Silent Night: Vampire Holiday Romance (The Night Songs Collection Book 4) (28 page)

“I didn’t want them,” he said through clenched teeth. “I wanted you.”

“You have me.” I tried kissing him, but he didn’t want to let me in. “You can’t say you’ve never thought about this.”

“I have.” He still hadn’t warmed up. “But it was always something that happened in the future. Not yet. You have so much life to live. I can’t take that away from you.”

“I can live it with you,” My voice softened. “It should be pretty obvious to you by now that nothing in my life is guaranteed. Landmines go off around me on a daily basis. You snooze, you lose.”

He laughed. Thank God. “What if you regret this? We can’t fix it.”

“I won’t.” I could barely breathe. “I promise you.”

Aidan swallowed hard. “I would have to drink a lot of your blood. It’s risky, Kyndra. And then you drink mine. It’s not an easy transition. It hurts like hell, and there’s no guarantee that you’re going to wake up the same person you are now. It’s not like snapping your fingers, or taking a pill.”

“So it might not work?”

“No.” Aidan’s eyes were so dark. “It’s a messy, archaic practice. I learned the hard way it’s not something to play with.”

My hands were still intertwined with his, between my legs, since I straddled his lap. “Anything worth having isn’t easy.” I bit my lip. “If that’s what I have to risk to have you forever, I think it’s worth it.”

He put his hands around my waist, so I stood up. He walked away from me.

“Aidan, please.” I followed after him.

When he turned around, his eyes were red and his mouth was open, fully exposing fangs. My breath caught in my throat. He didn’t look human, and I tried my damnedest not to let it scare me.

“This is what you want.” His voice rumbled.

I nodded. Words would betray me.

“You want to hide in the shadows? Be shunned by society? To have to live a lie?”

“I don’t think it’s any worse than living on the streets.” I tried to keep my voice from shaking. “Or having to rely on a junkie to survive.”

Aidan looked normal again. I let out a breath that I hoped he didn’t notice. “I love you, Kyndra. Not only for what you were to me at one time. For the woman you are now and the woman that you’re going to be. I can’t take that away from you.”

“I love you, too.” My heart swelled with his words. “The only way you’d be taking anything away from me is to not let me be with you.”

“This isn’t an easy way out.”

“I know that.” My head was pounding. My body was still so worn out from everything that happened, and going back to work in less than a day was staring me in the face. I knew I couldn’t do it. “I’m going to bed.”

I didn’t bother putting my pajamas on, I stripped down and slid between the blankets, relishing the soft feel against my skin. I needed all the comfort I get. I wished there was an off switch for my brain. I hadn’t expected Aidan to follow me to bed, he still had hours of consciousness left. I thought he’d want to take advantage of that drama free time without Kyndra to try to get his life back to normal.

But no, he wanted me. I opened my arms, welcoming him. He took my mouth greedily, sucking my tongue, scraping his teeth against my already sore lips. I moaned, the pain a welcome distraction. I pushed my hips against his, grinding in rhythm with him.

“This is what you want?” His words came between gasps.

“I don’t know how else to tell you.” I didn’t want him to know how frustrated he was making me. All he had to do to make me believe in him was kill me. Why did he keep hesitating? “I want to be with you forever.”

He pushed my legs apart, I cried out when he plunged inside me. This wasn’t making love, this was straight up fucking. Wild, primal, bodies clashing and reacting. I moaned every time he slammed against me, wrapping my legs around him so he couldn’t stop.

A bright, electric pain seared my neck, and my life flowed into Aidan, fueling his passion, sending me to drift away on a magic carpet. He pulled my head off the pillow, his hips resting as he concentrated on taking my blood. I opened my eyes. Reality was mottled, and stars burst in my vision. My heart beat slowed in time with each sip.

