Southern Discomfort (5 page)

“I
wouldn't do anything. I worried about what I won't do.”

“Darling,
what exactly are you worried about?”

“What
if I get so shy, that I can't talk again?” Her forehead wrinkled
up.

“That
wouldn't embarrass me, darling. Just hold onto my hand. I'll be there
for you. If you don't talk this week than maybe you will next week.
Don't worry. Let's get ready for church.” He jumped out of bed and
went to the wardrobe.

She
looked at his body he was so sleek and lean like a tiger on the
prowl. She longed to pet him. She pushed those thoughts to the side
and also got up and went to her trunk. She had to make a good
impression on the town's people. She really didn't want to embarrass
him.

He
pulled out his Sunday suit. It had been washed and ironed. He looked
down at her kneeling on the floor. Had she done that? “Emily you
can hang your things in the wardrobe too. You don't need to be living
out of your trunk.”

“Thank
you, Nathaniel.” She laid her Sunday things out on the bed.

He
realized that she wouldn't have ever done it if he hadn't offered. He
was learning things about his little wife. This trait of hers would
keep him on his toes. He would have to anticipate what she needed.
She wouldn't tell him. He watched her washing herself quickly so he
wouldn't have to wait.

When
she was finished she stepped aside so he could have his turn. She sat
on the bed and brushed her long hair.

He had
to remind himself that now wasn't the time but he had never seen
anything more enticing than his naked wife, sitting on his side of
the bed brushing that long hair of hers.

She
finished and laid her brush back down, careful not to touch him. She
went around to her side of the bed and started getting dressed. When
she was finished, she smoothed her dress down with her hands and
looked up to see if he approved.

“How
do I look?”

Nathaniel
was standing in front of the little mirror he had hanging on the wall
as he tied his tie. He turned to look at her. He somehow forgot how
pretty she was but when he looked at her again he could see it. “You
are the prettiest thing I have ever seen.”

She
blushed and looked at her feet. He was always saying that, she
thought, did he really mean it?

He
reached for her hand again. He really liked holding her hand. It just
fit into his so perfectly. She trusted him to take care of her. He
brought her down to breakfast. They were the first ones down.

Emily
knew it was her job to get food on the table for her husband but her
aunt had warned her not to cross the other women in the house. “What
would you like to eat?”

Nathaniel
smiled at her, wondering if she could even cook? He doubted it. She
seemed so nervous. “I'll help you.” He found a loaf a bread and
started cutting while she lighted a fire in the stove.

Good
she had already learned how to do that.

“Should
we toast the bread?” she asked as she got out a pan.

“Sure.”
They had toast every morning. She got out the sharpest knife and
carefully cut the ham. She was cutting slices when he looked at her.
“I'll set the table.”

“Thank
you.” She carefully laid the ham in the pan. Five pieces fit
perfectly into the large frying pan.

The
room smelt liked breakfast should, Nathaniel thought. He stood to the
side and watched her work. She seemed to know exactly what she was
doing. She was always surprising him.

The
others came down as she added eggs to the pan where the ham had been.

Nathaniel
counted ten eggs. Five pieces of ham and ten eggs. That wasn't
enough. He thought back to what she had eaten since she had been
here. It really wasn't much. He said his good morning to the others
and sat down at the table with the men. They discussed what work
needed to be done this week but Nathaniel thought that he would have
to be having a talk with his wife. Something was wrong. Why wasn't
she eating enough?

Charles
went to hitch up the horses while the women got their prayer books.
Emily had a very beautiful one done up in green leather to match her
dress. It even had her name on it. Well, her old name. She was no
longer a Stuart. Now she was a Tate. He was feeling so possessive of
her.

He
helped the women into the carriage and then got in himself to sit
next to his wife. Normally, he rode alongside of the carriage on his
horse but now he didn't have to. As a married man he got to sit in
with the women and hold Emily's hand.

He
thought about the lone piece of toast she had eaten for breakfast. He
would have a private word with her about her eating habits.

The
carriage stopped and Nathaniel jumped down to help the ladies down.
Emily had remained sitting. He had hoped that she would come out
last. He didn't want to have to let go of her.

Word
must have gotten out because the whole town seemed to want to go to
church this morning.

She
took a deep breath and went to Nathaniel's waiting hand. There were
so many people here and they were all looking at her. Nathaniel was
holding her close to him, but still she felt scared.

The
preacher came forward to them and ushered them into the church.
Nathaniel felt Emily sigh relieved. The preacher led them to the
first pew. Edward and Katie sat at the aisle, showing that he was the
head of the family. The church filled quickly. Everyone was staring
at Emily's back. Nathaniel felt her shaking again. The shaking
stopped as the service started.

The
congregation all stood to sing the first song. Emily's voice could be
heard above all others. Most of the town folk had stopped singing
when they heard her. She had a fine voice. Nathaniel had yet another
reason to be proud of her. He sang along, extra loud, so she wouldn't
get scared and stop singing. When the song was over she looked over
at him and smiled.

He
hoped the whole room saw her smiling at him that way. He wanted to
get up in front of everyone and say that she was his and just his but
he would say just that in his own gentlemen's way.

The
preacher welcomed everyone to church and mentioned how happy he was
that so many of them appeared here today.

After
a light laugh he looked over at Emily and Nathaniel. “As you all
seem to know, our Nathaniel took a wife this week. Emily welcome to
our church. Why don't you two stand up so we can congratulate the
newlyweds.”

Emily's
hand squeezed Nathaniel's hand tightly as they stood and faced the
congregation.

A
collective awe came from the town's men when they saw Emily.
Nathaniel laid his arm around her and gave the men a very unchristian
look. They sat back down and Emily concentrated on the service. When
it was time to sing the next song no one sang except Emily and
Nathaniel. The others just listened to them. Nathaniel's family also
began singing, once they realized that the whole congregation was
also listening to her.

