Shadow Queen (12 page)

              Was it all a lie?  All of the kisses, the intimate words.  The emotion and strife of getting through what we’ve survived together.  I squeezed my fingernails into my palms to remind myself I was alive, that it all happened.  My whole existence wasn’t worth the pain that edged my heart.  If my soul is real, it was dying right now.  I felt like dying.  I couldn’t do this without him.

              Sleep came after five o’clock in the morning.  Szar was above my face at seven sharp with a sword in hand, a long bow, and a quiver of arrows.

              “Come on sleepyhead.  Time to work off that heart and beat up some of our court’s finest guardsmen with your womanly ways.  Carson, your favorite friend of mine you beat up all the time, has graciously volunteered to join us here in enemy territory.”

              “Szar.  Don’t do this,” I pressed my head under the pillow.  The covers shot off of me.

              I was only in my little sleep shorts and tank, but Szar dealt with this his whole life.  Brothers were a cherished thing that no sister appreciated till they came in as the knight and shining armor of safety and security in your deepest, most desperate need.

              “Sorry, sis.  Gotta do this.  Get your little ass up and get dressed.  You have ten minutes and then I’m coming back in here.”

              Yeah, right.  I got dressed anyway.

              “She is not to know any of it,” a voice whispered. 

              I shot backwards and stood hidden in the shadow of the dark hallway.  I wasn’t sure if it was Calum or Szar, but I could feel the buzz my body lit up with when Calum was near.

              “She will die inside,” another voice whispered back angrily.  This was Calum. 

              “Then she lives through it after the fact.  That remains the important factor.  Thorn would kill us himself if she went after him.”

              I knew this was Szar now. 

              “Then give her something.  Letting her think he doesn’t love her and never did is just wrong.  This could be done a different way.”

              “Then let him explain it when he returns.”

              I knew it.  He will be back.  I wanted to jump up and down like a little girl.

              “All I know is he better make up for what he’s doing to her.  I’d sure as hell comfort her with every intention of keeping her.”

              “That right there would get you killed.  He’s dying inside too.  They are meant to be together and all that junk...blah, blah, blah.  He will take care of the problem and then tell her why he had to leave.  For now, you butt out and be her friend only.”             

              Forget jumping, I wanted to dance.  He loves me.  He
loves
me.  That was worth a whole night of heartache to hear this conversation.  I backed up three feet and pretended to bang my toe on the wall.  I heard them go quiet as I rounded the corner.

              Whether it a good thing or not, I saw the look in Calum’s eye.  He bent close and asked how I was feeling.  I faked a sad look well, but was taken aback when he winked at me from an inch away. 

              “You forget, Thorn’s not the only one who can sense you’re near.  And you knew mine first,” he whispered low enough only I heard.

              I hitched a breath, closing my lips.  He knew I was listening.  He told all that for my benefit.  “Oh, Calum.  I can’t thank you enough.”  I hugged him not quite reaching around the middle of him.  He was one huge man.

              “Whatever you need Stace, I’m your man.”

              Szar cleared his throat.  “Get your hands off her. dude.”

              “She needs those who care about her around her right now.  Just ask her.”

              Calum needed this and he just gave more to me than I could ever repay.  “He’s right.  I’d feel better if Calum was my sparring partner today.  He won’t coddle me.”

              Szar scoffed, “Okay, sis.  If you say so.”

              “I know so.  I’ve gone round and round with him in a sparring ring and have yet to beat the boy.  Give me a knife any day.”

              Szar looked at me funny.  I wasn’t being sad enough.  Oops!  I still wanted to scream out in joy.  I slumped my shoulders and turned my back to both of them, “Forget it then.  I’ll just go back to bed.”  I dragged my feet and sighed loud.

              It worked.

              “No.  That’s fine, sis.   Calum it is then.  If he can keep you out of the bed rather than in it, I’m down with that.”  His face warped into a disgusted look as I faced him again.  “Ugh.  Scratch the bed comments.  Just don’t go near her room,” Szar pointed into Calum’s face.

              “Scouts honor,” Calum grinned wickedly.

              I was still too happy to get mad.

              We sparred with swords, for which I lost religiously, and a bo staff loaned to me by Cord that he was akin to part with for even a precious few minutes.  He even gave up the other information I needed. The bite on my neck was obsolete. It was just to scare me.  Yes, she had my blood and could use it to track me, but that would mean she’d have to catch me again. Ha!

              The day waned on with a few secret answers slipped to me in code mostly.  I knew that Cas was with Drac.  He was cornered into to doing something owed to the former Lord Drac without the ability to return.  I had to infer that he was told to cut me lose to perform this task, but I didn’t get any other information that helped me reason the task as being pertinent. 

              The only other fear that arose was the current location of Nara who owned the now reclaimed Godslayer.  Whether she knew where Cas was at the time when she attacked me, I didn’t know.  However, I feared she did have a few more details than considered giving she attacked me precisely when Cas left who just happened to be with
her
sired father.  Coincidence, I think not.

              What I needed to do now, was get information.  When I knew what Cas was expected to do, I could act.  I also worried with why the guys were with me if he was in that kind of trouble.  Why weren’t they helping and why weren’t they able to help?  Or why were they asked not to help?  Watching me exclusively seemed unlikely the best way to solve this unless it was Nara they were thwarting off by being so easily seen.

