Silver Kiss (3 page)

I was surprised to feel tears stinging my
eyes as the Pack sang together, the haunting cries echoing through
the forest as if they’d sing down the moon herself. My wolf was
bursting to be free now, no longer scared but frantic with joy. She
was home. She’d missed her Pack. I hadn’t realized it before—I’d
been content with Shannon and my freedom. When I left home I’d been
a disappointment to my parents and an anomaly to the Pack as a
whole. I wasn’t sure I’d ever stop feeling like that, but the music
of the Pack went some way towards assuring me.

Eddie bent to dip his fingers in the rapidly
cooling lamb’s blood and drew a sticky design on my forehead. I
glanced at the crowd and saw my parents beaming with joy. Mum waved
at me and I wriggled my fingers at her in return, not sure if
protocol allowed a real wave back.

Eddie grasped my hand and pressed the blade
to my palm. I shivered, anticipating the pain. I remembered it
hurting the first time round. Not as the actual cut was made, but
afterwards, it had stung like hell.

“
Relax,” he whispered. “It
hurts more if you tense up.”

I forced myself to loosen my muscles as he
made the cut. Blood welled immediately, followed by a flash of
pain. I sucked in a deep breath as Eddie raised my hand and the
blood dripped slowly to the ground. He recited the words again,
like they were a magic spell, transforming me from a lone wolf to a
Pack member.

“
Welcome back, Ayla,” Eddie
said as he stepped away from me. “You’re one of us again now,
kid.”

One of
us
. I couldn’t help but grimace a little at
that, but before I could react, Vince shot from the crowd to crash
into me, knocking me to the ground with an excited yap. I landed
hard, two hundred pounds of wolf on top of me, and the air whooshed
from my lungs. I gasped as Vince washed my face and snuffled into
my hair, trying to draw some oxygen back in. I wrapped my arms
around him and managed to flip us over, pinning him.

My wolf wouldn’t be denied anymore. She
wanted to run, wanted to hunt, wanted to play. I kicked off my
shoes and let the change that had been itching at me all night take
me over. A molten wash of pleasure-pain consumed me for a brief
instant as my body reshaped itself. The song of the Pack resonated
through me as I changed; taking on new meaning as my wolf half took
over.

I stood, flicking my ears
and shaking my tail as the world took on new depth and aromas to my
lupine senses. Vince, next to me, whined and nibbled at my ruff,
inviting me to play. Before I could turn and swat at him, another
wolf rammed into me, knocking me to the earth and running her great
tongue over my face.
Mum
. I rolled onto my back, exposing
my vulnerable belly to her, a sign of trust as much as
submission.

She crouched, forelegs splayed, plumed tail
waving madly. I hadn’t played with Mum like this since I was tiny.
I leapt back to my feet and ran round her, barking and feinting at
her. She bared her teeth and snapped at me as I danced past, making
no real effort to catch me.

Vince pounced at me again, grabbing my ruff
and growling at me. I flipped round, twisting myself free, and
batted at him. Briefly forgetting Mum, we tumbled head over tail
together, sheer exhilaration speeding through me. The sounds of the
forest beckoned me away from the circle and the bonfire. Vince
clearly wanted to race off too. But I hesitated, turning back to
look at my Pack through wolf eyes for the first time in eight
years.

The older wolves lounged around, loftily
ignoring our antics. Teenagers, still human shaped, were sneaking
away from the circle now that the ceremony was over. My dad was
leaning against a tree, talking with a wolf I didn’t know. Joel was
popping open a can of beer and chatting to Glory, who was slipping
out of her shoes. And as much as my wolfish heart swelled at the
sight of them all, my family, my Pack, accepting me home again, my
human heart sank at the thought of Shannon back home. Alone.

Vince nipped my tail and I spun on him with
a mock-snarl. While we darted and danced together, Glory and Joel
shifted. Joel barked at us as they ran past into the forest and
Vince quickly took off after them. While I paused, Mum nudged me
forward with a whine. The message was clear—I’d done the formal
stuff. Now I could go.

I raced off after Vince.