After
a bit the others sang too. The preacher stood in front of his flock
and beamed with pride. He had been right. Good christian families
like the Tate's set a good example for everyone else.

After
church the town's women swarmed around her. She held on tightly to
Nathaniel's hand and said little. Those who couldn't get close enough
to talk to her and Nathaniel talked to his brothers and their wives.
One woman, Mrs. Brown, the town's busybody marched right up to Emily
and asked her all sorts of questions. She wanted to know where she
came from and how she had gotten here and how the two had met.

Emily
answered all of her questions. Nathaniel listened to her answers.
Some were questions he hadn't been brave enough to ask himself.

“Why
didn't you marry a man in Boston?” she asked.

“I
wanted to have the right to choose my own husband.”

Nathaniel
had finally heard the reason why she was with him. He was pleased,
but he was worried that she was a runaway again. He sure did hope
that her family wouldn't show up and try to take her away from him.
Nevertheless, it was too late for that. Theirs was a true marriage.

The
family drove home after church. Emily was as quiet as usual and
Nathaniel thought about what she had said. It was starting to really
bother him. He watched her as she ate lunch. It really wasn't enough.
He would talk to her this evening when they were alone.

Edward
read from the bible and even led a discussion group. Emily was
surprised how devote the family was. Later the bible got passed
around and everyone read aloud. Katie and Bessie got help from their
husbands. They were just learning to read.

Everyone
looked unsure when it was Emily's turn. It was clear that she could
read, but would she be too shy to do it?

She
cleared her throat and read until Edward stopped her. She had a fine
reading voice, he thought. There was no reason for her not to talk.
He liked hearing her voice. It was so refined, like their mother's
had been.

Charles
and Nathaniel were thinking the same thing.

Nathaniel
still hadn't gotten around to talking with Emily about her not eating
enough. Every time they were alone he needed to make love with her.
He was trying very hard to make himself last longer so she could have
her pleasure too, but he took her too quickly every time.

She
didn't complain, but she didn't know better, he thought. He felt he
was improving. He wanted her to be happy with him.

Emily
was fitting in so well and she kept their room as neat as a pin and
his clothes were always clean and mended. She was trying very hard to
be the perfect wife for him. She deserved to have a husband that took
care of all of her needs.

He
often thought back to the time before she had come here. He had known
that he had been a bit lonely back then, but having her here was
showing him how lonely he had really been.

Nathaniel
was completely devoted to her now. His every thought had to do with
her. When he was with her he wanted to get her to smile for him. When
they were alone he wanted to make love to her.

With
each passing day he got her to say more and more.

Katie
and Bessie reported that, she was slowly starting to talk to them
too.

He
liked that she talked with him the most. In fact, he didn't notice
her shyness at all anymore, when they were alone. He felt that God
had perfectly matched them together. Only God, in his divine wisdom
could have brought her to him.

Nathaniel
thanked the Lord every night before he fell asleep and every morning
when he woke up next to her.

Katie and Bessie
had been acting strangely all morning. They were especially quiet and
they weren't worried about lunch.

Emily had a
feeling that something was wrong. Something they weren't telling her.

Had she done
something wrong? Were they mad at her?

She did as they
said all morning. She waited for them to scold her and tell her what
she had done wrong but nothing came.

They seemed
almost nervous. Maybe there were wild animals outside? Emily let her
mind wonder.

Edward came in
and nodded at the women. “Katie,” he called her to him. She went
slowly, with her head hung. They went up the stairs together.

Emily wondered
even more what was going on. If he would have wanted to make love
with her than she would have been happy, but she wasn't. A few
minutes later Emily heard him thrashing her. Emily paled and looked
at Bessie. “Why is he hurting her?”

Bessie shrugged
and continued her work.

Emily stood next
to her with her mouth wide open.

Katie screamed
out.

“Bessie, we
have to help her. He is hurting her.”

“Emily, we
can't. This is just between them. We may not disturb them. Later,
when it's my turn stay away, please. It wouldn't help me. Please
understand.” Bessie turned away from Emily and continued to work,
but Emily couldn't quite understand what she was doing. Bessie wiped
the table again and again.

Edward came down
the stairs and left. Emily found something to do, so she looked busy
too. A minute later Charles came in. He called for his wife and then
they, too, went upstairs.

Emily sat down at
the table and cried. The two of them must have broken one of the four
rules. They had even known it was coming. That was why they had been
nervous the whole day.

Emily laid her
head down on her folded arms and continued to cry into them as
Charles started in thrashing his wife too. They believed in corporal
punishment for grown women.

She heard Charles
coming, and jumped up to pretend that she was busy with something. He
left then, too. She moved to the bottom of the stairs, and debated
going up to see if she could help.

She heard the
door open and Nathaniel came in. She met his eyes. Should she tell
him what had happened?

He laid his hand
on her elbow. He could tell that she had been crying. “Come on,
Emily. Let's get this over with.”

“I beg your
pardon? No. But I didn't do anything wrong.” She backed away from
him.

“Emily, please
come here.” He had put a lot of thought into this. He had made the
decision, that it was the right thing to do. Now he just had to do
it. If he waited too long then she wouldn't take him or his rules
seriously.

She backed away
from him. “I'm sure I didn't do anything wrong. If I did then I'm
sorry. You can just tell me what it was and I'll never do it again.”
Her back hit the wall. There was nowhere to hide from him.

Nathaniel smiled
at her confused face. Her mouth was formed into a shocked O.

He closed the
distant between then and took both of her hands. He tried to pull her
with him but she stemmed her feet into the floor.