Slade's Secret Son (12 page)

“I
want to apologize for my behavior and to welcome Lisa to our family,” White Moon said as they all gathered at the dinner table a short while later.

“Ester and I understand your concern for your son. We’re just as concerned about Lisa,” Helen replied, clearly determined to let Slade’s family know that he was under as much scrutiny by her and Ester as Lisa was by them.

Not wanting the conversation to follow that path into the brier patch again, Lisa interrupted to ask Jess how Andy’s riding lessons were going.

“He’s got good balance. ’Course his legs will have to grow a bit more before he can be on his own,” Jess replied, the expression of a proud uncle on his face.

“I would think so,” Helen said sternly.

Lisa glanced toward White Moon, expecting trouble. Instead the woman frowned with parental authority at both of her sons. “I don’t want you pushing him too fast.
His feet should fit firmly in the stirrups before you allow him to even walk the pony without someone at his side.”

“Yes, ma’am,” they both answered in unison.

The servile tone of these two big men toward the much smaller woman brought a smile to Lisa’s lips and she noted that the corners of her mother’s and her aunt’s mouths curved up slightly, as well.

“I’m interested in hearing more about these women who have been trying to kill you,” Evening Flower said. “Slade has relayed only the barest of details.”

Glad to have something to talk about other than subjects that might lead to tension, Lisa launched into a recitation of their meeting with Dorothy Parkens.

“It doesn’t seem real,” she finished. “I tailed Claire Blout for two weeks. She seemed like a perfectly normal middle-aged woman. I would never have pegged her for a killer.”

White Moon’s gaze leveled on Lisa and Slade. “It would seem that it was their unhappy marriages that drove them to this extreme.”

Slade frowned at his mother. “A lot of people have unhappy marriages but they simply get divorced. These women were greedy.”

The concern on White Moon’s face increased. “Greed can be a very nasty emotion.”

The uneasy glance she cast in Lisa’s direction told Lisa she was thinking about Slade’s comfortable income. Lisa’s shoulders stiffened with indignation. Glancing toward her mother and her aunt, she realized they, too, were following White Moon’s train of thought because both were turning beet-red with anger.

Jess shook his head at his mother while Evening Flower appeared at a loss for words and Morning Hawk scowled darkly at her granddaughter.

Placing an arm around Lisa’s shoulders, Slade looked his mother in the eye. “You’re way off base if you think that Lisa would harm anyone out of greed. I trust her with my life.”

White Moon flushed with embarrassment, her expression saying that even she was shocked by what she’d just suggested. “I didn’t mean to imply she would,” she said hastily, dropping her gaze to her food.

Lisa had been willing to forgive the woman’s earlier behavior because she knew White Moon was concerned about her son, but this was an outrage. “Andy is finished and I’ve lost my appetite,” she said, rising. “If you will excuse us.”

Slade rose, too, and lifted Andy from his chair.

Taking her son by his hand, Lisa continued through the house and out the back door. Once outside, she let him pull her toward the corral where his pony was housed.

“I know that down deep my mother doesn’t really believe you would do me any harm,” Slade said, falling into step beside her.

“She went too far,” Lisa returned through clenched teeth. “Way too far. I never asked you to marry me. Tomorrow, you call your lawyer and arrange for a divorce because until I’m free of you, I’ll have to worry that every time you even stub a toe, your mother will blame me.”

“I won’t blame you,” a woman’s panicked voice sounded from behind them.

Lisa whirled around and saw White Moon hurrying toward them, a stricken look on her face. Reaching them, she faced Lisa squarely. “Of all my sons, Slade is the one I’ve worried about the most. I know I was way out of line, but ever since he told me that he intended to try
to make a go of your marriage, I’ve been deeply concerned. You have no idea how crushed he was when Claudette died. He just crumbled.” Her jaw set in a hard line. “I wanted him to find someone who would mend the wound Claudette left behind. But perhaps it can never be mended. You’ve given him a wonderful son and for that I am grateful. I just don’t want to see the two of you try to make a go of a marriage for your child’s sake that neither of you really wants and that will make you both bitter in the end.”

Claudette again
. “You’re right,” Lisa said stiffly. “An attempt would be futile and I have no desire to put myself or Slade through it.”

