanks. I’d better hang around and talk Rob through how to install this part. He’ll have no clue, otherwise.” Aidan moves into the lounge area, and looks around the apartment.

“Beer, Eevie?” Crystal asks, as she opens the fridge.

“No thanks. I’m off for a run. I’ll see how I feel when I get back.”

“Are you girls happy with the new place?” Aidan asks, as Crystal hands him a beer.

“Yeah, it’s great,” we both answer at the same time.

“I’d better get changed,” I say to Crystal as she walks into the kitchen.

As I turn to go to my room, I find Aidan leaning against the doorframe. He takes a long swig of his beer. “Are you sure I can’t tempt you to stay?” Aidan asks, raising an eyebrow, drawing my attention once again to that scar. My eyes drift over his chest, and I swallow … hard.
Tempt me. I’m sure he would have no trouble.
Who is this guy?

I look him directly in the eye. He’d only have to blink those baby blues to have women crumbling at his feet. I’ve read all too well about boys like him. Love ‘em and leave ‘em.

“I won’t be long,” I say, giving a reassuring smile. This tension, excitement, whatever it is between us, is almost too much. The sexiness dripping off him has me desperate for air. The longer I spend around him, the more I need to get out.

I stalk into my bedroom to get changed. I lean back against the closed door, taking in a long deep breath. A run is
exactly
what I need. I pull out of my wardrobe a black, cropped sports top, and black Lycra shorts. I look in the full-length mirrored doors of my wardrobe once dressed, and grin at the prospect of giving Aidan a flash of skin—my toned stomach, legs, and arms. My cheeks have a nice flush to them, which I’m pretty sure he’s responsible for. I sweep my hair up in a ponytail, pick up my iPod, and grab my sneakers. As I walk into the lounge room, Aidan and Crystal are sitting at the dining table, enjoying their beers.

“No Rob yet?” I ask, as I pull out a chair at the other end of the dining table. I slip on my sneakers and put a foot on the seat, and slowly tie up my laces. Aidan is frozen, staring in my direction. It’s as if he was about to take a sip of beer, but the bottle is suspended in mid-air. He’s definitely checking me out now.

“He just sent me a text. He’s on his way,” Crystal replies. I change feet on the dining chair and tie the other shoe, trying very hard to hold in a smile. I select my latest running playlist, and put the iPod in my armband.

“Well, enjoy your beer. I’ll be back soon.” I smile at both of them.

“Bye.” Aidan and Crystal respond one after the other. Aidan’s eyes track me to the door.

Once I’m in the stairwell, and the door closes behind me, I muster some energy and run down the steps to the foyer. I press play on my iPod and am hit with the loud sounds of Rage Against the Machine—the song, “Killing in the name of”. This is old-school, and one of my favourite running tracks. It is serious music for a serious workout.

I start on my usual running path, down by Lake Burley-Griffin, and then in and around the many apartment blocks throughout Kingston. It’s easy for my mind to get lost as I race through the many streets lined with giant oak trees. I seem to be moving faster than normal—I’m pretty damn sure I have Aidan to thank for that.

I re-live our brief encounter. I picture those pale blue eyes, the dreamy hair, the stubble on his face, and the T-shirt and jeans that hugged his toned body.
Damn
. I’m in another world, clearly, as I almost cross one of the roads without looking. Luckily, the car is far enough away that it doesn’t have to brake.

All of a sudden, I am hit with a pang of guilt.

Oh God, Jon.

Now I’m angry with myself. How can I be feeling like this when I have a boyfriend? I shouldn’t be fantasising about someone I don’t even know. It’s not fair to Jon. I stop running, and rest my hands on my knees to catch my breath.
Jon. Yes, Jon, your boyfriend
. I’d better ring him later.