Silent Truths (28 page)

Feeling a new onslaught of panic starting to rise, she abruptly got up from the chaise, picked up her keys and went to let herself back into the apartment. She couldn’t remain alone with her thoughts any longer – they were driving her crazy. She needed some kind of distraction, something to remove her from the misery that was making it so hard to stay calm. After checking her parents weren’t around she picked up the phone.

‘Oh, I’m sorry, Ava,’ Caroline said, ‘Robin’s out at a meeting. But I know he wants to talk to you. We’ve had some pretty exciting news.’

Beth’s heart gave a beat of pleasure. This was just what she needed, to hear someone call her Ava, and have them tell her that one part of her life at least was good and free of the pain. ‘I suppose
you’re going to keep me on tenterhooks,’ she teased lightly.

‘I’m sorry, but I know Robin wants to tell you himself.’

‘Of course. When will he be back?’

‘Not until the end of the day, but I’m sure he’ll call before he goes home. Probably seven or eight your time.’

‘I’ll be here all evening,’ Ava told her.

After ringing off she went to look in the mirror. Her tan was very deep now, and her glossy, dark chestnut hair had grown a lot these last few weeks. It didn’t look too bad, actually, though now she came to think about it … She tilted her head to one side. No, something about it wasn’t right. For some reason, it didn’t quite suit her. Maybe she should go and get it cut. Or maybe … Yes! Of course. Why hadn’t she realized it before? A woman like Ava would never have brown hair. She’d be seriously held back by such an incorrect feature, which had to be why she was having such trouble staying on top of Beth.

Returning to the phone, she pressed the button for the clubhouse, got put through to the hair salon, and two hours later she re-emerged into the sunlight with an exquisitely stylish blonde crop that framed her face in a way that made her features both sultry and elfin. Hearing someone whistle she smiled, then laughed, and was suddenly warmed by a feeling of more confidence and sexual power than she’d ever had in her life.

‘My God, what have you done?’ her mother cried, when she walked in, the horror appearing quite genuine.

‘Isn’t it fabulous?’ Ava purred, pouting from side to side in the mirror.

Her father was watching from his balcony chair, though staying well out of it.

Joyce’s face was twisted in rancour. ‘Well, at least no one’ll recognize you now,’ she said acidly.

Beth’s teeth were clenched; Ava’s smile was dazzling. ‘Time to go shopping,’ she declared. ‘Can I take the convertible?’

‘As long as you bring it back in one piece. And while you’re out, get yourself some decent clothes.’

‘What’s the matter with this?’ Ava challenged, blousing out the copious folds of her white cotton dress that had a perfectly modest top with shoestring straps.

Joyce merely grunted and turned away, so Ava swept up the keys and went off to find the car.

The local town wasn’t far, though most shops were still closed for the afternoon siesta. It didn’t matter. She was content to stroll around the nearly deserted streets, catching wonderful glimpses of her glamorous new self in darkened windows, and stopping at a stall for ice cream. The vendor didn’t speak English, but the look in his eyes easily conveyed the meaning of his words. Ava laughed in a girlish, flirtatious fashion, then, tossing her head like a diva, she walked off licking her ice cream, knowing he was watching her sensuously swaying hips.

Turning into a narrow, palm-lined street, she continued watching her reflection, falling more and more in love with her gorgeous new look. It was making her feel so alive and reckless, so gloriously detached from her mother’s daughter, that she
could almost be a brand-new person. How wonderful that would be to break away from the past completely, let all her problems and fears fade like bad dreams, and step into a whole other existence. Not one that was just temporary, the way Ava was now, but one that could take over entirely, transporting her to whole new experiences she’d never had before, places she’d never been and where no one at all knew her. There’d be no one to hurt her then, no one to tell her she looked like a tart, or that she should get a divorce. With Ava’s glamour and self-confidence she could start a whole new life so full of fun and laughter that everyone, just everyone, would adore her.