Slade caught her by the arm. “We can make it work.”

She jerked free. “No, we can’t.”

“Mommy?” Andy’s panicked tone reminded them he was there.

“Let’s go say good-night to your pony,” she said, turning away from Slade and his mother and continuing on toward the corral. A tear escaped and rolled down her cheek but she waited until she was a distance from them before she brushed it away.

Slade stood glowering at his mother. “You have no idea what you’ve done.”

White Moon stared at him. An expression of understanding suddenly spread over her features. “You love her. Why didn’t you tell me that?”

“I don’t love her. I like her. We’re comfortable together. I enjoy being with her.”

“You won’t let yourself love her,” White Moon corrected. As if it had all become clear to her, her gaze shifted to the woman and child by the corral. “That’s why she left, isn’t it? She loved you but knew you would
never allow yourself to love her.” Sympathy for Lisa swept through her. “Then perhaps this is for the best.”

“No, it’s not,” Slade snapped, and stalked toward the corral to join Lisa and Andy.

“I need you to leave me alone for a while,” Lisa said when he approached.

“My mother is wrong. We can make a go of our marriage,” he said curtly. “We are friends, good friends. That’s a better start than a lot of marriages have.”

“So we’ll end ours better than most, as well. I’ll settle for a friendly divorce.”

Slade heard the hint of pain in her voice. It was the same hint he’d heard on their last date when she’d said goodbye. Maybe his mother was right. “I’ll do whatever will make you happy.”

She tightened her chin to keep it from trembling. “Then go contact your lawyer and get the papers drawn up.”

Responding to the dismissal in her voice, Slade headed back to the house.

Andy tugged at Lisa’s hand. “Mommy?” he asked with concern.

“Mommy’s fine,” she assured him, squatting down and giving him a hug.

“It’s getting chilly out here.” Helen’s voice sounded from behind them and Lisa turned to see her mother and her aunt coming her way, her mother carrying a jacket for Andy and one for her.

“What happened?” Ester asked bluntly when they reached her.

“Just a little more clearing of the air,” Lisa replied, accepting her jacket while her mother took Andy and began putting his jacket on him.

“White Moon came in all contrite and told us she realized
she’d been wrong to ever doubt you. Then Slade came stalking in and didn’t say a word to anyone. He just went into the study and slammed the door closed.”

“He’s contacting his lawyer to have our divorce papers drawn up,” Lisa said stiffly.

“So that’s why White Moon was so nice,” Ester muttered. “She managed to break up your marriage.” She glanced at her watch. “In less than six hours.”

“She didn’t break it up. She merely caused me to face the truth. And,” she added, determined to do her part to keep peace between the families, “as I recall, neither of you were happy about my marrying Slade. The both of you knew it was only because of Andy and it wasn’t going to last.”

“True.” Helen shivered and frowned over her shoulder at the ranch house. “I’ll be glad to get back home.”

Lisa, too, was looking at the ranch house and dreading entering it again. “Would you two take Andy inside and put him to bed?” she requested. “I’d like some time alone.”

“Of course.” Helen took Andy by the hand and, fastening her free hand around Ester’s arm, pulled her along, as well.

Alone, Lisa rested her arms on the wooden railing of the corral and let the tears trickle down her cheeks. The feel of a hand coming to rest on her arm caused her to jump. Jerking her gaze around to see who had intruded on her privacy, she discovered it was Morning Hawk.

“This divorce is wrong. Your tears are proof of it.” The elderly woman spoke with the authority of a sage.

Lisa brushed at her cheeks, furious that she’d let anyone see her cry. “No, it isn’t. In the end, it will keep a great many more of my tears from spilling.”

“You cannot cut Slade out of your life with a piece of paper. He won’t allow that. Andy is his son.”

“I don’t plan to cut him out.”

“He will be a good and loyal husband to you. That is more than many women who marry for love end up with.”

“I can’t stay married to him.”

Morning Hawk regarded her sternly. “Slade is a good man. You would be a fool to discard him.”

“Discard? You make it sound like I have a choice. I don’t.” The tears again welled in Lisa’s eyes. “If I stay married to him, I will always hope that one day he will open his heart to me. And he won’t. I’ll grow old and frustrated and, perhaps, even bitter. That won’t be good for either of us.”