I tried to say so many things. I had the urge to tell Aidan everything about me, that happened to me as a little girl, all those stupid little details that didn’t matter, but added up to make me Kyndra. I had so much to ask him about his life, my life. I wanted to pray. But I wasn’t strong enough to make the words.

He let go of my neck, running his fingers lightly over the wound. I felt so cold, so weak. Air tasted heavy, I didn’t want to breathe.

“Open your mouth, my love.” Aidan’s finger pushed my bottom lip down gently, and his blood, my blood, dripped in. I coughed as it hit the back of my throat, not strong enough to swallow. Aidan said something, but I didn’t understand the words. He tipped my head up so the blood could slide down.

My belly warmed like someone turned on an oven. My lips moved against his skin, taking my blood back from his body. The warmth spread from my belly to my arms and legs, fingers and toes. Light radiated through me.

Memere was there, with us, I saw her again. I was embarrassed she was seeing me like this, in bed with a man, drinking his blood. I could swear she nodded, and then turned to walk away from us. I reached out, wanting to call her back. I didn’t want her to leave me again.

I guess she thought I was in good hands.

The light I felt turned to fire. I screamed, and Aidan took his arm away, holding on to me tightly. I fought him, I wanted more blood, but he was so much stronger than me and I was still so weak, I gave up. There would be time for that later. Forever.

My world faded to black. I’d never felt as loved as I did at that moment. I knew when I woke up, I’d have Aidan forever.

That night, I brought my beloved home.

I hope you enjoyed Kyndra and Aidan’s story in
Silent Night
. The Night Songs Collection will continue, but I’m also beginning a new series. There might not be any vampires, but I promise there will be plenty of musicians. Please turn the page to meet Daisy and Cam and to read the first chapter of
Secondhand Heart
.

Lending is enabled on this book. There’s no better compliment than sharing this book with a friend. I appreciate every review.

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One

Bree was my best friend, but she couldn’t keep a secret for shit. That’s how I knew that my sister Evelyn’s surprise plans for my twenty-first birthday couldn’t have been that exciting. Bree hadn’t slipped at all. And she loved gossip. Any time I had news I didn’t want to share with the world, I simply didn’t tell her.

“What did you do last night?” Ev laughed at me when I rolled down the stairs at the crack of noon. Her skin was glowing, probably from sunrise yoga or something. I still had sleep crumbs in my eyes. “Did you have a date?”

“Shh.” Perfect example. I let Bree sign me up for an online dating site a few weeks ago, and of course, she told Ev. I got way more hits than I expected, and certainly more than I wanted. Turns out older dudes are really into chubby chicks. Some of them I talked to, because I didn’t want to look like an asshole, but I always blew them off before we could actually go out. “I didn’t go anywhere. I watched baseball with Dad and drank a six pack of blueberry beer.”

I didn’t have to tell her that I spent the night missing Jordan, my husband. She knew. He’d been killed in the line of duty a year ago in Afghanistan. That roadside bomb took everything from me. His dog tags clanked against the counter as I made my coffee. I never took them off.

“Oooh. Bunker Hill?” Ev asked and I nodded. “I love that stuff. But it’s got a higher alcohol content than the swill Dad likes to drink, so it will kick your ass if you’re not careful. No wonder you look like hell. I figured you’d be out partying it up.”

“Thanks a lot.” I ran my finger under my eyes, not remembering if I washed off my makeup last night. I’m sure I’d cried it all off, anyway. I needed grease to kill this hangover. I pulled out the frying pan and cracked some eggs.

“We have a birthday cake shake, Daisy,” My mom almost sang, as she danced around me making my eggs and toast. Now that Mom worked for Lifedrinks, a weight loss shake that among other things, promised world peace, she judged everything I put in my mouth. “All you need is skim milk, chocolate pudding mix—“

I couldn’t take this shit before my coffee. “Why would I want that when I can have real birthday cake for my birthday?” Wait a minute. “In what universe is pudding better for you than eggs?”