Smiling at the fantasy she idled a while at the window of a perfumery before moving lazily on. There was no one else around, except the man strolling along behind her, and though there didn’t appear anything particularly menacing about him, she decided that since this was a bit of a backwater she should maybe return to the main street. However, short of doubling back, she had no other way to go, for she hadn’t any idea which of the narrow lanes she was passing might take her in the right direction. Then she spotted a shop that was open, just up ahead, all its wares displayed outside, from snorkels and flippers, to buckets and spades, to T-shirts and shorts.

Pausing to browse, she waited to see what the man following her would do. From the few glimpses she’d caught of him, she didn’t think he was Spanish, but it was hard to tell in a distorted shop-window reflection. He was very close to her now, still ambling along, hands in his pockets, eyes
mainly on the sky above as he whistled tunefully to himself. In fact he didn’t even look at her as he passed, just continued on down the street, as though he were the only human being in the world.

She was about to turn back the way she’d come when the shop’s owner appeared, and beckoned her inside.

‘I have very beautiful dresses for the lady,’ he told her. ‘Very beautiful for the night and for the day. Come. You see.’

Well, that was what she was here for, to do some shopping, and though this didn’t look at all like Ava’s kind of shop, with nothing else open why not give it a try?

To her amazement, when she stepped inside she found she was in another world altogether. There was no touristy bric-a-brac in here, in fact there was hardly any clutter at all, with the exception of a couple of overstuffed dress racks and a small mountain of boxes. The rest of the carefully spot-lit interior was given over to an impressive display of women’s clothing by many designers she’d heard of and some she hadn’t. There was some expensive-looking beachwear too, and even a selection of designer shoes.

The owner was beaming with pride. ‘Everyone have surprise when they come in for first time,’ he told her. ‘But my special customers, they know about me. They come always to Antonio. I have the best dresses. Please, you look.’

Happy to, Ava turned to a row of exotic-looking sarongs that had already caught her eye. Taking one from the hanger, she wrapped it around her waist and turned to the mirror. Immediately her
heart lifted at the blonde vision she now was, with her perfect golden tan and simple white dress.

‘Please, you try anything,’ Antonio insisted. ‘You have very lovely shape. All dresses look good on you.’

Absorbing the compliment, Ava cast him a look from the corner of her eye, then carried on browsing. He was tall for a Spaniard, she was thinking, with a pretty good body of his own. His shirt was open almost to the waist, and his trousers were the customary hip-huggers the Latins often went in for. She guessed he was around the same age as her, though maybe a little older. It could be fun trying on clothes and having him admire her.

The first two dresses she slipped into were from the Armani day collection. Though elegant, they didn’t set either her or Antonio on fire, so he began bringing in a slightly more colourful selection with more daring cuts and unusual styles. It was exciting her to leave the curtain partially open while she changed, so he could see her in her strapless bra and panties. The bra was only because the white dress was semi-transparent; she was hardly well-endowed enough to make one necessary otherwise. Then Antonio brought her a stunning gold evening gown that was cut very low in front and had no back at all.

‘This is for you,’ he declared with certainty. ‘In this, you are the most beautiful woman in all of Spain.’

Laughing softly, she hung up the dress, feeling tiny frissons of excitement eddying through her as she failed to close the curtain fully. Her heart was hammering as she let the burnt-orange dress she
was wearing fall to the floor then unhooked her bra. She had no idea if he was watching, but it was enough to know he might be. She looked at her dark nipples in the mirror, standing out large and proud. Then reaching for the dress, she slipped it from the hanger, undid the zip at the waist and stepped into it.

The shimmering gold top was a halter, and was cut lower in the front than anything she’d ever worn in her life. It was almost to her navel, and the view of her totally naked back with her new blonde hair curling in wisps around her neck was utterly exquisite.

‘Ah,
Mamá mía
,’ Antonio murmured, clapping his hands together as she came out of the changing room. ‘Is very beautiful, no? Is dress made for you. We just need maybe to move the buttons here …’ Turning her round to face a mirror, he pulled the halter top a little tighter. ‘See. Is perfect now,’ he said. And holding it in place with one hand, he swept the other down the front V of the dress, almost touching her, but not quite. ‘Like this,’ he said, letting the halter go slack, ‘is too big. Like this,’ he tightened it again, ‘is perfect. And the length is good too. She stop at the knee, and we see the wrapover show us the legs. You like?’