“You could be wrong. Given time, he may open his heart to you.”

The tears began to spill again. “You have no idea how much I’d like to believe that, but I learned the hard way that it’s not going to happen. When we began our affair, I had hopes that he would learn to love me. He didn’t. When I left, he watched me walk away, then went on with his life without any further thought of me. I don’t blame him. He told me from the start that he never intended to fall in love again. But it still hurt. I’m not setting myself up for that kind of pain again.”

Morning Hawk looked over her shoulder toward the house. “He can be stubborn. It’s a strong trait in Logan men.” Breathing a resigned sigh, she turned back to Lisa. “But whatever happens between you and Slade, you must always remember that you are family now.”

“My son is family,” Lisa corrected, certain she would never be anyone other than the woman who gave birth to Slade’s child.

Morning Hawk took her hand. “You are family.” She gave the hand a squeeze then released it. “And now I will leave you to your solitude.”

“Thank you.” Watching the elderly Apache make her way back to the house, Lisa doubted the rest of the family felt the same as Morning Hawk. “This is the only solution,” she murmured under her breath.

Returning to the house, Lisa hoped to make it to her son’s room to see that he was tucked in and then retreat to her room without encountering anyone. But, entering the kitchen, she found her mother, her aunt, Slade’s mother and grandmother all sitting around the table. From the united expressions on their faces, it was clear they had come to a truce.

White Moon rose and came toward her. “I am truly sorry this marriage between you and my son is not going to work out.”

Lisa noted that the sincerity on her face was genuine.

“Slade is a fool for letting my niece go,” Ester mumbled.

Helen nudged her hard. “If it’s not meant to be, then it’s not meant to be.”

Although Lisa had told her mother many times that Slade had not seduced her…that she had been the one to pursue the affair, Lisa had suspected that her mother harbored some animosity toward him. The edge of anger she heard in her mother’s voice told her she was right. Clearly, as far as Helen was concerned, Lisa was doing the right thing. “I’m going to check on Andy and then go to bed,” she said, continuing through the room.

Entering Andy’s room, she stood watching him sleep. “I knew your father was trouble from the start,” she murmured under her breath. “But I will never regret having
you.” She placed a light kiss on his cheek, then went to the room she and Slade had been given.

The sight of his suitcase caused her to freeze. From deep within an intense anger, an anger she had been suppressing all these years, began to build. Picking up the suitcase, she left the room and went in search of Slade. She found him in the study, standing staring out the window. Entering, she set his suitcase down with a thud. “You can find someplace else to bunk,” she snapped.

Slade turned to face her. His expression shuttered, he nodded his acceptance of her decision.

Lisa started to leave, but the rage she was feeling was too strong. Kicking the door closed with the heel of her shoe, she turned back. “I know I’m not perfect, but I would have made you a terrific wife,” she stormed. Bravado and pride forced her to add, “Someday, when you’re old and alone, you’re going to regret casting me aside in favor of a ghost.”

“It’s not that simple.”

“I know. I know.” She meant to say nothing more, but her anger was still too strong to control. “You don’t want to go through the pain of losing a woman you love again. Well, life is full of ups and downs and that’s just one of them.”

“It isn’t just fear.” The agony he kept hidden inside etched itself into his features. “I owe Claudette my unwavering allegiance.”

Stunned by the anguish she saw on his face, Lisa stared at him in confusion. “You
owe
her?”

“She would be alive today, if it wasn’t for me.” This confession tore from him, exposing the guilt that had been haunting him all these years.

Her rage was now completely gone. This was a Slade she’d never seen. Sympathy for him swept through her.
“You weren’t responsible. She was hit by a drunk driver.”

“We’d had a quarrel. I’d been working on a case and she was feeling neglected. She thought I wasn’t as attracted to her because she was pregnant. I tried to tell her that I thought she was beautiful, but she was too emotional to listen. She slammed out of the house saying she was going for a drive to cool off. I figured I’d take her someplace special for dinner the next night. I’d made the arrangements and was waiting for her to come home when the call came.” He inhaled a terse breath. “I should never have let her get behind the wheel.”