I didn’t have to turn away from the frying pan to know that my mother was sputtering. Ev giggled. I’d asked her something that wasn’t covered in the sales brochure. “It’s about feeling satisfied. And in control.”

“Ma, stop it. It’s Daisy’s birthday weekend.” Ev shook her head. Mom’s sales pitches had been making us bristle for years. She’d run the gamut of home party products, including sex toys, which I’d discovered, much to my horror, when I moved back home. I hoped she didn’t hear Ev ask me about having a date. I didn’t need her butting her nose into that. Or making suggestions.

Shake in hand, Mom left the house in her nuclear green spandex pants without saying another word.

“What’s with the glasses?” I motioned toward Ev’s face.

“Oh! Aren’t they great?” Ev pushed the glasses up on her nose. “One of my clients made them. She uses recycled water bottles for the frames.” Ev was a publicist for independent artists. Unfortunately, most of them didn’t make much money, so Ev often swapped her time for product.

I brought my breakfast over to the table, and Ev joined me
.
“They’re fabulous.” I lied, not asking her if there was a prescription. I knew she could see just fine. They were way too big for her face, and after this weekend, I’d probably never see her wear them again. “Stop changing the subject and tell me what we’re doing.”

“You asked about my glasses!” She whacked me. “So mom and I went to the farmer’s market this morning on the way home from the commuter rail, and---“

“If this has to do with organic radishes, I may never talk to you again.”

“Let me finish! I made an awesome salad with all organic veggies while I was waiting for you to get your ass out of bed,” she giggled when I rolled my eyes. “You better eat some of it. And Dad wants to barbeque tonight.”

“You’re just going to eat salad? Sucks to be you.”

Evelyn only loved animals, she did
n’
t eat them or wear them. I loved them too, and I admired her conviction. But damn, I loved hamburgers, especially from the grill. With pepper jack cheese. And tomato. “We picked up some veggie burgers.”

“This is all good, but Dad barbeques like three times a week. What are we doing tonight?” The suspense was killing me. What could it be? I hung on to hope that it would make me feel better. Everyone tried so hard, and I couldn’t tell them their efforts just made me miss Jordan more.

“We’ll barbeque first. Bree’s going to come over with the kids so mom can watch them.” Ev continued. That was the other reason I knew Ev’s plans couldn’t have been so great. Any time Bree got out of the house without a diaper bag on her shoulder was monumental. She would’ve spoiled the surprise on account of that alone. “Do you remember Cam Hunter?”

“How could I not? Is he going to jump out of my birthday cake?” Before Ev became Evelyn, the hipster determined to save the world one recyclable at a time, she was Evey, an aspiring country singer. And she was damn good. When she was a senior in high school, she tried out for The Spotlight, the talent competition. She made it all the way to the television part, but nerves got the best of her when the show went live and she flubbed the lyrics in
one of the early rounds. I still think she would have won if that didn’t happen. Cam Hunter was also in The Spotlight that season, but his nerves were just fine. He won the whole thing.

“Kind of. Did you hear about the bar he’s opening?” Ev bounced up and down in her seat with excitement. Obviously she still had a giant crush on him. I’d tease her about it later, but right now, I wanted to know what his bar had to do with my birthday.

“Oh yeah, I think I did.” Cam was from around here, too. Bridgewater, about a half an hour away. It had been really unusual that The Spotlight had two country singers from Massachusetts that season. Because he was local, and Ev had it bad for him, I’d sort of paid attention to his career, but he’d fallen off my radar lately, along with pretty much everything else.

“Guess who’s handling the press for the bar? We’re going to the grand opening!” Ev’s face fell when I didn’t share her excitement. I wasn’t into country music and I really wanted my surprise not to be one of her work things. “It’s invitation only, red carpet and everything.”

That did sound cool. Maybe a little too cool for me. “What the hell am I going to wear?”

“It’s not formal like the Oscars or anything, just wear something cute that you’d wear out.”