Shelter Me (28 page)

Voices echoed outside, at least three. Volunteers, she suspected. But if they found them in here it would break the mood. “Then let me lead.”

She fast-tracked around the corner and hauled him into the storage area stacked with bags and cans of food. The barn was climate controlled to keep everything fresh, and she felt the gust of cool air along her flesh—hot from the day in the sun, but more so from the man.

He pressed her against the closed door, sealing them in quiet privacy. He placed a palm on either side of her, focusing all his considerable concentration on a kiss that made her knees weak and her heart skip beats.

She slipped her fingers between them and worked open his jeans, inching down the zipper and stroking inside, her hands much steadier than her ragged breaths.

Groaning, he broke the kiss and thunked his forehead against the door as he throbbed against her palm.

She tugged his wallet out of his back pocket and found a condom, grateful for the way he was always prepared. He rocked his hips against her, the hard weight of him against her feeling like exactly what she needed. Her fingers fumbled as she flipped the leather wallet onto the planked floor and tore into the foil packet. Growling in impatience, he took the condom from her and sheathed himself with quick efficiency.

He pushed inside her and she sighed in relief. She sagged back against the panel, her muscles going supple with sweet sensation. Her eyes flipped up to his to find him looking at her. Their gazes met. Held. She slid her boot up the back of his calf and wished they were skin to skin.

He surprised her when he cradled her face with infinite tenderness and kissed her all over again. Thoroughly. Sweetly. Her heart sort of folded in on itself, her knees weak with more than just sensual hunger. This man did things to her emotions that completely undid her.

She closed her eyes and lost herself in the moment and the man. She needed this. Needed him with a fierceness she couldn’t question right now.

Soon, so soon, she felt release building inside her, from the urgency, the sweet forgetfulness she’d searched for in his arms.

Tingles spread through her, dissipating even as she tried to hold on to the escape she’d found here. She locked her arms around him and held on tight as he shuddered with his own release.

His heavy breaths caressed her neck, and she could feel the moment slipping away. He pressed a kiss to her temple and caressed her hair back from her face, all signs this interlude was nearing an end. Yet the look in his dark golden eyes just before wouldn’t leave her thoughts. They would go back to the picnic bonfire and pretend to be friends, old lovers who’d moved on.

With her emotions a jumbled mess, she wasn’t so sure she could pull that off anymore.

*   *   *

LACEY REACHED INTO
the garage chest freezer to get two more bags of ice for a fresh container of lemonade to go with the s’mores being made over the bonfire. A cloud of cold air washed across her face, chilling the perspiration from hanging out by the flames. This huge show of support from her friends, helping get her and the kids through Father’s Day, had her struggling not to cry all day.

Last year they’d celebrated Father’s Day early, pretending to be happy and all the while aching at the impending separation. She’d been dreading the upcoming deployment, wishing he’d gotten out at the twenty-year retirement point rather than pushing on. He’d begged her to try just a little longer. That if the Army issued orders for him to move, he promised he would get out then. But for now, he owed his troops. They’d trained together. He couldn’t bail on them. Intellectually, she’d understood. Her heart just shouted with a horrible sense of foreboding that had come true.

She clenched her teeth to hold back the flood of emotion and elbowed the freezer lid shut. Backing away a step, she bumped into a chest, a hard wall of chest. A definitely masculine chest. Doc Vega?

“Steady there, Lacey,” a gravelly voice caressed her ear.

Not
Ray Vega’s.

She turned fast and found—Police Officer Wyatt Parker—the two bags of ice in her grasp pressed between them. “Oh, hello. Uh, is there a problem?”

She shuffled back a step, hating the weird awkwardness that being single again had put into her brain. She always used to have easy relationships with guys, the social cue of being a “Mrs.” a clear boundary that everyone understood. Now?

She freaking hated thinking about this.

“Kenneth Hammond from next door called with a noise complaint about the party, and yes, we all know Valerie put her son up to calling. I suspect she’s pissed over that electric gate and cameras that keep her from sneaking onto your property. Amazing how suddenly the broken fences have stopped.” His mouth went tight for a moment before he continued, “She’s just trying to get more paperwork on the record in hopes of boosting her argument.”