Ava was entranced. She looked and felt like a goddess.

‘We have shoes,’ he told her, taking off to get them. ‘You want try the shoes?’

They were gold mules with four-inch heels and two sparkly bands across the front. Slipping her feet into them she walked up and down the shop, admiring herself in the mirror and becoming more
and more turned on by the daring that was electrifying her mind. ‘I’ll take the dress and shoes,’ she said. ‘And maybe a bikini.’

‘Oh
sí
,’ he agreed. ‘We have fantastic bikinis. I show you.’

As he went to sort out the best, she returned to the changing room and removed the dress. She was slipping it back on the hanger when he opened the curtain and put two bikinis on one of the hooks. ‘You try,’ he said, not looking at her breasts, but surely noticing them.

Allowing the curtain to remain as open as he left it, she slipped her panties down over her long brown legs, then stood straight to take one of the bikinis from its hanger. It was lime green with turquoise polka dots, no straps and a thong back. After she’d put it on, she stepped out into the shop to look in the mirror. Antonio was right behind her.

‘I don’t think so,’ she said, hands on hips as she shifted her weight on to one leg. Had he seen her naked? She hoped so, but just in case she wanted to be naked again.

‘You try the other,’ he suggested.

Leaving the curtain open again, she removed the bikini entirely, then reached for the other. Never in all her life had she been this brazen, nor would she be now, without Ava in control, and even Ava didn’t know how far she might go, particularly with the door to outside still open. Anyone could come in at any moment, and the risk was so erotic it was almost making her faint.

Making a circle with his finger and thumb as she stepped out in the black bikini, Antonio said, ‘Perfect.’

She turned to the mirror. The throbbing between her legs was intense; her nipples were like rock. ‘I agree,’ she said, her voice faltering slightly.

‘Yes. I think you must take this one,’ he told her, coming to stand very close behind her.

Her heart was beating wildly. She was certain she could feel his breath on her shoulder. She wondered what she’d do if he touched her. Did she want him to? She wasn’t sure. She slid her hands over her hips, keeping her eyes away from his. It was as though they’d both become frozen in the moment, uncertain where to go from here. Then, hearing a noise, they both turned and looked at the door. It was the idly strolling man who’d passed her earlier, returned to browse through the tat outside. She half suspected that he’d been there for a while, had possibly even seen her naked too. Did she mind about that? She didn’t think so, but she wanted to get dressed now, this had gone far enough.

Later, as she recalled the episode, and explored its wonderfully erotic potential, she realized that what was exciting her the most was the way Ava had managed, for those few precious minutes, to transport her out of Beth’s misery into a whole other consciousness. If she could do it once, she could do it again, maybe for longer, with more courage and daring. It was what she wanted – to become so far removed from who Beth really was that eventually she could forget she even existed.

Her lips curved in a smile. She looked different, and even now, all these hours later, she still felt different, but she had to confess that the prospect of getting to know all sides of Ava’s nature in order to
become her completely was filling her with fear as much as excitement.

This was the third time in her career that Laurie had visited someone inside Wandsworth Prison, so the unwelcome interest, plus the crude gestures and comments were expected, though still offensive. However, she maintained a pleasant expression as she worked her way through the closely packed lines of tables towards Colin Ashby, whom she’d spotted in a far corner at the back of the room. Because it was so hot out she was wearing thin, yellow cotton trousers and a white T-shirt with an embroidered waistcoat buttoned over the top of it, for the last thing she wanted, especially in a place like this, was for the ampleness of her breasts to be noticed. Nevertheless, her ash-blonde hair, clear creamy skin and deep blue eyes made her look as fresh as a spring flower that had somehow wafted into a drab and dingy backyard.

As she neared him Ashby glanced at her, but didn’t even seem to register her as he looked on past. She saw that his eyes were bloodshot and exhausted; he was badly shaven and his pallor was a ghostly grey. Though she hadn’t imagined he’d create the picture of health, she was still shaken, for it seemed that his legendary easy-going charm and confidence had already been beaten into submission.