              I moped and cried at all the right times using Calum to hold me and make it all better.  I knew in my head that Cord and Szar found it odd and that I was using Calum for all the wrong reasons, but he was offering.  I reasoned it out as being just a good friend ever if I ignored the permanent look of want in his eyes.  I smiled and played the friend like I should, nothing more.

              I slept a little more the next night even with the anxiety of what I still didn’t know.  For sure, I got another lucky break the next day.  Cord checked on his faction and left early.  Szar said he’d go home to shower and change and be back in an hour.  Calum was using the weight room while I was being forced to sit in the corner on the makeshift window bench I created the night before to “stay in his sight” while the others were gone.  A guard was at the door.  And I was on a mission.

              I woke up in the night with the brightest of ideas.  It wasn’t the best plan, but it was a plan. 

              He didn’t answer when I called so I texted.

             
Call or text me.  I need to talk.

              I pretended to play on my phone in front of Calum while I waited.

Luckily, I didn’t have to wait long.

             
Call n 5.

              Yes.  I squealed making Calum stop midlift.  “You okay,” he asked.

              “Yeah.  I beat the game.”

              He laughed.  “At least you’re smiling,” his easy grin faded when he looked over at the guard then back to me.  “You okay with a few more sets.”

              I grew up with a weight room in the sparring room and guys galore doing what Calum dearly loved.  "Growing muscles" as I called it.  Their eyes stayed dilated with the constant thrill to bulk up a little more.  I never minded...the watching.  Kassie and I faked many a sword fight to...just watch.

              “Sure.  I’m going to the bathroom and will be back in a few.” 

              The space between his brow rose like it did when he wasn’t happy, “Can it not wait?”

              “Uh, Calum.  Maybe your body talks differently to you, but mine is saying it has to go.  I’m not for giving out details.”  I plucked my hand on and off my hip to make my point.

              He looked back at the guard.  “Clark.”  The unnamed, now named, moved inside the door.  I'd met several new guys in the last twenty-four hours.  “Will you stand inside her bedroom door and keep both eyes on her bathroom door as she enters and exits.  No detours.”

              He asked, but it was telling.  Clark, the typical dark haired guard with all manner of weaponry for clothes, nodded and followed me out.  It amazed me how the Vampires wore as many weapons as the Hunters, but didn't make a sound in movement.  Hunters were patterns walkers.  You could here the slide of their sword being drawn just by the swagger of their gait.

              Once in the secluded bathroom, I silenced the phone and climbed in the shower, then crouched down.  Staring like it was a bomb about to go off, I checked the battery life and messages just to be sure.

              It lit up.

              “Stace.”

              “Lee,” I said low.  The dang shower echoed.  “Just a minute.”  I hoped out and turn the shower full blast, then huddled in the farthest corner.  I held the phone back to my ear, “I’m back.”

              I was met with silence. 

              “Are you there, Lee?”

              “Um, are you in the shower?”

              I giggled low, “No.  I needed to mask my voice.  One of Cas’s guards is right outside the door.”

              More silence.  “Why did you text?”

              “I don’t have much time so I’m just going to put it out there.  I’m not stupid enough to know you’re in the dark about anything so I know you know something about where Cas is and what he’s doing.  I know he’s faking leaving me so don’t try to cover it.  I already weasled that out of someone.  I know he’s with Drac and I know he’s doing this to keep me safe and secure in his eyes.  What I want to know is what he has to do and when he will have it done?  Oh, and where at the moment, is the infamous Nara?”

              Silence.

              “Lee?”

              “You’re asking a lot, Stace.”

              “I know.  I can owe you later.  I need this Lee.  I’m not a ratter.  I just want to know what I can do.”

              “If I tell you what I can, will you do as I ask?”
              I thought on this.  “Didn’t I do as you asked the other day?”

              “I mean it.  You won’t have Cas to push you to refuse it.  You’ll do exactly as I ask.”

              I bent a major rule I’d kept till now with Lee.  I went with my heart.  “I trust you.”

              A soft gasp went through the phone.  I guess he needed to hear that.  Hey, I was getting better at people relations just not exceptional at it yet.  I pray I wasn’t screwing up too bad with Calum first, and now Lee.

              “Call me at exactly midnight, be clothed, and tell your fellow conspirator Hunter to be packed tight.”

              “You knew it was Calum?’

              “This game will get worse before it gets better.  Sainthood didn’t include any man with whom
you
, Anastacia Anat, deals with.” 

              The way he pointedly said “you” gave me a distinct feeling he was specifying just me and the men in my life.  Since I knew very few girls, that meant close to anyone I knew. 

              "My one request."

              "Yes?" I hoped it was something I could hold to.

              "Act indifferent, not defeated."

              The phone clicked just as there was a knock at the door.  Startled, I turned the water off and yelled through the door, “Just a second.”  I pocketed my phone in the back of my jeans and turned the lock.  Calum nervously paced outside and abruptly halted in front of me when he looked up.  Running his eyes up and down me several times he said slowly his voice purposely detached, “Clark.  That is all.  Can you stand outside the door?”

              I heard Calum’s phone ring.  He silenced it without looking, but glanced down afterward at the message.  His face froze into a pinched lemon before he barked out, “What?  No shampooing in a seventeen minute shower?  You don’t smell different.”

              I know I turned bright red.  I side checked Clark to see if he was following the line of thought.  “I wasn’t aware you were keeping tabs.”