“And will it work?” Tension cranked across her shoulders and throbbed in her head.

“I don’t see anything wrong here. Your gathering is well under control. The animals are contained properly.”

“Thank God.” She sagged against the freezer, the tension easing even if the throb of stress in her temples didn’t go away.

When did it ever these days?

“You’re making my job too easy.”

“Let’s hope it stays that way.”

“Even with the added security, I figured given the problems you’ve had with vandals, it would be a good idea to drop by anyway on my way home. This is the last stop on my shift. In ten more seconds—” He stared at his watch, pausing . . . “I’ll be off. Now. If you have any burgers left, I would be glad to make a donation to your rescue. Wouldn’t want folks to think I was asking for free food.”

“We have plenty of food left, and donations for the animals are always welcome. As is help.” She thrust the bags of ice at him. “Would you mind carrying these?”

A wide grin creased his face that made him more approachable than the stern cop expression he wore more often. “My pleasure, ma’am.”

His smile reached his eyes, and she thought of his wink back at the adoption event. He really was flirting with her. A good-looking guy her age was making subtle and appropriate moves on her—well, aside from the fact that she was so recently widowed any move was a bit off.

An awful, awful notion hit her. That he might think she would be on the lookout for sex.

She flinched and slid away. “Let me show you where the food is.”

“Lead the way,” he said, without the least sign of disappointment or creepiness.

Damn him for being nice. That confused her all the more. She raced toward the door leading back into the house, only to find it blocked. Nathan stood with Doc Vega.

Nathan looked from his mom to the cop and blanched, looking downright pathetic, in spite of the fat snake draped over his shoulders. “Geez, Mom, two guys?”

“Nathan,” she cautioned softly. “Don’t go making assumptions. We’ll talk later.”

Her son shrugged. “Sure, whatever. Could you hurry up with ice?” he mumbled before sulking back into the house.

She touched Ray’s arm lightly. “Would you mind showing Officer Parker where the food is? And where the ice goes? He’s going to join us.”

Ray searched her eyes with a hint of—anger? Jealousy? “Sure. Happy to. This way, Wyatt. We can talk about getting your cat caught up on his vaccinations on our way.”

Confusion filtered through her like the fog that puffed from a freezer, chilling her to her toes in spite of the muggy night. Was she so messed up in the head over her husband’s death she was misreading people’s signals? If so, she could make a total fool of herself. Regardless, right now she had more important things to worry about.

Like making sure her son was okay. Her children and this rescue were all she had left. She didn’t have the time or energy for anything—or anyone—else. Not in a serious way.

She just had to figure out what to do with all these crazy feelings blindsiding her when she was already such a mess.

*   *   *

LEANING AGAINST A
tree away from the rest of the partiers, Sierra held Mike’s hand in the dark. Such a simple pleasure, but nice in the afterglow of the impetuous sex they’d shared in the barn. Trooper and Clementine sprawled asleep in front of them, blocking the show of affection if anyone happened to look their way.

After making love, they’d fastened their clothes quickly and returned to the party before anyone could come looking for them. Hiding their relationship felt silly sometimes, and other times—like now—keeping this secret felt vitally important. Because if people knew, then they would start asking questions.

Are you two back together?

How do you feel about him moving?

Are you going to follow him?

Do you love him?

Mike slid his hand free from hers and leaned forward to Trooper and Clementine, giving both dogs equal time with ear scratches. The strong column of his neck called to her, and it took everything inside her not to lean forward and kiss him, just below his hairline, which had grown a little longer than usual during his time off.

These past weeks had reminded her of all the reasons they’d fallen for each other the first time, but now she had all the more reason for wariness and . . . Hell, it was too late to keep her distance. But she had to do her best to minimize the fallout when he left.

She squeezed her eyes closed tight for a second before blurting something, anything to keep from asking him to stay. “Do you ever wish you had a cat or dog of your own?”

He glanced sideways at her. “What?”