It was a cold night and game was scarce. The cubs had already
flushed out most of the rabbits and deer that were about, so the
hunting was soon over for the four of us. There was no fun to be
had in chasing rats and voles. After about an hour of racing around
the forest, we shifted back and collapsed under the bare branches
of a dying beech tree. I could hear the sounds of Lupercali in full
swing—howls and laughs, barks and shouts. The smell of the barbeque
overpowered the smell of game, which was muted by the ice
anyway.

Werewolves’ blood runs a bit hotter than
humans, so the chill that kept them inside on nights like this
didn’t bother us as much. It would be a while before we really felt
it, as warm as we were from exercise and the shift. We curled up
together, skin to skin, and watched the moon and stars overhead. I
felt happy and sated, almost like I’d been drinking. Vince wrapped
one arm around me and one around Joel, pulling us in together.
Glory—stripped of her wig and glittering shoes by the shift and now
Glenn; slender and boyish and smeared with ruined makeup—lay next
to Joel.

“
I told you there was
nothing to worry about,” Vince said, nuzzling my hair.

“
I was mostly worried about
falling off my shoes.” I curled my bare toes into the dirt. Now it
was over, I wasn’t really sure why I’d been so worked up. Yeah, I’d
hated everyone staring at me, but I hadn’t tripped over or thrown
up, I hadn’t embarrassed myself or my parents and I was happy.
Happy to be home, something I never thought I’d say, when for so
long
home
had been
synonymous with
miserable
and
misunderstood
.

Voices drifted through the night towards us,
accompanied by the burned paper smell of cigarettes. There was an
odd tang mixed with the tobacco, something I didn’t recognize, but
my wolf found intriguing. I narrowed my eyes, picking out the
approaching teenagers. Thin tendrils of grey-blue smoke curled into
the air over their heads and the cherries of their roll-ups glowed
in the shadows.

“
Hey, check it out,” one of
the boys called when they spied us. “It’s the queer wolves!”
Giggles broke out amongst the girls in the group.

I sighed and Joel rolled his eyes. “Very
clever,” he said. “You kids must have been waiting all night to get
that gem out.”

One of them broke free of the group to join
us under the tree, a grin on his cherubic face as he blew smoke
towards us. “Just messing around,” he said and nodded to Vince.
“Alright, Vince?”

“
Hi, Oscar.” Vince stood
and pulled me up with him. “Ayla, this is Oscar. He’s a waiter at
the Fox. He thinks he’s hilarious but he’s actually just annoying.”
He reached out and ruffled Oscar’s blond curls. “I want to fire him
but he’s the boss’ kid. Nepotism at work.”

“
Hi Oscar,” I said,
inhaling deeply to try and identify the weird smell coming off his
roll-up. It was sort of earthy, but with a metallic
aftertaste.
Unpleasant
. “What are you smoking?”

Oscar offered me the cigarette. “Silver
Kiss. Want to try?”

“
What’s in it?” I
asked.

He winked at me. “Little of this, little of
that.”

I hadn’t ever smoked, so Oscar’s mystery
roll-up didn’t really entice me. Vince shook his head and Joel
turned his nose up, but Glenn accepted. He took a deep drag, then
coughed violently and hurriedly passed the cigarette back to Oscar.
“Vile habit,” he muttered, wiping his mouth.

Oscar took another drag and fixed me with a
slightly glazed stare. “You’re Adam’s cousin, right? You killed
that copper.”

“
I didn’t kill anyone,” I
corrected, that tight knot pulling at my stomach again. “But yeah,
I am Adam’s cousin. Did you know him?”

“
Yeah, a bit.” Oscar sat
down, gesturing for us to do the same. A couple of his friends
drifted over to join him, all smoking the same metallic-scented
roll-ups. I wondered briefly if it was illegal, then dropped the
thought. I wasn’t a copper yet.

“
I knew him,” a blonde girl
chipped in, settling down next to Oscar and resting her head on his
shoulder. “Is it true it was an Alpha Humans attack?”

I shrugged, wanting to pull into myself and
hide from them. Adam’s death was still officially an open case as
far as I knew. There was no proof that Alpha Humans were behind it
and the involvement of two crooked cops in the aftermath had
complicated things further. Anyway, it wasn’t my place to talk
about it. I hadn’t really known Adam—he’d been a child when I left
home—and I didn’t think his parents would want me gossiping about
his brutal murder with stoned teenagers.