“Do you ever wish you had a pet?”

“Uhm, I . . .” He reclined back on both hands. “I travel too much for too long. The dog would be shuffled around too much. Why did you want to discuss this now?”

Feeling foolish, she swept back her hair. “Never mind. Silly question.”

“Not silly at all.” The moonlight overhead brought out the golden in his tiger eyes. “I don’t have time for a pet, so that’s not fair to the animal. I’ve also never had a pet. Ever. So I don’t even know how to care for one—or rather, I didn’t know until I stayed here.”

“That’s sad.” She cradled his face, the stubble along his jaw a delicious abrasion. “I can’t imagine my life without animals all around me. Nathan’s pets are his only friends. I don’t know how he would have gotten through these past months without them.”

“You have a big heart like your mother. Like your father, too.”

She swallowed hard over the mention of her dad, today of all days. She blinked fast to hold back the tears and blurted the first thing that came to mind. “Maybe you’ll get a dog when you have a family of your own someday.” She bit her lip. So much for keeping things uncomplicated during their remaining time together.

“A family?”

“Don’t freak out. I’m not proposing to you.” Her stomach lurched. “What we have right now is about . . . making peace with the past so we can move on to . . . build our own futures.”

Maybe. She actually had no idea what they were doing anymore.

“So you’re marrying me off to someone else right after we had amazing sex?” he teased lightly, tugging a strand of her hair. “I feel used.”

Her lashes fluttered closed as she inhaled the scent of him, his hand so close to her face. “I didn’t say that.”

“Maybe Debbie would like to be my future bride?” he said, clearly joking.

Still, she couldn’t help but snap, her eyes homing in on the vivacious volunteer dancing barefoot in the light of the bonfire with a local police officer. “She’s ten years older than you are.”

“She’s hot.”

“She’s married.” Not that it was slowing her down at the moment.

Mike kissed Sierra, whispering against her mouth, “Too bad for me then.”

“Stop it.” She tried to stand but he pulled her back to his lap in defiance of all their vows to keep others from knowing they were together. For now. “Forget I said anything about you having a dog or anything about the future.” She needed a do-over button for her life. She’d have it worn out by the end of the day. Her eyes went to her mom on the far side of the bonfire, her face lit by the flames. “Maybe a ten-year age gap isn’t really that much anyway.”

“You’re giving me your blessing to check out Debbie?”

She should be happy he was attempting to keep things light, but she couldn’t deny what she was thinking and feeling right now. “Look at another woman and I’ll cap you.”

“Cap me?” He laughed.

“Okay, I’m not good at ferocious.” She slumped against the tree again, watching the distant party with Doc Vega picking up empty plastic cups. “But I wasn’t talking about Debbie with the ten-year thing. I think it was a Freudian slip. I get this feeling that Ray Vega is checking out my mom.”

“The vet?” Mike asked, following her gaze. “I thought we decided there was nothing going on there. Sure, he’s been coming around on the weekends and they spend a lot of time working rescue stuff, but I’ve never noticed anything more than a common focus on a cause.”

“I hope you’re right, because I don’t think my mom’s ready for anything more than that.” Lacey had always been energetic and full of life, but lately she’d been moving through her world with a frenetic energy that worried Sierra. Beyond that, hell, she just wasn’t ready to think of her mom moving on that way. “But he’s here and he’s watching her. Someday, she will probably return some guy’s interest. I hadn’t thought of that . . .”

“Grief comes in stages.”

The simple truth crystallized so much of what she’d been thinking. Feeling.

His eyes glinted with an understanding and an echo of something resonating deep inside her. She knew Mike had lost family, friends, brothers in arms, and if she was in a better place, she would try to at least help him talk about it. But so much emotion charged the air between them at the moment it threatened to overwhelm her on an already emotional day. She couldn’t do this. Not now.

She shot to her feet and held out her hand. “How about you play your guitar for everyone?”

He stared back for three heavy heartbeats before shoving to his feet and joining her. “Sure. I’ll run up to the loft to get it, then meet you by the fire.”