Vince sensed my discomfort and shooed the
kids away. “Come on, it’s Lupercali,” he said. “Haven’t you lot got
better things to do than hang around here?”

They conceded that they did and disappeared
into the night, whooping and shrieking at each other. I stretched
and tilted my head back to the moon. Moths fluttered around me,
wings glancing across my bare skin, and I shivered, suddenly
longing for wolf shape again. The aroma of charred meat wafted back
to us from the barbeque and my stomach growled. I glanced at the
others. “Race you back?”

Seconds later, we were sprinting through the
forest again, singing as we ran.

The night was fading fast by the time Lupercali drew to a close.
People had been drifting away slowly as the night waned, replete
with alcohol and food. My little group had lingered late—or early,
maybe. My parents had found us once we got back to the clearing and
we’d lazed around with them eating charred hot dogs and discussing
mine and Shannon’s plans for the future.

It was nice.
Really
. But God, I was
glad when Mum finally stood, stretched her arms and announced she
was heading home. I scrambled to my feet to hug her and Dad,
promised to call them soon, and followed Vince and Joel back the
car.

The slinky red dress I’d started the night
in was in tatters, barely covering me, and the seatbelt cut into my
shoulders and stomach, leaving me wriggling around to get
comfortable. Joel grinned at me in the rearview mirror as I
struggled.

“
So that’s it. You’re
officially home again.”

“
I’ve been home for three
months,” I pointed out. “I’m officially Pack again.”

“
It’s the same thing,” he
said. “Now all you need is a decent house.”

I bit back my retort, too tired and content
to be bothered. My crappy little house might not match up to Joel’s
high standards, but that was his problem, not mine. I pictured
Shannon curled up in bed, blonde hair fanned out across the pillows
and a tingle of pleasure weaved through me.

She wasn’t in bed when I crept into the
house at five am though. She was sitting at the kitchen table,
cradling a steaming mug of tea in one hand and finger-combing her
tangled hair with the other.

“
Hey.” I slid into the seat
next to her. “Hope you haven’t been waiting up for me.”

She smiled wearily and looked me over. “Good
night, by the looks of it?”

I had dead leaves stuck to my feet and my
hair was disheveled and rimed with frost. The odor of barbeque and
cigarette smoke clung to me. My sliced palm stung but the shallow
wound was already healing. “Better than I expected,” I admitted. I
prodded her with my toes, brushing the soft flannel of her pajamas.
“So, why are you up so early?”

“
Oh, I couldn’t sleep. I
thought I might as well get up and do something productive as lay
in bed staring at the ceiling.” She tapped the papers in front of
her. “I’m just looking at the notes for this meeting
again.”

“
Is there a problem?” I
craned my neck to get a look at the notes. “Missing
person?”

“
Yeah, not my usual field.
I’ll probably end up referring her somewhere else.” She yawned.
“But it’s a start.”

“
Something to tide you over
until you get back into the thrilling world of tax evasion and
unpaid parking tickets?” I couldn’t quite keep the sarcasm from my
voice. I’d helped Shannon out on a few of her cases and had quickly
decided her job wasn’t for me; too much sitting around.

She shuffled her papers together and leaned
over to kiss my nose. “When you’re handing out those parking
tickets and filing witness reports on those tax evaders, don’t come
crying to me.” She stood. “I’m going for a shower. I can’t think
straight with you sat there half-naked. Put some clothes on, will
you? For my sake.”

***

While waiting to hear from the police, I was working at a tattoo
parlor to pay my share of the bills. I’d done the same job before
and liked the environment. Inked was a new shop, relaxed and
bright, pumping indie rock through the speakers. Photos of finished
tattoos lined the walls: everything from complex, swirling tribal
designs to tacky, leering cartoon devils. Soft sofas sat by the
window, facing a display case of lip rings and navel bars. Tattoo
and music magazines were scattered on the glass and metal table by
the sofas, inspiring customers to plump for bolder, crazier
designs.